Friends

[MessiahDecoy123]

I've made more female friends and I have talked to more females in my final year of High School than all three previous years combined. It wasn't even a goal of mine, it just kinda happened. I'm not awesome as socializing with women, but I think I've gotten better.

I don't know if they are better friends to each other than men. I mean, men do talk **** about each other. My friends do it all the time, which makes me sad because I wonder what they say about me.

Usually it's a "good" sign if your friend gossips about others with you.

That means he thinks higher of you than he does of those he gossips about.

But if there's a friend he hangs out with that he suspiciously leaves out of gossip sessions then beware. That guy could be more trusted and respected than you and he probably talks about you with that person.

Personally I think this whole game is pointless. What do these people think this is? The Game of Thrones???

 

[GENERAL RAAM582]

I guess it's just life. Sometimes I get surprised too. I think two people are good friends, then one bashes the other. It's pretty awkward.

 

[Superwoman Prime]

Usually it's a "good" sign if your friend gossips about others with you.

That means he thinks higher of you than he does of those he gossips about.

But if there's a friend he hangs out with that he suspiciously leaves out of gossip sessions then beware. That guy could be more trusted and respected than you and he probably talks about you with that person.

Personally I think this whole game is pointless. What do these people think this is? The Game of Thrones???

Could be true if you've known them for a long time. If a person is hardly more than an acquaintance and gossips about others to you in private, rest assured they're playing all sides.

EDIT: Authority figures as the subject might be excepted. You can't always voice your opinion of them in public without blow-back.

 

[Silvermoth]

Done that past three years at Phoenix comicon. People tend to go in groups. I'm probably older than the average Hypster. I'm 40, and the catty high school stuff is long behind me. Yes, it happens when people are older, but less so in my experience.

I think it's interesting that girls of all ages like to take pictures with their friends but guys generally don't.

Hmm, that's a bit trickier. Does your local comic book convention have a message board? Maybe you could post a message and see if there are other people similar to your age bracket with similar interests who might want to meet up?

I mean you could do it here but it's probably a bit better to choose a place more location specific.

There's nothing worst than being around grown people who act more like kids than their own kids do.

Oh now surely there are worst things? It's all a bit of fun. My friends get silly and sometimes we ***** talk each other but only to each other's face and only because we've been friends for so long that we know what the limits are

 

[Lord]

Since i have more male friends, i see most of them talking s**** of each others behind the back, fortunatelly, most of the times they say things that they've already stated in the face of that friend they're bashing, so it's not really a secret, and they're mostly human flaws, not completelly despising another person. Most of the women i know are actually nicer to each others behind the back, though i do know some that seem to like to cause drama.

My guess is that it all depends on the person.

 

[Kelly]

Guys talk S*** as much as girls, they just don't spread it quite as fast.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

Guys talk S*** as much as girls, they just don't spread it quite as fast.

I disagree. Some guys may talk more s*** than some girls. Gossiping is, of course, not exclusive to one gender. But overall and on average, I do think there's more drama and gossiping within the social circles of girl friends, than guy friends. I know it's not politically correct to say that, and like I said, there are counter-examples. But generally speaking, guys and girls have different areas of interest when talking. Guys, almost have a psychological avoidance of discussing personal details in their lives or others, that may reveal vulnerabilities or make them appear too sensitive (hence immasculated) in front of their peers. It makes them uncomfortable, so they go for the broader stuff, talking about sports, politics, etc more. When they do grouch about people, it's usually detached figures in their lives, such as their boss or public figures, not close friends.

On the other hand, girls are more interested in the intimate topics that are more specific to them, such as what's going on within their friends' lives, wedding plans, and other developments because they're more communal and invested in the mosaic of personal stories, which occur within their circle. This is not necessarily a bad trait, as they remember more of the details unique to their friends and family (which is why you always see guys getting chewed out for not listening, forgetting anniversaries, etc). However, the ugly side of it is when it leads to gossip or stirring up drama.

Also, you can't deny that women corner the market on soap-opera viewership, tabloid magazine purchases, etc, which is a reflection of this interest in the personal and intimate. It's generally not guys who want to see pictures of the "royal baby" or discuss the latest celebrity split.

And finally, the fact it just doesn't "spread as fast" according to you. Well, generally the more gossips there are or the greater the interest is in discussing it, the faster it would spread.

 

[Persistence]

I agree with JJJ.

Some guys may trash talk significantly (sport events, bars, some competition to impress crowd, women), but they tend to be more direct about it and stops when the source of conflict is no longer in front of them. Guys may complain about something bothering them at that moment, but they are more prone to moving on when event is finished.

Women are more interested in discussing relationships, intimate issues wherever whenever than men regardless of what's going or whether its appropriate (at work, out at dinner, at party) and inquiring about everyone else's personal story and then discussing those stories with others. Several female co-workers ask me about who I'm dating or what I did for Valentines Days...guys are less prone to ask those type of questions at work.

 

[queenkale]

My guess is that it all depends on the person.

I think this applies to just about everything.

 

[Warhammer]

Everyone talks s***, regardless as gender. The issue is that while the majority of men will talk s*** in your face, women will talk s*** behind your back then put on a facade afterward. I see it all the time. A good amount of women claim to be "real" or "honest" but don't want to be perceived as the villain or queen b****. That logic baffles me. This is why I somewhat admire girls who are b****s. I'll take brutal honesty over being two-faced any day.

 

[Sundancer]

When I was in Japan as a teacher one of my students showed me the kanji character for woman. She then drew the kanji for noisy. It was the character for woman made three times.

 

[Destructus86]

I'm a guy and almost all my friends are women. I have a hard time making guy friends.

 

[Black Narcissus]

Here a question, if you're a guy and you're friends with a woman how do you keep yourself from becoming attracted to her and seeing her as nothing more than a friend?

T'is is very complicated and many legal procedures and such. I still have to stay 100 ft away from Michelle Pfeiffer. I tried to explain many times before, Keaton ran into my fist and not the other way around. This was around the time of Jackie Brown. I don't recommend a pony tail, it changes a man.

 

[Mandon Knight]

I have, I think a 'healthy' balance of both male and female friends, but having never been a 'blokey bloke' I very rarely am invited to boys nights out as such as when you get to my age (late 30's), everyone is 'hooked up or married anyway, so you tend to socialise in individual circumstances or as larger mixed gender groups.