Damn it.
I was really, REALLY hoping to see two winless teams this year. But of course, that can't happen because wouldn't you know it, Jacksonville had to play the Titans (who ALWAYS find a way to lose to the worst team in the league... seriously, this is actually true) and Tampa managed to face the ONE team in the league (or at least in Florida) that is a bigger dumpster fire than they are right now.
I guess the former match-up shouldn't be that much of a surprise, since after all, the Titans and the Jags are in the same division, so there's always a good chance that Tennessee will sh** the bed in at least one of those games. But the latter... what are the odds that the last winless team would just happen to face a team whose O-Line (already the worst in the NFL in terms of giving up sacks) would be suddenly short two players and the whole team would be caught in a PR sh**storm? Damn it, couldn't the Bucs just face the Saints and the Broncos every week for the rest of the season so I can see the Schiano Men get outscored 5,783 to 16? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!!!
And now, to make matters worse, for the next week or so, I'll probably be treated to the brilliant "insights" of multiple NFL analysts on ESPN and NFLN as they debate whether we were "wrong" about Greg Schiano's coaching style, and how maybe he isn't a frontrunner for Biggest A**hole in the Universe. Good God, they'll probably show Mike Glennon highlights. And of course, I will watch all of it, because just like 99% of Americans, I've been brainwashed by the NFL too.