The Official Life Lesson's Thread

[sonstar]

good point dude :P u really should be waking up next to people you want to wake up next too haha

 

[Sean Adisano]

never drink pickle juice

 

[heypapajinx]

never drink pickle juice

that's right!!!
why drink it when you can make popiscles out of it!!!t:
100% delicious

 

[Sean Adisano]

that's right!!!
why drink it when you can make popiscles out of it!!!t:
100% delicious

makes me sad ...and very very sick

 

[heypapajinx]

The notion that alcohol unleashes the "real you" is ******ed.

The "real" me can walk a straight line.
The "real" me can remember what I started talking about 3 minutes ago.
The "real" me has woken up next to chicks that I would never want to sleep with in a million years.

Alcohol doesn't reveal the real you.
It reveals a ******ed, cave man, base, impaired VERSION of the "real" you.

haaaha!
yeah. if it "realeases" the real you, then there would be a LOT of people out there having to explain why the real them just PURPOSELY cheated on their whatever...

 

[Lord Valumart]

never send men to do the shopping

 

[Sean Adisano]

don't imitate the show jackass...it hurts

 

[sonstar]

never ask a man to do anything involving cleaning fetching or cooking...

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrr

 

[heypapajinx]

t:
if you notice skid marks on his skibbys during the peeling off of clothes, stop there.
if he can't be bothered to wipe his own arse, just think what else he will overlook.

 

[sonstar]

t:
if you notice skid marks on his skibbys during the peeling off of clothes, stop there.
if he can't be bothered to wipe his own arse, just think what else he will overlook.

LOL thats the funniest thing ive heard for a long time

 

[Sean Adisano]

never volunteer to watch your baby nephew alone...

yea he was fun to pay with and feed and put to sleep...but i forgot about the changing part

 

[Kyalesyin]

People don 't appreciate you chewing on their prosthetic hand when they take it off. [I was about three at the time]

 

[Mee]

Lawl.

 

[Kyalesyin]

I still maintain that he should have asked for it to be put behind the bar, out of my reach.

 

[BRUTAL]

Beer & Whiskey do not mix... ever.

 

[Sean Adisano]

never assume a women is pregnant...NEVER!

once you ask the question, "oh, i didn't know you were pregnant. so whens the baby due?", theres no recovery for when they say, "i'm not pregnant."

just walk away.

 

[GoldenAgeHero]

never assume a women is pregnant...NEVER!

once you ask the question, "oh, i didn't know you were pregnant. so whens the baby due?", theres no recovery for when they say, "i'm not pregnant."

just walk away.

lmao that happened to me once. my cousins wife mentioned she was pregnant, and im like you're pregnant?! and she looked at me said what?! you thought i was fat?! i was "like oh ****!"

 

[Sean Adisano]

lmao that happened to me once. my cousins wife mentioned she was pregnant, and im like you're pregnant?! and she looked at me said what?! you thought i was fat?! i was "like oh ****!"

\

lol, well thats a little different, you can actually playoff with that one because they really are pregnant, plus it was family. always an advantage when family.

but telling a women who's not pregnant that you didn't know she was, when she's not, and not family, not even a friend, just an accuintance, or knowing each other on first name basis...then you have a problem...believe me

 

[Hades]

I've learned that life sucks

I'm going to quit when I'm ahead.

 

[Muze]

i have two New Years lessons that pretty much work any other time, as well.


1. if you fall asleep at the bar, you will get thrown out.


2. if you get approached at a bar by an overly eager woman who is only in town for one night, keeps buying you drinks, and is very adamant about you returning to a hotel with her, just politely refuse (especially if she's wearing a wedding ring).

 

[Sean Adisano]

i have two New Years lessons that pretty much work any other time, as well.


1. if you fall asleep at the bar, you will get thrown out.


2. if you get approached at a bar by an overly eager woman who is only in town for one night, keeps buying you drinks, and is very adamant about you returning to a hotel with her, just politely refuse (especially if she's wearing a wedding ring).

i got to know what happened!?!?!?

 

[Muze]

i got to know what happened!?!?!?

lol. i phrased it to sound like something horrible happened but i'm actually talking about two different New Years. two years back, i pulled a double at work and ended up falling asleep due to a combination of lack of sleep and lack of non-alcoholic fluid in my body. they threw me out in the snow; never went back to that bar. anyways, this past New Years i got groped by some married lady while her creepy husband watched from a distance. i was intoxicated but not drunk enough to suddenly become a swinger. it sucks because she was really hot. but it doesn't suck because i could have gotten raped or woken up missing an organ or two. i'm kind of wondering if they found anyone else after i bolted.

 

[Sean Adisano]

lol. i phrased it to sound like something horrible happened but i'm actually talking about two different New Years. two years back, i pulled a double at work and ended up falling asleep due to a combination of lack of sleep and lack of non-alcoholic fluid in my body. they threw me out in the snow; never went back to that bar. anyways, this past New Years i got groped by some married lady while her creepy husband watched from a distance. i was intoxicated but not drunk enough to suddenly become a swinger. it sucks because she was really hot. but it doesn't suck because i could have gotten raped or woken up missing an organ or two. i'm kind of wondering if they found anyone else after i bolted.

hmmm creepy husband watching his ****ty wife grope someone else...yea i bolt too

 

[Sean Adisano]

always put on sunblock

and putting it on and immediately going in the water and coming out doesn't count of still having it on

 

[Superman79]

1) Women, deep down, are heartless devils
2) Despite #1, we will never stop pursuing them
3) Bitterness is a very powerful thing
4) Faith can be rewarded if you are patient
5) Never say never