Spidey's Wisecracks... SUGGESTIONS

[Immortalfire]

From the animated series, some simple thugs have blown up a jewelry store. Spidey webs away their weapons, so in stroke of genius, they decide to fight him hand to hand.

Thug: Get him! It's three against one!
Spider-Man: As far as I'm concerned, that means you're outnumbered.

 

[M.E.H.Z.E.B]

Electro tries to fry Spider-Man with bolts of electricity, while our hero dogdes them. Spider-Man finally lands on the side of a building...

Spider-Man: You really need to work on your social skills.

 

[3dman27]

spidey to electro
you think YOU'RE gonna beat me with ELECTRICAL BLASTS who do you think you are IRON MAN? GET OUTTA HERE BEFORE I HAVE YOU ARRESTED FOR IMPERSONATING A TASER

 

[terry78]

It would be cool if he referenced others in the Marvel universe as they did with Doc Strange in part 2, but I doubt they'd do it.

 

[Red]

How about something simple like Spidey calling Venom "smiley".

 

[Visionary]

How old are you people, seriously?

I'm trying to get rid of some of this juvenile crap, in hopes that we get an R-rated Spider-Man film someday. And you all want dodo jokes added to the movies.

 

[Agent Thermal]

Perhaps some of us prefer a degree of cleanliness to the jokes we choose to hear.

 

[3dman27]

thats right agent thermal

 

[terry78]

FYI, Spider-Man is, regardless of how old he gets, a juvinile character. He can be in his 30's and still spouting off like a smart ass teenager, that's just his persona.

 

[TheReturnOfP]

So not a Spidey wisecrack...but "I've heard of dreadlocks, but ****locks?" - The Nutty Professor.

 

[TheReturnOfP]

How old are you people, seriously?

I'm trying to get rid of some of this juvenile crap, in hopes that we get an R-rated Spider-Man film someday. And you all want dodo jokes added to the movies.

I wouldn't wish that anyday...less people would watch a Spider-Man movie that's rated R. And when I say less, I mean...a lot of people...it won't make Spidey a fun-loving hero anymore like he's pictured...it'll turn out to be a 'Spider-Man turned Punisher'.

 

[spideyman101]

How old are you people, seriously?

I'm trying to get rid of some of this juvenile crap, in hopes that we get an R-rated Spider-Man film someday. And you all want dodo jokes added to the movies.

d00d. spidey is for the kids mainly. yes adults love it too, but hey, keep it for the kids.

so dude, go fry your brain somewhere else.

 

[Roughneck]

The Second time he fights Sandman - You again? Last time I got too much sand in my Tights. Have you ever tried to get sand out of your butt in tights?

 

[3dman27]

spidey
"first green goblin, then dr octopus then gobby's son now you sandman why can't i ever runinto ninja villians i jump around like an overhyper ninja anyway"

 

[Mr Jide]

How old are you people, seriously?

I'm trying to get rid of some of this juvenile crap, in hopes that we get an R-rated Spider-Man film someday. And you all want dodo jokes added to the movies.

 

[Visionary]

Look who's talking about beating a dead horse.

 

[TehUberMuffinXD]

How old are you people, seriously?

I'm trying to get rid of some of this juvenile crap, in hopes that we get an R-rated Spider-Man film someday. And you all want dodo jokes added to the movies.

Oh boo hoo. Cry me a river. Parker is pretty much a kid at heart, you can't change it

 

[Black Spiderman]

How old are you people, seriously?

I'm trying to get rid of some of this juvenile crap, in hopes that we get an R-rated Spider-Man film someday. And you all want dodo jokes added to the movies.

Cmon this is Spiderman were talking about.

 

[Visionary]

So, it's Spider-Man I'm talking about...it'll still attract the masses.

 

[spider-neil]

my favorite spidey wise cracks

90's cartoon
crooks -it's spider-man!!
spider-man - where! where! I got so flustered when I see a celebrity!

shocker - you'll pay for this spider-man!
spidey (after beating him up) - the checks in the mail baby!

00's cg cartoon
peter - mary jane when I look at you I think...(spots robbery) HOLY CRAP!!
* it's a you have to be there joke but it's classic

comics
crooks - quick rush him!!
spidey (beating them up as he talks) - there's no need to rush guys there's plenty of me to go round, yes sir this is as much fun a little spider can have without taking his clothes off

 

[M.E.H.Z.E.B]

my favorite spidey wise cracks

90's cartoon
crooks -it's spider-man!!
spider-man - where! where! I got so flustered when I see a celebrity!

shocker - you'll pay for this spider-man!
spidey (after beating him up) - the checks in the mail baby!

00's cg cartoon
peter - mary jane when I look at you I think...(spots robbery) HOLY CRAP!!
* it's a you have to be there joke but it's classic

comics
crooks - quick rush him!!
spidey (beating them up as he talks) - there's no need to rush guys there's plenty of me to go round, yes sir this is as much fun a little spider can have without taking his clothes off

Nice collection.

 

[3dman27]

spider-man on first seeing the sandman
i 'm tangling with aguy made outa SAND? WHAT IS THIS THE COVENANT PART TWO?"

 

[Mr Jide]

Look who's talking about beating a dead horse.

Yeah but what I want actually stands a chance. This R-rated spider-man nonsense isn't even a possibility t:

 

[Mr Jide]

FYI, Spider-Man is, regardless of how old he gets, a juvinile character. He can be in his 30's and still spouting off like a smart ass teenager, that's just his persona.

You and I know that but Raimi obviously doesn't.

 

[Sean Adisano]

i always loved this line from the spidey 2 game when spidey is talking to quentin beck when his laser breaks down:

Spidey: "Awww, whats a matter Beck, your laser's not working? I hear they have pills for that now."