Three Lounges Outside Ebbing, Missouri

[KRYPTON INC.]

I just read the most KRYPTON post ever.

Spill... Where was it? Politics?

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

If there are no thick-bodied Latinas, I'm gonna have to name you a liar, sir.

So... Many... Bannable... Images... Must... Resist... Urge... To... Post...

 

[Reek]

Yeah, lol "but again... you knew that"

 

[Perfect Cell]

It's the instinct closest to the surface that reveals one's true self.

 

[Perfect Cell]

That post had a theme though. That's how you win high school essay contests. Someone owes KRYPTON a $20 gift card from Best Buy.

 

[Reek]

i wonder what he'd do with that card

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

Yeah, lol "but again... you knew that"

That one was a response that just totally got out of control. I intended it to be quick but Jeebus... I just kept going.

I do have a problem though. I am WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too smug sometimes on here. I think I can guarantee that 95% of the people that don't like me on the Hype if they met me in real life would like the hell out of me.

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That came off smug too, didn't it? Damn it!!

It's the instinct closest to the surface that reveals one's true self.

So... I'm some sort of juicy booty loving creature that also feeds on silicon breasts and weed?

Fair enough.

That post had a theme though. That's how you win high school essay contests. Someone owes KRYPTON a $20 gift card from Best Buy.

They give out gift cards in high school now? Where was this when I was younger?

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

i wonder what he'd do with that card

Find some way to leverage it for thick Latina booty.

There's gotta be an angle. There just has too!

 

[Reek]

lol... like cards existed back then

 

[Perfect Cell]

To be fair, I once won a gift certificate from Sam the Record Man (a Canadian music chain). I misplaced it almost immediately after winning, since it's a goddamn piece of paper. So, I didn't spend it right a way, and then Sam closed. This is how you learn the meaning of true loss.

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

lol... like cards existed back then

We'd use animal bones or antlers, collect them and trade them in for rentals at Blockbuster or West Coast Video.

Did I mention this was rural Poconos, Pa. in the 90's?

To be fair, I once won a gift certificate from Sam the Record Man (a Canadian music chain). I misplaced it almost immediately after winning, since it's a goddamn piece of paper. So, I didn't spend it right a way, and then Sam closed. This is how you learn the meaning of true loss.

 

[Perfect Cell]

There is still a goddamn rental store here. It's a Family Video. Is it the only chain that survived the mass extinction? Why does it exist? WHOM DOES IT SERVE?

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

There is still a goddamn rental store here. It's a Family Video. Is it the only chain that survived the mass extinction? Why does it exist? WHOM DOES IT SERVE?

Those that have the bad luck to stumble upon one and foolishly go inside become a member of... "The Family".

Spoiler

Forgive the pixels.

 

[Perfect Cell]

No one ever really thought the name "windbreaker" through, did they?

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

No one ever really thought the name "windbreaker" through, did they?

Dude... Post count is gonna be 5,500... Make the next one count.

(Please post Latin Booty... Please post Latin Booty... Please post Latin Booty...)

 

[Perfect Cell]

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Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

A wise man once said...

It's the instinct closest to the surface that reveals one's true self.

So... What does THIS reveal?

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..

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

Spoiler

I'll tell you what it reveals:

Spoiler

 

[Reek]

my moms birthday is on groundhog day. i need to get her something but she always pulls that "i dont want anything" ********.... I am thinking about some top notch chocolate... i dont know where to look cause I am good with a milky way.

 

[Perfect Cell]

And they're watching us (watching us), they're wat---ching us as we all fly awaaayaaayay

 

[Perfect Cell]

I tried a Google search for "high end chocolate" and it popped up Dairy Queen in the second result. So... ice cream cake?

 

[Perfect Cell]

A better answer, less formed by idiocy, would be Godiva. That seems like the go-to brand. There's this: http://www.godiva.com/happy-birthday-chocolate-gift-set/191627.html

If you want to spend more, there are higher options available. Like truffles. People like truffles, I think.

 

[Reek]

.....


So going to dairy queen... **** you mom!

 

[flickchick85]

The Godiva place I went to in San Francisco made Godiva crepes. Obviously, they are fancy.

 

[KRYPTON INC.]

my moms birthday is on groundhog day. i need to get her something but she always pulls that "i dont want anything" ********.... I am thinking about some top notch chocolate... i dont know where to look cause I am good with a milky way.

https://marich.com/product-tag/gift/

 

[Perfect Cell]

Robin eggs? You sick bastard. They are the bringer of Spring and renewal!