One Ultimatum Universe OOC: Holographic Varient!!

[Optikal]

ONE ULTIMATUM UNIVERSE: HOLOGRAPHIC VARIANT!!
​

In this RPG, much like the other Main RPGs you can be any character in the known universe, fictional or otherwise. However, You must have in inate ability to completely f-ck their sh-t up and destroy any vestige of the character you choose to play.

You want to wantonly kill other people? Go ahead. You want BIG F-CK OFF LASERS!!? they're yours! You want to randomly destroy the cosmos with your telepathy? Feel free! Basically in this RPG, it's one big free-for-all deathmatch where anything goes.

But I hear what you're saying... "Wait, Thor doesn't have a bazooka!" Well he does now, B*tch! BOOM!

Welcome to Ultimatum. F-CK YEAH!

GameMasters: Optikal & Gallagher

*******
​

Example Of Characters Application:

Name:

The Character You would like to play:

Character Bio:

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

*******


ROSTER

Grant Morrison
Keyser Soze

Big Boss
Gallagher

Jesus, Son of Christ
Optikal

Superman
Byrd Man

Delores Byrdington [Byrds Momma]
Spike X1

Darth Vader
Batman

Horatio Caine
wiegeabo

Chuck Norris
Catman_prb

Teddy "the Real Captain America" Roosevelt
Watchman

Daron Malakian
Johnny Blaze


​

 

[Gallagher]

Oh my god playing this is going to be like drubbing the perpetual soap.

Nonsensical euphemisms ABOUND!

 

[Optikal]

[FONT=Lucida, Verdana, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif]Unbeknownst to me, they were all
exploring the Spanish turtle

[/FONT]

 

[Spike_x1]

In this RPG, much like the other Marvel RPGs you can be any character in the Marvel universe. However, You must have in inate ability to completely f-ck their sh-t up and destroy any vestige of the character you choose to play.

Only Marvel? I thought you were going to change that? I so had my heart set on Byrd's momma.

 

[Keyser Soze]

Name: Keyser Soze

The Character You would like to play: Grant Morrison

Character Bio:
Superstar comic book writer Grant Morrison was born in Glasgow, Scotland, immediately establishing his awesomeness. Beginning his career writing various British comics in the late 70s and early 80s, Morrison's big breakthrough came when he wrote Animal Man for DC, putting him at the head of the "British Invasion" of American comics through the late 80s. Since then, Morrison has written for such iconic characters as Batman, Superman and the X-Men, as well as creating a host of critically-acclaimed works such as WE3 and The Invisibles.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

Grant Morrison had written extensively on the often temptestuous relationship between fiction and the real world. But now, he was going to take this experimentation to a whole new level, as he prepared to personally venture into the comic book realm.

"I AM A WRITER!" Grant Morrison declared, "IN THE FICTIONAL REALM, I AM A GOD! MY POWERS HOLD NO LIMITS!!!!!!!!!!!"

Armed with a typewriter and a cocktail of hallucogenic drugs, Morrison began his incredible journey through the fabric of reality, emerging reborn as a drawn image on a page.

"Now when I speak, there are speech bubbles above my head," Morrison said aloud, stroking his chin thoughtfully, "A couple of pages from now, something blows up."

 

[Gallagher]

Only Marvel? I thought you were going to change that? I so had my heart set on Byrd's momma.

Teensy mistake on Op's part, too much copying and pasting. Tsk.

Anyone is allowed. ****ing anyone.

Also, Keys is mother ****ing approved.

 

[Optikal]

Only Marvel? I thought you were going to change that? I so had my heart set on Byrd's momma.

Sorry Spike. That's what happens when posting drunk lol.

ONE UNIVERSE!

 

[Optikal]

Name: Keyser Soze

The Character You would like to play: Grant Morrison

Character Bio:
Superstar comic book writer Grant Morrison was born in Glasgow, Scotland, immediately establishing his awesomeness. Beginning his career writing various British comics in the late 70s and early 80s, Morrison's big breakthrough came when he wrote Animal Man for DC, putting him at the head of the "British Invasion" of American comics through the late 80s. Since then, Morrison has written for such iconic characters as Batman, Superman and the X-Men, as well as creating a host of critically-acclaimed works such as WE3 and The Invisibles.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

Grant Morrison had written extensively on the often temptestuous relationship between fiction and the real world. But now, he was going to take this experimentation to a whole new level, as he prepared to personally venture into the comic book realm.

"I AM A WRITER!" Grant Morrison declared, "IN THE FICTIONAL REALM, I AM A GOD! MY POWERS HOLD NO LIMITS!!!!!!!!!!!"

Armed with a typewriter and a cocktail of hallucogenic drugs, Morrison began his incredible journey through the fabric of reality, emerging reborn as a drawn image on a page.

"Now when I speak, there are speech bubbles above my head," Morrison said aloud, stroking his chin thoughtfully, "A couple of pages from now, something blows up."

 

[Gallagher]

Name: Gallagher(Not the Comedian guy.)

The Character You would like to play: WILL SMITH

Character Bio: West Phillideliphia born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days, chillin' out max and relaxin' all cool n shootin' some B-Ball outside of the school etc

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

"AW HELL NAWW." Replied the sassy Black actor, striking the elderly man in the penis angrily.

"Y'all be trippin'!" He put to the man, who may, in fact be 'trippin'. Perhaps he was tripping balls.

"Speakin' o' yo balls!" Smith quipped hilariously (albeit nonesensically, by all means he shouldn't be able to read the descriptive text) as a laugh track errupted in the surrounding area. The young actor dug deep, clenching his fist around the apparently random elderly chap's nackers and squeezed with all his might, making a rather hilarious face.

"Yo man dis don't mean I'm gay!" Laugh track.

"Like hell it don't." The laugh track ends abruptly replaced with 'WOOOOOOOO' as the obligatory cameo by DJ Jazzy Jeff begins.

"Yo man, Jazz! This guy just tried to sell me drugs!"

"Oh man... That cold. Drugs is bad y'all. Respect your parents. Wickity."

Everyone in the immediate area learns something, DJ Jazzy Jeff's epic life lesson negates any and all humour previously observed.

Jazz is then thrown out of a door.

 

[wiegeabo]

Every application makes me orgasm.

 

[Optikal]

Character Application:

Name: Optikal

The Character You would like to play: Jesus Mother F-cking Christ

Character Bio: The Son of God, the savior of the people. Badass magical powers motherf-cker that made guys wearing sandals and a night dress look cool.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

"B-tch, empty this register right now or I'ma pop a cap in yo' ass!" the thug screamed, waving his pistol in the face of the frightened cashier.

The old man trembled as he stuff the days meagre takings into an old plastic bag as the hooded gunman jigged on the spot, glancing at the door and waving his gun excitedly.

"Hurry that **** up motherf-cker!" he grumbled impatiently.

Suddenly, the lights in the store went out, plunging the little 7-11 into darkness. The kid grabbed the bag from the old cashiers hand and bolted for the door. As he ran past a shelf of Oreos (on a 3 for 2 special offer) the front of the store ripped away into a tremendous din of broken glass and twisted metal.

A shaft of light drenched the front of the scene as a saintly figure gracefully decended from the sky. Watching the newcomer touch down on the asphalt, the robber unloaded his weapon on the hero, flinching back as the bullets ricocheted from the newcomers golden aura.

"Who are you?" the robber screeched, still clicking the trigger and not realising the clip was empty.

The man lit a cigarette butt and took a long deliberate drag, eyeing the panicked kid. With no hesitation, he reached behind his robed back and pulled out a mean looking assault rifle and levelled it. "I died for your sins kid. Now it's your turn. They Call me Christ. Jesus Christ".

The assault rifle unloaded, ripping the robber to bloody shreds. As the tattered corpse hit the floor, Jesus turned to the terrified shop keeper and offered a smile. "Don't forget church on sunday". he growled before turning from the scene.

Somewhere in the distance, something blew up.

 

[Gallagher]

Approved Op.

With a vengeance.

 

[Optikal]

Name: Gallagher(Not the Comedian guy.)

The Character You would like to play: WILL SMITH

Character Bio: West Phillideliphia born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days, chillin' out max and relaxin' all cool n shootin' some B-Ball outside of the school etc

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

"AW HELL NAWW." Replied the sassy Black actor, striking the elderly man in the penis angrily.

"Y'all be trippin'!" He put to the man, who may, in fact be 'trippin'. Perhaps he was tripping balls.

"Speakin' o' yo balls!" Smith quipped hilariously (albeit nonesensically, by all means he shouldn't be able to read the descriptive text) as a laugh track errupted in the surrounding area. The young actor dug deep, clenching his fist around the apparently random elderly chap's nackers and squeezed with all his might, making a rather hilarious face.

"Yo man dis don't mean I'm gay!" Laugh track.

"Like hell it don't." The laugh track ends abruptly replaced with 'WOOOOOOOO' as the obligatory cameo by DJ Jazzy Jeff begins.

"Yo man, Jazz! This guy just tried to sell me drugs!"

"Oh man... That cold. Drugs is bad y'all. Respect your parents. Wickity."

Everyone in the immediate area learns something, DJ Jazzy Jeff's epic life lesson negates any and all humour previously observed.

Jazz is then thrown out of a door.

100% Approved

 

[wiegeabo]

Character Application:

Name: Optikal

The Character You would like to play: Jesus Mother F-cking Christ

Character Bio: The Son of God, the savior of the people. Badass magical powers motherf-cker that made guys wearing sandals and a night dress look cool.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

"B-tch, empty this register right now or I'ma pop a cap in yo' ass!" the thug screamed, waving his pistol in the face of the frightened cashier.

The old man trembled as he stuff the days meagre takings into an old plastic bag as the hooded gunman jigged on the spot, glancing at the door and waving his gun excitedly.

"Hurry that **** up motherf-cker!" he grumbled impatiently.

Suddenly, the lights in the store went out, plunging the little 7-11 into darkness. The kid grabbed the bag from the old cashiers hand and bolted for the door. As he ran past a shelf of Oreos (on a 3 for 2 special offer) the front of the store ripped away into a tremendous din of broken glass and twisted metal.

A shaft of light drenched the front of the scene as a saintly figure gracefully decended from the sky. Watching the newcomer touch down on the asphalt, the robber unloaded his weapon on the hero, flinching back as the bullets ricocheted from the newcomers golden aura.

"Who are you?" the robber screeched, still clicking the trigger and not realising the clip was empty.

The man lit a cigarette butt and took a long deliberate drag, eyeing the panicked kid. With no hesitation, he reached behind his robed back and pulled out a mean looking assault rifle and levelled it. "I died for your sins kid. Now it's your turn. They Call me Christ. Jesus Christ".

The assault rifle unloaded, ripping the robber to bloody shreds. As the tattered corpse hit the floor, Jesus turned to the terrified shop keeper and offered a smile. "Don't forget church on sunday". he growled before turning from the scene.

Somewhere in the distance, something blew up.

Makes me wish I had applied as Super Mecha Death Christ 2000 Version 4.0 Beta 3.

 

[Gallagher]

Jesus looks like Big Boss.

This made my day.

 

[Optikal]

Apply, Wieg

 

[Byrd Man]

Name: Byrd Man

The Character You would like to play: Superman

Character Bio: Born on Krypton, Kal-El was rescued from the doomed planet by his parents, crash landing on Earth. Disguised as mild mannered reporter Clark Kent, he uses his alien powers to save the day as Superman!

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

Metropolis

I crash through three buildings before coming to a stop in the middle of the busy afternoon traffic. I weave in and out of the cars with the bottle of Jack clamped in my hand.

"**** you, bus!" I yell as I let my heat vision loose. The beams destroy and oncoming school bus filled with children.

"Any of you *****uckers want to fight?!" I scream to no one in particular as I stumble on the streets.

With that, I take off into the air and crash land into the Daily Planet building.

"LOIS! LOIS LANE! I'm here!"

I fall into Lois' office. She's bent over the filing cabinet and her ass is stuck out in the air. I flash her a smile as I pull on my belt.

"This looks like a job for Super-stuper-....whatever the **** my name is."

 

[Gallagher]

Approved. May god help us all.

Also, IC thread tomorrow chaps?

 

[Optikal]

In the morning, old chum

 

[Optikal]

Character Application:

Name: Optikal

The Character You would like to play: Batman

Character Bio: Millionaire Playboy Bruce Wayne got bored of swimming in piles of money and decided to go out and beat up some bad guys whilst dressed from head to toe in rubber. He's the GOD DAMNED BATMAN!

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks) :

Bat-Blog. 10-06-09

He once asked me if I'd ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light. I said no. And told him it sounded totally gay. Then I shot the make-up wearing homo in the face with my Bat-gun.

Life's hard as a man with more money than is humanly possible. Of course, everyone else in the world would love the life of fast cars, loose women, the best drugs and a stupidly big ugly house. Not not me though. My parents died years ago and that makes me sad. Money doesn't make my tears go away. Cheezits, slash-fiction and Xbox 360 do though.

I went Bat-shopping today and bought myself that new Marvel game and some more rubber. Need to extend the cod-piece on the Bat-costume you see. I asked Alfred if he'd do it over breakfast. He said he'd love to work on my piece. Though for some reason, Robin was pouting as he ate his Bat-flakes and drank his Bat-milk. He'll cheer up when I reveal his new rubber costume to him down in the dark, wet Bat-Cave. That boy's growing up so fast that he barely fits into those granny-panties I made him wear for the last ten years.

Anyway, I've got some big party to attend tonight so I need to sign off and get in some play-time. Wolverine is so ****ing cool. If the old man is finished tweaking my cock pouch, I'll probably go sit on a roof and look brooding for a bit. I'll have to make sure Alfred sorts me out a packed lunch next time. Can't exactly walk into Dennys with the ole mask on can I? Anyway, yeah. 360. I'll update the Bat-Blog again soon.

Batman out.

 

[wiegeabo]

Ah ****, Batman's gone emo

 

[Spike_x1]

Name: Spike_x1

The Character You would like to play: Delores Byrdington (aka: Momma Byrd)

Character Bio: She violently supplies the world with moral values, headbutting anything in her path and wielding a giant battle ax against those damn commies and hippies, and especially those f**kers who think that they can get away with wearing socks and sandals.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post (Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks):

"Matty, honey! Stop looking at the pornography on the internets." I stumble out of the bedroom and club our kitten in the face with my empty bottle of Jack Daniels.

"But MaAAawm!! How else am I supposed to spank the monkey!? If I do it with my left hand, it even feels like a stranger!" I turn the corner into the family room to find my dearest boy furiously *********ing.

Oh my.

"NO BACKTALK!"

With one headbutt, he's on the ground and crying like a small girl whose vagina is bleeding for the first time. "Aw, did I hurt your two X chromosomes? I know how sensitive yours are."

"...aAugh...I think you gave me a concussion..."

"WHAT DID I JUST TELL YOU?! NO F**KING BACKTALK!" And with that, I slam the bottle of magically refilled Jack Daniels down into my son's nuts as hard as I can.

 

[Byrd Man]

Momma?

Also, approve this man!

 

[Batman]

Name: Batman

The Character You would like to play: Darth Vader

Character Bio: Bio? Bio?! He's Darth ****ing Vader! The most badass villain in the history of cinema, and the only one who's claim to fame is truly almost-ruler of the galaxy. He was once Anakin Skywalker, a whiny little b**** of a man who felt he deserved more power as a Jedi Knight than he really did. But whenever his limbs were cut off and he was burned alive on the volcano planet Mustafar, everything changed. Suddenly, he was angrier, crispier, and pissed off like no other. Add a darkly clad life support suit and a black man's voice into the mix, and you've just created yourself the baddest Sith Lord this side of Coruscant.

Oh, and he's your father. Try to sleep at night with that thought on your mind.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post(Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks):

Lord Vader walked onto the deck of the Millennium Falcon, having seized the craft a mere few hours ago. Accompanying him were close to ten Stormtroopers, all heavily armed and ready to kill. His cape behind him and flowing wildly, Vader stepped through the revolving door to the cockpit, and met his captives face to face: the scoundrel Han Solo, the temptress Princess Leia, the wookie Chewbacca, C-3PO, and his son, Luke Skywalker.

Vader looked at 3-PO closely, his hoarse breathing being the only sound he made.

"Hello, Master Anakin. I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations. It has been awhile since we've- OH!"

3-PO found a lightsaber jammed into his sternum, his circuits cracking and sparking from the stab. Vader unsheathed it, allowing the android to short-circuit to death. He watched as it did, silently, but calculating. Until it finally died. R2-D2 cried out in agony, which sounded more like random beeping, as the shorter droid shook violently back and forth.

"That takes care of one mistake,", Vader coldly stated, before turning to his captives. "But I am here to rectify another. This ship has just been made property of The Empire, and will become my very own personal transportation."

"Over my dead body, you mangy freak!", Solo shouted, producing a blaster. "No way am I gonna let you take her!"

Vader breathed in, unaffected by the threat.

"I was not requesting your permission, Captain Solo."

Holding out his hand, Vader began to choke the life out of Solo using only the dark side of the force, in full view of the horrified Leia, Chewie, and Luke.

 

[Optikal]

Name: Batman

The Character You would like to play: Darth Vader

Character Bio: Bio? Bio?! He's Darth ****ing Vader! The most badass villain in the history of cinema, and the only one who's claim to fame is truly almost-ruler of the galaxy. He was once Anakin Skywalker, a whiny little b**** of a man who felt he deserved more power as a Jedi Knight than he really did. But whenever his limbs were cut off and he was burned alive on the volcano planet Mustafar, everything changed. Suddenly, he was angrier, crispier, and pissed off like no other. Add a darkly clad life support suit and a black man's voice into the mix, and you've just created yourself the baddest Sith Lord this side of Coruscant.

Oh, and he's your father. Try to sleep at night with that thought on your mind.

Character Photobase:

Sample Post(Must contain three paragraphs, one line of dialogue and wanton use of capital letters and exclamation marks):

Lord Vader walked onto the deck of the Millennium Falcon, having seized the craft a mere few hours ago. Accompanying him were close to ten Stormtroopers, all heavily armed and ready to kill. His cape behind him and flowing wildly, Vader stepped through the revolving door to the cockpit, and met his captives face to face: the scoundrel Han Solo, the temptress Princess Leia, the wookie Chewbacca, C-3PO, and his son, Luke Skywalker.

Vader looked at 3-PO closely, his hoarse breathing being the only sound he made.

"Hello, Master Anakin. I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations. It has been awhile since we've- OH!"

3-PO found a lightsaber jammed into his sternum, his circuits cracking and sparking from the stab. Vader unsheathed it, allowing the android to short-circuit to death. He watched as it did, silently, but calculating. Until it finally died. R2-D2 cried out in agony, which sounded more like random beeping, as the shorter droid shook violently back and forth.

"That takes care of one mistake,", Vader coldly stated, before turning to his captives. "But I am here to rectify another. This ship has just been made property of The Empire, and will become my very own personal transportation."

"Over my dead body, you mangy freak!", Solo shouted, producing a blaster. "No way am I gonna let you take her!"

Vader breathed in, unaffected by the threat.

"I was not requesting your permission, Captain Solo."

Holding out his hand, Vader began to choke the life out of Solo using only the dark side of the force, in full view of the horrified Leia, Chewie, and Luke.

Approved!!