My Friend Bumped Uglies with HIS COUSIN!

[Lighthouse]

I guess I'm one of the few thats not totally grossed out by this. Sure, its kinda gross, I'd never want to have relations with any of my cousins, but I guess I don't see it as completely disgusting like if the guy was putting it to his sister. Maybe I've read too much Jane Austen.

 

[Sloth7d]

This was originally brought up in the Hype Lounge the other day. But I wanted some more input on what I should do.


One of my really good buddies got drunk last weekend and ended up having sexual intercourse with his cousin....his blood cousin. It's not like they never see each other or didn't know about one another. They see each other all the time. Well, my buddy had a party last weekend and had a bunch of people over, him and his cousin were drinking alot of Jager and Vodka...so people left, but a few drunks stayed at his house and heard moanings in the middle of the night. My buddy Josh went to see who was having sex and he walked in on my buddy John and his cousin Paula going at it on his bed. I don't think I could look at him the same.


His cousin is hot though. She's 34, mother of 3. But has a nice body, and fake boobs, but they aren't insanely huge...but noticeably big. I had just found out this morning from Josh, and he talked to John about it after it happened and they swore never to speak of it. He didn't go into details or anything, he just said that when John woke up the next morning, he saw a brunette laying her head on his stomach, and when he looked to see who it was they both jumped up freaking out and she ended up crying.

How do I act around them now?? I'm still in shock and grossed out.

What should I do now? What do I say??

Advice Pleaset:

What do you do?!
You never let him forget this, that's what you do. At every opportunity you take the chance to indirectly remind him of this incident. Like if you ever catch him drinking again, grab the glass and stop him. Look him in his eyes and say,"you sure about that?" Hell, even smirk if you don't think you're pissing him off enough. I mean really let him have it. If there's ever something on t.v. about a pedophile molesting his family member or something similar, make a comment like, "Ew, can you imagine having sex with one of your family members? That's disgusting." I mean really let him have it. If the guy wants to go out looking for girls, inadvertly drive to his cousins. If there are other women there, drive to his Aunts house. If there are women there, drive to his moms house. If there are women even there, tell him his cousin wants to come along. And I know you're wondering, "why Sloth7d? Why torment my friend like this?" Why? Cause it's funny, that's why. And remember, if you feel even the faintest feeling to not take advantage of your friends fault, just remember: This crap is the funniest crap ever. I mean your friend screwed up big time, and you'll never get another chance to mentally destroy him like you will now. And besides, what's a life time of friendship compared to a few seconds of comedy? Nothing, that's what.

 

[Lighthouse]

Double Post

 

[Victarion]

Did he at least use a condom?

 

[Lighthouse]

What do you do?!
You never let him forget this, that's what you do. At every opportunity you take the chance to indirectly remind him of this incident. Like if you ever catch him drinking again, grab the glass and stop him. Look him in his eyes and say,"you sure about that?" Hell, even smirk if you don't think you're pissing him off enough. I mean really let him have it. If there's ever something on t.v. about a pedophile molesting his family member or something similar, make a comment like, "Ew, can you imagine having sex with one of your family members? That's disgusting." I mean really let him have it. If the guy wants to go out looking for girls, inadvertly drive to his cousins. If there are other women there, drive to his Aunts house. If there are women there, drive to his moms house. If there are women even there, tell him his cousin wants to come along. And I know you're wondering, "why Sloth7d? Why torment my friend like this?" Why? Cause it's funny, that's why. And remember, if you feel even the faintest feeling to not take advantage of your friends fault, just remember: This crap is the funniest crap ever. I mean your friend screwed up big time, and you'll never get another chance to mentally destroy him like you will now. And besides, what's a life time of friendship compared to a few seconds of comedy? Nothing, that's what.

If there was a how-to guide called "How To Be Murdered By Your Best Friend", this would be it.

 

[BizarroAids]

hm this is quite the conundrum if I were you I would be there for my friend, I mean the guy was drunk and he's probably really embarressed. More *****ed up things have happened than that, ya know?

I DO want to be there for him. But another part of me doesn't want him knowing that I know. And we could move on, but I know it won't work like that. I can console him alot, but the damage is done.

This sort of thing (not cousins) has happened before between a friend of ours and we don't even speak anymore. So I can only imagine what would happen with this.

Wasn't marrying your cousin pretty common, even as recently as 50 years ago? Einstein married his cousin.

Yeah back then it wasn't all that weird. But this is todays society...it's EXTREMELY frowned aponed and considered gross and umoral.

One question...

If they were "noticeably big" would it be alright?

Spoiler

Just in case you are having trouble with the answer. The answer would be "Hell ****ing No!!!!"

I was just trying to describe her to some extent. Not that her hotness would matter, I just wanted to let you know she wasn't some 300 pound touthless chick.

In my hand is a text I wanted to send him

"Incest is the best, put your cousin to the test!"

But that's probably not a good thing.

 

[Sloth7d]

If there was a how-to guide called "How To Be Murdered By Your Best Friend", this would be it.

And it's spin off book, "How to Get Your Friend Convicted of Murder".

 

[Deep Thinkin'!]

duuude, this is really messed up.

 

[BizarroAids]

What do you do?!
You never let him forget this, that's what you do. At every opportunity you take the chance to indirectly remind him of this incident. Like if you ever catch him drinking again, grab the glass and stop him. Look him in his eyes and say,"you sure about that?" Hell, even smirk if you don't think you're pissing him off enough. I mean really let him have it. If there's ever something on t.v. about a pedophile molesting his family member or something similar, make a comment like, "Ew, can you imagine having sex with one of your family members? That's disgusting." I mean really let him have it. If the guy wants to go out looking for girls, inadvertly drive to his cousins. If there are other women there, drive to his Aunts house. If there are women there, drive to his moms house. If there are women even there, tell him his cousin wants to come along. And I know you're wondering, "why Sloth7d? Why torment my friend like this?" Why? Cause it's funny, that's why. And remember, if you feel even the faintest feeling to not take advantage of your friends fault, just remember: This crap is the funniest crap ever. I mean your friend screwed up big time, and you'll never get another chance to mentally destroy him like you will now. And besides, what's a life time of friendship compared to a few seconds of comedy? Nothing, that's what.

Ok, here's my thing. Dude you are right!! The devil side of me would have a hay day with that. All the little pranks I would do, all the little cousin jokes I could pull, would be worth it. But sadly he's not the type that would take it like that. He would be pissed. Like for example.

The time our "former"friends mom gave me a hand*** and let me "play in the middle of her chest" he got mad at ME! Calling me an untrue friend saying I was worthless and I didn't use my brain, that I acted only on impulse. So naturally the other guy hates me and we no longer talk. But for John to overreact like that is horrid. Considering that HE himself would have done the same if he was given the opportunity, and that we were at a bar just having fun and it's not like we had sex. We were standing outside by the cars.

And to this day, he still gives me crap about it. Saying stuff like "oh, you plan on drinking and messing with my mom?"

See, I'm stuck, by doing the right thing, or doing what he would do to me.

Did he at least use a condom?

I keep wondering that myself. I asked Josh if they got into and he said that they were suppose to talk more later, at that point he was more freaked out.

 

[Mr. Credible]

where're the pics?

sorry... bad form.

but in response to the subject of the thread... i did have some pretty filthy sex with my step dad's twin brother's adopted daughter one time... not really the same thing, but still.

oh, and my uncle's wife tried to set me up with her niece. i refused, because i'd kown her since i was like, 8, but looking back, i probably shouldn't have. she was pretty good looking

 

[Badger]

My guess is if he was drunk enough to **** his cousin, he probably didn't think to "Wrap Up".

 

[BizarroAids]

My guess is if he was drunk enough to **** his cousin, he probably didn't think to "Wrap Up".

Sadly, a part of me is thinking that too. And it's sucks too, she doesn't have her tubes tied to my knowledge. She's always talking about more kids and stuff.

 

[BizarroAids]

where're the pics?

sorry... bad form.

but in response to the subject of the thread... i did have some pretty filthy sex with my step dad's twin brother's adopted daughter one time... not really the same thing, but still.

oh, and my uncle's wife tried to set me up with her niece. i refused, because i'd kown her since i was like, 8, but looking back, i probably shouldn't have. she was pretty good looking

I'll have to get them off my computer. Are you more interested in seeing HER or the him/her combo??

 

[Mr. Credible]

oh, and to the creator of this thread: you're really just taking this way too hard.

so he effed his older hot cousin... yeah, it's weird and gross, but it has absolutely nothing to do with you in any way, shape, or form. tell him you know if you want to, why would you not? there's no reason to lie about it. either you guys have a good laugh about it, or, at the very least, he'll stop giving you crap about you getting a hand-jay from your friends mom (or whatever that story you made up was).

 

[Mr. Credible]

I'll have to get them off my computer. Are you more interested in seeing HER or the him/her combo??

her, mostly.

and by mostly, i mean only.

 

[BizarroAids]

oh, and to the creator of this thread: you're really just taking this way too hard.

so he effed his older hot cousin... yeah, it's weird and gross, but it has absolutely nothing to do with you in any way, shape, or form. tell him you know if you want to, why would you not? there's no reason to lie about it. either you guys have a good laugh about it, or, at the very least, he'll stop giving you crap about you getting a hand-jay from your friends mom (or whatever that story you made up was).

Yes because I love to go around making up random stories on a superhero forum.

And I'm taking it hard because he is a really good friend of mine. And I know for sure he doesn't want me to know. But I also know that Josh couldn't keep it to himself, he's a big mouth as well. And he swore he wouldn't tell. So by saying it, I'm also breaking a bind between him and Josh, because he'll think he can't trust him.

 

[Twin2]

Man you better hope none of their friends are part of this forum. Also trust them to deal with it at this point, if you really think something bad is going to happen talk with him, otherwise it will only be made worse by any interference.

 

[BizarroAids]

Man you better hope none of their friends are part of this forum. Also trust them to deal with it at this point, if you really think something bad is going to happen talk with him, otherwise it will only be made worse by any interference.

I know that John and Josh both visit this site daily. I'm the one who introduced them to it. But we've never talked about the forums. So I don't know if they are members or not. I know they do post on forums alot, but i'm sure they would have sent me a message by now if they were on here.

 

[AndThePickles]

I keep wondering (no matter how drunk he was) if that somewhere in his subconscience, if he remembers ANY part of doing her. Whether he thought he was having a sick dream about it, or he semi knew what he was doing and just wanted to go with since the deed had already been done.

I'm pretty sure I got a picture of all of us together that night. I'll look and post it up.

Honestly, no matter how drunk you are, I very much believe that you won't do anything that you haven't considered doing sober. Alcohol doesn't make you go "crazy." For example, people that use alcohol as an excuse for cheating...that's all it is- an EXCUSE. If you'd never cheat sober, you'll never cheat drunk, either.

I think your cousins must have had the secret hots for each other to an extent, or this never would have happened.

 

[bullets]

I think what makes it worse is that there are so many people tha tknow about this. it should of been looked at as a mistake and never mentioned again . it's best not to bring it up and let this be forgotten . i'm sure it wont be entirely forgotten but they dont need to be reminded everyday of what happened.

 

[bullets]

I think your cousins must have had the secret hots for each other to an extent, or this never would have happened.

They definately had some attraction to one another .

 

[Crook]

1) Extreme pic violation, friend. Correct this immediately.

2)

 

[Superman4ever]

I know that John and Josh both visit this site daily. I'm the one who introduced them to it. But we've never talked about the forums. So I don't know if they are members or not. I know they do post on forums alot, but i'm sure they would have sent me a message by now if they were on here.

You're using their names?

 

[Matt]

How should you approach it? Don't.

Exactly.

 

[BizarroAids]

Honestly, no matter how drunk you are, I very much believe that you won't do anything that you haven't considered doing sober. Alcohol doesn't make you go "crazy." For example, people that use alcohol as an excuse for cheating...that's all it is- an EXCUSE. If you'd never cheat sober, you'll never cheat drunk, either.

I think your cousins must have had the secret hots for each other to an extent, or this never would have happened.

I actually never looked at it that way, until you brought it up.

That's a bit more disturbing, but does make sense. What's that old saying "Drunk sayings are sober thoughts" or something like that. What would drive me over the wall is if they talked about it before hand and planned it out..then they got walked in on by Josh, so he had to make something up the next day....but I don't think that's scenario.

Outside of the HYPE, only 4 of us know about it. Including the 2 involved.