Matt Ruins Your Favorite Christmas Carols!

[Mee]

Happy Christmas (War is Over)



...

 

[Flexo]

Georgia doesn't get snow, we just get the devil and his crazy violin.

Fiddle, fiddle damn you!

Speaking of which, would you be interested in a contest of sorts? Muhahaha. Tee hee. Cackle.

 

[JLBats]

White Christmas sucks as song down here. You know it says, "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas"

Well, here dreaming is all we can do

Oh, waaaah...

I've lived in Northern Ontario (Canada) all my life. A white Christmas is a ****ing curse. Thank the Gods that this year global warming has put an end to it and we have not two bits of snow outside.

 

[Mee]

Fiddle, fiddle damn you!

Speaking of which, would you be interested in a contest of sorts? Muhahaha. Tee hee. Cackle.

Pfft, you're not the devil. You're practice.

 

[Flexo]

Pfft, you're not the devil. You're practice.

Oy vey.

 

[hippie_hunter]

Oh, waaaah...

I've lived in Northern Ontario (Canada) all my life. A white Christmas is a ****ing curse. Thank the Gods that this year global warming has put an end to it and we have not two bits of snow outside.

Hurray for global warming!

 

[Matt]

But Santa doesn't allow Jews to celebrate Christmas.

Anyways, the other reindeer hated Rudolph simply because he was a f**king freak. Notice how they all hated him until he saved Christmas out of nowhere. Even though they all love him all of a sudden, they still think that he's a freak deep down. Even his father thought that he was a freak!

No,no,no silly boy. It was a metaphor for his baptisim.

 

[Fran]

What is the point of this thread?

 

[Matt]

If you're open-minded enough to expand beyond Christmas songs, try "Rock of Ages" or "I Have a Little Dreidel".

Why do you hate the troops, Commie?

 

[Matt]

Christmas Time Is Here.

Do it.

Quit making songs up.

 

[Matt]

The Little Drummer Boy

Too easy.

 

[Superman79]

"Chipmunks roasting on an open fire,
Hot sauce dripping from their toes..."

 

[Matt]

Any other requests?

 

[Lackey]

But Santa doesn't allow Jews to celebrate Christmas.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40qTXlNJj9s

 

[Ronny Shade]

Frosty the Snowman - Frosty's escape to the Northpole to avoid melting is short lived as Global Warming gets the best of him.

That's the best you can do?

 

[jaguarr]

"Chipmunks roasting on an open fire,
Hot sauce dripping from their toes..."

LOL! This one is my favorite so far. We used to sing something similar about my friend Jeff during the holidays that went "Jeff's nuts roasting on an open fire..."

jag

 

[Lackey]

Did anyone else ever realize Frosty was just a huge ******? I realized it when I was in a department store and I heard this 30-some year-old mongoloid with his mom repeating the phrase "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" over and over.

 

[Lackey]

LOL! This one is my favorite so far. We used to sing something similar about my friend Jeff during the holidays that went "Jeff's nuts roasting on an open fire..."

jag

we would sing "Deez nuts resting in your open mouth..."

 

[Ronny Shade]

Did anyone else ever realize Frosty was just a huge ******? I realized it when I was in a department store and I heard this 30-some year-old mongoloid with his mom repeating the phrase "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" over and over.

Frosty the snowman is a cocaine allegory

 

[twylight]

I'll keep you Warm in December

 

[Ronny Shade]

so will cocaine

 

[Lackey]

Ronny Shade just ruined my holidays