Honk if You Hate Kid Actors

[Rowsdower!]

Okay, so the title of this thread is a bit of hyperbole, but how often has a movie been ruined or severely hindered by yet another horrible performance by a child actor?

Don't misunderstand me. There is a need for kid actors and there are plenty of good ones out there. But my God, I can't tell you how many times I've been sitting there watching a movie and thought to myself, "Okay, this little brat has no talent whatsoever... who is he related to?"

Granted, there are times when young actors have been severely hurt by bad direction and writing, but well, it's tough to defend a lousy performance. Here are some of my picks for the worst of the worst:

Jake Lloyd (Little Orphan Ani) in The Phantom Menace. Hayden Christiansen gets a lot of hate (as he should) but we mustn't forget young Jake was the first step in ruining the greatest movie villain of all time.

Tristan Lake Leabu (Jason) in Superman Returns. Giving Superman a kid was never a good idea, but casting a kid who acts like he's got brain damage made it even worse.

Jonathan Ke Quan (Short Round) in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. I think this one gets overlooked because Kate Capshaw is so annoying as the love interest that she overwhelms everyone else, but this kid was also irritating as hell and a terrible actor.

Norman D. Golden II (Devon) in Cop and a Half. Yeah, this movie would have sucked anyway, but the annoying little brat in the lead role made my want to gouge my ears and eyes out with an icepick.

What are some of the worst performances by kid actors in your opinion?

 

[Figs]

I agree with everyone on your list except Short Round.

I'll add Tim in Jurassic Park and Malcolm's daughter in JP2.

 

[Octoberist]

Short Round meant a lot to me as a kid so.. I think he rocks.

 

[Rowsdower!]

I agree with everyone on your list except Short Round.

I'll add Tim in Jurassic Park and Malcolm's daughter in JP2.

These two x 1,000

 

[Rowsdower!]

Short Round meant a lot to me as a kid so.. I think he rocks.

Yeah, I knew that would be a controversial one but what can I say? He always annoyed me. Still love the movie though.

 

[Donut]

I hate kids anything in movies these days, Every single movie. Especially action ones now a days. Has some stupid kid scene

 

[Rowsdower!]

I hate kids anything in movies these days, Every single movie. Especially action ones now a days. Has some stupid kid scene

Yeah, it seems like action movies do always need to include some dumb kid scene.

 

[chamber-music]

I like Short Round as well but there have certainly been some child actors that have ruined good movies.

I hated that kid in the Mummy Returns.

I feel bad for that Jake Lloyd guy because he says the Star Wars films ruined his life after he got bullied alot after the films came out.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...d-Star-Wars-fame-turned-life-living-hell.html

 

[Figs]

Surprisingly one of the few kids that never annoyed me was Elliott in E.T.

He never used to bother me when I was a kid but having watched Home Alone two nights ago, Culkin is incredibly annoying in that movie. I just couldn't stand when he starts talking to himself. "This is it, don't get scared now".

I feel bad for that Jake Lloyd guy because he says the Star Wars films ruined his life after he got bullied alot after the films came out.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...d-Star-Wars-fame-turned-life-living-hell.html

After turning in a performance like that, maybe he deserved it.

 

[Sawyer]

I'll take Lloyd's Anakin over Jar Jar any day of the week. With Jar Jar around, Lloyd will always only be the second worst thing in Phantom Menace.

 

[R_Hythlodeus]

Jason Bateman in Little House in the Prairie
Joseph Gordon-Levitt in A River Runs Through It
Anna Paquin in The Piano
Natalie Portman in Léon
Drew Barrymore in ET
Elijah Wood in Back To The Future II
Christian Bale in Empire Of The Sun

All very annoying and I hope to see them never again.

 

[Figs]

Jason Bateman in Little House in the Prairie
Joseph Gordon-Levitt in A River Runs Through It
Anna Paquin in The Piano
Natalie Portman in Léon
Drew Barrymore in ET
Elijah Wood in Back To The Future II
Christian Bale in Empire Of The Sun

All very annoying and I hope to see them never again.

Still haven't seen Empire of the Sun but out of those you listed, I only disagree with Portman.

 

[Rowsdower!]

I like Short Round as well but there have certainly been some child actors that have ruined good movies.

I hated that kid in the Mummy Returns.

Haha, yeah I forgot about him. He was really annoying.

I feel bad for that Jake Lloyd guy because he says the Star Wars films ruined his life after he got bullied alot after the films came out.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbi...d-Star-Wars-fame-turned-life-living-hell.html

GOOD.

(Just kidding, seriously. I do feel bad for him.)

 

[Rowsdower!]

Jason Bateman in Little House in the Prairie
Joseph Gordon-Levitt in A River Runs Through It
Anna Paquin in The Piano
Natalie Portman in Léon
Drew Barrymore in ET
Elijah Wood in Back To The Future II
Christian Bale in Empire Of The Sun

All very annoying and I hope to see them never again.

LOL, fair enough. There are always exceptions to the rule.

 

[Jackasscoley15]

Any kid from a 2000's soccer-mom flick. Including, but not limited to:

Cheaper by the Dozen 1 & 2
Yours, Mine, and Ours
The Pacifier
Daddy Day Care
Daddy Day Camp
The Spy Next Door
Kicking & Screaming
The Game Plan
The Tooth Fairy

 

[CapedCrusader14]

Short Round is horrible and always will be.

Christian Bale in Empire of the Sun was one of the few times I enjoyed a child actor's performance.

 

[Baramos]

I think they're getting better, or else when they are British it is not so obvious--I wouldn't mind seeing a movie with either Maisie Williams or Isaac Hempstead-Wright (both are phenomenal on Game of Thrones).

By and large obviously they are annoying, but it's hard to pin down why. Often they are given absolutely wooden dialogue that even an adult would find cloying--see the kid who played Anakin being given the dialogue "Yippee!" I mean, come now. Obviously the kid was also BAD at acting due to only being whatever, 12, but there's only so much a Julliard graduate could have done with Star Wars dialogue.

Another thing is that often movies with child actors revolve around saccharine crude in the first place--obviously anyone viewing say, Jack Frost, is already going to be annoyed by the plot of the thing, let alone the acting.

 

[CapedCrusader14]

The kids in Super 8 were great as well.

 

[Baramos]

I think ultimately it's going to be "is it a good move in the first place"--if the dialogue/story is good the children are probably going to sell it alright in the end. Super 8 is a good example of a fine movie with child actors who are also fine--but it's probably due at least partly to JJ Abrams knowing what he is doing.

 

[Project862006]

loved the kid from real steel

 

[CapedCrusader14]

Yeah that kid was alright too.

I just remembered a great kid actor. The one from Looper. My god I was impressed by him.

 

[ThePhantasm]

A rare exception: I thought the kid who acted as John Connor in T2 did a good job.

 

[DACrowe]

Just recently, I can say the kids in Kick-Ass/Let Me In (since one of them is the same kid), Super 8 and Les Miserables were good.

And yes, throughout cinema history there are many notable exceptions. Tatum O'Neal in Paper Moon. Jodie Foster in Taxi Driver. Haley Joel Osment in The Sixth Sense. Natalie Portman in Léon. Christian Bale in Empire of the Sun. Anna Paquin in The Piano. The kids who played Scout and Gem in To Kill a Mockingbird.

There are plenty of good ones out there.

 

[CGHulk]

There have be and there are good kid actors.

Haley Joel Osment - The Sixth Sense
Drew Barrymore -E.T.
Henry Thomas - E.T.
Elle Fanning - Super 8
Dakota Fanning - War of the Worlds
Joseph Mazzello - Jurassic Park
Ariana Richards - Jurassic Park
Anna Paquin - The Piano
Wil Wheaton - Stand By Me
Jerry O’Connell - Stand By Me
River Phoenix - Stand By Me
Cory Feldman - Goonies, Stand By Me
Sean Astin - Goonies
Jonathan Ke Quan - Goonies
Jeff Cohen - Goonies
Charlie Korsmo - Hook, Dick Tracy
Chloe Moretz - Kick-Ass, Hugo
Christian Bale - Empire of the Sun
Natalie Portman - The Professional
Kirsten Dunst - Interview with a Vampire
Jodie Foster - Taxi Driver
Elijah Wood - The Good Son
Linda Blair - The Exorcist
Christina Ricci - The Adams Family
Bobby Driscoll - Treasure Island
Hayley Mills - The Parent Trap, Pollyanna
Natalie Wood - Miracle on 34th Street
Elizabeth Taylor - Life with Father
Debbie Turner - The Sound of Music
Margaret O'Brien - Meet Me in St. Louis
Shirley Temple
The kids from the Little Rascals. (1930's)

 

[Alien Anal]

Edward furlong has always been a bad ass child actor to me. Even today when i watch T2 i cant stop thinking how cool he is.

Damn he is cool