The Random Quotes Thread

[hippie_hunter]

In this thread you shall post any old random quote from anything you have heard in your lifetime such as:

"Me and the cows are friends."

"But if we recycle, the enviromentalists win!"

"Whats the point of leaving America if you gonna end up in America Jr."

 

[hippie_hunter]

"Batman Forever and Batman & Robin weren't movies, they were just extended ads for Hasbro toys."

"You can't rape the willing"

"Life's a ***** then you die"

 

[Ruben Studdard]

"I can smell your ****"

 

[sylvia plath]

"When I die, I want to die like my grandmother, peacefully and in her sleep. Not like the screaming passengers in her car."

 

[Hobgoblin]

"Dont p*** down my back and tell me its raining!"

"The movie sucked ass, and the show ass sucks! -Kevins mom"

 

[Sarge]

"You get the dvd 'Pretty Babies' which I assume is about babies...."

 

[Alf]

Originally posted by sylvia plath
"When I die, I want to die like my grandmother, peacefully and in her sleep. Not like the screaming passengers in her car."

hahahahah

 

[Phoney Bone]

"Dear McGuyver. He's a straw, a rubber band, and a paper clip. Save my dog."

"QUICK, NERDS! To the erection cave!"

"Do your ears hang low?"
"No but my grama's boobs do."

 

[Ruben Studdard]

"Not counting relatives or the elderly, approximately 85-90% of the women I know I either will f**k, have f**ked, or am currently f**king"

-Rodney Jones, 1995, Virginia State Univ.

 

[Svlatislav]

"'Ere! I'm still bloody ambulatory!"

 

[redmarvel]

"I'm not bad... I'm just drawn that way" - Who Framed Roger Rabbit

 

[C. Lee]

It's times like these I thank God I'm an athiest. - Michael "Meathead" Stivic on "All in the Family"

 

[redmarvel]

JAKE: "I ran out of gas! I had a flat tire! I didn't have enough money for cab fare! My tux didn't come back from the cleaners! An old friend came in from out of town! Someone stole my car! There was an earthquake! A terrible flood! Locusts! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!" - The Blues Brothers

 

[Dorian Gray]

Spike: I've been alive longer than you and dead longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine. I've done things I prefered you didn't. I've never had a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood, which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain. So I make a lot of mistakes, a lot of bloody calls. A hundred plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of... you. I'm not asking you for anything when I say I love you. It's not because I want you, or can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity what you are. You're a hell of a women. You're the one Buffy. - Buffy The Vampire Slayer: Touched

 

[Knightsaber Priss]

"My theater will probably never show the 50th Anniversary Godzilla movie on a screen near me. " - Me

 

[redmarvel]

What are the benefits of writing to people via e-mail?

It's quicker, easier and involves less licking.

- Douglas Adams
The Salmon of Doubt

 

[Alexia Dark]

Spike: I've been alive longer than you and dead longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine. I've done things I prefered you didn't. I've never had a reputation for being a thinker. I follow my blood, which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain. So I make a lot of mistakes, a lot of bloody calls. A hundred plus years and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of... you. I'm not asking you for anything when I say I love you. It's not because I want you, or can't have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity what you are. You're a hell of a women. You're the one Buffy. - Buffy The Vampire Slayer: Touched

Spike said that? Wow. That doesn't sound like him at all. I've really been missing something.

 

[Edd Extraordinaire]

Homer: THE GUY I REALLY HATE IS YOUUUR FATHER.

 

[Edd Extraordinaire]

Will Farrell: HEY! NOT ON MY WATCH! NOT ON MY WATCH! NO PERSONAL PHONE CALLS! I SHOULD SLAP YOU IN THE MOUTH : SLAP: USE THE COMPANY TIME TO TALK TO YOUR DISGUSTING ****E FRIENDS, NO!

 

[smeagol4prez]

"Peace, love and harmony are the finer things in life"

"Peace not war"

"Go Go Vegans!"

"Have you hugged your hippie today"

 

[Edd Extraordinaire]

Will Farrell: YOU DO NOT HAND IN CRAP LIKE THIS! THIS LOOKS LIKE YOU TOOK A CRAP OR A DUMP IN THE PRINTER! YOU ARE SCUM! I SHOULD FIRE YOU AND BURN DOWN YOUR FRIGGIN HOUSE! I'M THIS CLOSE TO RAPING YOU!

 

[Edd Extraordinaire]

Neil Diamond: It gets lonely on the road....that's why I love pornography.

 

[Sava]

"your more useless than a cock flavoured lolly pop"

 

[Edd Extraordinaire]

Robert Ghoulet: Dabadee dabadabadoooo....YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH......GHOULET.

 

[Agent Thermal]

"YOU ATE WEIRD AL'S AUTOGRAPH!!!" - Me (long story...)

"Golf is the only game where you yell 'fore,' shoot six, and write down five." - Golfer's Digest (I don't read that magazine or play golf, but I read that quote one day and haven't forgotten it since...)

"I'll procrastinate later." - Me

"Instead of taking care of the car IN advance, you had to take care of the car AT Advance!!!" - Me

(Yes, I enjoy quoting myself...doesn't mean they're any good. )