I'm getting this down here for the record and I'm not kidding friends with this. Not one bit.
About 10-15 minutes ago a stalker showed up who has been trying to get to Iman, the former super model that was married to David Bowie who lives at my job.
He had shown up on my shift once a couple weeks back but that was the first time I saw him. So, someone is at the door. This guy has a suit, long coat, and doesn't look like he's crazy homeless or something. I let him in and too late I realize it's the guy from before.
"Hey... It's Valentine's Day!" he says in this sing songy way.
I immediately get up and tell him he isn't dropping anything off he's not hanging around, he's getting his ass out of here. He responds with a very bold. "Are you gonna try and throw me out of here?"
"I will do whatever I must to do my job sir. Please leave now."
So this mutha****a... He puts his hands up like he wants to throw down. I'm too ****ing old myself (this guy looks late 50's/early 60's so, he's got 15 to 20 years on me...) to get into a fist fight, plus, as a martial artist I know... You don't want to get into a fight. You ideal want to intercept an attack and administer a beatdown. That's not a fight. That's not a back and forth with him hitting me and then I hit back, blocking, tackling, throws, all that good stuff. YOU DON'T WANT THAT. You wanna stop or snuff an incoming attack and then ****ing whale on the guy to the point one can escape, and if that's not possible, incapacitate them to the point control is possible or they are incapable of standing or running.
So... I'm not trading hands with the guy. He wants to throw down? Okay Kemosabe... Ready to dance with some Kali sticks? Once he put his hands up and was refusing to leave he brought whatever might happen on himself. I grab my sticks and just do some technique sequences (Double stick mind you, and unlike a lot of Filipino Martial Arts practicioners (Sorry bros... It's the truth...) I've trained siniwali to a point of actual ambidexterity and actual effectiveness. I have no qualms fighting double stick/sword/machete/knife.
Well that's all I had to start doing. "Oh ****!" sayeth the psycho. The guy just backs up really quick to where he hits the entrance door, still facing me. I keep stepping closer still swinging getting ready to beat the crazy off him. "Open that door behind you. OPEN THAT DOOR BEHIND YOU!" I yell at him. He does after a moment and then he's back out, without me having to actually do anything to him.
Once outside this guy starts screaming his head off in the most insane and irrational display I've seen in front of my face in the long time. He starts in on EVERYTHING. The Jews. Nazis. How he has an army... The ravings of a madman. But one who turned on a dime. He sounded more or less normal when he arrived, now he was full on psycho. I stay outside still armed at the entrance (I don't want him smashing the windows or anything.) and he's yelling at me as he walks fast down the block.
Here's the thing folks... This man's actions are ESCALATING. This my second time dealing with him, but he's tried to get in before and been continually dropping "gifts" off during the day shift, at least 3 to 4 times before in recent months although as I understand it, he's kinda been stalking her for a few years.
In any case... This isn't going to down shift in intensity. That's not how this **** goes. Captain Unbalanced is gonna come back. And I don't give a **** if any other Hypesters think I'm being dramatic but... It's a matter of time until this man returns with a gun.
It's inevitable. These types do not go home and reconsider their actions. If they were like that, they would have stayed on their meds or continued treatment, whatever. No, this guy is gonna return and I'll be blunt... I'm not taking a bullet for Iman. Uh-uh.
I'm gonna have a long talk with my super and hopefully Iman and I am going to tell her for her safety and now mine, she is going to do everything within her considerable wealth and connections to get this ******* off the streets. We KNOW his name. They know he's stalking her but I suppose until he actually gets violent there's little the authorities can do. Well... We've moved beyond mere restraining order territory. I'll testify in any case and I'll make sure to have our building supply the neccessary security footage. But she's GOING to use her money and connections to send this guy away because, again... I AM NOT GETTING SHOT BY A ****ING PSYCHOPATH BECAUSE IMAN DIDN'T WANT TO SPEND MONEY.
So... Real talk... In the days and weeks ahead if I suddenly disappear Loungers... Well something might have actually happened. I'll keep the crew here up to date with anything that happens.
Anyone that thinks this a joke or a prank, the other Loungers will tell you I am 100% the night concierge/security at the building where indeed David Bowie and Iman live(d).