Keep telling yourself that, monkey-man. Everyone comment after entries for me. It inflates my ego... errr... helps me know what I'm doing right. Yeah, that's it. Oh, who am I kidding?
------------------------------------
Abaddon: Come out, boys!
bored: Dude, that's enough. We've freaked the hell out of them.
Dog Lips: Besides, we're near the kitchen now, and we don't want you-know-who thinking the ship's being overrun by aliens.
TheSumofGod: Die, hairy scum!
Abaddon: Huh?
Sum tackled Abaddon, raised up a knife, and plunged it down.
Maxwell's Demon: It sounds like he's found them.
Dread: I hope he cuts those wine-drinkers into pieces.
LarryLegend: Hey, who are you guys?
The cook scratched his head.
sinewave: We're film-makers. Did you know that this ship is being invaded by dog people?
LarryLegend: Dog people? Like Dog Lips? That's just his name. Well, and he likes to sniff people's butts as a greeting.
sinewave: All we know is that a bunch of people are turning into dogs out there, and another cook went to take them out.
LarryLegend: Another cook? Wait, did he end every statement with his name?
sinewave: No.
LarryLegend: ****. People are going to get hurt.
Dog Lips: DUDE!
bored: Not cool, Sum! Not cool!
TheSumofGod: Those journalists... They... they seemed so genuine.
bored: We were playing a
prank, Sum!
LarryLegend: Sum! Oh, dammit, Sum, what have you done?
Abaddon: *groan*
TheSumofGod: I thought he was a dog-creature.
LarryLegend: So I'm told. Did you stab Abaddon?
TheSumofGod: Well...
Jaguarr: Hey, what's going on?
Jag
The third cook looked at the scene, confused.
LarryLegend: Sum tried to kill Abaddon, because he thought he was a dog-creature.
Jaguarr: Gotcha. Well, good thing I took these with me last time I left the kitchen.
Jag
He pulled out the knives normally found in the kitchen.
Abaddon: I am a lucky, lucky person. Hey, maybe I can score with Twylight after all!
bored: Don't push it, Ab. So what did Sum attack Abaddon with?
TheSumofGod glanced at his knife, and noticed the writing on the side.
TheSumofGod: Play-Skool?
Jaguarr: Do you think I'm stupid enough to leave you alone with sharp objects, Sum?
Jag
Abaddon: Well, that explains the lack of gaping chest wound. My head hurts like hell now, though.
Dog Lips: Go to the infirmary and have that looked at.
Abaddon: Will Twylight be there?
Dog Lips: Not if she hears you talk about her so much. Larry, go get those film-makers, and take them to the bridge. Malice is probably going to want to talk to them.
TheSumofGod: You know, Jaguarr, one of these days, we really will be attacked by aliens, and I won't be able to defend myself from them.
Jaguarr: Sure, like that'll ever happen. Aliens, attack
us? Preposterous!
Jag
bored: You're nuts, Sum.
Dog Lips: Totally off your rocker.
The Squirrel: You should get therapy.
bored: Ah! Dammit, Squirrel, don't sneak up on us like that!
Later, on the Bridge.
Malice: I'm very disappointed in you, Dog Lips.
Dog Lips: I understand, Malice.
Malice: We have people who are going to show our mission to the world, and you do
this to them?
Dog Lips: I was just having some fun.
...
.....
Malice: I don't care, boy! There is nothing fun about pulling out sinewave's chair from under him
when I'm not watching. Perfectly good spill, I think he's got a bruise on his ass now and everything, and I missed it!
Dog Lips: Sorry, sir.
Malice: Also, Dread thought it was odd when you sniffed him. Thought you were getting a little too intimate.
Dog Lips: Force of habit. I used to work as an airport security guard.
Malice: Well, I suppose old habits die hard.
Mr. Thing: With a vengeance!
Malice: Who said you could talk?
Mr. Thing: Aw
.
Malice: Well, it's about time to leave orbit and head to Mars. DBella, call everyone to the Bridge. We're all going to sing "Rocket Man" as we start moving.
Holly Goodhead: They do that here, too?
DBella: It was worse when we first left Earth. That time, it was "We Built This City" by Starship.
Holly shuttered.
Karem-Knight: Oh, joyous occasion! The Red Planet awaits us!
Elijya: Now, why can't the rest of the crew have your enthusiasm, KK?
Karem-Knight: They simply don't appreciate how monumentous this truly is, my liege.
Malice: Note to self, get toady for next mission.
The other members of the crew, including the documentarians, arrived at the Bridge.
Malice: Okay, everyone remember their choreography?
Corinthian: Oh, si, si. I do the, you know, the doh-see-doh.
Malice: Okay, then. DBella, hit the stereo and dim the lights!
DBella: *sighing* Yes, sir.
The entire crew then staged an elaborate rendition of "Rocket Man" that would do Elton John proud. Shatner would only let out a 'meh', though. It takes a lot to impress Teh Shatner.
Malice:
She packed my bags last night pre-flight
Zero hour nine a.m.
And I'm gonna be high as a kite by then
I miss the earth so much I miss my wife
It's lonely out in space
On such a timeless flight
Elijya:
And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone
Zev:
Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids
In fact it's cold as hell
And there's no one there to raise them if you did
And all this science I don't understand
It's just my job five days a week
A rocket man, a rocket man
Corinthian:
Y pienso que va a ser un rato largo.
Everyone:
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone
Unbeknownst to anyone, sinewave accidentally hit a button while doing a cartwheel. It beeped for a moment, as the word 'transmit' glowed.
Meanwhile, across the solar system....
FunBobPants: Sir, we're getting a message.
Master Bruce: Play it for me, Lieutenant Pants.
The captain of the ship, who wore a pointy-eared cowl, grimaced as he heard the entire musical number.
Master Bruce: Elton John? This is an outrage! These Earthlings have insulted me for the last time!
:heart:
you got owned by the narrator!
