Dark Knight
Avenger
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2001
- Messages
- 15,490
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- 31
Well, I finshed the script. And it's damn good. It's a good starting point for a first draft.
That script review pretty mch capture my opinions of it.
The humor is BAD. Just bad. And that Nathan kid can be annoying, with what he says and paired with the wrong kid actor, it could be terrible. But hopefully, they tone down his role in it.
Another negative is the Hector Hammond character. He's one dimensional and doesn't really ass anyhting to the film accept the villain. HIs main thing was to impress his father, it was a bit childish. Or is this the point? It didn't come across as strong enough.
But with more dratfs this could be fixed. Though not very clear, the parallel between Hammond and Hal are there. The father thing. It's interestring. One is trying to impress his father while he's alive who isn'y impressed and Hal is just tryining to impress and do good but his father is dead. This should be brought out more and strengthened in the finished film. Introduce Hammond sooner, who appears about 30 pages in. And most of al make Hammond a stronger character with not only to impress his daddy.
I loved the real hero bit at the end where only Hal not GL saves Carol. Keep that, it's perfect, Hal has been trying to do good this whole script and he has let down people everyone around him, and when he's finally GL, Carol and other accept him though they don't know he's GL. It makes a bold and great statement when he does something good as himself in the finale to rpove what he's really worth and you don't need a ring to solve your problems, (A problem I've had with the character) but it shows true heroism in the real man himself and though it takes a while to find, it's there, and it's fully realized. That has never been done CBM. Have the person save the day and not the superhero. It fits prefectly what they're trying to accomplish.
Like I said, the tone is perfect, there is alot of great diologue especially between the Lantern Corps and Sinestro and Hal. Some great banter between Carol and Hal. Reminds me of the Han Solo Leia relationship in ESB, it fits great here.
The action sequences are fantastic. Though someitmes it seems a bit much for me. Sometimes I got confused where who the real villain as, Hammond or Legion?
Hammond isn't fleshed out all that well. He just gets the powers and uses them for villainy. That's about it. He needs work the most.
Tom sets a nice tone where for a while, him and Hal are the only ones that know about the Lantern. HIm and Tom in ther garage together working out the spaceship, keeping it secret. It reminded me of what 8 year old boys do.
Overall, a great script. It needs work, take out Berlanti's annoying diologue and thank God he didn't direct. Campbell will make all the right changes and choice I'm sure.
^^^Agreed! Lets hope Campbell makes the right adjustments which I'm positive he will do.
I am also glad Berlanti didn't direct this first GL film....especially with the bad jokes.