Men....have you ever been attacked by a cougar?

[terry78]

Yes, this thread title is a play on the older woman trolling for young meat. Me and an associate of mine left work today to catch the train, and this woman who had to be about 50, though she looked pretty decent, basically came up to my friend and asked if he was seeing anybody..blatant. He said no, and she gave him her number and told him to call her this week. My first thought was, this must be some kind of tranny or somebody that's going to rob his ass at some point, but she was a professional looking chick for the most part, had a desparate housewife thing going. I was like, "you gonna hit that?" and he laughed and was like, "i don't know, man...that's crazy." If it happened to you, or if it has, would you, or did you...as they say, "hit that?"

 

[Bruce Banner]

I've been with a cougar. I felt awkward it was last august. We both were Jeep drivers which started as small talk in a grocery store parking lot. It lead to getting food at a panera bread around the corner. I hung out with her a couple days. Watching that stuff on Spike Tv where the asian guys do ridiculous stuff and fall alot. Then I got stuck watching drumline which didn't hold my interest. Then things started to get interesting. My back hurt the next day thou. She had a waterbed. She was 34 and good looking.

It was a interesting an memorable moment in my life.

 

[Bruce Banner]

My first double post...damn

 

[Joker]

God I f**king wish.

 

[Sawyer]

I'm holding out for this Cougar...
[YT]0wrauoUUpnM[/YT]

 

[Prison Mike]

I'm holding out for this Cougar...

and what a cougar she is...

 

[Bruce Banner]

Just seeing that video makes me want to call my cougar up.

 

[enterthemadness]

Dude, I've seen plenty of women in my life that are in the 30-50 range that are cougars, so yes, I would hit it....HARD.

cause women in their 20's don't know what they want.

 

[Joker]

When did SHH steal Something Awfuls :iama***: smiley?

 

[Bruce Banner]

I hate the smiley.

 

[Sawyer]

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

God I f**king wish.

You and me both!

 

[Bruce Banner]

.........

So how would you go about calling up cougar after a year?

 

[Majic Walrus]

When did a 34 year old become a cougar!?

My best friend slept with a 48 year old. She said he was crazy, he could barely keep up.

 

[Bruce Banner]

When did a 34 year old become a cougar!?

My best friend slept with a 48 year old. She said he was crazy, he could barely keep up.

Idk whats the actual difference cougar is in the 40's and above?

If thats the case she was a milf. She was 14 years older than me.

 

[terry78]

I'm 31 and some of the porn out there has chicks that are like 33 and 34 labeled in the milf or mature category and I'm like, are you serious? I know when you hit your mid 20s in that biz that's your stride, but come on.

 

[Dave McFly]

I'm holding out for this Cougar...
[YT]0wrauoUUpnM[/YT]

god i remember when she was the mom on the tv show of Honey I Shrunk the Kids, and she was also in the movie Striptease, she was the one that had the snake named Monty t:.

 

[Zaron]

I work with a guy that's a ****ing cougar magnet. He's always got older women giving him their numbers. Problem is none of them are hot. In fact most of them are very, very nasty.

 

[Crook]

I'm 31 and some of the porn out there has chicks that are like 33 and 34 labeled in the milf or mature category and I'm like, are you serious? I know when you hit your mid 20s in that biz that's your stride, but come on.

^ The MILF title isn't exclusive to older chicks.

 

[Drakon]

No, but this thread did remind me of a very scary experience, and reminds me why late night Steak and Shake is never a good idea.

I was working at the video store, closing shift. Me and my then-manager were making it perfect for the Regional Manager coming in the next day, so we stayed til like, 4am, sweeping, mopping, dusting, cleaning all the TVs, scrubbing baseboards and the like. Since he was my ride, he treated me to dinner that night at the only place open--Steak and Shake. Now, me being the guy I am [that is, a guy who loves Frisco melts and tiny fries more when they're free], I was more than cool with it. We get this...well, homely waitress. If anyone's seen the episode of Family Guy where Brian finds out he has a son, cross the boy's mom, with Witch Hazel from Looney Toons and you got an idea. She sees my shirt [I don't remember what it was, but it was a metal shirt, so maybe Kittie?], and starts commenting on bands she's seen. I'm a naturally friendly and pretty charismatic guy, and she had already taken my order, so I didn't mind shooting the breeze--we were the only ones in there that late at night anyway. So, she goes in the back and gets me a refill for my drink and notices my long hair...which springs another conversation. At this point, I'm a tad uncomfortable, because it's fairly obvious she's wanting Drak-tion. But she's all "I'll be right back, I wanna get my phone", so she goes out to her car. She comes back like five minutes or so later and she's showing me pics on her phone. "See? This is my uncle, and my aunt, and my cats, and my dad's truck.......and do you know what that is?" She apparently took a pic of her, uh, ta-tas in the car for me. I swear to whatever God you believe in that'll convince you, I turned white. It took me a second to realize what it was. If you have ever touched your thumb to your pinky, and you looked at the palm of your hand near the bottom, that's what it looked like. At first I thought it was just like an accidental shot, til she didn't pass it and she asked me about it. Once it registers.....yeah.

 

[Majic Walrus]

MILFs are just mothers. Cougars or matures should be at least 40+.

 

[Bruce Banner]

MILFs are just mothers. Cougars or matures should be at least 40+.

If thats the case then my fault.

 

[Majic Walrus]

No, but this thread did remind me of a very scary experience, and reminds me why late night Steak and Shake is never a good idea.

I was working at the video store, closing shift. Me and my then-manager were making it perfect for the Regional Manager coming in the next day, so we stayed til like, 4am, sweeping, mopping, dusting, cleaning all the TVs, scrubbing baseboards and the like. Since he was my ride, he treated me to dinner that night at the only place open--Steak and Shake. Now, me being the guy I am [that is, a guy who loves Frisco melts and tiny fries more when they're free], I was more than cool with it. We get this...well, homely waitress. If anyone's seen the episode of Family Guy where Brian finds out he has a son, cross the boy's mom, with Witch Hazel from Looney Toons and you got an idea. She sees my shirt [I don't remember what it was, but it was a metal shirt, so maybe Kittie?], and starts commenting on bands she's seen. I'm a naturally friendly and pretty charismatic guy, and she had already taken my order, so I didn't mind shooting the breeze--we were the only ones in there that late at night anyway. So, she goes in the back and gets me a refill for my drink and notices my long hair...which springs another conversation. At this point, I'm a tad uncomfortable, because it's fairly obvious she's wanting Drak-tion. But she's all "I'll be right back, I wanna get my phone", so she goes out to her car. She comes back like five minutes or so later and she's showing me pics on her phone. "See? This is my uncle, and my aunt, and my cats, and my dad's truck.......and do you know what that is?" She apparently took a pic of her, uh, ta-tas in the car for me. I swear to whatever God you believe in that'll convince you, I turned white. It took me a second to realize what it was. If you have ever touched your thumb to your pinky, and you looked at the palm of your hand near the bottom, that's what it looked like. At first I thought it was just like an accidental shot, til she didn't pass it and she asked me about it. Once it registers.....yeah.

I laughed so hard milk came out of my nose.

 

[SuperFerret]

No, I have not. I have, however been attacked by a puma, a mountain lion and a Florida panther on three non-consecutive occasions.

 

[Majic Walrus]

If thats the case then my fault.

It's cool. You were young and needed the money.