Dating sites...?

[Anita18]

I understand all that. Those are great reasons and it applies for some dudes, but let's be real now. The vast majority of guys are going on dating sites for those reasons? I doubt it. I'll give the benefit of the doubt and say 50% are on there for those reasons.

Lemme guess, the other half are only there for some easy sex? (Or are hoping for easy sex? )

 

[Warhammer]

Lemme guess, the other half are only there for some easy sex? (Or are hoping for easy sex? )

Oh no, at least I'd hope not because I highly doubt eHarmony is the best place. That's too much damn work when there's nothing but scattered ass walking all on the street on a Friday or Saturday night. I think the other half are on there because they feel it's the only other way to find a significant other. Hell, there's a stigma that if you go on a dating site, you must be desperate. That's not always true. There were good reasons as to why people would go on these sites on the last page. Some guys just defeat themselves or let rejection overcome them.

 

[Erzengel]

I think Match was boasting that 1 in 5 relationships started off online.

I think another site was saying 17% of relationships started online. That's still a lot and just hard for me to think that all these guys are non aggressive pushovers who are too scared to get out there.

 

[Warhammer]

I think Match was boasting that 1 in 5 relationships started off online.

I think another site was saying 17% of relationships started online. That's still a lot and just hard for me to think that all these guys are non aggressive pushovers who are too scared to get out there.

I don't doubt that statistic. But look at it like this. How many people have no inhibitions once they are online? Let's look around this forum. How many of us say things openly that we wouldn't say to people in their face on the regular? How many of us are pricks online but wouldn't be outside saying all that? It's easier when you are anonymous. Even on Facebook or Twitter with people you do know on some personal level. It's easy to come off a certain way because when you are behind a monitor, there is no pressure at all.

 

[Erzengel]

I do agree it's easier to be an internet tough guy when there aren't any real repercussions.

Unless it's on SHH.

However, I don't think there is that more scared guys online then there is in real life. I mean they still have to go on those dates with girls? I mean there was a conversation here a while back, where a bunch of guys seemed to use school as an excuse to not date women. Or let's not forget those guys who are just great not being in a relationship and use the excuses that women only want money and to date a'holes or the whole nice guy finishes last crutch they cling to. At least guys on dating sites are proactive.

Honestly, I think it does take some a little bit of courage to have to message people online to start off dating. I don't disagree that it's not a little easier then trying to do the same in real life. It does still require a little bit of confidence.

 

[Warhammer]

I do agree it's easier to be an internet tough guy when there aren't any real repercussions.

Unless it's on SHH.

However, I don't think there is that more scared guys online then there is in real life. I mean they still have to go on those dates with girls? I mean there was a conversation here a while back, where a bunch of guys seemed to use school as an excuse to not date women. Or let's not forget those guys who are just great not being in a relationship and use the excuses that women only want money and to date a'holes or the whole nice guy finishes last crutch they cling to. At least guys on dating sites are proactive.

Honestly, I think it does take some a little bit of courage to have to message people online to start off dating. I don't disagree that it's not a little easier then trying to do the same in real life. It does still require a little bit of confidence.

That's pretty damn good. I can't even debate that post. You're 100% right on that one.

 

[Dark Raven]

My love life is...non existent, and dating sites to meet people as friends or more has been something that wasn't on my list, but was thought about, but only the free ones. Recently, I took a look at okcupid, and was shocked to see someone I knew on there. I never wanted to ask her about it, but it led to me to finally talk about these sites and ask if I should join one or more.

There's okcupid, is that a good site (even with someone I knew on there)? Are there others good or better than it, and that are free?

Let me know

I've seen loads of people I know on these dating sites. Most of the time we just avoid each other on there since there's no point in messaging them when you can chat to them in real life.

Not had any success so far with any of them.

 

[SuperSoldier985]

I understand all that. Those are great reasons and it applies for some dudes, but let's be real now. The vast majority of guys are going on dating sites for those reasons? I doubt it. I'll give the benefit of the doubt and say 50% are on there for those reasons.

Yeah, I'd like to find out where you get your stats from..

 

[Lasirius]

I also found my current boyfriend on okcupid pretty fast, it was the 1st date I got on that site and we've been together for more than a year. I consider myself lucky just like bullets said, I've heard experiences from other people that turn out rather badly or nothing ever happens.

I say go for it.

 

[Backstreets]

I use OKCupid, I've had success there since I've been using it in December. You really need to know what you are doing when writing a profile because a woman is reading it and they hear things differently...

Don't write "I like to hang with my friends, read comics and I'm currently in between jobs"

She'll hear "I sit around all with all my friends and read comics because I'm too lazy to get a job"

Do NOT post the following photos..

1) you shirtless
2) you drunk or with drinks in your hand
3) you with tons of other women
4) your motorcycle,truck, car or any other material object
5) The MySpace Photo
6) Overly smiling

Photos you SHOULD post
1) You with an animal
2) you being goofy and having fun
3) you not looking directly into the camera
4) Full body shot with clothes that fit you
5) Show off your passions (i.e you playing the guitar, golf..)

When you write your profile, word it to a woman's ears. like "I love playing with my dog on the beach, it's so much fun how he runs into the ocean and wants me to swim with him, I feel that he just wants to see me get wet! Much more engaging than "I like to play with my dog" which is guy talk. Talk she talk. Paint a detailed picture with words on your profile so she can connect with you! Cause women are all about connecting!

 

[Binker]

I met my fiance on Plenty of Fish.

has anyone tried geek2geek?

I've never heard of these sites til now. Funny, someone I use to know has a profile on g2g too. Heh

Maybe I missed it but why is you love life non existent and you must resort to dating sites?

Long story; painful experience back in Jan of 2011, and there are times, not all the time, when the ache feels fresh.

I've seen loads of people I know on these dating sites. Most of the time we just avoid each other on there since there's no point in messaging them when you can chat to them in real life.

Funny thing is, that one I know on okcupid; we're like acquaintances somewhat, but it was there that I found out more about her to the point where I would like to join her, hangout, and such. Problem is, she moved out into the city and is busy with her new job, so I haven't actually talked to her in a long while. Relationship-wise: her last boyfriend was too controlling and I don't know if she's taking a break from relationships or not.

That's also a thing with me and the women in my life; I know I won't be like the men in their lives (ie scumbags), but either they don't believe me or they don't want to take that chance.

I also found my current boyfriend on okcupid pretty fast, it was the 1st date I got on that site and we've been together for more than a year. I consider myself lucky just like bullets said, I've heard experiences from other people that turn out rather badly or nothing ever happens.
I say go for it.

Yeah, these are the experiences I'm hoping for when it comes to me.

I use OKCupid, I've had success there since I've been using it in December. You really need to know what you are doing when writing a profile because a woman is reading it and they hear things differently...

Don't write "I like to hang with my friends, read comics and I'm currently in between jobs"
She'll hear "I sit around all with all my friends and read comics because I'm too lazy to get a job"

Do NOT post the following photos..
1) you shirtless
2) you drunk or with drinks in your hand
3) you with tons of other women
4) your motorcycle,truck, car or any other material object
5) The MySpace Photo
6) Overly smiling

Photos you SHOULD post
1) You with an animal
2) you being goofy and having fun
3) you not looking directly into the camera
4) Full body shot with clothes that fit you
5) Show off your passions (i.e you playing the guitar, golf..)

When you write your profile, word it to a woman's ears. like "I love playing with my dog on the beach, it's so much fun how he runs into the ocean and wants me to swim with him, I feel that he just wants to see me get wet! Much more engaging than "I like to play with my dog" which is guy talk. Talk she talk. Paint a detailed picture with words on your profile so she can connect with you! Cause women are all about connecting!

Thanks for the advice. I haven't done any profile yet on any site, but sooner or later I will and we'll see.

 

[obin_gam]

I use OKCupid, I've had success there since I've been using it in December. You really need to know what you are doing when writing a profile because a woman is reading it and they hear things differently...

Don't write "I like to hang with my friends, read comics and I'm currently in between jobs"

She'll hear "I sit around all with all my friends and read comics because I'm too lazy to get a job"

Do NOT post the following photos..

1) you shirtless
2) you drunk or with drinks in your hand
3) you with tons of other women
4) your motorcycle,truck, car or any other material object
5) The MySpace Photo
6) Overly smiling

Photos you SHOULD post
1) You with an animal
2) you being goofy and having fun
3) you not looking directly into the camera
4) Full body shot with clothes that fit you
5) Show off your passions (i.e you playing the guitar, golf..)

When you write your profile, word it to a woman's ears. like "I love playing with my dog on the beach, it's so much fun how he runs into the ocean and wants me to swim with him, I feel that he just wants to see me get wet! Much more engaging than "I like to play with my dog" which is guy talk. Talk she talk. Paint a detailed picture with words on your profile so she can connect with you! Cause women are all about connecting!

I think I'm gonna change my profile to follow these rules, they actually sound good

 

[RedIsNotBlue]

Dating sites, at the least the free ones, are just going to be a waste of your time and life. Trust me...I regret the time I spent on them. It is like trying to find a needle in a haystack even if you are attractive and actually have something going on. You gotta get out there in the real world, strike up conversations, get to know people and once you meet someone you get along with and have an attraction with ask them to hang out or go on a date sometime. Now I am simplifying it because there are a lot of factors that go into meeting people (hobbies, appearance, likeability, shyness, etc.) so it can be more difficult for a lot of people. If you are one of those people that finds it hard to be that person who can just meet people and get to know them but you really want a better love life with the opposite sex then a PAY dating sadly is your best bet...at least until you get into the swing of the whole dating and getting to know a member of the opposite sex routine. I haven't done it myself but the fact is if men and women are paying money from their own pocket for a dating site then you better bet they are going to be more eager to go on actual dates compared to a free site.

 

[PyroChamber]

And with okcupid, if you're a guy, it's gonna be quite tough to get a respond from a woman if you message her. And all you'll usually get is a bunch of Quiver matchs.

 

[Erzengel]

Funny thing is, that one I know on okcupid; we're like acquaintances somewhat, but it was there that I found out more about her to the point where I would like to join her, hangout, and such. Problem is, she moved out into the city and is busy with her new job, so I haven't actually talked to her in a long while. Relationship-wise: her last boyfriend was too controlling and I don't know if she's taking a break from relationships or not.

That's also a thing with me and the women in my life; I know I won't be like the men in their lives (ie scumbags), but either they don't believe me or they don't want to take that chance.

Maybe they're just not attracted to you? It doesn't necessarily have to be because you're not a scumbag. And a lot of times, you usually hear the worst parts of a relationship.

 

[Backstreets]

Women go by how your profile makes them feel. Are you negative in your profile? Are your photos boring? Do you mention your passions?

"I love comic books! I feel that I need to engaging in a 12 step program to overcome my addiction!! It's really amazing to imagine what it would be like to live in the same world as superheroes! If you share this same feeling on any kind of level, we need to talk"

Much better than. I like comics, star wars, movies, candy, sports...Don't list things, it's annoying. Don't talk, show her. Paint a picture of what it would be like to hang out with you. That's why women use so many words when speaking, cause they are always painting pictures! Women are all about the details guys..

 

[Backstreets]

And with okcupid, if you're a guy, it's gonna be quite tough to get a respond from a woman if you message her. And all you'll usually get is a bunch of Quiver matchs.

It's a cake walk getting response on okcupid.

 

[Backstreets]

Maybe they're just not attracted to you? It doesn't necessarily have to be because you're not a scumbag. And a lot of times, you usually hear the worst parts of a relationship.

Email the women who have looked at your profile before you have sent them an email. Those are the ones checking you out and you can bust them on it.

Think outside the box

 

[Erzengel]

Email the women who have looked at your profile before you have sent them an email. Those are the ones checking you out and you can bust them on it.

Think outside the box

Okay.

I was referring to Binker's comment about the "women in his life" not necessarily the "women on the dating sites".

 

[Dark Raven]

Email the women who have looked at your profile before you have sent them an email. Those are the ones checking you out and you can bust them on it.

Think outside the box

Well I wouldn't say you should bust them on it. But they are potentially warm prospects. However, in my case, the women checking me out are in their late 40s-50s and some who have sons and daughters in their mid 20s.

Would it be bad to enquire about their daughters?

 

[Anita18]

Dating sites, at the least the free ones, are just going to be a waste of your time and life. Trust me...I regret the time I spent on them. It is like trying to find a needle in a haystack even if you are attractive and actually have something going on. You gotta get out there in the real world, strike up conversations, get to know people and once you meet someone you get along with and have an attraction with ask them to hang out or go on a date sometime. Now I am simplifying it because there are a lot of factors that go into meeting people (hobbies, appearance, likeability, shyness, etc.) so it can be more difficult for a lot of people. If you are one of those people that finds it hard to be that person who can just meet people and get to know them but you really want a better love life with the opposite sex then a PAY dating sadly is your best bet...at least until you get into the swing of the whole dating and getting to know a member of the opposite sex routine. I haven't done it myself but the fact is if men and women are paying money from their own pocket for a dating site then you better bet they are going to be more eager to go on actual dates compared to a free site.

I agree it's not going to be a cake walk. It took me 3 years on Plenty of Fish to find my fiance. But then again, we've been together 4 years now and he's my fiance so....I don't think that was wasted time. Also, I only checked profiles and messages pretty casually so it might have taken me less time had I been more proactive about it.

Also YMMV if you're a guy on a free site. My fiance got a few girlfriends from POF before he met me. He's no Brad Pitt or anything, but he's got a nice facial bone structure and he had a very well-paying job.

Well I wouldn't say you should bust them on it. But they are potentially warm prospects. However, in my case, the women checking me out are in their late 40s-50s and some who have sons and daughters in their mid 20s.

Would it be bad to enquire about their daughters?

...I would say yes.

 

[Warhammer]

Well I wouldn't say you should bust them on it. But they are potentially warm prospects. However, in my case, the women checking me out are in their late 40s-50s and some who have sons and daughters in their mid 20s.

Would it be bad to enquire about their daughters?

You better get on that. 2 for 1 special (I mean, if the mom is still kinda fine).

 

[Backstreets]

Okay.

I was referring to Binker's comment about the "women in his life" not necessarily the "women on the dating sites".

I know. I realized that after I hit submit reply.

 

[Backstreets]

Well I wouldn't say you should bust them on it. But they are potentially warm prospects. However, in my case, the women checking me out are in their late 40s-50s and some who have sons and daughters in their mid 20s.

Would it be bad to enquire about their daughters?

Yes, that would be creepy. Yes bust them about checkin you out! Call them out on it and tease them. something like "Heya, I saw you stopped by my profile and didn't even say hi! Are you too shy to send me an email? then your name.

 

[Backstreets]

Alos anyone using dating sites, Grammar and spelling is important "Dought tawlk like dis" or email them "hi how r u? They will just delete your email.