Stephen King's Epic "The Dark Tower" - Part 2

[elgaz]

95 mins. Wow.

The Dark Tower is an epic tale, be you a King fan or not. Stephen King has described the 7 books (8 if you count the Wind Through the Keyhole released later) as 'one long uber-novel'. How they condense the amount of plot, characters and dialogue in those books into a very average-length film is beyond me. I've accepted that they won't do it justice at all, but how they even cover the basic plot points and sell the main characters in 95 mins? I dunno.

The Lord of the Rings film trilogy clocked in at 9hrs and 18 mins. That's the 3 main films, not the Hobbit ones. That's how you do service to an epic fantasy tale.

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

95 mins. Wow.

The Dark Tower is an epic tale, be you a King fan or not. Stephen King has described the 7 books (8 if you count the Wind Through the Keyhole released later) as 'one long uber-novel'. How they condense the amount of plot, characters and dialogue in those books into a very average-length film is beyond me. I've accepted that they won't do it justice at all, but how they even cover the basic plot points and sell the main characters in 95 mins? I dunno.

The Lord of the Rings film trilogy clocked in at 9hrs and 18 mins. That's the 3 main films, not the Hobbit ones. That's how you do service to an epic fantasy tale.

100% this.

 

[FunkMiller]

95 mins. Wow.

The Dark Tower is an epic tale, be you a King fan or not. Stephen King has described the 7 books (8 if you count the Wind Through the Keyhole released later) as 'one long uber-novel'. How they condense the amount of plot, characters and dialogue in those books into a very average-length film is beyond me. I've accepted that they won't do it justice at all, but how they even cover the basic plot points and sell the main characters in 95 mins? I dunno.

The Lord of the Rings film trilogy clocked in at 9hrs and 18 mins. That's the 3 main films, not the Hobbit ones. That's how you do service to an epic fantasy tale.

We're going to get a broadstrokes take on The Dark Tower with zero nuance. It'll all be good vs evil, with about as much depth as a WWE booking. Roland is going to be presented as a square jawed upstanding hero - and not the obsessed, cold, driven bastard that he should be. Walter is going to be a moustache twirling, scenery chewing super villain - and not a cunning, conniving, enigmatic trickster with mysterious motivations. This is a watered down, child friendly sci-fi action movie that will bear little resemblance to its source material, and will not feature a majority of its themes and tone. It's been made to grab a fast buck, not to set up a long running, complex saga.

 

[Rowsdower!]

Yeah. I mean, if I remember right, Walter didn't want to destroy the tower, he just wanted to climb it and make himself into a god or something. Here, McConaughey is all, "IMMA DESTROY THE UNIVERSE!"

 

[FunkMiller]

Yeah. I mean, if I remember right, Walter didn't want to destroy the tower, he just wanted to climb it and make himself into a god or something. Here, McConaughey is all, "IMMA DESTROY THE UNIVERSE!"

Walter's quest is essentially exactly the same as Roland's. That's the beauty of their relationship and conflict. This movie instead puts Walter in The Crimson King role, which is captain stupid.

 

[Rowsdower!]

No, sir. Tom Rothman is Captain Stupid. Maybe he'll relinquish that crown someday, but until he does, that titles is his and his alone.

 

[DarthSkywalker]

We're going to get a broadstrokes take on The Dark Tower with zero nuance. It'll all be good vs evil, with about as much depth as a WWE booking. Roland is going to be presented as a square jawed upstanding hero - and not the obsessed, cold, driven bastard that he should be. Walter is going to be a moustache twirling, scenery chewing super villain - and not a cunning, conniving, enigmatic trickster with mysterious motivations. This is a watered down, child friendly sci-fi action movie that will bear little resemblance to its source material, and will not feature a majority of its themes and tone. It's been made to grab a fast buck, not to set up a long running, complex saga.

There are just times you know something is just not going to be what it should be. I wanted to stay somewhat optimistic, even as images started getting out, and became more and more clear they didn't know a thing about the Dark Tower.

But once the trailer hit, there was no running from what this is. A cheap movie, that does not resemble the Dark Tower outside a few basic images. All the nuance, all the character, all the important things are not there.

 

[Rowsdower!]

One complaint I keep hearing about this is that it looks like a superhero movie. Ummm, no. Most superhero movies these days actually look good.


This looks like a superhero movie... from 1993.

 

[StormC]

Also I just found out the budget is 60 million, so... yeah. I thought Sony was trying to build up their own franchise when this was first revealed, but now they're just trying to do a lazy cash in. Too bad.

The Stephen King book I'm still waiting to see adapted to film is The Long Walk.

 

[Grootster]

I know nothing about the source material, but I saw the trailer in front of Spider-man and I thought it looked pretty interesting and intriguing. As someone who enjoys 90 minute movies, I may check this out when it comes to DVD. I find it a bit odd that people are criticizing this, but praising the trailers for Jumanji and Valerian, which just look terrible to me. This may not be accurate to the source material, but it at least looks like it has the potential to be a decent film.

 

[DarthSkywalker]

One complaint I keep hearing about this is that it looks like a superhero movie. Ummm, no. Most superhero movies these days actually look good.


This looks like a superhero movie... from 1993.

The similarity to the Fantastic Four is kind of startling really. So how about a bad superhero movie?

Though I get what people mean. It doesn't look like high fantasy or a sci-fi western. It looks like they turned Roland into a superhero, one that will rarely bleed, rarely hurt. This doesn't look like Logan, it looks like Green Lantern.

 

[DarthSkywalker]

Also I just found out the budget is 60 million, so... yeah. I thought Sony was trying to build up their own franchise when this was first revealed, but now they're just trying to do a lazy cash in. Too bad.

The Stephen King book I'm still waiting to see adapted to film is The Long Walk.

I am still waiting for The Gunslinger.

I know nothing about the source material, but I saw the trailer in front of Spider-man and I thought it looked pretty interesting and intriguing. As someone who enjoys 90 minute movies, I may check this out when it comes to DVD. I find it a bit odd that people are criticizing this, but praising the trailers for Jumanji and Valerian, which just look terrible to me. This may not be accurate to the source material, but it at least looks like it has the potential to be a decent film.

It looks like it can be decent to you. As you can see, many here don't think it look decent, at all. Generic, boring, and lacking any semblance to the quality source material.

 

[Grootster]

The similarity to the Fantastic Four is kind of startling really. So how about a bad superhero movie?

Though I get what people mean. It doesn't look like high fantasy or a sci-fi western. It looks like they turned Roland into a superhero, one that will rarely bleed, rarely hurt. This doesn't look like Logan, it looks like Green Lantern.

Did we watch the same trailer? I thought this looked far more intriguing and more fresh and original than most recent superhero movie trailers (aside from Marvel's, theirs are always great), of course that's pretty subjective. I really don't see the comparison to a superhero movie at all here, other than the fact that both fall into the action movie category. For what it's worth, my interest was peaked far more by the Dark Tower trailer than any Logan, Justice League, or Wonder Woman trailer.

It looks like it can be decent to you. As you can see, many here don't think it look decent, at all. Generic, boring, and lacking any semblance to the quality source material.

I'm speaking here as someone who has no knowledge of the source material, so I really don't know or care if they've taken liberties, but as for the other two, I don't see how this looks boring or generic. During Spider-man I had to sit through trailers for Jumanji, Justice League, Valerian, Pitch Perfect (???), and maybe a couple others I've forgotten; and this was the only trailer that felt like a breath of fresh air to me. I honestly think the words "boring" and "generic" could be applied to every other trailer they played.

 

[DarthSkywalker]

Did we watch the same trailer? I thought this looked far more intriguing and more fresh and original than most recent superhero movie trailers (aside from Marvel's, theirs are always great), of course that's pretty subjective. I really don't see the comparison to a superhero movie at all here, other than the fact that both fall into the action movie category. For what it's worth, my interest was peaked far more by the Dark Tower trailer than any Logan, Justice League, or Wonder Woman trailer.

They got a dude running around like he is Batman, jumping off rooftops, which his magic guns. He does this not like Indiana Jones, prone to hurt. But a superhero, barely damaged. Compare it to Gosling in the Blade Runner trailer. Its so superhero, it hurts.

But hey, tihs is the firs time I have read someone not liking the Logan trailers. Johnny Cash and all.

I'm speaking here as someone who has no knowledge of the source material, so I really don't know or care if they've taken liberties, but as for the other two, I don't see how this looks boring or generic. During Spider-man I had to sit through trailers for Jumanji, Justice League, Valerian, Pitch Perfect (???), and maybe a couple others I've forgotten; and this was the only trailer that felt like a breath of fresh air to me. I honestly think the words "boring" and "generic" could be applied to every other trailer they played.

If I never read one word, this would look awful to me. The trailer captures something amazing, considering the lead is clearly older. It looks like all the bad young adult movies that have been en vogue the last decade. It even has the blue filter. The arguments you are making were the same made for the Fantastic Four, Divergent, Power Rangers, and other similar movies that fall in this budget range, with the same basic look, with the same generic young adult feel going for them.

Though I am curious, what looks "fresh"?

And every trailer you just named, looked easily better then this movie to me. And I don't even like the trailers for Jumanji, JL or Pitch Perfect 3. Though I probably will see at least two of them in theaters. I am going nowhere near the Dark Tower.

 

[FunkMiller]

I am still waiting for The Gunslinger.

That, my friend, is an inexpensive, art house movie with a hard R rating, directed by somebody like John Hillcoat. You know, the kind of film that doesn't cost a lot, doesn't take 300 million, but is critically acclaimed, fascinating to the audience because of its weirdness and dreamlike quality, and serves as a springboard for future sequels.

But hey, Roland The Gunslinger Begins is also fine, I guess.

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

There are just times you know something is just not going to be what it should be. I wanted to stay somewhat optimistic, even as images started getting out, and became more and more clear they didn't know a thing about the Dark Tower.

But once the trailer hit, there was no running from what this is. A cheap movie, that does not resemble the Dark Tower outside a few basic images. All the nuance, all the character, all the important things are not there.

That, my friend, is an inexpensive, art house movie with a hard R rating, directed by somebody like John Hillcoat. You know, the kind of film that doesn't cost a lot, doesn't take 300 million, but is critically acclaimed, fascinating to the audience because of its weirdness and dreamlike quality, and serves as a springboard for future sequels.

But hey, Roland The Gunslinger Begins is also fine, I guess.

Couldn't agree with these 2 posts anymore. So disappointing.

 

[Symbiotic]

Official: Rated PG-13 for thematic material including sequences of gun violence and action.

 

[Grootster]

Honestly, I see this guy as more of an Indiana Jones-type than a superhero, at least if we're using the term superhero in the traditional sense like Captain America, Superman, or even Batman. He seems to lack the patriotism or strong moral-compass that defines the classic superhero. Of course, nowadays people like Star-Lord are considered superheroes, despite being a criminal without superpowers who doesn't even dress in a super-suit; the lines between 'superhero' and 'action hero' are kind of blurred these days, but I'd argue that this guy falls closer to the 'action hero' spectrum than the 'superhero'.

And I think that's what I find sort of fresh about it, it reminds me of an 80s action movie, with a hero shrouded in mystery (and not in a dumb JJ Abrams 'mystery box' way). Something tells me the movie isn't going to spoon-feed us the gunslinger's entire backstory, and that seems refreshing in a day and age where so many movies feel the need to tell us everything we never wanted to know about everyone. Of course I could be completely wrong when the movie comes out, but that's just the vibe I get from the trailer.

Official: Rated PG-13 for thematic material including sequences of gun violence and action.

I'm for it, I personally don't care for excessive violence and gore in movies, as well as excessive bad-language. I don't really watch R-rated stuff, and I don't think anything above PG-13 is necessary to make a grittier film, as movies like Indiana Jones, Rogue One, and even GOTG prove.

 

[DarthSkywalker]

Fury Road, with all the excessive violence, gore and bad language. Same for the Matrix and Baby Driver.

 

[harlequinade]

One complaint I keep hearing about this is that it looks like a superhero movie. Ummm, no. Most superhero movies these days actually look good.


This looks like a superhero movie... from 1993.

And even saying 1993 may be too generous here

 

[FunkMiller]

Honestly, I see this guy as more of an Indiana Jones-type than a superhero, at least if we're using the term superhero in the traditional sense like Captain America, Superman, or even Batman. He seems to lack the patriotism or strong moral-compass that defines the classic superhero. Of course, nowadays people like Star-Lord are considered superheroes, despite being a criminal without superpowers who doesn't even dress in a super-suit; the lines between 'superhero' and 'action hero' are kind of blurred these days, but I'd argue that this guy falls closer to the 'action hero' spectrum than the 'superhero'.

And I think that's what I find sort of fresh about it, it reminds me of an 80s action movie, with a hero shrouded in mystery (and not in a dumb JJ Abrams 'mystery box' way). Something tells me the movie isn't going to spoon-feed us the gunslinger's entire backstory, and that seems refreshing in a day and age where so many movies feel the need to tell us everything we never wanted to know about everyone. Of course I could be completely wrong when the movie comes out, but that's just the vibe I get from the trailer.

I'm for it, I personally don't care for excessive violence and gore in movies, as well as excessive bad-language. I don't really watch R-rated stuff, and I don't think anything above PG-13 is necessary to make a grittier film, as movies like Indiana Jones, Rogue One, and even GOTG prove.

You see Roland The Gunslinger as being like Indiana Jones? And you're fine with the movie being PG13?

I trust you haven't read the books?

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

Yeah, Roland is not, and should not, be like Indiana Jones!

 

[Rowsdower!]

Yeah. He's not an Indiana Jones type at all. But even if that's what they were going for here, they couldn't get that right either because they didn't even give him a hat, lol.

So what do you guys think the RT score for this trainwreck will be? I'm going to aim high and say 26%.

$16m opening weekend and it dies a quick death at the box office.

And in a few years, HBO or Starz will acquire the rights and give us the adaptation we deserve.

 

[FunkMiller]

so what do you guys think the rt score for this trainwreck will be? I'm going to aim high and say 26%.

.

19%

 

[Grootster]

Fury Road, with all the excessive violence, gore and bad language. Same for the Matrix and Baby Driver.

I haven't seen any of those, and I have no real desire to.

You see Roland The Gunslinger as being like Indiana Jones? And you're fine with the movie being PG13?

I trust you haven't read the books?

I'd never even heard of the Dark Tower books until the past few months, so I have no knowledge or connection to them. I do sympathize with people who want a proper adaptation, and I hope they get one some day.

So what do you guys think the RT score for this trainwreck will be? I'm going to aim high and say 26%.

I'll guess 64%