And I agree with you that is why Ben Reilly, Spider-Girl, and BND failed. I didn't read most of Ben Reilly's run as "Spider-Man" or when he was the Scarlet Spider. I have only bought one issue of BND (ASM#600, anniversary issue and all), but skimmed the first few issues in a TPB in a bookstore and didn't care with the direction--though I still get sick a little bit when I think of OMD.
All that said, I was wrong about Spider-Girl. I bought them on a whim because of a cheap deal. And they're fantastic. Yeah, Mayday is not Peter Parker. But I can read it and see the Peter Parker I remember before Sins Past, The Other, Civil War, Back in Black, and ultimately One More Day, twisted him into something he wasn't. It was a continuation of the classic Peter Parker. So, if Marvel is compelled to remain in this OMD/BND bastardization where Spidey is increasingly beginning to look like a spandexed version of Archie Andrews....then I can live with Spider-Girl being the conclusion to the character that is little more than a Mickey Mouse logo now in his own books.