Untitled Mag: "James Bond sucks" Here's why

[Two-Face]

Thursday 14 September 06


James Bond Sucks!
"James Bond Sucks and that’s official. I have never been able to understand what anybody sees in these movies, ok maybe you could watch one, or even two but then when it becomes so blatantly obvious that each movie is just the same story substituted with different characters and locations then each one just becomes so bloody boring.

Its pretty much a quick exciting opening followed by some evil individual with plans for world domination who steals a nuclear bomb and holds the world to ransom. James Bond simply has to sleep with a couple of attractive women before finding his leading lady for this particular epic, fight off the chief bad guy’s henchman and then dispose of the bad guy himself. Throw in a big theme tune and some generally piss poor effects and bad gags and you have the latest flick.

So for each and every Bond movie, you take the above formula and there you go. Instant two hours drivel and more often than not instant box office success. How does this happen? Why does this happen? I’m willing to admit as a youngster, I liked a couple of movies – but only briefly… And now as a mature adult that I can see that each film is just a retread of the last, I cannot see the attraction. I’ve sat through them all over the years on various occasions and numerous individuals – my parents, family, friends have all tried to convince me of their quality but I’m sorry they just ain’t that good. I will always have a soft spot for Live & Let Die, maybe even the Spy Who Loved Me but some of them are just plain awful. Die Another Day wasn’t just a bloody terrible Bond film; it was a bloody terrible film.

Why are these films watched? Why is who’s the best Bond discussed? Why is it such big news who the next bloody James Bond is? Why are these films on every bank holiday and Christmas break… Bank holiday wouldn’t be the same without Bond – No, you’re right it might be good if there was a decent film on!"




















If you don't agree with that or you do agree with it, don't just sit there, give us your comments below. Speak your mind, you'll feel better for it - trust us.

http://www.untitledmagazine.co.uk/jamesbondsucks.php


Some Bond films does suck but not all of them!

 

[Agentsands77]

Bond is great because, like it or not, Bond films aren't all the same. There's a lot of variety in the treatment of the character. And his summary of the Bond franchise seems to not acknowledge that a lot of the films are remarkably different - DR. NO, FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE and YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE, for instance.

Sure, there has gotten a lot of same-ness in the franchise since the Roger Moore days, but before that (and even after that, on occaision), there was definitely a good amount of a variety. And now CASINO ROYALE is giving us even more variety.

 

[Two-Face]

I agree Agentstands77 Without Fleming's BOND there wouldn't be any spy movies and TVshows BOND is great.

Men want to be 007 and women want to fall in love with him. I would love to be in Bond's shoes.

 

[SpyderDan]

Sounds like some jealous 12-year-old wrote it.

 

[OddBob]

Well, Untitled Magazine, I think you suck. Neener.

 

[James"007"Bond]

Its taken that dude who wrote that lame article his entire life to conclude he doesn't like the Bond movies after watching all of them. He just doesn't understand the concept of Bond plain and simple. I cant even get mad at the guy because he just doesn't know and I'm sure there are better people than me tht can explain it to him.

 

[Fried Gold]

Some Bond films does suck but not all of them!

Your grammar is worse.

 

[ROBOCOP CPU001]

^

So is your manners.

 

[Fried Gold]

^

So is your manners.

So are your manners.

 

[M.E.H.Z.E.B]

So are your manners.

So, you're our new english teacher?

 

[Two-Face]

Your grammar is worse.

Why did you have to go off topic? I don't care give a damn long as posters understand me and this is a message board not a classroom

 

[ROBOCOP CPU001]

So, you're our new english teacher?

would appear so..

i hate teachers!

 

[Fried Gold]

I don't care give a damn

LOL

 

[M.E.H.Z.E.B]

LOL

*Typical*

 

[Avangarde]

Crazy people

 

[Kevin Roegele]

Thursday 14 September 06


James Bond Sucks!
"James Bond Sucks and that’s official. I have never been able to understand what anybody sees in these movies, ok maybe you could watch one, or even two but then when it becomes so blatantly obvious that each movie is just the same story substituted with different characters and locations then each one just becomes so bloody boring.

Its pretty much a quick exciting opening followed by some evil individual with plans for world domination who steals a nuclear bomb and holds the world to ransom.

This guy is complaining about the sterotypical, public view of Bond in general, rather than the actual films. Their are very few films in which the villains strive for world domination, or in which 007 saves the world, but that's the usual way people think of Bond. It's mainly You Only Live Twice, The Spy Who Loved Me and Moonraker - and the Austin Powers films - that this guy is getting annoyed about. Stealing a nuke is Thunderball.

 

[Mentok]

Why do people watch Bond films? Its escapeism. Thats why people watch the films.

 

[Cinemaman]

As I think, in some ways JB movies (except first movies with Connery) suck.

That's my honest opinion. They all have the same formula without any differences and I hate this.

But I think this time CR will show us the real JB movie.

 

[moonraker]

Saying Bond sucks just because the series has a similar formula is just stupid. Come on now almost every action, romance comedy, horror, and war movie have the same formula.

People don't watch movies to see a new "formula". The whole point of watching movies is to see HOW Bond wins, or HOW America beats the Nazi's, or HOW The guy will get the girl.

The whole fun of watching movies, is the journey and character developement.

 

[spidekick]

hola amigos. last i participated in here was 2005, whew.
well, i just like to say that i liked watching the bond films because of the cool gadgets and bond's suave style.
it's really just now that i realized that true spies are far from what it's depicted in bond films. they're not debonaire, they don't always get away free when their cover's busted, and they don't always get to sleep with supermodels (whether friend or foe) ha ha ha.
it's just cool watching these movies and i just take them for what they are, entertainment.
yah it could be true that plot lines are just regurgitated... but you know why they're watched again and again? let's put it ths way, why do guys *********e again and again?
on another note, when i saw craig's profile, really the first thing that entered my mind was a UFC fight.
so there...