Best excuses to call out of work with?

[Jennifer Walters]

We all have those days where we just need a day off. What's your best excuse to get out of work with?

 

[Go Web Go!]

Nothing works for me. I have family at the head of the company. They know what I'm doing at all times.

 

[Gilpesh]

If you're a woman, the best way to get out of work is "lady problems".

If you're a man, the best way to get out of work is "lady problems".

 

[Wiseman]

I called in to work one day saying I hurt my back from carrying everyone else on my shoulders.

 

[Spidey-Bat]

I fractured my testicle.

 

[Kane52630]

i used the "i have to babysit my little brother/sister and my parents are out" excuse or "i had food poison from the other night"

 

[Jennifer Walters]

I've used the ''I slipped on some ice and hurt my back pretty bad." as an excuse.

 

[Go Web Go!]

I fractured my testicle.

Anal fissures is also a good one.

 

[bullets]

family emergency

 

[enterthemadness]

Have a bunch right here.

1. I got laid last night.
2. Lost my virginity last night, tell everybody at work for me, boss.
3. My wrist hurts. Gonna go to the batting cages and fix it batting around for 2 hours. K?
4. I'm with your wife. Sorry.
5. I stayed up all night and am too tired to come in. Video games, eh?

 

[enterthemadness]

I called in to work one day saying I hurt my back from carrying everyone else on my shoulders.

nice one.

I fractured my testicle.

that almost hurt reading it.

 

[Nirvana]

Either I'm having a "family emergency" or I have an "appointment that I can't reschedule" and the next time I'm at work I'll just make some bull**** story up.

 

[Tyrinus]

Seriously, do you really think you need detailed excuses? Call in, say your sick, and that you aren't coming in.

 

[Kane52630]

Seriously, do you really think you need detailed excuses? Call in, say your sick, and that you aren't coming in.

ahh, use the Office Space method
nice one

 

[Metamorpho1977]

death in the family always works. all you gotta do is find an obituary with someone with your last name and bam, day off. Plus some companies offer grievance pay so you get paid for it too.

 

[Jennifer Walters]

I work at grocery store, I've so thought of calling in one day with a ''Sprained or pulled arm." or something.

 

[Majic Walrus]

Seriously, do you really think you need detailed excuses? Call in, say your sick, and that you aren't coming in.

This. Vauge enough to never need proof but serious enough not to need to come in. I promise you that if you call in regularly no matter how great an excuse is someone is going to want proof or they're going to fire you.

 

[Agent Z]

I always use the "I'm just not feeling you guys or that place at the moment. Maybe tomorrow. Bye."

 

[black_dust]

I called in work once and said i couldnt move my fingers, next day when they asked me if i am ok, i said the doctor said if it persists i will need to have it operated on.

Seemed to work

 

[ComicChick]

i called out today. said i wasn't feeling well. and i really wasn't, but i wasn't feeling so bad i was incapable of working.

i'm not off til next saturday, and have been off one day since may 24-ish. i just need some me time

 

[Zephyr Alexian]

death in the family always works. all you gotta do is find an obituary with someone with your last name and bam, day off. Plus some companies offer grievance pay so you get paid for it too.

It never fails. Death is like 'The Untouchables' of work excuses. No questions. Just time off.

 

[The Guard]

"I'm sick".

Apparently they're not legally allowed to probe any further than that.

 

[Jennifer Walters]

"I'm sick".

Apparently they're not legally allowed to probe any further than that.

My old boss so would at all times. I had the dreaded D word and he just was like ''We have the facilities to accommodate you."

 

[Majic Walrus]

Depending on your job most places do have ****ters so you can come in and work in between sitting on the throne... But I'll admit, work isn't where you want to be during that most difficult of times.

 

[thedeadite]

As a former supervisor I'll say this, anything more than a simple "I'm not feeling well" or "I'm too sick to come in" leads to almost immediate thoughts of "someone's lying".
All I say is "sorry, I don't think I'll be able to make it in today, just not feeling well at all".