Stupid People Doing Stupid Things Thread

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

How BP Hilariously Locked Itself Into Billions in Oil Spill Payments

Last night, 60 Minutes aired a report on how BP is trying to get out of a contract that has forced the oil giant to pay billions in reparations stemming from the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, even to people who weren't directly affected by the disaster. The funny thing is that BP has no one to blame but itself.

After the oil spill, BP—as it scrambled to stem a PR disaster—entered into an agreement with lawyers representing Deepwater Horizon victims that said the company would pay money to any business owner in Alabama, Louisiana and Mississippi whose business suffered a loss in the year of the spill before rebounding the next year. The catch is this: a claimant doesn't have to prove that the business lost money because of the oil spill, only that it lost money during the covered time period.

This has led, by the company's own admission, to BP being used as an ATM by people whose businesses were not even remotely directly affected by the spill, if at all. And this wasn't tricky lawyering on the part of the plaintiffs' lawyers either: the 60 Minutes report makes clear that BP's lawyers were well aware of the language in the agreement, but didn't think that it would become a problem.

Now, though, it has definitely become a problem, so much so that BP sent its vice president to essentially cry on the lap of CBS' Scott Pelley. A court appointed mediator has stuck to a strict reading of the contract's language and has authorized billions of dollars in payments on behalf of BP, which is fighting (to no avail) in appellate court to have the deal struck down.

The oil company—which makes a chicken-and-egg argument about "proof" in the piece—says it will take its case to the Supreme Court if necessary. But in the meantime 60 Minutes is asking the type of question you would expect from a "balanced" news organization: "Are some Gulf Coast businesses exploiting BP?"

To which we reply: hopefully.

http://www.cbsnews.com/videos/bp-cries-foul-in-massive-oil-spill-settlement/

I don't even feel remotely sorry for these idiots, I hope every smart business owner in these states bleed them for every penny they can get

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Man Kills 11-Year-Old Nephew While Showing Off Gun's Laser Sight

A man accidentally shot and killed his 11-year-old nephew on Saturday as he demonstrated the laser sight on one of his guns by pointing it at the boy's head.

The boy, identified by WNEP as Hunter Pedersen, was visiting his grandfather's home in Delaware Township, New Jersey on Saturday when he asked his uncle, who lives in the home's basement with his son, to see his gun collection.

The uncle, 34-year-old Chad Olm, obliged and showed the boy and his son several weapons—all of which Olm claimed were unloaded—from his locked gun safe, including a .357, a .22 and a 9 mm. As he was showing Pedersen another a .40-caliber Glock 27, Olm decided to demonstrate the gun's laser sight.

"Look, you have a red dot on your forehead," Olm recalled one of the boys saying, according to court records obtained by the Pocono Record.

At that point, the 11-year-old reached for the gun, causing Olm to accidentally pull the trigger.

From the Pocono Record:

The gun went off.

The bullet struck the child in the forehead, above an eye. He began bleeding and fell over.

When police arrived, the child's body was found on the floor of the bedroom and there was a single bullet hole in the corner of the room, near the ceiling. The gun was on the clothes washer in the laundry room.

The victim's parents were not there at the time of the incident. They arrived after police.
Olm was arrested on charges of criminal homicide, recklessly endangering another person and endangering the welfare of children.

"It's horribly tragic. The family is devastated," Blooming Grove State Police station commander Lt. Chris Paris said. "It goes to show that the safe handling of firearms is a must. The family has lost something that they can never replace."

http://www.poconorecord.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20140504/NEWS/140509932

This is horrible, proper gun safety; never assume the chamber is clear until you check it yourself.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Anti-Gay Marriage GOP Candidate Was Drag Queen In Early '00s

A club owner in North Carolina has told the Winston-Salem Journal that Steve Wiles, an anti-gay marriage GOP senate candidate, was a drag queen working under the name Miss Mona Sinclair in the early 2000s.

Randy Duggins, the co-owner of Club Odyssey, said he recognized Wiles when a photo of the candidate appeared in the paper.

Wiles, who supports North Carolina's constitutional amendment against same-sex marriage, first denied having worked at the club, according to the Journal.
But a few weeks after the image came out, Wiles posted a lengthy apology on Facebook, at which he noted "My job was embarrassing—I had to have a job!" His full comments, via The Daily Mail, are below.

Wiles told Business Insider this weekend,

"I think that everyone has their own choices to make, and I'm fine with everyone making their own. For me, from a religious standpoint, just for my life, for me, it just was not something that I wanted to continue."
But when the interviewer asked if Wiles himself was gay, he vehemently denied the accusation. "No, no, I really won't make any comments on that," he said.

Steve Wiles p.k.a. Miss Mona Sinclair is running for state senate in a primary election on May 6.

http://www.businessinsider.com/anti...plains-his-past-as-a-drag-queen-2014-5#!IKmid

I'm totally against it, except for that time in my life I was totally down with it. Hypocrite

 

[Teelie]

This guy is a complete hypocrite, although not for being a drag queen (which is not synonomous with being homosexual despite the perception I believe) but for forcing his personal and religious beliefs on others using his office position to do so.

He wouldn't be saying that if someone else were running for office and wanting to enforce a totally different set of beliefs on himself and everyone else.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Man Expecting Minor Surgery Gets Accidental Vasectomy Instead

A man being treated for a minor urological problem woke from surgery to discover he'd been given a vasectomy instead.

Doctors at the Royal Liverpool Hospital have "apologized unreservedly" for the mistake, and are working to see if it's reversible.

According to the hospital, the man went into surgery for treatment for a minor urological disorder. Somewhere along the lines, though, the surgeon becomes confused and performed the operation on the "wrong site," as the Telegraph put it.

"We can confirm a patient who was scheduled to have a different minor urological procedure was wrongly given a vasectomy," Dr Peter Williams, the hospital's medical director, said in a statement. "We have apologized unreservedly to the patient and we are offering him our full support. We greatly regret the distress this has caused him... This is a serious incident and we are investigating this fully to understand why it occurred and how we can ensure it does not happen again."

The apology might not be enough, though; one lawyer told the Telegraph the mistake could cost the hospital as much as $170,000.

"In a worst-case scenario – sterility in a younger man with no children – the trust might be liable for a figure in excess of £100,000 in compensation," Ian Cohen, a clinical negligence lawyer at Slater & Gordon, said.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/h...minor-surgery-given-vasectomy-by-mistake.html

Seems like a pretty big screw up

 

[Teelie]

Man Expecting Minor Surgery Gets Accidental Vasectomy Instead

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/h...minor-surgery-given-vasectomy-by-mistake.html

Seems like a pretty big screw up

That's what she said.

Spoiler

 

[KevanG]

Anti-Gay Marriage GOP Candidate Was Drag Queen In Early '00s

http://www.businessinsider.com/anti...plains-his-past-as-a-drag-queen-2014-5#!IKmid

I'm totally against it, except for that time in my life I was totally down with it. Hypocrite

And that's what I'm talking about when I say people are being hypocrites when it comes to trying to force this issue. People talk about it being an offense to marriage and then they get caught with a hooker. People talk about it being a religious thing then it turns out they were all for it a few years back. I dare you to find anyone who isn't a hypocrite when it comes to things like this and I'm positive you'll be matched for every one with another who was a total hypocrite.

 

[Monsieur Xavier]

Man Kills 11-Year-Old Nephew While Showing Off Gun's Laser Sight

This is horrible, proper gun safety; never assume the chamber is clear until you check it yourself.

When I was doing my military service, one of the first things I was taught was to never point a weapon at someone "to play", even fake weapons ( ok well, maybe not water pistol ).

 

[Anubis]

Man Expecting Minor Surgery Gets Accidental Vasectomy Instead

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/h...minor-surgery-given-vasectomy-by-mistake.html

Seems like a pretty big screw up

Lucky bastard.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Lawmaker Is Pretty Sure You Didn't Get His Obamacare-Holocaust Analogy

Seriously, what don't you people get about comparing a government-regulated private-insurance-purchase program with subsidies for workers and the systematic imprisonment and extermination of Jewish humans with trains and ovens and gas chambers?

Via TPM:

The Tennessee lawmaker who compared Obamacare's individual mandate to Nazis deporting Jews to concentration camps thinks his critics missed the point.

State Sen. Stacey Campfield (R) caused a stir Monday morning when he wrote on his personal blog that "Democrats bragging about the number of mandatory sign ups for Obamacare is like Germans bragging about the number of manditory sign ups for 'train rides' for Jews in the 40s."

In a follow-up post on his blog, Campfield wrote later Monday that his intentions were misconstrued.

"I regret that some people miss the point of my post. It was not to offend. It was to warn," he explained. "To draw attention to Obamacare and the slippery slope that I see occurring in the lives of myself, my constituents, and the rest of the country with the continued taking of freedom by the federal government."
Campfield added that he didn't mean to offend anybody, only "to draw attention to the loss of freedom that we are currently experiencing."

Have mercy on poor Campfield. I mean, it's not like he said the Holocaust didn't happen. Given the opprobrium he's facing, he must totally understand how the Jews felt now. Hopefully this whole unfortunate misunderstanding will blow over faster than when he blamed AIDS on one gay "guy screwing a monkey—if I recall correctly—and then having sex with men. It was an airline pilot, if I recall."

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/stacey-campbell-obamacare-holocaust-elaboration

How do people like this get elected?

 

[Teelie]

Because people don't give a **** anymore and will elect any jackass to office.

 

[Anubis]

Or rather they don't give a s**t anymore and don't vote and the only people that do vote are crazy A-holes like the guy they elected.

 

[Teelie]

I've voted in the past but sometimes it seems like it's pointless. And there are times where your choices are bad or worse. It's a dysfunction of the system that we get fewer and fewer people who are worth voting for.

 

[Anubis]

Basically.

 

[KevanG]

That guy is a moron. Unless it's genocide then comparing anything else to the holocaust is a bad move and guaranteed to get people mad at you.

People tell me I can't complain if I don't vote. If I do vote and the guy doesn't get in they tell me too bad and suck it up. I can't win either way as I try to vote for those making sense. They never get elected.

 

[Hal_Jordan]

How do people like this get elected?

Because the people who vote for guys like this actually believe things like this and that Obama is the devil and the end is nigh.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

U.S. Vet Jailed for Taking Guns to Mexico Says He Just Missed His Exit

A former combat Marine says he shouldn't be languishing in a Tijuana jail for crossing the Mexican border with three guns, because it was all a mistake: He was heading for a night out with his buddies in California, missed the last highway exit, and ended up Mexico-bound.

Via Stars and Stripes:

Sgt. Andrew Tahmooressi, 25, said he was headed to dinner in San Ysidro on March 31 when he mistakenly wound up at a border crossing point in Tijuana, U-T San Diego reported Sunday.

"I was going to call them after I drove off the exit, but I never got off the exit, I blew right past it," he told the newspaper in an interview from jail. "I wasn't paying attention, thinking I had way farther to go. I ended up in Mexico with no way to turn around."
Agents at the border found three guns in the vehicle, which he'd just driven from Florida to California to make a "new start," he said. The four-year Marine vet—who served twice in Afghanistan, where the photo above was taken—is being held without bail and faces up to 21 years in a Mexican prison.

U.S. officials are trying to get him released, but Tahmooressi might not be able to wait, judging from this detail:

After he was jailed, Tahmooressi tried to escape by climbing over a gate and heading up onto a roof, and then onto another one. He gave up when a guard opened fire, but the incident earned him the nickname "Spider-Man."
Semper fi, Spider-Man. Semper fi.

http://www.stripes.com/news/us/jailed-marine-veteran-says-he-missed-exit-hit-mexico-1.281580

Nothing says "I'm innocent" like trying to escape from a Mexican prison. Can't say I blame him though, I've heard some horror stories about them

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Drunk Woman Busted Having Sex on Flight that her Parents Were Also On

There's a definite limit to what you can get away with in the sky, even on a Virgin Atlantic flight. One intoxicated woman learned that the hard way this weekend.

According to the Sun, a British woman in her twenties was on a flight to Las Vegas with her parents when she decided to it would be a good idea to join her seatmate in the restroom.

"They went to the bathroom and people could hear loud noises," a passenger from the plane told the Sun. "The cabin crew forced the door open. Then she really kicked off, screaming drunken abuse. She was shackled to her seat."
A spokesperson told reporters the airline doesn't tolerate "disruptive passengers."

Las Vegas police detained and questioned the woman when the flight landed, but eventually released her with a warning and a lifetime of incredibly uncomfortable family dinners.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepag...on-virgin-flight-on-holiday-with-parents.html

Everyone wants to get into that mile high club

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

California High School Wants Teens to Cancel NFL-Style "Prom Draft"

Last year, a Southern California high school has started an unofficial tradition of selecting dates to the prom through an NFL-style draft, where the boys rank the girls—allegedly in order of hotness—and then draft their dates. This year, the school's administration has called for it to stop.

Kathy Scott, principal of Newport Beach's Corona del Mar High, sent parents a letter about the prom draft over the weekend, strongly discouraging students from participating. Because it was never a school-sanctioned practice, administrators can't actually prevent it from happening, and they apparently haven't threatened to cancel prom outright.

The draft is apparently a total meat market, with money changing hands to buy higher picks. According to the Daily Pilot, one junior spent $140 on a pick so he could go with a girl he barely knew.

"It's awkward because he spent a large amount of money to go with someone he doesn't talk to," the student said. "And she finds it awkward that he chose her."

Despite results like this, one student told the Pilot that "A lot of the girls respect the draft and stick with those dates."

Some female students were upset with last year's draft but "only because junior boys were asking out sophomores instead."

The prom draft shouldn't be shocking, though, considering the high school culture in Newport Beach. In the past five years, Corona del Mar has been sued by the ACLU over its "racist and homophobic" atmosphere, cancelled a production of Rent until public pressure got it reinstated, and faced a major cheating scandal.

"There's definitely issues at that school with certain students feeling entitled," Jane Garland, the school district's head of discipline until last year, told the Pilot.

"The culture in Newport Beach is ridiculous, and CdM personifies it."

Corona Del Mar's prom is June 6.

http://www.dailypilot.com/news/la-me-0507-prom-draft-20140506,0,6471818.story

I find this humorous

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Man Busted Going Down on Woman on Church Lawn During Wedding

As a couple was getting married Saturday in a Catholic church in Salt Lake City, a second couple was allegedly busy having sex on the church's lawn. Specifically, police say they caught the man with "his tongue and finger inside of [the woman's] vagina."

When a wedding goer spotted Sandra Kruser and Wilson Benally mid-oral sex, the guest was so distraught she "ran into the road to stop" a passing police officer. Officer Rich Stone pulled over and walked to the churn lawn, where he approached the couple.

"I walked over to the couple and I physically saw the sex act," Stone reported, adding that Benally "had his tongue and finger inside of Ms. Krusen's vagina."

Stone told the couple to stop but they refused. Eventually, Stone had to pull them apart.

At least four children from the wedding party spotted the sex act, according to Stone's report.

Kruser and Benally were arrested for gross lewdness and public intoxication; Benally was also charged with criminal trespass. Both are being held on bond.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/sex-on-church-lawn-576432

Romance isn't dead ladies

 

[KevanG]

I don't know what to say about that.

 

[Teelie]

California High School Wants Teens to Cancel NFL-Style "Prom Draft"

The prom draft shouldn't be shocking, though, considering the high school culture in Newport Beach.

http://www.dailypilot.com/news/la-me-0507-prom-draft-20140506,0,6471818.story

I find this humorous

That struck through part is redundant. This is not surprising to anyone who attended a high school where football is a big thing.

What I will find surprising is if any football parents do not dismiss it as "boys will be boys."

 

[Teelie]

Man Busted Going Down on Woman on Church Lawn During Wedding

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/sex-on-church-lawn-576432

Romance isn't dead ladies

Every joke I can think of about this is totally tasteless, much like this couple was.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

No One Will Ever Play a Worse Round of Family Feud Than This

[YT]HT7-k_PLKh8[/YT]

This family needed 200 points to win the final "fast money" round of Family Feud, and their patriarch (played by Jeffrey Tambor?) effortlessly scored 182 of them. All his daughter needed to do was finish the job with 18 more.

She didn't do it. She didn't even come close. In fact, it's fortunate for her that it is impossible to score negative points on Family Feud.

Watch her dad's face during this sequence: He looks like his stomach is about to throw up.

Gotta make sure to bring the smart family members with ya

 

[Hotwire]

Man Busted Going Down on Woman on Church Lawn During Wedding

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/sex-on-church-lawn-576432

Romance isn't dead ladies