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You know you're drunk when...

You know you are drunk when you try to make a bacon, pizza, chicken nugget, marshmallow sandwich...with flip flops.
 
You know you're drunk when you start air drumming to "November Rain", spill your beer, and then attempt to sweep spilt the beer under your chair with your feet because you momentarily forgot that beer is in fact a liquid.
 
You know you're drunk when looking at that old lady with no teeth starts to give you ideas.
 
You know you're drunk when picturing Ace with no teeth starts to give you ideas.
 
You know you're drunk when you consider making Knowsbleeds idea into reality.
 
You know when you're drunk when Nickelback starts to sound good.
 
You know you're drunk and tripping on acid when Ace starts to sparkle and you get scared and you run away and he catches you and you both fly away and you eat and you get really fat and you regurgitate and you feel better again.
 
You know you're drunk when, you're talking to the cops and your pockets are all filled with booze that you shouldn't have on you and the reason you're talking to the cops is just to have a conversation and has nothing to do with you being in trouble.

Thats that 'dont give a ****' juice. Nice.

Have no idea why the thought of talking to cops gets more appealing the more drunk you are.
 
If you a Lions fan,,when you finish a detroit lions thanksgiving game,,, try to watch it sober I dare you.
 
You know you're drunk when your foot goes through a wall without even trying...
 
You know you're drunk when you grab an exposed wire, get electrocuted, can't feel your hand anymore and think to yourself, "this would be a great time to *********e".
 
You know you're drunk when you think you're doing "the stranger" to yourself but it turns out to be a leprosy infested miscreant.
 
you know your drunk when you decide that your 2nd cousin is better then nothing!! And Legal in some states!
 

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