Teen Titans

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction & Films' started by Zev, Jan 21, 2006.

  1. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
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    Grayson and Barbara, on a date, have just finished watching the show. Grayson munches on some leftover popcorn as they wait in line.

    GRAYSON: So, what do you think of the circus?

    BARBARA: Corny. Real corny. Of course, the clowns aren't exactly my favorite.

    Grayson gives himself a self-scolding bonk to the head.

    GRAYSON: Argh! Stupid, stupid, stupid!

    BARBARA: Easy there, I was just kidding. Besides, it's not like I've got an exclusive on issues with circuses. If you can stand it...

    GRAYSON: I really don't think about it much.

    BARBARA: Well, we'll consider this past trauma neutral ground.

    They reach the end of the line. A FERRIS WHEEL. The ticket-taker offers to help Barbara strap her wheelchair in, but she refuses and does it herself. The wheelchair space is across from the bench. Grayson sits down across from her. The wheel starts up. Soon they're riding high, their faces aglow in a dizzying whirlwind of lights.

    GRAYSON: Corny?

    BARBARA: I mean that in a good way. Circuses are supposed to be goofy and quaint, right?

    GRAYSON: Right... I guess.

    BARBARA: Don't be so sensitive. "Let's tiptoe around Babs." "Don't upset Babs." Are you the one that's got Helena doing that?

    GRAYSON: (uncomfortable) Let's not talk about Helena.

    BARBARA: Oh, right, I forgot. We were here to talk about my issues. Well, let's see, I can't walk and I still brace myself everytime I answer the door. How's that? (beat) I'm sorry...

    GRAYSON: Don't apologize. It's good to talk.

    BARBARA: I've had enough of talking.

    GRAYSON: But not of hurting.

    BARBARA: We're Batman's. We never have enough of hurting. But I've moved on. That's the important thing. A lot of the time it's like you Batguys want me to hold on to the past because you can't get over it. I have. I have a new life now. One I like, one that fulfills me. It's not the same one I had before, but it's good. Maybe even better.

    GRAYSON: What do you miss the most?

    BARBARA: Haven't you heard a word I said?

    GRAYSON: Every one of them. And I respect them. But the woman I'm talking to isn't Batgirl or Oracle. It's Barbara Gordon and I have a question for her. What's the one thing you can't do now that you wish you could?

    Barbara looks away.

    BARBARA: You know that moment when you're on the ledge with the jumpline in your hand? You feel the wind... you hear the traffic way below... then you're off into space. And for a few seconds before the line loses slack and your swing begins...

    She beams.

    BARBARA: You're on wings.

    The Ferris wheel comes to a stop. As they get off...

    GRAYSON: You miss that the most.

    BARBARA: Well, that and the cape. It made me feel like Evel Knievel.

    GRAYSON: I'm just surprised it would be something that physical.

    BARBARA: I was never the natural athlete you are, but I worked at it. It's something I think about now and then.

    Grayson takes her hand.

    GRAYSON: Come on.

    BARBARA: What?

    GRAYSON: You've got the upper body strength. Heck, you're probably stronger than you were before.

    BARBARA: What are you talking about, Grayson?

    GRAYSON: Flying.


    Deserted. Grayson and Barbara SWING from a trapeze. Barbara has her legs strapped together to keep them out of the way.

    BARBARA: You win, former Boy Wonder. I am loving it.

    GRAYSON: Just don't fall. I'm not carrying you up here again. Next bar's coming up. Wait for the snap. Now!

    They leap to the next bar. It's beautiful. Grayson lets go. He catches onto a rope lower down.

    BARBARA: You didn't say you were leaving me here, Grayson!

    GRAYSON: You can solo, Babs. It's just like riding a bike.

    BARBARA: Ha ha. It's not the same thing. If you're trying to scare me...

    GRAYSON: I didn't think that was possible. We're out here, I thought we'd have fun.

    He monkey-bars to the pole across from Barbara.

    BARBARA: What'd you have in mind?

    GRAYSON: A simple flying transfer.

    BARBARA: You're kidding.

    GRAYSON: Kintergarten stuff.

    BARBARA: (angry) Okay, the joke's gone far enough. Maybe this isn't registering with you, but you gave up being Robin. I had Batgirl taken away from me. So stop pretending it's the same thing!

    GRAYSON: I'm not. You know me better than that.

    BARBARA: Does that mean you'll get me down?

    GRAYSON: That means you have to trust me.

    Barbara bites her lip.

    GRAYSON: Or maybe it's you that you don't trust.

    Barbara looks at him, her eyes set.

    BARBARA: You talk too much, Grayson.

    She swings. Grayson swings too. Spidey-monkeys up and hangs by his knees from the bar. Barbara lets go of her bar and takes Grayson's hands. They dangle.

    GRAYSON: I knew you still had it in you.

    BARBARA: I do, don't I?


    Grayson walks Barbara to the door.

    GRAYSON: Have I ever told you that you're the only hero who constantly makes me feel inadequate?

    BARBARA: Thought that was Bruce's job.

    GRAYSON: No, that's a whole different... I just mean... I mean you're terrific, a genius, and I can't remember if I've said that lately.

    Barbara smiles.

    BARBARA: Walk me upstairs. I'll put on a pot of coffee and some Queen CDs. It'll be nice.

    Grayson breaks out in a cold sweat.

    GRAYSON: No, I can't.

    BARBARA: Are you sure? If there's a supervillain waiting to ambush me, I'll have no one to protect me. Dinah's off on a mission, Helena's doing God-doesn't-want-to-know what...

    GRAYSON: No, I mean... I can't.

    Long beat.

    BARBARA: If you don't want me... what do you want?

    GRAYSON: Time. That's all I need. Time.


    Smash cut to Grayson being SLAMMED against a chainlink fence. The wire pressing into his cheek as a man leans in. It's Wally.

    WALLY: Worthless little insect. You enjoyed it, didn't you?

    He pulls an arm around Grayson's throat, putting him in a submission hold. Whirls him around so he's looking at something we can't see.

    WALLY: Look at it, you little sicko! Look what you did! You could've stopped it!

    GRAYSON: That's not true! I was in no... there was nothing I could do!

    WALLY: Liar! You enjoyed it and that's why Bruce and everyone else is going to see you for exactly what you are, you dirty son of a *****! Dirty little boy... do you know why your parents LEFT?

    GRAYSON: It's not like that! You weren't there!

    WALLY: It's not a sin if you don't enjoy it. And you enjoyed it.


    Grayson wakes up, in a cold sweat. Breathing hard. Afraid for his life.

    After a moment, Grayson settles back down into bed. Turns on the radio.


    Wally stands in the shadows, the tip of his cigarette glowing like an ember, spying on EDGAR. Edgar's your average drug dealer, doesn't stand out much. His ring vibrates. He puts it to his ear.

    BARBARA: (filtered) Flash, can I ask you something? As a man?

    WALLY: Sure. Just lower your voice a bit and think about sex more.

    BARBARA: (filtered) No, I mean I need to ask your opinion as a man.

    WALLY: Well, I really think you'd need to consult with a good plastic surgeon first...

    BARBARA: (filtered) West, shut up. What does it mean when a man doesn't want to have sex with a woman anymore?

    WALLY: "Man," "doesn't," and "have sex" don't fit into a conversation together. Either she's such a hog that you'd need to legalize bestiality, or he can't rise to the occasion, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

    BARBARA: (filtered) So, hypothetically speaking, can a man and a woman be in a loving relationship when he doesn't want to... express his love?

    WALLY: Hypothetically speaking, I'd love to express my love to you.

    BARBARA: (filtered) You're no help.

    Wally looks up to see the clocktower in the distance. He smiles at it.

    WALLY: Listen, you really want my advice? Just be patient. I'm sure it's got nothing to do with you. Dick seems like a great guy. I know I give him a hard time a lot, but he's not all that bad.

    BARBARA: (filtered) You mean that?

    WALLY: Yeah, I do.

    BARBARA: (filtered) It wasn't always this way, you know. In the past few months, he's changed. A lot. He quit his job at the bar, he changed his phone number, updated his costume... You should've seen his face when he said he was going to be moving here. Sometimes I think he's more Nightwing than Dick Grayson now. I think you would've liked Dick Grayson. He was more like you. He was...

    WALLY: The man you fell in love with?

    The question goes unanswered.

    BARBARA: (filtered) Good night.

    WALLY: Hey, hey you take care now, alright? Don't go taking any candy from strangers.

    She signs off. He looks at his reflection in a puddle.

    WALLY: Don't you start.

    Across the street, a KID is buying drugs from Edgar, who finishes the transaction and moves off. Wally steps forward, blocking the kid. He wordlessly takes the drugs from the kid, sends him on his way.


    Close on Flash. He holds a knife in his hand.

    FLASH: Now, who's your supplier?

    EDGAR: (O.S.) Go to hell.

    He THROWS the knife. Whip-pan to EDGAR, tied to a fence. The knife sinks in just to the side of his face.

    EDGAR: You can't do this to me! I have protection against you people!

    FLASH: You people?

    EDGAR: Capes and tights! I have insurance! He said he wouldn't let you guys have me!

    FLASH: Who?

    Edgar doesn't say anything. Flash picks up another knife.

    FLASH: Okay, but keep in mind, it's getting late. I don't know how much longer I can...

    He yawns and throws the knife. Suddenly we shift into FLASH-TIME. Flash grabs the knife and sticks it to the fence just below Edgar's crotch, then resumes his previous position.

    EDGAR: Oh my God!

    FLASH: I know. I can't believe I missed.

    Next: Christmas
  2. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    It's snowing heavily now. Wally and Linda walk past a group of carolers singing "Christmas Time Is Here" (the Charlie Brown Christmas Special song).

    LINDA: So, have you got all your Christmas shopping done?

    WALLY: Oh, shoot. I forgot. Hold on a second.


    A RED BLUR clears out the store at superspeed, even taking a moment to play the Minute Waltz in about twenty seconds on the giant keyboard.


    Wally exits the store, holding his huge pile of gifts.

    There's a serious hustle and bustle. Wally bumps into a couple.

    WALLY: Hey, watch it buddy!

    MAN: Why don't you look where you're going?

    WALLY: You wanna go? Is that it?

    WOMAN: C'mon, let it go.

    MAN: You're lucky my chick's here.

    WALLY: You're lucky I've got Christmas shopping to do.

    They part.

    WALLY: *******!


    Wally zips back beside Linda.

    WALLY: Done. C'mon, we're going to be late.

    LINDA: Why don't we just stay in tonight? I mean, if it's important that you're there on Christmas...

    WALLY: It is. And it's important that you're there with me. Trust me. You'll have fun. They're a good bunch.


    Wally and Linda are in the courtyard of the building. Above, we see Nightwing is rappelling from the roof of the tower, setting up Christmas lights with acrobatics that would look more at home in the Cirque de Solace.

    LINDA: He certainly is... bendy.

    Flash is looping lengths of Christmas lights around his arms and neck.

    FLASH: Bendy? I'll give her bendy...

    He runs up the tower, spooling the Christmas tree lights behind him.


    Cyborg is working on the Star Slider when Kory enters.

    CYBORG: Oh, hey Starfire.

    KORY: Hello.

    She crosses over to the Star Slider, waves a hand over it. The cargo hold opens up.

    CYBORG: Whoa.

    Kory pulls out a small box from the cargo hold and exits.


    Cyborg decorates the Christmas tree as Kory walks in.

    KORY: Why are you vandalizing that plant?

    CYBORG: Oh, it's Christmas. Don't you celebrate... of course you don't. Because you're an alien. Right.

    Sneaky music plays as Wally falls in beside Kory.

    WALLY: I knew it was going to come to this. Someone has to teach you the true meaning of Christmas and I'm just the man for the job.

    KORY: What is this… “Christmas”?

    WALLY: Well, a lot of people believe a lot of nice things happened around this time of year. So… they celebrate. Mostly because it’s cold and there’s really nothing better to do.

    KORY: And what do you believe?

    Wally shakes his head.

    WALLY: That you should never put ketchup on a hot dog.

    Donna plants an armful of presents below the tree.

    DONNA: Don't look at me, I celebrate Winter Solstice. We did it first, we did it right.

    KORY: Is there no one here who can tell me what Christmas is all about?

    Suddenly, Raven steps out from behind the Christmas tree.

    RAVEN: Sure, Koriand'r, I can tell you. Lights, please.

    A spotlight shines on Raven.

    RAVEN: "And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the fields, keeping watch over their flocks by night. And lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the lord shone round about them, and they were so afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not, for behold, I bring unto you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you this day is born in the City of Bethlehem, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; you shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel, a multitude of the heavenly host, praising God, and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest, and on Earth peace, good will toward men'". That's what Christmas is all about, Koriand'r.

    Long pause.

    WALLY: Am I the only one freaked out by that?

    DONNA: Not in the slightest.


    The Titans eat Christmas dinner. Small orbs, like olives, are passed around.

    GRAYSON: Kory fixed these. I'm told they're a delicacy on her world.

    KORY: Yes. These are oddans. On my the homeplanet, we believe the best way to honor the prey is with a good hunt. So now we can enjoy the hunt here, in the comfort of my new home!

    The eggs hatch, revealing small tentacled creatures. Grayson stabs at his with a fork.

    KORY: Ah! Dick Grayson has scored first blood! (low) I knew you were a virile and resourceful hunter. (brighter) Please, be the first to partake of the fruit of your hunt.

    GRAYSON: You mean... eat it?

    Kory nods enthusiastically. Grayson reluctantly pops it in his mouth.

    GRAYSON: Just like mom used to make.

    Wally stabs one for Linda at superspeed.

    BEAST BOY: I'm sorry, I can't eat this. It's... uh... not kosher.

    CYBORG: Gar, you're Jewish?

    BEAST BOY: Well, yeah. I thought you guys already knew.

    WALLY: I vote him for treasurer.

    He's immediately pelted with food.

    CYBORG: So, boss man, how long until we get a real job?


    WALLY: Something'll come up.

    GRAYSON: That's right.

    CYBORG: You're supposed to be leading this team... so where the hell are we going? I was told there was going to be some action.

    LINDA: So... Grayson, is it a real hassle leading the team?

    GRAYSON: Not at all.

    WALLY: I think I've lost my appetite.


    Wally stares out at the city as Linda approaches him.

    WALLY: I didn't mean for you to find out this way. Not yet.

    LINDA: Don't tell me you're pulling this macho bull**** again...

    WALLY: Keep your voice down. It's not bull****, I'm the best man for the job and everyone knows it.

    LINDA: You're going to mess this up just like you did with Piper.

    WALLY: What, you still blame me for that? He sold me out! I'm glad he's gone!

    LINDA: I'm not.


    PIPER sits across from the MAN from Flash 2. They're both eating an expensive dinner. We never get a good look at the Man's face, but he seems familiar somehow. Piper wears a gray charcoal suit with a red tie.

    PIPER: You know, I turned on the TV today. This may sound somewhat ungrateful... but Flash is still running around. I thought we were going to take that jackass down.

    MAN: Patience. There are other factors that have to play out before we make our move. And you're being well-paid for your information on his psychology...

    PIPER: This isn't about the money. West is dangerous. The sooner he's out of the picture, the better. I just hope we're not too late.


    Christmas party. Kory watches as Dick gives Barbara a present. She opens it. It's a coffee mug with a phrase on it reading "Old librarians don't die, they just get mis-filed."

    WALLY: I guess it's true what they say. Behind every great man... is a great woman. Too bad for you he's already got his.

    KORY: Maybe you could help me with that.

    WALLY: You want Dick to notice you? Wait a few minutes, than go over to him, point up, and say "Mistletoe."

    KORY: Why?

    WALLY: Just trust me.

    She wanders off. Wally approaches Barbara.

    WALLY: Can I talk with you in private?

    BARBARA: Yeah. Sure.

    As Barbara starts to leave, Wally plants a mistletoe above Grayson at superspeed.


    Wally leads her inside.

    WALLY: We've been having a few problems with the entry system.

    BARBARA: It's simple. Everyone has a simple alphanumeric passcode that grants them entry to the tower.

    WALLY: I know. But sometimes it's jittery.

    Wally lights up.

    BARBARA: I thought you quit smoking.

    WALLY: Is there anything about me you don't know?

    BARBARA: Penis size, maybe.

    Wally coughs.

    WALLY: Well, I'm not going to get into length or girth, let alone heft, but if a poem were to be composed about my penis, it would have to be an EPIC. Plus, I have the ass of an eighteen-year-old wrestler.

    BARBARA: I met with Linda. I asked what you were like.

    WALLY: What'd she tell you?

    BARBARA: She told me you were like most men... only more so.

    WALLY: I'll have to remember that one.

    BARBARA: She seems like a nice girl.

    The unasked question of why he'd want Barbara hangs in the air.

    WALLY: World's full of nice girls.

    BARBARA: You know, it's ridiculous to want something just because it's not yours.

    WALLY: I know. Tell me something, and be honest. What does Dick have that I don't?

    BARBARA: A history.

    WALLY: Of course. You two go way back. Robin and Batgirl. Dick and Barbara. Nightwing and Oracle. You're like high school sweethearts. I can't compete with that.

    BARBARA: Do you even really want to?

    WALLY: I guess we'll never know.

    BARBARA: Go home to your wife, Wally.

    WALLY: That's the first time you've called me that.

    Barbara composes herself a moment... then takes the cigarette from him. She takes a drag off it. Hands it back to him.

    BARBARA: You're a bad influence, West.

    WALLY: So I'm told.


    Kory approaches Grayson, who is standing alone, sipping at a mug of hot cocoa. She points up.

    KORY: Mistletoe.

    GRAYSON: Mistletoe?

    He looks up.

    GRAYSON: Mistletoe. (beat) You know, a mistletoe is deadly if you eat it.

    KORY: No, I did not know that.

    GRAYSON: Well, it's just a fun... fact...

    He kisses her. Pulls away. Ashamed and hopeful at the same time.

    KORY: Why do you place your feeding hole against mine?

    GRAYSON: (loses his nerve) Oh, nothing... it's kinda a way to say hello.


    Cyborg has a few suitcases sitting on the bed. He looks at them as Beast Boy enters.

    BEAST BOY: Hey, we were about to watch Die Hard, wanna come?

    CYBORG: Sure, just give me a minute...

    BEAST BOY: What's with the suitcases?

    CYBORG: Nothing... Die Hard's a Christmas movie?

    BEAST BOY: It is to me.


    Donna critiques Die Hard.

    DONNA: Notice how all the terrorists are foreigners? Textbook fear of the other!

    Wally meets with Linda by the couch.

    LINDA: So, what'd you need to talk to Barbara about?

    WALLY: Just a few hiccups in the computer system. Nothing too important. (beat) Linda, relax. I'm not cheating on you.

    Kory walks up to them.

    KORY: Hello, Wally West!

    She kisses him.

    BEAST BOY: (noticing) It's just not fair.

    KORY: Hello, Linda Park!

    She kisses Linda.

    WALLY: ...I love being on this team.

    Next: The One Where The Titans Go Public
  3. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    In a burst of chalk dust, Wally speed-draws on the chalkboard. The rest of the team is already gathered as Grayson walks in.

    GRAYSON: What's this?

    WALLY: Tupperware party. What do you think? I got us a J-O-B. 'Round your old digs, matter of fact. I figure since you're the leader, we should play on your homefield.

    GRAYSON: And where'd you get this information?

    WALLY: Just some scumbag pushing his poison to kids. No one who'll be missed.

    GRAYSON: And where's this scumbag now?

    Wally smiles enigmatically.

    GRAYSON: County lock-up.

    Wally turns back to the blackboard.

    WALLY: Now, the drug shipment is coming in by boat. We're looking at multiple baddies waiting for us on the harbor, more on the boat. Possible metahuman coverage. I wouldn't ask you to do this if I didn't have confidence in you. Now, any questions?

    BEAST BOY: Yeah. What's that?

    WALLY: That's the whaling station where the dealers will be making the pick-up.

    DONNA: And that?

    WALLY: That's us.

    GRAYSON: And that?

    WALLY: That's a drawing of me as a cowboy. (beat) See, there's my hat and there's a little sheriff badge. It's cute. (beat) You think I should add a lasso?


    The Titans, now in costume (especially Donna, who is now WONDER GIRL), converge on a structure resembling a barn. Smoke rises from boiling kettle drums, a steam engine drives a small conveyor belt endlessly round while giving warmth to a few bums. A giant black cauldron dominates the harbor, fifteen feet high, thirty feet across. We see WOLVER gang members clearing out derelicts and hobos from the structure. The Titans assemble on a rooftop, looking down.

    NIGHTWING: Those are Wolver gang members. They distribute half the drugs in this city.

    FLASH: Then this must be the pick-up.

    BEAST BOY: (re: cauldron) What's that?

    NIGHTWING: Separator. Throw whale blubber in, heat it, separate out the fat.

    BEAST BOY: Ick.

    Nightwing presses his finger to an earpiece built into his cowl.

    NIGHTWING: Oracle, any chance of you getting me satellite coverage?

    BARBARA: (filtered) Negative. Weather forecast shows it's going to be an overcast.

    NIGHTWING: Terrific.

    FLASH: Right, we take out the Wolvers, wait for the ship, we kiss, we schmooze, we carry on, everybody goes home happy. Except, you know, the criminals.

    NIGHTWING: (shakes his head) No, too risky. We hit the Wolvers, the ship crew might notice something's wrong. We wait for them to all be together, then take 'em out in one fell swoop.

    FLASH: That's twice the work for the same pay-off.

    NIGHTWING: That's the way we're doing it. Wonder Girl, Beast Boy, you take the Wolvers. Cyborg, you and I'll take the ship. Flash, you take that truck. If they rabbit, I want you on them.

    FLASH: Might be easier if I had Starfire backing me up.

    NIGHTWING: She's nowhere near ready. Raven, you hang back in case we need assistance. Let's go.


    Later. Headlights cut a swath through the flurry of snow. A CANVAS TRUCK. It parks next to the whaling station. The driver is your average thug, the PASSENGER is all bundled up. Could be trouble.

    The Wolvers begin loading crates onto the back of the truck. The crates are being loaded off a large FREIGHTER.

    We SEE the Titans have taken up positions around the meeting place. We hear their radio chatter over the soundtrack.

    NIGHTWING: (filtered) Beast Boy, you and Wonder Girl in position?

    BEAST BOY: (filtered) Yeah! I mean, roger! Oh, you forgot to say out...

    NIGHTWING: (filtered) Beast Boy?

    BEAST BOY: (filtered) Yeah?

    NIGHTWING: (filtered) Shut up. Flash, how about you?

    Flash has somehow managed to secure himself inside the cauldron. He peeks out at his surroundings through a bullethole, like a sniper waiting for a clean shot.

    FLASH: Just waiting for the word, mon capitan.

    NIGHTWING: (filtered) The word is given.

    The Titans spring into attack. Flash clotheslines a grunt on his way to the truck. Wonder Girl falls upon the Wolvers, leading to an elaborate fight on and around the conveyor belt. Beast Boy turns into a MOUNTAIN GOAT and rams a sailor in the stomach with his horns, than turns around to hind-kick the doubled-over man in the head. Nightwing and Cyborg make a beeline for the freighter, running up the gangplank. The SAILORS open fire with automatic weaponry. Cyborg provides mobile cover for Nightwing, who returns fire by jerking his hands. Devices similar in size and shape to TOENAIL CLIPPERS pop out of a concealed bracelet built into his gloves, then, switchblade-like, they expand into BIRDARANGS (wing-shaped boomerangs) with the flick of a wrist.

    Inside the truck, the Passenger's knitcap bursts into flames, as does his entire HEAD, as he blasts Flash in the shoulder with a FIREBALL. Flash spins into the air, flying backwards into a pile of trash cans. He picks a banana peel off his head.

    FLASH: Bit of a hothead, aren't you?

    Wonder Girl takes out the last man with a spinning heel kick, just as another group of Wolvers open fire from behind a SHACK. She hurries to deflect them with her gauntlets. The ricochets burrow harmlessly into the shack. She's quickly being overwhelmed. BEAST BOY transforms into a rhino and RAMS one of the cauldron's legs. The unbalanced cauldron tips over onto the shack, sending the remaining Wolvers scrambling. Beast Boy stampedes them into the drink before turning back into his human form.

    BEAST BOY: Looks like you guys are all washed-up.

    A bullet splashes against his chest. He looks up. A SNIPER on the ship.

    BEAST BOY: Aww carp.

    He drops. The sniper is about to finish him off when...

    CYBORG: No!

    He grabs Nightwing and, without hesitation, THROWS HIM! Nightwing covers the distance between gangplank and sniper, twisting into a picture-perfect MISSILE DROPKICK. The sniper takes it hard in the chest, falling backwards into the open cargo hold. Nightwing draws twin escrima sticks from scabbards on his back and goes to town on the sailors.


    As we speed forward like a locomotive at 500 mph, dodging in and out of traffic, the sides of the world blurring into hyperrealistic streaks. Our yellow-gloved hands reach up and grab on to the ladder on the back of a EIGHTEEN-WHEELER.

    Flash pulls himself up onto the trailer. The CANVAS TRUCK is right alongside. Flash jumps onto it.


    The Driver hears the thump of Flash's landing.

    DRIVER: Go check that out.

    Hothead peeks out the window. Flash grabs him by the collar and pulls him up onto the roof.

    FLASH: Henry Kissinger says Merry Christmas!


    Flash and Hothead trade blows. Flash punches Hothead in the face, burning his hand.

    HOTHEAD: Ha!

    Flash kicks him in the gut, doubling him over, then pulls his belt away and wraps it around his knuckles. He blasts Hothead in the jaw, sending him flying off the truck.

    FLASH: Ha yourself.

    He goes to confront the driver as we pan over to reveal Hothead is clinging to the side of the truck!


    A double-palm from Nightwing sends a sailor crashing into a crate. EIGHT LONG, DARK LEGS emerge from it. A huge, monstrous MAN-SPIDER pulls itself out, fangs dripping with venom..

    FLASH: (filtered) Alert, I just ran into a metahuman. There may be more of them, so be on your guard.

    Nightwing clicks his earpiece.

    NIGHTWING: (deadpan) Thanks for the tip.


    CAPTAIN: (over intercom) Get us out of here! Engines, full ahead!

    Cyborg crashes through the wall. RIPS the engine out. The ENGINEER stares in shock.

    CYBORG: Now, are you going to be a good little criminal and surrender or am I going to have to get rough?


    Nightwing duels with the Man-Spider, dodging between crates to avoid its attacks. He lunges in and delivers a stinging chop to its midsection, then jumps away seconds before its jaws clamp down on him. He throws a Birdarang backwards, chopping off one of its limbs. The enraged Man-Spider hits him with a gob of webbing and begins reeling him in...


    Flash is leaning over the side of the cab.

    FLASH: (to driver) Pull over or I will put your country-fried bumpkin ass in the ground!

    Suddenly he hears Hothead swing back onto the roof. Hothead tries to tackle him. Flash catches him in a headlock, but nearly goes over the side. Flames lick at his armpit. He knees Hothead in the stomach and walks him forward, then DDTs him. Hothead's cranium burns through the roof of the cab.

    Flash kicks Hothead off the truck, then whips his belt down. The belt wraps around the steering wheel and Flash uses it to pull the truck off-course. Pedestrians jumps out of the way as the truck roars onto the sidewalk and CRASHES into a subway entrance, Flash is thrown from the cab. He lands on his feet and grinds down the icy sidewalk before grabbing onto a lamppost, bringing himself to a swinging stop.

    FLASH: (singing) What a wonderful feeling, I'm happy again!

    The driver, not wearing a seatbelt, crashes through the windshield, over the turnstile, comes to a stop. Flash walks down the opposite entrance.

    FLASH: Arrest that man!

    COP: On what charge?

    FLASH: Didn't you see? He jumped the turnstile.


    The Man-Spider has Nightwing completely cocooned in webbing. It holds him high, like a war trophy, when...

    STARFIRE: (O.S.) Take your unusually high number of hands off of him!

    The Man-Spider looks up with its compound eyes to see STARFIRE flying in, back in her battle armor.

    STARFIRE: One move and I swear to X'Hal and the Warlords of Okaara that death will be your only reward!

    The Man-Spider throws Nightwing into the water. Starfire tries to catch him, but arrives too late. He SINKS beneath the waves.

    STARFIRE: You foul creature! Taste Tamaranian justice!

    She fires a STARBOLT through its chest, leaving a grisly hole. The Man-Spider falls over, dead.

    STARFIRE: A life for a life. You are dead, monster! And I would have it no other way.


    On Nightwing, imprisoned in webbing, sinking deeper. His lips are turning blue. He's a goner. His face impassive, accepting. Then he frowns in apprehension.

    Looking up at the moon shining down through the water. A DARK SPECK is growing exponitentally. It grows into RAVEN, her cloak swirling around her. It sweeps towards us, engulfing the totality of our vision...


    Raven teleports in. Her cloak pulls back to reveal Nightwing on the ground, totally dry and now without the webbing covering him. The warmth quickly returns to his features.

    NIGHTWING: What the... how?

    Raven is already moving off to BEAST BOY, who lies on the ground. Flash has returned and is applying pressure to the wound.

    BEAST BOY: I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die a virgin...

    FLASH: Rule number one. Nobody dies.

    Raven motions him off, then places a finger on Beast Boy's wound.

    RAVEN: Azarath metrion zinthos.

    She stiffens, cringing in pain.

    RAVEN: His pain flows into me... his suffering becomes my own... there is much agony, for life is agony...

    She pulls her finger away. The wound is gone, leaving only a hole in Beast Boy's costume.

    FLASH: All that mystery and she's a goddamn human Band-Aid.

    BEAST BOY: Uhhh... everyone pretend you didn't hear the last part about me being a virgin.

    FLASH: Chill, we already knew.

    BEAST BOY: You did?

    FLASH: Dude, you're not fooling anyone.

    Wonder Girl rushes onto the scene. She kneels down to cradle Beast Boy in her arms.

    WONDER GIRL: Are you alright?

    BEAST BOY: (milking it) Oh, the pain...

    WONDER GIRL: C'mon, get up...

    BEAST BOY: I must be paralyzed.

    WONDER GIRL: Convenient position.

    FLASH: Just relax, kid. You did great.

    NIGHTWING: No, you didn't. You were sloppy and you ignored all your training.

    FLASH: Hey, lay off him.

    NIGHTWING: He needs to know...

    FLASH: I said leave him alone! (quieter) He's just a boy.

    NIGHTWING: If he keeps acting like that, he'll never be a man.

    BEAST BOY: I can hear you, you know.

    STARFIRE: (O.S.) Nightwing! You are the alive!

    She lands and scoops Nightwing up in a bone-crunching EMBRACE.

    NIGHTWING: Kory, ribs! Ribs!

    FLASH: There's a condom joke in there somewhere, but I just can't find it.

    Starfire puts Nightwing down.

    NIGHTWING: I thought we left you back at the Tower.

    STARFIRE: You did. I followed you.

    FLASH: Well, she knows too much. I guess we'll just have to kill her.

    Kory raises a fistful of starbolt.

    FLASH: Easy there! That was a joke, your worship. Geez, even in outer space women don't have a sense of humor.


    FLASH: My point exactly.

    Cyborg, entering, drops the Man-Spider's corpse to the ground.

    CYBORG: Seriously, giant spiders?

    WONDER GIRL: Probably an escapee from Tartarus, from the looks of him. Wonder Woman told me all about them.

    FLASH: You know Wonder Woman?

    WONDER GIRL: (indulgent smile) Do you know the real Flash?

    FLASH: (dangerous) I am the real Flash.

    RAVEN: Just so the rest of you know, the press has arrived.

    FLASH: I think Raven might be something that rhymes with *****.

    RAVEN: I prefer "shaman."

    BEAST BOY: Hey Flash.

    FLASH: Yeah?

    BEAST BOY: Don't squeeze the shaman.

    They high-five over the joke. Flash pulls Beast Boy to his feet.

    FLASH: Well, let's go meet our adoring public.

    RAVEN: Not me. I don't photograph well.

    She disappears.

    FLASH: Well alrighty then, sister.


    A makeshift podium has already been set up. Thank you, Basma. The Teen Titans take the stage. Handel's "Messiah" plays as flashbulbs go off, capturing every angle for posterity. The place is packed with cameramen, reporters, and photographers. Flash punches Cyborg on the chest.

    FLASH: Merry Christmas. We're going to make the evening news.

    Nightwing takes a microphone, stands at the podium. Every camera focuses on him.

    NIGHTWING: At approximately 9:37 PM, an illegal transaction was scheduled between members of the Wolver gang and an unknown drug cartel...

    REPORTER 1: Who are you specifically?

    NIGHTWING: My name is Nightwing...

    REPORTER 2: Are you associated with the Justice League?

    REPORTER 3: What are your superpowers?

    REPORTER 4: Do you work for the government?

    NIGHTWING: At this time, we have no affiliation with either...

    REPORTER 5: At this team, your team is composed mainly of Caucasians. Is this intentional or do you plan to have more equal-opportunity hiring practices in the future?

    NIGHTWING: We didn't hire... I mean, we're not all white. Starfire doesn't even count, she's an alien!

    That sets off a whole new barrage of questions. Nightwing dries up with STAGE FRIGHT. Flash quickly steps in, taking the microphone.

    FLASH: What my intrepid collegue was trying to say is that we are the Teen Titans... the NEW Teen Titans, as in "new and improved." This is Cyborg, he can do all kinds of Autobot things. Starfire can fly and use her starbolts with deadly accuracy. Wonder Girl has the super-strength and agility of her elder counterpart. Beast Boy can transform into any animal. And Nightwing, with the power of heart! You can rest knowing we've got your back.

    He begins walking the stage, working the crowd like a pro.

    FLASH: The Justice League? Well, if anyone was wondering what life was like before the internal combustion engine... ask those guys. The superhero community needs fresh blood. Fresh ideas. Fresh flavor, too, but that's not my field. Sure, we're young, but so was that one guy and that person who totally did that thing, you know the one I'm talking about. What matters is we're not set in our ways, we're not afraid to speak our minds... (re: Nightwing) well, except for pancho back there... and we're here to stay. My boys are here to insure that the tragic events of last fall never happen again. So in case a bunch of supervillains decide to throw a pow-wow, I'll have these upstanding heroes backing me up, so I can give some unlucky bastard 100% of the quality ass-kicking he has coming. Now when there's trouble, you know who to call. Anything else, please see our press release. It will be faxed over to you in no time flat. Peace.

    He drops the microphone Eddie Murphy style, then throws up the horns and walks away. The Titans follow him. As they wade through the press, Nightwing pulls up next to him.

    NIGHTWING: What was that all about? I'm supposed to be...

    FLASH: Did I ever say you weren't? You can only make a first impression once, Moonwing, and no way I'm going to let us be replayed ad nausem on CNN with a lead of you braying like a jackass. Now, sure, when it comes to tactics, you're number one with a bullet, but I know how to work the system, play the politics. That's why I had my publicist get all these people here. (shaking hand with fan) Hi, how are ya...

    NIGHTWING: You invited these people here?

    FLASH: A few well-placed anonymous tips, a little gossip in the right ear... it all adds up, Deathwing.

    NIGHTWING: It's Nightwing and you know it.

    FLASH: Nightwing? Nineties are over, buddy, anytime you want to join us in the new millenium is fine by me. Listen, you've got a lot to offer. With my expertise and your... whatever, we can put this team on the map! Big time.

    BEAST BOY: (over his shoulder) Like Justice League big?

    FLASH: Stop thinking small.

    Next: Downtime
  4. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Edgar stares out the barred windows. Nightwing descends on a de-cel line, hangs outside the bars.

    NIGHTWING: You were holding out on me. That shipment was big news.

    EDGAR: People already suspect I snitch for you. If I gave you that shipment, I would've been a dead man! I still am! Prison showers, man!

    NIGHTWING: We had an arrangement. You only sell to junkies, I leave you in peace. Selling to kids, Edgar. Not good.

    EDGAR: Hey man, I have bills! You get me out of here! You promised no one would touch me if I worked for you!

    NIGHTWING: That was before you sold in schoolyards. Goodbye Edgar.

    EDGAR: I'll expose you! I'll tell everyone what you're doing!

    NIGHTWING: And who's going to believe you?

    He swings off. Flash steps out of the shadows, staring at Edgar through the cell door.

    FLASH: I'll give you this, Edgar. You may be a sleazeball and a drug dealer, but at least you're honest. You admit you're a sleazeball and a drug dealer.

    EDGAR: Don't tell me you're going to leave me in here too!

    FLASH: You catch on fast. I'll see what I can do about transferring you to Iron Heights. The warden's a friend of mine. He'll keep you alive... not that you'll like it much.

    EDGAR: Hey, we had a deal!

    FLASH: I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it any further.


    Wally, shirtless, flips through various evening news shows. His introductory speech is on most of them. Linda comes in with a bottle of burn ointment.

    LINDA: It was behind the calamine lotion.

    Linda squirts some on her hand and rubs it where Hothead burned him. Wally winces.

    LINDA: Six superheroes watching your back and you still come home looking like this. You wonder why I worry...

    WALLY: Well, you know me. Fools rush in...

    LINDA: Wasn't the President supposed to speak tonight?

    WALLY: Yeah... they bumped him. Ouch, it burns.

    LINDA: Give it a minute. It'll feel better.

    Wally turns his attention back to the TV.

    WALLY: The sweet taste of success. This is better than sex.

    LINDA: Hey!

    WALLY: I was speaking metaphorically, dear.

    He kisses her hand.

    WALLY: Make no mistake. 2006 is the year of the Titans.


    The Beatles' "A Hard Day's Night" plays as Flash, Nightwing, Cyborg, and Beast Boy run away from a horde of SCREAMING FANGIRLS. They crest a hill, jump in perfect Ferris Bueller formation.

    CUT TO three phone booths. The fangirls run past.

    Close on the first phone booth. Flash steps out of it.

    PAN left to the second phone booth. Nightwing steps out.

    PAN left to the third phone booth. SUPERMAN steps out and flies away.

    PAN back to Flash and Nightwing. They look at each other and shrug.

    CUT TO two men sitting on a bench, reading newspapers. The fangirls run up to them. They lower the newspapers. It's Beast Boy and Cyborg, wearing fake beards. They point left. The fangirls run that way. Beast Boy and Cyborg raise their newspapers again.

    CUT TO the male Titans walking across the street in a visual homage to the Abbey Road album cover.

    CUT TO the Titans boarding a train as it pulls out of the station.


    Flash is sitting across from an ELDERLY MAN.

    ELDERLY MAN: Now, I recommend putting most of your money in T-bills...

    Nightwing enters the compartment.

    NIGHTWING: Flash, can I borrow you for a minute? If you're busy, I can come back later.

    FLASH: Oh, no, go ahead, I don't even know this guy.

    He stands up and leaves with Nightwing. The Elderly Man turns to camera.

    ELDERLY MAN: How rude. I'm so offended that I'm breaking the fourth wall, right now.

    NEW ANGLE shows us that he's really talking to BEAST BOY.

    BEAST BOY: Yeah, that's great, but I really should be going with my friends.


    Flash and Nightwing walk down the corridor, Beast Boy trailing behind them.

    NIGHTWING: Vic's in a funk. Maybe you can shake him out of it.

    FLASH: Wait, why me?

    NIGHTWING: Kory's from outer space, Donna's an Amazon, Raven's a witch, I was raised by a man who dresses up like a bat, and Gar's... Gar.

    BEAST BOY: Hey!

    NIGHTWING: You're the most normal person on the team... I just realized how frightening that is.


    The three lads walk in on Cyborg, who's sitting on a large suitcase forlornly.

    FLASH: What seems to be the problem, Cy?

    Cyborg flexes his metal hand.

    FLASH: I don't follow.

    HEIDI, an incredible Swedish blonde, walks by.

    HEIDI: Hullo, vould you like to join me vere the group sex later?

    FLASH: Yeah, that'd be great.

    HEIDI: Alright, (points at Cyborg) everyone but you. The hideous ugly freak I'm pointing at. Okey-dokey, see you later at the orgy!

    FLASH: See you. (back to Cyborg) So, what's troubling you?

    Cyborg shoots Flash a look as Beast Boy and Nightwing look at each other in disbelief.

    CYBORG: You can't tell?

    FLASH: I was just being polite, I'm not really going to an orgy. I like my sex like I like my basketball. One on one with as little dribbling as possible.

    Cyborg sighs.

    CYBORG: No matter how much of a hero I am, I'll still be a freak. That'll always be the first thing people notice about me. Except for that time I had the fake beard on.

    BEAST BOY: Yeah, now that you mention it, that made no sense.

    FLASH: Look, Cyborg, it's not who you are on the outside the matters... (pause for dramatic effect) it's who you are on the inside.

    Cyborg looks up, brightening.

    CYBORG: Gee, I never thought about it that way.

    NIGHTWING: (disbelievingly) That's it?

    BEAST BOY: Yup. Well, let's jam!

    He takes a guitar from a steamer trunk, begins strumming it. Playing the Beatles' "If I Fell."

    BEAST BOY: If I fell in love with you
    Would you promise to be true
    And help me understand
    'cause I've been in love before
    And I found that love was more
    Than just holding hands.

    Cyborg joins in, grabbing his own instrument from the trunk. Beast Boy hands the guitar to Flash, who takes over. Beast Boy and Nightwing take instruments, rounding the band out. The song really swings.

    ALL: If I give my heart to you
    I must be sure
    From the very start
    That you would love me more than her.
    If I trust in you oh please
    Don't run and hide
    If I love you too oh please
    Don't hurt my pride like her
    'cause I couldn't stand the pain
    And I would be sad if our new love was in vain.
    So I hope you see that I
    Would love to love you
    And that she will cry
    When she learns we are two.
    If I fell in love with you

    Hands beat at the windows. SCREAMING FANS are outside, going crazy.


    The fans run alongside the train. The train goes into a tunnel. They run headlong into the wall as the song wraps up.

    NIGHTWING: (O.S.) Wonder what the girls are up to?


    Raven, Donna, and Kory run through a field as "Can't Buy Me Love" plays.


    Cardinal Syn stands at the center of the amphitheater. The followers are all bowing on their hands and knees.

    CARDINAL SYN: Everyone, now rise and pray with Brother Blood.

    BROTHER BLOOD: No. Not yet. There are some amongst us who have no right to pray in our midst. We have SINNERS here. Look into your damned souls and you will know who you are. You will see the hell your soul has been condemned to! The only salvation is complete obsequinqusness to the demands of your God, Brother Blood. William Loring, rise and confess your sins!

    A YOUNG MAN stands.

    YOUNG MAN: Brother Blood, I was wrong! Forgive me! I wanted to go home to my parents!

    BROTHER BLOOD: Will you pay penance?

    YOUNG MAN: I will! I'll do anything!

    BROTHER BLOOD: Good, William. For the next six months your labors here shall be increased twofold. Now kneel. Wendy Flethcer, rise and confess your sins.

    A YOUNG WOMAN stands angrily.

    YOUNG WOMAN: I haven't sinned, I've seen the truth! You're not a god, you're not even a religion! You're a devil!

    BROTHER BLOOD: And you are a blasphemer!

    He points at her. What appears to be a lightning bolt made of fire... HOLYFIRE... leaps from his fingers and INCINERATES HER. Brother Blood steps away as Cardinal Syn takes the stand again.

    CARDINAL SYN: And now everyone put your hands together for our mascot, Bloody the Red Blood Cell!

    A MASCOT dressed as a red blood cell comes out and does some gymnastics to the driving techno beat of "Y'All Ready For This?" The crowd thunders its approval.


    Wally picks on a guitar idly, sitting on the staircase as Beast Boy walks by.

    BEAST BOY: Hey, didn't know you played.

    WALLY: In high school. Lifetime ago. Before I was...

    He holds the Flash ring up.

    BEAST BOY: Married?

    WALLY: A superhero. I dreamed about being...

    He throws up the "rock out" sign.

    WALLY: A rock star.

    BEAST BOY: Hey, who doesn't?

    Beast Boy moves on as Wally begins playing.

    WALLY: I love to hate the days when my hair's unkempt, my face unshaven.
    The looks I'll get at the mall make me feel so inhuman.
    Wait! Hang up the phone. I'll leave Neiman-Marcus alone. I won't eat your baby, I definitely may need a shave.

    Cyborg walks down the stairs.

    WALLY: I know I look so bad but I promise you I'm going home soon.
    I won't affect your sales. I'm not a bum. I just look like one.
    Wait! Hang up the phone. I'll leave Nordstrom all alone. I won't eat your baby. I definitely should have shaved.

    Cyborg takes the guitar from Wally, smashes it against the wall, then hands what's left back to Wally.

    CYBORG: Sorry.

    Wally stands with a sour look on his face.

    WALLY: (sarcastic) Thanks.

    His cell rings. He answers it.


    Wally, dressed in a sweatshirt with the hood up, walks through the shadows.

    WALLY: Hello? You said you wanted to meet with me...

    A noise startles him. He turns to see a cat running off.

    WALLY: Well, this isn't at all forebod...

    Suddenly, a KNIFE pierces through his chest. He looks down at it, realizing he's been stabbed in the back. He falls to his knees, looks over his shoulder to see NIGHTWING standing over him.

    WALLY: I knew it would be you.

    Nightwing reaches forward and SNAPS HIS NECK.


    Grayson snaps awake, the sound of Wally's spine snapping echoing in his brain.


    Grayson works out on a punching bag as Donna talks to them. Grayson is sweating heavily, pushing himself too far.

    DONNA: You're determined to hurt yourself, aren't you?

    GRAYSON: I'm doing just fine, Donna.

    DONNA: Physically, you're right. Mentally, you're torturing yourself to achieve some ideal that's impossible to reach.

    GRAYSON: I don't know what you're talking about.

    DONNA: You'll never be the Batman, Dick. Do you know why? Because you're not psychotic. And that's a good thing.

    GRAYSON: Neither of us is psychotic. Or maybe we all are. Leave me alone.

    DONNA: Dick, there's absolutely no one I'm closer to in these... "new Titans" than you. I can't let this go. I care too much. You're driving yourself insane. You're trying to do it all, but you can't. I hate to be the one to let you in on this, but you're only human. Walking a beat, working with the Batman whenever he calls, and now us? You've set yourself an impossible challenge.

    GRAYSON: I appreciate your concern...

    DONNA: And even if, by some miracle, you pull it off, it won't bring your parents back.

    Grayson kicks the bag so hard it bursts open, sand spilling out onto the floor in a growing mountain.

    GRAYSON: (angrily) I can do this! (beat, softer) I have to.

    Donna goes to the door.

    DONNA: Okay, I won't push... not tonight, anyway. Just take care of yourself. And talk to someone.

    GRAYSON: Sure. Take care.


    Grayson nukes a glass of milk in the microwave. As he waits, he crosses over to a drawer. Pulls it open. Inside is a rolled-up poster. He unravels it. An advertisement for Haley's Circus, headlined by the FLYING GRAYSONS. Mom, Dad... and inbetween them, the young boy Dick Grayson once was.

    The microwave beeping jolts him out of his reverie. He rolls the poster back up and replaces it.

    KORY: (O.S.) Are you the alright?

    GRAYSON: Yeah, I'm fine. Kory...

    KORY: (O.S.) Yes Dick Grayson?

    GRAYSON: You forgot your clothes again.

    KORY: (O.S.) Oh.

    We hear her walking off. Grayson turns to see Beast Boy staring at him.

    BEAST BOY: Why must you ruin it for the rest of us?

    Nightwing squints his eyes.


    Beast Boy runs off. Kory returns, now dressed in gym shorts and a "We Love Gar" T-shirt with a picture of Beast Boy's face and an arrow pointing downwards.

    KORY: Do you like my clothing?

    GRAYSON: (trying hard not to laugh) It's... very fashionable.

    KORY: It is hard to assemble proper Tamaranian clothing with your primitive Earth fabrics, but I try my best. Dick Grayson?

    GRAYSON: Yeah?

    KORY: Why are you always so... alone?

    GRAYSON: It's who I am.

    Kory sits down next to him.

    KORY: No. It is not.

    GRAYSON: Well, then it's who Batman is.

    KORY: You are not Batman.

    Grayson sips his milk.

    GRAYSON: Tell me about it.

    KORY: Well, for one thing there is a vast difference in age, for another, your name is Dick Grayson, while his is Batman...

    GRAYSON: Kory, stop. It's just an expression.

    KORY: Oh. You have most unusual expressions here. Sometimes "bad" means "good" and your name means penis.

    Grayson chokes on his milk.

    KORY: Why are people always doing that around me?

    GRAYSON: Kory, there are certain things about Earth you just... can't pick up overnight.

    KORY: Why do you and the man of bats not get along anymore?

    GRAYSON: We have... you wouldn't be interested.

    KORY: If I were not interested, I would not ask.

    GRAYSON: Well, I want to be... more than just Nightwing. I want to have friends, a job, a life... he just wants the Mission. Just because I don't want to be some creature of the night, Abu Gharib mega-badass, he thinks I don't have what it takes to survive.

    KORY: I understand. On the battle plains of U'Tar, the elders thought us weak when we refused to partake of blood from the Grrpl'tox's skull before the hunt. But when we put fire to their villages... then they did not think us so weak!

    GRAYSON: It's strange, you're the only one I can talk to and you're an alien. That's irony for you.

    KORY: Irony? What is this irony? Tell me more of it.

    GRAYSON: It's a bit hard to explain. Maybe later.

    KORY: Later, then. (beat) Why are you afraid all the time?

    Grayson washes his glass out, then dries it with a towel.

    GRAYSON: Something... happened to me, a long time ago. Something bad. And ever since then, I've been trying to convince myself that it wasn't my fault, that there was nothing I could do. But I could've. I could've... You wouldn't understand.

    KORY: My parents sold me into slavery. I understand.

    GRAYSON: I'm sorry, I didn't know...

    Kory puts a hand on his shoulder.

    KORY: What did you do about it?

    GRAYSON: I don't know yet. Try to move on, get on with my life... I guess.

    He puts the glass in the dishwasher.

    GRAYSON: It's late, we should be getting to bed. (heads her off) Our own beds.

    KORY: (disappointed) Oh.

    The phone rings. Grayson picks it up.

    GRAYSON: Hello?

    BARBARA: (filtered) Nightwing, Oracle. My system just flagged an entry in the police databases.

    GRAYSON: It can wait until morning.

    BARBARA: No, Dick. It can't.

    Next: Carpe nox
  5. bored One Sexy Lemur

    Sep 18, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Good times.
  6. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Grayson goes to the computer, taps a flashing tab in the corner. Immediately a mugshot and criminal record comes up... BOSS ZUCCO, a petty mobster in a pinstrip suit. Grayson stares at the monitor, eyes welling with emotion.

    GRAYSON: Zucco...


    ELEVEN-YEAR-OLD DICK GRAYSON is cleaning out the animal cages. We hear a commotion from the MANAGER'S OFFICE.

    ZUCCO: (O.S.) C'mon Haley, it's not like I'm asking you to change the name to Zucco Circus.

    HALEY: (O.S.) I don't pay protection money, Mr. Zucco. I never have, I never will.

    BOSS ZUCCO is led out by the CIRCUS STRONGMAN.

    ZUCCO: You're going to rememer this day, Haley! You'll live to regret it!

    He sees a billboard foy the Flying Graysons.

    ZUCCO: So that's your star attraction, huh? Be a shame if something happened to them. What with them being way up there... and the ground being all the way down here.


    Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Nightwing crouch on the roof of a building. Nightwing uses a scope to look at the building across the street. We see from his POV as he clicks on infrared and sees several heat signatures.

    NIGHTWING: That's them.

    He clicks off infrared and zooms in on the window.

    NIGHTWING: Now just need to confirm...

    BEAST BOY: So, if you could bang any supervillain, who would it be?

    NIGHTWING: ...what?

    BEAST BOY: You know, take a little walk on the dark side. (suggestively) Oh, you KNOW... One of your rogues calls you up, tells you she wants a conjugal visit...

    NIGHTWING: I'd think it was a trap.

    BEAST BOY: But if it wasn't...

    NIGHTWING: It would be.

    BEAST BOY: But if it wasn't...

    NIGHTWING: It would be.

    BEAST BOY: But if it WASN'T.

    Nightwing shakes his head.

    NIGHTWING: This is juvenile.

    BEAST BOY: It's called fun, Dick. Lighten up and answer the question.

    NIGHTWING: You first.

    BEAST BOY: Easy. Cheetah.

    CYBORG: But she's got FUR.

    BEAST BOY: Dude, so do I!

    NIGHTWING: Think I got something! No, isn't him.

    BEAST BOY: So c'mon Nightwing, what about you? Magpie, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy...

    NIGHTWING: Poison Ivy has the power to exude toxins through physical contact.

    BEAST BOY: So let me get this straight... she kisses you and her lips are poison?

    NIGHTWING: Yeah.

    BEAST BOY: Geez, no wonder Bats has issues with women.

    NIGHTWING: Batman does not have issues with women... he has issues with everyone.

    CYBORG: Batman doesn't HAVE issues, Batman IS issues.

    Nightwing applies camoflage over his face in dark tiger stripes.

    CYBORG: You got a hot date? Cause that does nothing for your complexion.

    BEAST BOY: Hey, what about Catwoman? Man, I'd love to scratch behind her ears...

    NIGHTWING: Dude. Batman has a thing for her. That's like two steps away from my mom.

    BEAST BOY: Are you crazy?! Batman's probably listening RIGHT NOW!

    CYBORG: Old Bats ever tell you to make yourself scarce when she came by?

    NIGHTWING: Only every time.

    CYBORG: What about your rogues? Pass me that Lady Vic? English accent, rowr...

    NIGHTWING: Why can't you do this with Flash?

    BEAST BOY: His Rogues are all Barry Allen's hand-me-downs.

    CYBORG: Hey, what about Tarantula?

    Nightwing grips the scope a bit tighter.

    NIGHTWING: She's... not a rogue. Got him!

    Through Nightwing's scope, we see BOSS ZUCCO standing in the window.

    CYBORG: So, who is this guy anyway?

    NIGHTWING: A loose end that needs to be tied.

    Nightwing takes a small box from a compartment on his sleeve, fiddles with it. When he turns back to the others, he has GLOWING GREEN EYES.

    BEAST BOY: ...Dick, I don't think that's the best way to get Kory to notice you.

    NIGHTWING: Nightvision contact lenses. State-of-the-bleeding-art.

    BEAST BOY: How come mom and dad get you all the cool toys?

    NIGHTWING: You provide a distraction. Zucco's mine.


    An old warehouse. Beast Boy and Cyborg stumble into the loading area like two old drinking buddies.

    CYBORG: Me, I'd go for Scandal.

    NIGHTWING: Isn't she a lesbian?

    CYBORG: Not after she meets me.

    A GUARD rushes up to stop them.

    GUARD: Hey man, you can't come in...

    Beast Boy changes into an ELEPHANT and wraps his trunk around the guard's neck.

    BEAST BOY: Don't forget to pack your trunk.

    He flings the guard into a wall!


    Some more GUARDS hear the commotion and run out of the room. Nightwing crawls in through a window. He draws several small LISTENING DEVICES from a pouch on his boot. Begins planting them around the room.


    ZUCCO is meeting with several other CRIMINALS. He hears a commotion from outside, looks out the window.


    Beast Boy as an elephant and Cyborg are going to town on every comer.

    BEAST BOY: Catman.

    CYBORG: Cat... man?

    BEAST BOY: Yeah, if I had to do it with a man, if my life like totally depended on it, I'd want to do it with Catman.

    CYBORG: Can you think of many situations where your life would depend on gay sex?

    BEAST BOY: (defensively) I can think of a few, yeah!


    The criminals exit Zucco's office. NIGHTWING hides in the rafters. He adjusts something on his wrist mike and whispers into it. His whispers are broadcast and AMPLIFIED through the listening devices. It seems like people are all around the criminals, whispering. The criminals draw guns and aim at the wall, trying to make out shapes in the shadows. Nightwing drops unnoticed to the floor in their midst and slowly rises...


    More fighting.

    BEAST BOY: Oh, I've got one! Silver Banshee!

    CYBORG: Can't she kill you just by looking at you?

    BEAST BOY: She won't be able to look at me where I'm coming from.

    CYBORG: You're sick.

    Someone fires at Cyborg. He deflects the bullet back, taking the shooter out.

    CYBORG: Whoa. Didn't know I could do that. You think he's going to be okay?


    Boss Zucco is taking money out of a large safe and planting it in a briefcase. When he closes the safe door, Nightwing's there.

    ZUCCO: Where the hell did you come from!?

    NIGHTWING: From you. You made me when you ordered my parents killed.

    ZUCCO: Hey, you can't just accuse someone without proof...

    He quick-draws a gun and fires at Nightwing, who ducks behind the safe. Nightwing jumps out from behind the safe, throwing a Birdarang which knocks Zucco's gun out of his hands. Nightwing strides over to Zucco and slams him against the wall, choking him.

    NIGHTWING: You hired someone to hit Haley's Circus. Who was it?

    ZUCCO: Jesus, that? That was like ten years ago! I-I-I don't remember!


    ZUCCO: He'll kill me if I tell.

    NIGHTWING: I'll kill you worse!

    ZUCCO: Just like you killed Blockbuster?

    This surprises Nightwing, giving Zucco the chance to break free. He makes a run for it.


    Zucco runs through the backalleys, Nightwing relentlessly following him.

    NIGHTWING: (O.S.) The world isn't big enough to hide from me, Zucco!

    Zucco sees a GANG shooting dice ahead. He runs up to them.

    ZUCCO: Guys, you've got to help me! Nightwing's after me! He says I killed his parents!

    CROOK 1: You iced Nightwing's parents? No way!

    ZUCCO: It's true. Nightwing just told me who he is! He became Nighting because of what I did!

    The Crooks begin drawing guns.

    CROOK 1: So you're the reason for Nightwing... the guy who sent me up the river!

    CROOK 2: You're responsible for the guy who broke up my number rackets!

    ZUCCO: Wait, wait!

    They fire on Zucco, drilling him into the wall.

    CROOK 3: You idiots! You shot him before he told us who Nightwing is!

    They run up to Zucco.

    CROOK 3: Who is he? Who is Nightwing!?

    ZUCCO: His parents were...

    Birdarangs pick off the Crooks, knocking them out. Nightwing drops down next to Zucco.

    NIGHTWING: Who was it, Zucco? Who killed my parents?

    Zucco spits blood on Nightwing and laughs... then his head lolls to the side, eyes glazed over.

    Next: Consequences
  7. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Cyborg and Beast Boy watch as the guards are led into cop cars.

    BEAST BOY: They must've thought it was white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?

    CYBORG: No man, it ain't white boy day.

    A POLICEMAN approaches him.

    POLICEMAN: You've done it again, Titans. Say, can I have an autograph? It's for my niece.

    CYBORG: Well, I don't know if we really...

    Beast Boy has already pulled a headshot out of his pants and is holding a pen.

    BEAST BOY: Who should I make it out to?

    POLICEMAN: ...Dave.

    A BLACK GUARD is ushered past them. As he's shoved into the paddywagon...

    BLACK GUARD: Way to turn on a brother, Cyborg!

    CYBORG: You're not my brother.

    BLACK GUARD: Whatever you say, Oreo.

    POLICEMAN: Get him out of here!

    The doors slam shut on the Black Guard. Cyborg watches as the paddywagon drives off.

    BEAST BOY: Did he just call you an Oreo? That's about the least insulting insult I've ever...

    CYBORG: It means black on the outside, white on the inside. Soon as a brother makes good, life becomes a game of "blacker-than-thou." Way it always has been, way it always will be.

    He walks off, depressed. Beast Boy goes after him.

    BEAST BOY: Actually, an Oreo isn't all-black on the outside. The top and bottom are black, but you can see some white on the sides. The whole metaphor falls apart. Unless we're talking about one of those fudge-covered Oreos. Those are good, even if they are like a kick to the heart from a mule. Now a Coconut, that's brown on the outside, white on the inside. Not as poetic, but we Europeans aren't that white, we're more of a pinkish-tan color. The crayon companies call it flesh-tone, but we all know that's because Big Crayon is controlled by whitie.


    The next day. Wally walks in. We see the Titans have added some new trophies since we've last seen the room. Linda is braiding Beast Boy's hair. He shoots them a Death Glare.

    BEAST BOY: ...I was weak.

    WALLY: Out.

    Beast Boy runs off. Wally looks at Linda.

    LINDA: What? He looks good!

    WALLY: Linda, could you please refrain from doing my world-saving team of badasses' hair? Now, what'd you want to see me about?

    LINDA: Remember how you told me to tell my sources to keep an eye out for anything relating to your teammates' secret identities?

    WALLY: Yeah. Important to squelch any leaks before they happen.

    LINDA: Well, I've got something. A mobster named Boss Zucco was killed last night.

    WALLY: So?

    LINDA: On his rap sheet, it says he was a prime suspect in the murder of John and Mary Grayson.

    WALLY: Nightwing's parents.

    LINDA: Yeah. Think it's a coincidence?

    WALLY: Where'd it happen?

    LINDA: Bludhaven.

    WALLY: Then no.

    LINDA: So what are you going to do about it?

    WALLY: Nightwing can't be trusted. I'm relieving him of command. By whatever means necessary.


    The equivalent of any Park Avenue apartment. MR. WINTERGREEN, a stocky English butler who you might be interested in knowing was once a top SAS operative, walks down the room with a tray of refreshments.

    WINTERGREEN: I must say, sir, your new den becomes you.

    SLADE: (O.S.) Thank you, Wintergreen. I thought it was quite an improvement myself. Makes me feel more at home, if you get my drift.

    Wintergreen approaches a high-backed chair by the fireplace.

    WINTERGREEN: Sir, I went over your stocks this morning. Most are up, although that record label you bought shows signs of weakening.

    SLADE: (O.S.) Then sell it. I don't play with losers.

    The man rises from his chair. SLADE WILSON is in his fifties, strong as an ox, very handsome, very polished. Debonair, even. A white eyepatch covers his right eye. An aristocratic goatee beard covers his chin.

    SLADE: (O.S.) Speaking of which, I think it's time to move Plan J forward. Get my agent on the phone, will you? We have to work out the specifics. I tell you, Wintergreen, before this year is out, good things are going to happen.

    Wintergreen pours him some tea.

    SLADE: To success, old friend. It's so much more pleasurable than failure. But then, Deathstroke never fails.

    Next: Someone leaves the team
  8. bored One Sexy Lemur

    Sep 18, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Deathstroke, you say? Alright then. On a general note, I saw a thread where somebody posted pages where Aquaman owned Deathstroke a week or so ago.
  9. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Aquaman did not "own" Deathstroke. You see, Slade Wilson is a huge proponent of gay rights, so he threw the fight to make Aquaman, one of the first homosexual superheroes, look good. Kudos to Deathstroke for putting what's good for America before his own personal pride. Kudos.
  10. bored One Sexy Lemur

    Sep 18, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Really? Aw, that's so sweet of him.
  11. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Beast Boy flies through the tower as a BUTTERFLY.

    BEAST BOY: (singing) Come my lady
    Come, come my lady
    I'm your butterfly. Sugar, baby


    Beast Boy flies in through the airvent, transforming into a HUMMINGBIRD. Cyborg is packing a suitcase.

    BEAST BOY: Well, if isn't my one and only chromium-plated, sterling-silver, polished and buffed, tin-headed pal. Where have you been? I've been looking everywhere for you. Earth to Victor Stone! Earth to Victor Stone! This is Mars and Mars needs women!

    Cyborg slaps him away.

    CYBORG: Get out of my face, Logan!

    Beast Boy lands, transforms back, now upside down.

    BEAST BOY: Huh? What'd I do?

    He gets to his feet as Cyborg answers.

    CYBORG: It's that guy. He was right about me. I've been so busy living it up in this damn tower I've lost sight of the little guy.

    BEAST BOY: I thought I was your little guy.

    CYBORG: My mind's made up. I'm leaving.

    BEAST BOY: LEAVING? You can't leave! You're a... a charter member!

    CYBORG: I have to. This team's just too damn crazy. First there was the witch, than that alien, who knows what's next?

    Beast Boy turns into a meekrat and hops onto the refridgerator.

    BEAST BOY: Exactly! Never knowing where adventure will find us, that's the greatest gift of all. Why, tomorrow we could be sword-fighting in an extinct volcano or romancing a chick with three boobs!

    CYBORG: Be sure to write me a letter.

    Cyborg hefts his bag and exits. Beast Boy follows him.


    Beast Boy follows close on Cyborg's heels.

    BEAST BOY: C'mon, just a little while longer. Flash said...

    CYBORG: Flash said this, Flash said that. Why don't you just marry the guy?

    He presses the call button on the elevator. The doors open.

    BEAST BOY: C'mon, Cy, don't be like that. Just give it a few days. It's not like you're going to rust.

    Cyborg sighs and looks between Gar and the elevator.

    CYBORG: Sorry, man. Gotta do what I gotta do.


    Cyborg walks through the park, dressed in a long overcoat and hat to conceal his deformity, indulging himself in flagrant self-pity. A BASEBALL hits him on the head.

    CYBORG: What the hell?

    He picks it up, tosses it up and down. A KID runs up to him, wearing a catcher's mitt on one hand.

    KID: Hey, that's my ball, stop playing with it.

    CYBORG: This isn't a ball, it's a lethal weapon. Have you got a licence for it?

    KID: Oh don't be so grotie.

    CYBORG: A boy your age throwing things at people. How old are you anyway?

    KID: (aggressively) Nine.

    CYBORG: Ha. Bet you're only eight and a half.

    KID: (countering swiftly) Eight and two thirds. Now give it over, you're only jealous cuz you're old.

    CYBORG: (amused) That so?

    KID: I bet you're (searching for an age) sixteen!

    CYBORG: Eighteen and two thirds, actually.

    KID: Awww, keep it. I'm not using it anyways.

    CYBORG: Why's that?

    KID: You gotta lotta questions, you know that?

    CYBORG: Yeah. Questions like 'why aren't you at school?'

    KID: I'm a deserter.

    CYBORG: That right?

    KID: Yeah, it's too good a day to learn about dead people and fractions and places I'll never visit.

    CYBORG: Just you?

    KID: No, Connor, Bart and Tim. They was supposed to come with me but they chickened.

    CYBORG: Yeah? And they're your gang are they?

    KID: (sighing) Yeah.

    CYBORG: Not much fun without 'em, is it? What are they like?

    The Kid is glad to have something to talk about.

    KID: (enthusiastically) Bart's hyperactive, he never ever sits still for anything, and Tim's really good with computers and stuff.

    CYBORG: How about Con?

    KID: He's a bit of a trip but it's alright 'cuz he's one of the gang.

    Cyborg nods his head understandingly and throws the ball to the kid.

    CYBORG: Hit one to right field for me, huh?

    The Kid throws it back. Cyborg catches it. They throw it back and forth.

    KID: Why aren't you at work?

    CYBORG: I'm a deserter too.

    KID: So why aren't you with your gang?

    That catches Cyborg off-guard. The ball bounces off his chest with a metallic clang. Cyborg reaches down to pick it up, revealing...

    KID: Your hand!

    Shining in the bright sunlight.

    CYBORG: Yeah, kid, my hand. My face too...

    He takes off his hat.

    KID: Wow, it's real neat. I wish they gave me one like that.

    He takes off his baseball glove to reveal a PROSTHETIC HAND.

    KID: All they gave me was this regular one.

    Cyborg is taken way aback.

    BART: (O.S.) Hey Red, c'mon!

    Cyborg looks up to see THREE KIDS, one of whom (the speaker, waving his hands) has a wild burst of hair.

    KID: See ya.

    The Kid runs off to join his friends. As he joins them they punch and scuffle together. They are obviously a gang. Cyborg is left alone. Raven steps into the scene. She wears a dark sari.

    RAVEN: You four! Back with the group.

    CYBORG: You stopped a bunch of kids from playing hookie? Damn, you are evil.

    RAVEN: Runs in the family. Roy's part of a special school that teaches children with prosthetics how to relearn everyday things. I volunteer.

    CYBORG: And why is that?

    RAVEN: I was raised to alleviate pain. I can do it in more ways than healing.

    CYBORG: So why can't you heal them?

    RAVEN: There are matters beyond my purview. Matters of the flesh... and of the heart. I can't stop you from leaving the team. I can only tell you that we need you. I need you.

    He looks deep into her eyes. She stares right into his soul.


    Cyborg enters to see his MOTHER pulling some cookies out of the stove.

    MOTHER: Hello Victor. Would you like some cookies?

    CYBORG: It's Cyborg now.

    MOTHER: Well, ask your friend if he'd like some.

    CYBORG: Friend?


    Wally examines a pigeon coop quizzically as Cyborg walks up to the rooftop.

    CYBORG: What are you doing here?

    WALLY: Aren't you going to offer me some cookies? They smell great.

    CYBORG: What. Are you. Doing here?

    WALLY: Came to make you a bit of a pitch. You see, I need your help in the... Titans (such a stupid name).

    CYBORG: And why should I help you? Bunch of white people fighting other white people. Not my concern.

    WALLY: That cynicism doesn't make you look as mature as you think. But, since you asked...

    He takes out his wallet. Flips through several bills of various denominations, pulls out five twenties. Throws them out into the street. They flutter down like confetti.

    WALLY: Urban renewel. You say you want your neighborhood to be free of the pimps and drug pushers. Well, I'm betting me and my pocketbook can go a hell of a lot further than you and your molybdenum steel fists. (beat) Speaking of which, do you polish those? Because they're very shiny.

    CYBORG: I don't want your charity.

    WALLY: This isn't charity, this is a bargain. I lay down some green, we get those broken windows fixed, clean some of that grafitti up, get some decent schools set up. Bring in Starbucks and McDonald's so that those kids can have somewhere they can work instead of wandering the streets, looking for a fix. You can't beat the system. Why try? They'll just replace it with another one. (passionately) But you can change the system, improve it, make it better. (beat) Put the pride on ice, Cy. You know I'm right.

    CYBORG: Alright, what do you want in exchange?

    WALLY: Give the Titans another chance. If you're still not happy, you leave and you get to keep the car. Think it over.

    Wally begins to walk away.

    CYBORG: What car?

    Wally throws a set of keys over his shoulder. Cyborg catches it. Presses a button. A LAMBORGHINI honks.

    WALLY: I know, you're probably going to do something incredibly noble, like sell it so you can save the farm and pay for mom's heart operation and buy little Joey a college education. But do me a favor and take it for a test drive first. Get a taste for the sweet life.

    Wally exits, slipping on a pair of half-a-grand sunglasses.

    WALLY: (to himself) God, I love being rich!


    Cyborg steps out of the elevator. Beast Boy immediately hugs him.

    BEAST BOY: Alright man, I knew you had it in you!

    Cyborg shoves him off.

    CYBORG: Get your green mitts off me, saladhead! Whatever crazy-ass thing you have, I don't want to catch it.

    BEAST BOY: Right. Sorry. Cyborg does not like to be touched, got it.

    Beast Boy still can't stop grinning.

    CYBORG: And shut your face, you look like an idiot.

    BEAST BOY: I thought I always looked like an idiot.

    CYBORG: Well, that ain't helping.

    Next: Robin
  12. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Grayson looks at a small TV as it runs an interview with Flash. The sound is muted. A caption at the bottom identifies him as "The Flash – Fastest Man Alive/Spokesman For The Teen Titans."

    GRAYSON: Spokesman?

    MAN: (O.S.) No alarm system? Very weak.

    Grayson turns around, pulling a gun.

    GRAYSON: I am the alarm system.

    ROBIN THE BOY WONDER raises his hands.

    ROBIN: Whoa, man, easy. Is this how you treat all your visitors?

    GRAYSON: Just the ones who break in.

    ROBIN: What's with the gun?

    GRAYSON: I'm a cop, remember? Or at least I used to be.

    ROBIN: You know what Bruce will say.

    GRAYSON: Since when do you care what Bruce says?

    ROBIN: True. Now if you don't mind, I've got a gauntlet to run.

    He jumps out the window.

    GRAYSON: Gauntlet?


    NIGHTWING, wearing a backpack, pursues Robin over the rooftops.

    NIGHHTWING: He has you running the Gauntlet? Then you're for real?

    ROBIN: What are you talking about? Why else would I be wearing this stupid getup?

    Robin comes to a stop.

    ROBIN: Now stop steppin' all over my cape.

    NIGHTWING: If you're supposed to be my replacement, we need to sort through this...

    ROBIN: Blah, blah, blah. He boot you for talkin' too much? Maybe I'll see you 'round the cave... Dick.

    He tries to run again. Nightwing grabs him by the cape.

    NIGHTWING: If you won't stand still, ya little snot, I'll hog-tie you.

    ROBIN: I'd like to see you try.


    Robin is hog-tied on the ground, Nightwing standing over him. Grayson's on the phone.

    NIGHTWING: C'mon, pick up, pick up...

    ROBIN: Let me up!

    NIGHTWING: Shut up. He may be calling all the shots, but I've got seniority over you at least.

    BARBARA: (filtered) Hello, you've reached Barbara Gordon.

    NIGHTWING: Babs, thank God...

    BARBARA: (filtered) I'm not here right now, leave a message.


    NIGHTWING: Pick up, Babs. I'm not mad, I just need to talk to you...

    ROBIN: Who's Babs?

    Nightwing whispers something more into the phone and hangs up.

    NIGHTWING: You don't know?

    Robin suddenly kicks his legs out from under him. Begins picking the lock.

    ROBIN: Thought it was just him and the English guy.

    NIGHTWING: Go home, kid. Tell him I'm happy he's moving on and...

    Robin frees himself and flings the cuffs into Nightwing's face.

    ROBIN: I get it now. This is the test, isn't it? Has-been versus new and improved model. I take down the original to get my wings.

    Robin throws a punch. Nightwing catches it, twists his wrist painfully.

    NIGHTWING: You finished?

    ROBIN: He told me about you. Found you at a circus.

    NIGHTWING: And where did he find you? Under a cabbage leaf?

    ROBIN: Where we do most of our fighting...

    He leaps up and HEADBUTTS Nightwing.

    ROBIN: (attacking) On the streets It's a new world. It's not all backflips and balance bars. You were good. Were. But Gotham needs a tougher Robin now.

    He sends Nightwing to the ground with a cheap shot.

    NIGHTWING: No finesse. No strategy. Bet the only reason he hired you was so the Joker wouldn't.

    ROBIN: Who needs finesse?

    Robin starts to walk away... a BIRDARANG is stuck through his cape, pinning it to the wall.

    NIGHTWING: From now on, we play this my way.


    Barbara checks her messages, heating up a pot of coffee.

    NIGHTWING: (on answering machine) ...I deserve to know what kind of game he's playing.

    BARBARA: Sweet-talk all you like, you are mad at me. But I did want to tell you. And it wasn't my idea.


    Nightwing and Robin ride atop the train.

    ROBIN: You do have a car, right?

    NIGHTWING: But this is more fun, isn't it?

    ROBIN: Sure, fun. They let people ride inside the train, y'know.

    NIGHTWING: This is a new world you're living in now. Outside the law. Outside of society. There's drawbacks, but there's plenty of perks too.

    ROBIN: Like?

    NIGHTWING: Like you don't have to pay for the ride. So, what brings you to Central?

    ROBIN: What brings you?

    NIGHTWING: Bludhaven stinks so much that I had to get away or I'd suffocate.

    ROBIN: Really that bad?

    NIGHTWING: Worse. When you die in Bludhaven, going to hell is considered a promotion.

    ROBIN: Sounds like my kind of town.

    NIGHTWING: So what's your story?

    ROBIN: Batman send me. Change of scenery. Adapt to new environments.

    NIGHTWING: He didn't send you down to check on me?

    ROBIN: Huh?

    NIGHTWING: Don't play dumb.

    ROBIN: Batman? I came down on my own... but as long as I'm here, how's progress?

    NIGHTWING: Slow. A few real sticklers.

    ROBIN: Flash?

    NIGHTWING: Bruce told you about that, huh?

    ROBIN: The big guy always thought he would be a problem. We shouldn't have brought him in.

    NIGHTWING: He's the best damn man I've got. The trouble is... he knows it. But if Batman's right about half of what he suspects, we're going to need that kind of experience.

    ROBIN: All I know is that Batman would never tolerate that kind of...

    NIGHTWING: I'm not Batman.

    ROBIN: I know. (beat) If you don't want the assignment, there are others...

    NIGHTWING: I'll handle it. I just... I just don't like lying to my friends.

    ROBIN: They're friends. We're family

    NIGHTWING: Hang on. The Sheldon Park turn is coming.

    The train takes a sharp turn. Robin flies off. Nightwing grabs him by the cape.

    NIGHTWING: I got you. Maybe I should rethink a cape, huh?

    ROBIN: Don't know how you got fired with that sense of humor.

    NIGHTWING: (pulling Robin up) So, how'd you get this job anyway?

    ROBIN: He caught me trying to steal the tires off his car.


    ROBIN: The same.

    NIGHTWING: Ha! That's priceless.

    ROBIN: Hey, isn't our stop coming up?

    NIGHTWING: You're right. But this is an express, so we have to make our own stop.

    He jumps off.

    ROBIN: Hey!

    Robin leaps after him.

    ROBIN: Wait up!


    They land.

    NIGHTWING: Hush, little wing. We're the stealthy ones, remember? I dictate the rules of the gauntlet now. Smell that?

    ROBIN: Ozone?

    NIGHTWING: That's criminals for you.

    Through the skylight we can see a gang using a blow-torch to cut into a vault.

    NIGHTWING: They're bright enough to know to cut through the back of the vault, but too stupid to post a guard on the roof.

    ROBIN: Let's take 'em.

    NIGHTWING: No yet. Let's wait until they've cracked the box and are giggling over the swag.

    ROBIN: Long as we're killing time, I've got a question.

    NIGHTWING: Shoot.

    ROBIN: How did Batman pick you to be Robin?

    NIGHTWING: I'm sure you already know that story.

    ROBIN: But what made him create Robin?

    NIGHTWING: I've thought about that a lot over the years. When my parents died, I think Bruce saw his own loss mirrored in mine.

    ROBIN: He wanted a partner.

    NIGHTWING: No. I think he just wanted a friend. Now.

    ROBIN: What?

    NIGHTWING: The burglars, NOW!


    A THUG hits the floor. Nightwing cuffs him with a little plastic twisty-thing as Robin rummages through his getaway car.

    ROBIN: I thought I could handle tattoo guy. Guess I misjudged his strength.

    NIGHTWING: Don't worry about it. A little more experience and you won't make that mistake again. The trick is staying alive long enough to get that experience.

    ROBIN: (finding something) Hey, free beer.

    NIGHTWING: Well, don't bogart it.

    Robin tosses Nightwing a bottle.

    ROBIN: You're getting slow. Used to have people watching your back.

    NIGHTWING: Comes with the territory. This isn't like Bludhaven... or even Gotham.

    ROBIN: I know. You have to rely on other people here. Total strangers, you have to trust them. I couldn't handle that.

    NIGHTWING: Sure you could.

    ROBIN: No I couldn't. We're not the same kind of Robin.

    NIGHTWING: What's that mean?

    Robin takes a long sip from his brew.

    ROBIN: You're a natural athlete. I have to work at that. I mean, it's like you're at home ten stories over the streets. Me? All I've got all my balls and my fists.

    NIGHTWING: You know the street.

    ROBIN: But I'm not half the detective you are. Besides, all I ever wanted to be was his partner.

    NIGHTWING: Are you saying I didn't want to be Robin as bad as you do?

    ROBIN: You wanted to be a hero. I'm happy being Robin. You left the cave and became Nightwing.


    ROBIN: So that's not me. I don't plan on taking over for him someday. I won't be out here on the rooftops ten years from now. I do my shift as Robin and settle down, raise some kids, have a normal life. That's all I ever really wanted. But not you. That's why there's always friction between you these days.


    ROBIN: You're different, but you're also way more alike than you'll ever admit. Either one of you.

    NIGHTWING: (beat) Are you going to tell Batman I'm not cutting it here?

    ROBIN: I told you, I'm not here to spy.

    NIGHTWING: He'll ask you.

    ROBIN: Then I'll tell him you're making a difference. Close to accomplishing the mission.

    NIGHTWING: And if Flash gets a little caption with "Leader of the Teen Titans" on it, you'll know I got real close. Close just isn't good enough.

    ROBIN: It is for tonight.

    NIGHTWING: And you think that's all we can ask for?

    ROBIN: It's enough for me.

    Robin finishes his beer. Chucks it.

    NIGHTWING: You're littering.

    ROBIN: Didn't you hear? We work outside the law.

    NIGHTWING: Well said.

    He takes off the backpack, throws it to Robin.

    NIGHTWING: Open it.

    ROBIN: What is it?

    NIGHTWING: Something that belongs to you?

    Robin opens it. Inside is a ROBIN COSTUME.

    NIGHTWING: I don't need it any longer. There's a phone number inside. There's going to be times when you're going to want to talk to someone. Call me at the phone number inside. I've been where you're at and I'm a good listener.

    ROBIN: Thanks. B isn't much of a talker.

    NIGHTWING: I know. That's his biggest problem. Don't let it be yours.

    Robin climbs into the getaway car.

    NIGHTWING: You're stealing their car?

    ROBIN: Steal from the stealers, Dick. Two negatives make a positive, right?

    Robin starts the car.

    NIGHTWING: Hey! I'm glad he has you. Batman needs a Robin. Just not me.

    ROBIN: Batman does need a Robin, but even more than that... he needs you. At the end of the day, he needs to know you're still on his side. It's... important.

    Nightwing looks away. Throws his beer bottle into the wall, shattering it.

    NIGHTWING: Tell Bruce my loyalties are never in question.

    ROBIN: ...watch your back, 'Wing.

    NIGHTWING: You too... Jason.

    Next: Bad Ideas
  13. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Kory and Donna stand on a platform in the middle of the pool. It gently bobs on the surface of the water. Both are armed with battle staves.

    DONNA: I've been waiting for this. You beat me in the last three workout sessions. Today's my turn. I can feel it in my bones.

    KORY: I do not give up easily. And remember, I've been trained by...

    DONNA: I know, I know, the Warlords of Okaara. Well, if your Warlords ever met my Amazons, they'd run home screaming for their matriarch.

    KORY: First one in the water will lose?

    DONNA: As we agreed.

    Donna goes for a quick jab to the sternum, which Kory deflects. The speed is inhuman.

    KORY: You have been practicing.

    DONNA: Always.

    They clash again, their staffs locking together.

    KORY: You Amazons preach compassion. True warriors do not. You fight to win, not to end in a stalemate. You fight to save your friends, not protect your enemies.

    She shoves Donna back. Donna stops well before she falls over the edge.

    DONNA: Kory, sometimes you worry me. You can't just go around killing people.

    KORY: Why?

    DONNA: Because then you're no better than they are.

    KORY: If they started the fight and I'm finishing it, of course I am better. Otherwise, I would not win. One cannot win while fighting to further the cause of evil, not in the long run.

    She swings. Donna goes into overdrive deflecting the attacks, knocks Kory to one knee with a well-placed strike.

    DONNA: I wish that were so.

    KORY: Then we will make it so. Ready to give?

    DONNA: Never. This is my fight and no one's taking it from me.

    KORY: I regret that you are mistaken.

    Donna rushes her. Kory steps out of the way and trips Donna with her stave. Donna goes into the water.

    KORY: You put up a good fight, Donna, better than ever before, but...

    DONNA: I've got to keep working at it, don't I? Only Diane beat me before you came along. I guess I can only be hurt by the ones I love.

    Kory jumps into the water with Donna.

    KORY: I am glad you feel about me the way I feel about you. Now if only I could get Dick to be as open with his emotions... get him to return my feelings of love...

    DONNA: Love? Don't you think you're rushing things a bit?

    Kory swims around Donna.

    KORY: Oh, no. On Tamaran, we always let our emotions guide us. If something feels right, we do it. Is that not all that's important?

    DONNA: It is, but there's more to it than that. Are you certain you're not just in love with being in love?

    KORY: I do not know what you mean.

    DONNA: Never mind, honey. Dick's going through some... emotional problems. If you really love him, leave him alone. Don't hover over him. Either he'll come around... or he's not the one you really should love.

    Kory comes to a stop, floating.

    KORY: Maybe you are right. Maybe he does not care about me.

    Donna squeezes her shoulder reassuringly.

    DONNA: It's not you. These days I wonder if he cares about anyone.

    KORY: I don't understand. Have I done something wrong?

    DONNA: Don't put yourself down, honey. This is Dick's problem. I've seen him go through these times before. Dick's pushing himself. He works with us, on his own, and whenever the Batman needs him. And you know how he feels about the Batman. He wants to be as good, even though he never can be. He's just not driven the way the Batman is. He hasn't got that fanatical obsession and it's a good thing, because it means there's room for someone like you in his life. But he doesn't realize that, so he's all tense trying to do too many things at once. The best thing you can do is be gentle, get him to relax. I know he's short-tempered now, but when he's not trying to live up to some impossible ideal he's one of the most wonderful people I know.

    KORY: Were you ever in love with him?

    DONNA: Romantically? No. But I love him as one of my dearest friends. Speaking of which... come here.

    Kory swims closer.

    KORY: What?

    Donna dunks Kory.


    Kory and Donna walk down the hallway, drying themselves off with towels.

    DONNA: You know, I actually like your hair better when it's wet.

    She presses the call button. The elevator opens. Wally is inside, smoking a cigarette.

    WALLY: Going down?

    Donna manhandles him out of the elevator with one hand.

    DONNA: Up, actually.

    The elevator doors close. Wally makes jazz hands at the elevator. Turns and bumps into Beast Boy.

    BEAST BOY: I'm gonna do it, Wally! I'm gonna ask Donna out on a date!

    WALLY: Uhhh... you might not wanna bother.

    BEAST BOY: Why?

    WALLY: Nothing... just a hunch.


    Donna and Kory sunbathe on the roof.

    DONNA: Okay, that one looks like a bunny.

    KORY: The long ears, correct?

    DONNA: Yeah. Oh, and that cloud looks like a deer!

    KORY: And that cloud looks much like a voc'u'tuy.

    DONNA: C'mon. You're just making stuff up.

    KORY: No I'm not!

    Donna squirts suntan lotion on her.

    DONNA: Admit it! You're cheating!

    KORY: No! I am not the cheater!

    DONNA: Whatever you say, cheater.

    KORY: Donna?

    DONNA: Yes?

    KORY: Has there ever been anyone who you felt about... the same way I feel about Dick?

    DONNA: No one.

    KORY: You cannot tell me there's never been anyone.

    DONNA: Well, there was this one guy. Terry. Real winner. He cooked, cleaned, everything. And he did the most amazing thing with his tongue...

    KORY: You're not still together?

    DONNA: No. It didn't work out.

    KORY: What happened?

    DONNA: I killed him.


    Cyborg sits at the computer, playing Solitaire with a USB cable he's plugged into the keyboard from his fingertip. Beast Boy stands nearby, leaning against the door as he plays Gameboy.

    BEAST BOY: You really should've seen her, Vic. She was this mousy-looking librarian, then she let her hair down, took off her glasses...

    CYBORG: And she was still a mousy-looking librarian, right?

    BEAST BOY: Yeah. So I did her sister. Wotta dish.

    A buzzer goes off. Cyborg unplugs himself.

    CYBORG: Well, my shift's over. S'all yours.

    BEAST BOY: Joy, another bout of monitor duty. Why do we do this, anyway? Isn't this kinda Justice League?

    CYBORG: Flash says that we should keep an eye on it regardless, and when the boss-man says jump...

    BEAST BOY: Wait, I thought Nightwing was the boss-man.

    CYBORG: Well, there's the boss-man and then there's the boss-man, if you know what I mean.

    Beast Boy nods his head, then starts shaking it.

    BEAST BOY: No, not really.

    CYBORG: Just... don't worry about it. Now, if you'll excuse me...

    The door opens. Raven's standing there. Cyborg takes her arm.

    BEAST BOY: Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

    CYBORG: Bye.

    The door closes. Beast Boy scratches his head.

    BEAST BOY: I guess it's true what they say. Once you go black, you never go back. (beat) Once you go green, that's what you bean? No, that's terrible. That's where you lean? It's where you fiend?


    Cyborg and Raven walk around the core.

    CYBORG: So, where to? A little song, a little dance... maybe take in a show? I'm actually curious where your tastes lie in the movies.

    RAVEN: Actually, I was thinking of visiting the old homestead.

    CYBORG: You're introducing me to your folks already? Because that would suck.

    RAVEN: Trust me... it's worse than you think.

    Her cape enfolds them...


    What appears to be outer space, yet there is atmosphere. Raven and Cyborg walk down a marble road suspended in nothingness. The area is lit by various SUNS, each closer than our own yet somehow giving off comfortable light. Ahead of them is an enormous WALLED CITY, shrouded in clouds. AZARATH is a land out of time. The architecure is strange, Mayan-inspired, towering.

    CYBORG: What is this place?

    RAVEN: Azarath. It is my home, my essense... and yet I have always felt more alone here than I do on Earth. The belief of Azarath is true pacifism. No hand is ever raised, in aggression or in self-defense. To do so would "perpetuate an unending cycle of violence." Such was the lesson I was taught since birth. And yet, unlike all the others here, I was also taught to subdue my emotions... to submerge my true feelings. To bury any chance for hatred... and for love.

    CYBORG: And that's why you left?

    RAVEN: I came to Earth for no reason as petty as love. If my emotions were left unguarded and unchecked, the seeds of violence buried within me would blossom into a most deadly fruit. (beat) I brought you here because I need your strength. And I have feelings for you, despite all I've been taught, despite...

    CYBORG: Despite what?

    RAVEN: Nothing. I'm just... glad you're with us. Soon, the acts of a few will determine the fate of the world. No sacrifice is too great to assure that what we hold dear is preserved. You understand that, correct?

    CYBORG: Rave, you're not making any sense.

    RAVEN: I know. Forgive me. I have much to show you and very little time.

    The enormous drawbridge set into the foot of the city walls begins to lower. A shaft of golden light escapes from the opening. As the drawbridge continues to lower, the shaft of light becomes wider and brighter. It illuminates their faces. The drawbridge completely lowers, interlocking into the bridge Raven and Cyborg are standing on. For the first time, Raven is completely in the light as she pulls back her hood and soaks it in. Their bodies are silhouetted against the warm glowing light as they walk inside..


    The city is bursting with the bright colors of various vegetable and fruit gardens, and various other exotic plant life. Luscious green grass and crystal clear lakes surround many of the homes. There is a peaceful quality about the people, who are as quiet and as solemn as Quakers. They rush toward Cyborg, embracing him. Flowers are draped over him. They notably shy away from Raven.

    ARELLA, still attractive despite her age and seriousness, approaches the teenagers. She is dressed in a white version of Raven's cloak, the family resemblance clear despite her graying hair.

    ARELLA: Raven. It's been far too long.

    RAVEN: Tell me, mother, what has the council decided?

    ARELLA: They will let you speak. But they will not listen.

    RAVEN: (smiles) I knew that before. But the people I have been with... they have a way of making the impossible happen.


    The domed roof rises like a cathedral, austure and pristine. Raven, Arella, and Cyborg stand on the floor. Around them, rows of seats rise upwards in circular tiers. Azarathians mill about. On a throne-like chair, the HIGH PRIEST sits. He is the latest in the line of Azarath spiritual leaders, smug that he alone has the full and correct view on everything.

    HIGH PRIEST: We told you, Arella. Your daugher would not listen. Despite all her training and studies here, she never truly understood us. Was never truly ONE of us.

    RAVEN: How dare you! I devoted my life to healing the sick and so heavy was my conviction that I became greatest among you all!

    HIGH PRIEST: And now the sin of pride.

    RAVEN: Is it now pride to take satisfaction in a job well done?

    HIGH PRIEST: We are all but worms before the majesty of Azar. You are a fool to try to rise above your station. Your path was set for you long ago and nothing can change that. Just as Earth's fate is sealed. Which is why we fled Earth and its violent ways more than nine centuries ago. We established Azarath as our home to live in the ways of peace. And we will not permit you to bring Earth's evil to our temple doors again. Begone, Raven... you are no longer welcome here.

    RAVEN: No! I will not go! You will hear my words! Perhaps you should have killed me when you first sensed the seeds of evil planted in me by my father, because as I grew I could not be content with your passive approach to finding peace. There can be no true peace so long as you permit evil to flourish and on Earth it flourishes! Evil in its most vile form, evil at its most deadly... the one you call Trigon. If you fail to use your powers to stop him, he will take the Earth. And you will only be promoting that which you profess to despise.

    HIGH PRIEST: How simple, the mind of a child. There is a will to all. If Trigon destroys the Earth, that too is willed. Destiny cannot be changed.

    RAVEN: You're giving excuses as always. You run instead of fighting for what you believe.

    HIGH PRIEST: We BELIEVE that to fight is to degrade oneself. Earth will fall, but do not despair. The human race will live on, here, on Azarath.

    Cyborg can't take any more of this. He yells out...

    CYBORG: You'll live while everyone else dies!? What kind of madhouse is this!

    RAVEN: They believe in peace above all else. In peace and NOTHING else.

    CYBORG: Don't they understand? Peace doesn't just happen. You have to work for it! Peace isn't just the absense of conflict, it's the presense of justice and I can't find any of that here!

    RAVEN: Victor is right!

    The High Priest rises from his throne and crosses over to them.

    PRIEST: Once more, dear Raven, you show yourself to be your father's daughter. You are still as unworthy as our teachings as the day your mother brought you here. You lack the compassion to understand our...

    Cyborg punches him out.

    CYBORG: You can pick your nose, you can pick your friends, hell, you can even pick ax... but you can't pick on MY friends. Arella, can't you do something? This Trigon guys sounds like...

    ARELLA: I, above all, know the full extent of Trigon's evil. He takes lives without concern, destroys souls at the slightest whim. I know all this and still cannot offer you my help. When I stood balanced on the brink of insanity, wishing for death above all else, the priests of Azarath saved me from the darkest corner of my own soul... they made me whole again. I will not turn my back on their teachings.

    RAVEN: But you will turn your back on your own daughter?

    ARELLA: That is enough! The outsider you brought into our midst has carried violence in his heart. As always, you rebel against the teachings of Azarath. I still love you, Raven, but you should not have come back. You were exiled for trying to warn the Earth speedster and you should not have violated your exodus. We cannot help you or the Earth. But I offer you love and prayer.

    RAVEN: You offer me air when I need steel. You give me words when I need deeds. I see now it will always be so. Farewell, mother. If I am to meet my doom, it will be with those who believe as I do... and who are willing to fight for that belief!

    Next: Insubordination
  14. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Wally is reading a newspaper on one of the couches in the lobby. The door rings. He presses the intercom.

    WALLY: Yello?

    BARBARA: (filtered) Let me in, Wally. It's me.

    Wally opens the door. Barbara rolls in, wearing a heavy coat.

    WALLY: Barbara. Get your coat?

    BARBARA: No thanks.

    WALLY: Racine took out a full-page ad in the Times. I think I'm making him angry. I don't like him when he's angry. (reading from ad) "Mr. Flash, your actions are working to increase human suffering, arouse animosity toward our country, increase the likelihood of terrorist attacks, damage the economy, and undermine our moral standing in the world... Blah blah war-mongering blah blah blah blah imperialist blah blah blah give peace a chance... hey, bingo!

    He holds up a completed bingo card.

    BARBARA: Where's Dick?

    WALLY: (disgruntled) His room. Twentieth floor.

    He goes back to his newspaper.

    WALLY: Oh, Satchel, won't you ever learn?


    Barbara takes off her coat. Underneath she's wearing probably the tightest minidress known to man. She primps herself in front of the mirror. Nearby, Donna walks out of a stall. Gives her a critical onceover.

    DONNA: Why do you wear those... things?

    BARBARA: To feel sexy. Give Dick a treat once in a while.

    DONNA: You degrade yourself for him?

    BARBARA: Trust me, there's nothing degrading about it. We both have fun.

    DONNA: You're a disgrace to your people.

    Donna walks off. Barbara shakes her head.


    Dick Grayson opens the door to see Barbara waiting for him.

    GRAYSON: What are you doing here?

    BARBARA: Stopping you from making a horrible mistake. I care for you too much to see you do this to yourself.

    GRAYSON: I'm not doing anything.

    BARBARA: The Dick Grayson I first met... the Dick Grayson I love... was warm, caring, fun. That doesn't describe you now. The others don't see it, but I do. You've shut all of us out. You don't tell us what's wrong. Just a few months ago you showed you loved me... and I still want to love you.

    GRAYSON: I can't get into this right now.

    BARBARA: Please. Please don't talk anymore. Do you love me or not?

    GRAYSON: This has nothing to do with you, it's all on me. I'm... poisonous.


    Wally sits down in the big chair, a dictionary under his arm. He types on the main computer (the one with the biggest screen). A file comes up. "Surveillance." He punches it. "Enter password." Wally opens the dictionary to the first page. With one hand, he flips through it at superspeed, with the only he types in possible passwords at the same velocity.

    WALLY: (singing) I see you, you see me
    Watch you blowin' the lines
    When you're making a scene
    Oh girl, you've got to know
    What my head overlooks
    The senses will show to my heart
    When it's watching for lies
    You can't escape my

    A password matches. Wally smiles as a cross-section of the entire building comes up.

    WALLY: Private Eyes
    They're watching you
    They see your every move

    He holds his hand over the screen. Under his index finger, a section of the screen lights up. He presses a floor. The other floors fade out and the screen zooms around to show a top-down schematic of the floor.

    WALLY: Private Eyes
    They're watching you
    Private Eyes
    They're watching you
    Watching you
    Watching you
    Watching you

    He presses a room. We see Raven looking up a book in the library. Almost immediately, she turns to the camera, as if sensing him watching her. The screen turns to static.

    WALLY: (nonplussed) You play with words
    You play with love
    You can twist it around, baby
    That ain't enough

    He presses another room, a corridor. We see a CCTV-angle of Barbara outside Grayson's room. Grayson stands in the doorway, blocking her from coming in. They're obviously arguing.

    WALLY: 'Cos girl
    I'm gonna know
    If you're letting me in
    Or letting me go
    Don't lie
    When you're hurting inside
    'Cos you can't escape my

    Barbara turns and storms off. Grayson watches her go. Wally grins, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

    WALLY: Private Eyes
    They're watching you
    They see your every move


    Wally walks the Tower, throwing a baseball around ala Jack Nicholson in The Shining. Donna opens a door the baseball is headed towards. Wally, using superspeed, catches it a split-second before it hits her nose.

    WALLY: You can thank me later, jailbait.

    He strolls off.

    DONNA: Jailbait?

    WALLY: Don't worry, I'm young enough to go all night long on an empty stomach, but still old enough to fulfill whatever naughty daddy fixation you got.

    DONNA: You're sick.

    WALLY: It's a gift.


    Barbara has changed into some exercise clothes. She does pull-ups, working off the frustration. Her arms look like thin layers of skin over braided telephone cable. Wally walks in, unable to keep the swagger from his step.

    WALLY: Need a spot?

    BARBARA: That's weight-lifting.

    WALLY: So it is.

    He walks next to a section devoted to punching bags.

    WALLY: Now, is it just me or is Dick a little...

    He holds his finger near his ear and spins it around, then spins it at super-speed, using it to stir a speed-bag.

    BARBARA: Grayson is none of your concern.

    WALLY: "Grayson," huh?

    Barbara realizes she's slipped up. Wally tries to hide his smirk as he sits down on a bench, tries to lift the weight. Quickly realizes it's impossible. Muttering about Cyborg under his breath, he removes a few disks and successfully lifts it.

    WALLY: Why do you hang around that guy, anyway? He hurts you. Constantly.

    BARBARA: I love him.

    WALLY: Pull the other one.

    Barbara sets herself back down in her wheelchair and moves over to him.

    BARBARA: Something's bothering you, isn't it?

    WALLY: Thought we were talking about you and how much you love Dick.

    BARBARA: No, there's something going on. My father was a detective. You're hiding something.

    WALLY: I'm not hiding anything.

    One of his hands flashes electric-blue. The barball falls through it, becoming infused with potential energy. Its arc amplifies and the falling end embeds itself in the ground as the other end shoots up like a trebucket. Wally sits up, holding his wrist. Before he can hide it, Barbara grabs his hand. Sees his fingers flickering with electricity before they return to normal.

    BARBARA: My God, is that...

    WALLY: Not a good thing. Heh. Everytime I close my eyes, I see the same thing. Stillness. Infinite stillness. And it scares the hell out of me.

    BARBARA: Why?

    WALLY: Because I still have things to do. Lots of things.

    BARBARA: And when will you be done?

    WALLY: When there's no one left to save.

    BARBARA: That include you?

    WALLY: I don't need no saving.

    BARBARA: Why then? Why... any of this? Why this crusade?

    FLASH: A long, long time ago I asked a good man to make my life mean something. And he sacrified his own to grant my wish. And if it takes the rest of my new life, I will live up to that. (beat) I think you know more than you're letting on. I think you... and Nightwing... and Batman... are all keeping something from me and the rest of the Titans.

    BARBARA: You have quite a vivid imagination.

    WALLY: Before you make your final decision on where your loyalties lie, keep in mind he's already traded up for next year's model. She's got huge tracts of land, she can fly... and when he goes out to catch baddies, she doesn't need wheelchair access to go along for the ride.

    BARBARA: He wouldn't. Not with her...

    WALLY: Well, he doesn't seem to with you either.

    BARBARA: Alright, this has gone on far enough. I'll admit, I was a bit... charmed that you retained an interest in me, even after you found out I was Cripple Girl, not Batgirl...

    WALLY: You were Batgirl? My, I bet you have a few stories to...

    BARBARA: Stop that! (beat) I'm not in love with you.

    Wally regroups before looking at her gravely.

    WALLY: Out of all the heroes, you picked me to be your contact, to be one of your "Outsiders". That has to mean something.

    BARBARA: It was just business...

    WALLY: No! It's more than that. If you would just stop living in the past...

    Kory enters. Barbara pulls her hands away from Wally's. The alien's liquid green eyes widen, then narrow.

    KORY: X'Hal...

    She walks out stiffly. Wally watches her go.

    BARBARA: I should...

    WALLY: Yeah.

    Wally is left alone. He lights a cigarette. Puffs it with satisfaction.

    WALLY: Couldn't have worked out better if I planned it myself. Which I did. Run tell dat, little alien. Run and tell Grayson everything I wanted you to see.

    He lets out a long exhale.


    Kory and Grayson walk down a hallway.

    KORY: I know what I saw.

    GRAYSON: Not to insult you, Kory, but you haven't been here long. What you saw could've been misinterpreted, misconstrued... it's probably completely innocent.

    KORY: We Tamaranians are ruled by our emotions. We do not deny or repress them, but recognize them. I know how he looked at her. And I know how she looked at...

    GRAYSON: Don't say that! (calmer) I trust Babs.

    He walks into the computer room. The doors close behind him.

    KORY: Who's Babs? I thought we were talking about Barbara.


    Grayson types in his password on the Surveillence screen. Goes into the archives. Presses through floors and into the gym. Types in the timecode. The video comes up. Nothing. It's been erased.

    GRAYSON: No.

    He rushes to the data retrievel keyboard. Nothing.

    GRAYSON: How? No one had the password, no one could've gotten in except... Barbara.


    A silhouetted couple in the throes of passion.


    With a bloody-murder scream of female ecstacy, they collapse. Breathless, sweaty, and happy. LINDA curled around Wally's chest, brushing her damp hair off her face. Wally strokes Linda's cheek.

    WALLY: I love you.

    LINDA: (sarcastic) You're so unoriginal.

    WALLY: Best I could come up with on a short notice. You can let go of me now. We're done having sex.

    LINDA: No, I think I prefer having you here to tend to my every sordid need.

    WALLY: Sordid, eh?

    LINDA:You know, opening jars, lifting furniture, programming the VCR...

    Linda rolls off him, groping for the telephone on the bedstand.

    LINDA: I love when you use your superspeed. Feels like you're touching me all over.

    WALLY: Not so bad for me either.

    LINDA: You wanna order room service?

    WALLY: Go for it. (beat) Linda, you ever think of having a threesome?

    LINDA: With who?

    WALLY: You tell me.

    Linda shifts a bit, getting comfortable.

    LINDA: I don't know... assuming celebrities are out, that Dick Grayson's pretty cute...

    Wally's eyes narrow.

    WALLY: I meant a woman.

    LINDA: Well, you should have specified that when you said threesome.

    WALLY: Guy-guy-girl isn't a threesome, that's sharing.

    LINDA: Says who?

    WALLY: Me. I have it on very good authority. Barry told me. First lesson of the Speed Force. Threesome only counts if it's two women and a man.

    LINDA: And you really want to have one?

    WALLY: ...it's something I'd like to do before I die.

    LINDA: Well, if that's the time table, I'm sure I'll think of someone in the next eighty years...

    Wally manages a tight smile.

    WALLY: You do that.

    He kisses her forehead.

    WALLY: One more time?

    Linda smiles, nodding.

    LINDA: You're insatiable.

    Wally reaches under the covers.

    WALLY: I'm not insatiable.

    Linda GASPS sharply.

    WALLY: I just want what's mine.

    Next: Brotherhood of Evil
  15. bored One Sexy Lemur

    Sep 18, 2003
    Likes Received:
    So.... The Flash is basically a bastard now?
  16. Nightdevil Registered

    Jan 18, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Damn Wally is a jerk in this.
  17. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Actually, there was a point in the comics where he was even more of a dick.




  18. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Central City. A government highrise in the middle of downtown. Through the windows, we can see ARMED SENTRIES in urban camoflauge standing at attention, rifles at the ready.

    Across the street, PHOBIA observes the building. She is beautiful and ice-cold, the well-refined product of a hundred generations of English aristocracy. Her face is strikingly cruel.

    VENDOR: Hey lady, want a dog?

    PHOBIA: I beg your pardon.

    VENDOR: A hot dog. For eating?

    She smiles thinly.

    PHOBIA: These are wonderful days, my rotund friend. Days filled with laughter and fear. Perhaps you have fears? Of course you do. All men have them.

    VENDOR: What are you talking about, lady? You just get out of the loony bin? You okay in the head?

    PHOBIA: More than okay... deliriously happy. My emotions run strong this day. As they do in you, I see. I sense a quickening of the heartbeat. Lust, I assume.

    VENDOR: Babe, I don't know what your problem is...

    PHOBIA: Quiet, quiet, little man... not while I'm working... the lust is overwhelmed by your fears... growing fears... gnawing fears... Ohhhh, an odd fear that one is. I have never encountered it before. Taphephobia... the fear of being buried alive. I sense that has happened to you once, man?

    VENDOR: How did you know that? What are you doing?

    PHOBIA: Allowing you to live your fear, to see how ludricious it is. But of course, you can't do that, can you? No one can overcome their own fear. Taphephobia... not a very interesting fear, I'm afraid. Ah well, you do the best you can with what is provided. Adieu.

    She crosses the street as the Vendor crumples to the ground, screaming.

    PHOBIA: I live for emotions... raw, powerful, exposed! They give me my strength, my will, my power. The feeling of man stripped of all dignity as he gives in to his basest fears is truly without peer. Emotions, burning in their purest form. Simply exquisite.


    An imperially-designed room, full of columns and spiraling staircases to work pits and higher floors. At the far end of the room is a single large elevator. Right beside the doors is a SECURITY STATION. A PLAINCLOTHES SECURITY GUARD with a metal detection wand holstered in his belt drinks a cup of coffee. The Sentries, obviously US military, stand ready.

    Phobia walks in, green cape billowing behind her.

    SECURITY GUARD: Excuse me, ma'am, but do you have a security clearance?

    PHOBIA: No, but you have a fear, I see. ATTEND TO IT!

    She gestures at the Security Guard, who suddenly scratches at his face as if trying to dislodge something. She turns her gaze to the Sentries as they bring their weapons to bear. They begin shivering in fear.

    SENTRY 1: Oh my God...

    SENTRY 2: What are you staring at? Don't look at me!

    SENTRY 3: No! Stay away!

    PHOBIA: Gentlemen... time to conquer your fears.

    As one, they turn their weapons on themselves.

    PHOBIA: And what greater fear is there... then death?

    Her face courses with an almost orgasmic release as we hear a chorus of gunshots offscreen.


    A large workspace. Busy technicians. Suddenly, the lights dim, workstations go dead. The FLOOR MANAGER looks up.

    FLOOR MANAGER: What the hell was that?

    With a BURST OF LIGHT, MONSIEUR MALLAH is teleported in. He's a six-hundred pound silverback gorilla with two bandoliers of ammo slung across his muscular chest. With a mighty roar, he launches himself into the crowd, ripping them apart. He grabs the Floor Manager, preparing to break him over his knees...

    WARP: (O.S.) Non! Him we need.

    WARP is weaselly, sadistic, and worst of all... French. He takes the Floor Manager.

    WARP: Don't consider this a mercy. Soon, you'll be envying the others.


    The BRAIN, a floating brain in a jar surrounded by a frightening robotic endoskeleton, watches as the Floor Manager and Warp teleport in. The Floor Manager is forced to his knees.

    BRAIN: What are the arming codes for the SADMs?

    FLOOR MANAGER: I don't know what you're talking about.

    BRAIN: Very well.

    The Brain pulses... and the Floor Manager screams.


    Wally walks into the commons, where Beast Boy, Cyborg, Kory, and Donna are gathered. Kory gives him an evil eye which goes unnoticed.

    WALLY: Hey superfriends, what's up?

    BEAST BOY: We're a porno!

    WALLY: And I didn't even know we were playing charades.

    CYBORG: No, someone made a porno of us.

    WALLY: Now my life is finally worthwhile.

    He jumps onto the couch.

    WALLY: Oh, I'm up! Excellent!

    PORN STAR: Oh! Oh! Oh! ...wait, that's it? No wonder they call you the Fastest Man Alive.

    Everyone laughs.

    WALLY: Hey! I resent that! Where's the phone? I'm calling my lawyer. That's defamation of characer. Homey don't play that.

    NIGHTWING: (filtered, over P.A.) Everyone, report to the situation room immediately.

    Everyone piles out. Wally gives the TV an "I'm gonna git you, sucka" point and goes along with the rest.


    Beast Boy is pulling on the boot to his costume as the Titans enter. Nightwing and Barbara are already there.

    BARBARA: Five minutes ago there was a BIG spike in traffic on the military and intelligence networks.

    Wally twists his ring. A moment later, he's suddenly wearing his Flash costume.

    FLASH: An exercise?

    BARBARA: No, the protocols are too varied. This is the real thing.

    NIGHTWING: See if any of the Watchtower backdoors are active.

    BARBARA: Are you sure?

    NIGHTWING: That's why you installed them.

    BARBARA: Alright...

    She types in a few commands. Information scrolls down the screens.

    BARBARA: Oh my god...

    CYBORG: What is it?

    BARBARA: They've hit a decommission center in downtown Central City.

    FLASH: That's my beat. What was the target?

    BARBARA: Two SADMs have been reported armed.

    KORY: SADMs?

    BARBARA: Special Atomic Demolition Munitions. (beat) Suitcase nuke.

    DONNA: Great Hera...

    FLASH: Those would be worth billions on the black market. Any terror cell would give their testicles for one of those. We can't let them get out of the city.

    NIGHTWING: Justice League'll handle it. We're route it up to them, stay in support role. Crowd control.

    FLASH: (sickened) Crowd control? Who do you think we are, sidekicks?

    BEAST BOY: Hold up guys, I'm nobody's sidekick.

    NIGHTWING: Did you happen to read who the attackers were? Society of Sin.

    FLASH: Society of Sin? They actually call themselves that?

    NIGHTWING: I guess Brotherhood of Evil was taken.

    NIGHTWING: Society's big in Europe. INTERPOL's been after them for years. They're the guys who flooded Venice, knocked down the Leaning Tower, tried to blow up the Eiffel Tower before Superman stopped them...

    DONNA: Nightwing's right. We're not ready for this.

    STARFIRE: Warriors do not back down from a fight. Not when innocent lives hang in the balance.

    FLASH: No, Nightwing's absolutely right. (to Nightwing) You're team leader, it's your call. If you don't think the team is ready to handle this... alright. I'll handle it by myself.

    He turns to leave.

    NIGHTWING: Don't you turn your back on me!

    FLASH: I'm the Flash first, Titan second. In other words, I don't work for you.

    NIGHTWING: Stand down! That's an order!

    Flash is clearly about to disregard when Nightwing continues...

    NIGHTWING: We do this, we do this together. It's all for one or it's all for nothing. (to everyone) Suit up, we're going in.

    BEAST BOY: Hey, Society of Sin, SOS... I just got it!


    MAMMOTH, a man as wide around as most men are tall, carries two SADMs, one on each shoulder. He sets them down in one of the work pits. The rest of the Society hangs back. The Brain watches as the police put up a blockade outside.

    BRAIN: Look at them. Scurrying about like ants...

    A phone rings. Phobia pulls a cell-phone out of her pocket.

    PHOBIA: (answering) Yes. Yes sir. Everything is proceeding as planned. Yes. No sir. We'll be ready for them. (hangs up) Prepare yourselves, we're going to have company.


    The Titans, now in full costume, do some last-minute checks. Cyborg finishes programming something into his wrist-mounted PDA.

    BEAST BOY: So, first time going against supervillains?

    CYBORG: Yeah, me too.

    BEAST BOY: Mmm.

    CYBORG: Whatever happens, stay close to me. I'll protect you.

    Nearby, Wonder Girl adjusts her star-spangled earrings.

    NIGHTWING: (gentle teasing, brotherly) We're about to go into battle and you're accessorizing?

    BEAST BOY: Hey, lay off...

    WONDER GIRL: (over Beast Boy) Like you didn't spend an hour packing your utility belt in the old Robin days.

    NIGHTWING: Hey, don't knock the utility belt.

    He walks towards Flash, who's a bit of a distance away at the other end of the garage. Flash is on the phone. He hangs up when he sees Nightwing.

    NIGHTWING: Who was that?

    FLASH: Linda. Told her to get out of town in case things go south.

    NIGHTWING: You're not supposed to make personal phone calls before a mission.

    FLASH: Rules are made to be broken.

    NIGHTWING: Not by me. (beat) I don't know if there's an easy way to say this, but... stay away from my girl.

    FLASH: I don't know if there's an easy way to say THIS, but... no.

    NIGHTWING: Nobody screws with me, Flash.

    FLASH: Well, maybe someday you'll meet the right girl and all that'll change.

    NIGHTWING: This is not a road you want to go down with me.

    FLASH: Anytime you want to go, World's Second Greatest Detective... no masks, no powers, no toys... anywhere, anytime... just so long as the others see you fall.

    NIGHTWING: Be careful what you wish for. It's closer than you think.

    FLASH: I'm all a-tingle.


    In the midst of all the police build-up and media scrutiny, the STAR SLIDER lands. The Titans pile out.

    COP: Who are those guys!?

    REPORTER: They're either a new superhero group... or the world's weirdest boy band!

    The Titans look at the imposing structure.

    NIGHTWING: Alright, loose formation, everybody stay close.

    FLASH: Think I know how to handle a multi-villain pile-up.

    WONDER GIRL: 'Cause you did so well last time.

    NIGHTWING: (over her) Prove it. Give me a complete, detailed briefing on the installation.

    Nobody volunteers anything.

    NIGHTWING: The building's composed of forty-two floors. If the Society is smart, which they are, they'll have taken over the first floor and locked down the elevators and stairwell.

    CYBORG: How do you know all this?

    NIGHTWING: Computer search. It's the way the job should be done.

    FLASH: Care to tell us how many bricks were used to build it, professor?

    NIGHTWING: 58,412.

    WONDER GIRL: Only you would actually know that.

    NIGHTWING: I was making a joke. What do you think I am, anyway?

    RAVEN: Batman.

    BEAST BOY: (as frog) I'm sure this will be one of our most ribbeting adventures yet!

    In slow-motion they POWER-WALK towards the building as AC/DC's "For Those About To Rock (We Salute You)" plays.

    Next: Ultraviolence
  19. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    The PRESIDENT, a younger-than-you'd-expect man by the name of Prez Rickard, takes a call from Green Arrow.

    PRESIDENT: Green Arrow, send in the Justice League! My people are being slaughtered!

    GREEN ARROW: I'm sorry, Mr. "President," but the Justice League is unavoidably detained. Perhaps, if you could make a few concessions...

    PRESIDENT: You expect me to hand over the reins of government to an unelected, power-hungry...

    GREEN ARROW: Temper, Mr. President. Just think of me as a very influencial lobbyist... and think of how many will die if you DON'T.

    The President sighs, this is a fight he can't win.

    PRESIDENT: Name your terms.

    GREEN ARROW: First, you will triple your foreign aid budget.

    PRESIDENT: Triple!? We don't have the budget for that kind of...

    GREEN ARROW: Then raise taxes. Surely, the American people will be willing to open their pocketbooks a little extra to support worthwhile causes? Then, you will reduce greenhouse gas emissions by fifty percent.

    PRESIDENT: You can't ask me to do that! Industrial plants will be shut down, millions of people will lose their jobs!

    GREEN ARROW: Millions of people will lose their LIVES unless you start being more amenable. Thirdly, you will...

    An INTERN nearly breaks the door down.

    INTERN: Mr. President, it's the Teen Titans! They're attacking the Society!


    The President grins.

    PRESIDENT: I'm sorry, "Green Arrow," but after further consideration, I must DECLINE your offer.

    He reaches for the button...

    GREEN ARROW: No one hangs up on...

    The President hangs up. Turns the channel to breaking news footage of the Titans facing the Brotherhood.

    PRESIDENT: Go get 'em, you crazy kids.


    The Titans have made entry. Beast Boy looks around.

    BEAST BOY: Did walking in here seem to take longer than it should've to anyone else?

    STARFIRE: Are those the people we're going to beat up?

    She points forward. BRAIN, MALLAH, PHOBIA, MAMMOTH, and WARP are waiting for them. Big Sergio Leone standoff. Nightwing cracks his neck.

    NIGHTWING: Time to take out the Eurotrash.

    The following happens very quickly and all at once. With a hiss of gas, Brain shoots a VIAL from his body and into Cyborg.

    BEAST BOY: Wonder twin power - minus one - activate! Form of... a gorilla!

    Beast Boy transforms into a GORILLA.

    WARP: Zut alors!

    FLASH: Frenchie's mine.

    Flash streaks forward, hands outreached for Warp... who TELEPORTS out of the way. He looks at the wall behind where Warp was.

    FLASH: Usually there's a hole when I do that.

    In the blink of an eye, Warp teleports next to Flash, punches him, and teleports back out. Flash stumbles back, passing Cyborg. Where the vial smashed open, there is a rapidly growing PROTOPLASM.

    CYBORG: Get OFF!

    He scrapes it off against a pillar. It develops into a humanoid shape, becoming PLASMUS.

    CYBORG: Oh... not good.

    Behind him, Beast Boy-as-gorilla and Mallah trade blows. Beast Boy transforms into a ferret. He drats up Mallah's leg and onto his back, turning back into a human and wrapping an arm around Mallah's neck.

    BEAST BOY: Look! This monkey has a person on his back.

    In the background, Mallah backs into a wall, smashing Beast Boy. Starfire stalks across the foreground, advancing on Phobia.

    STARFIRE: I have heard of this Earth custom. We will now have the "catfight."

    PHOBIA: I think not.

    She gestures at Starfire.


    We see KORY riding on the back of a reptilian beast, armed with a warlance. Her harsh-faced sister, KOMAND'R rides another beast and is similarly armed. The WARLORDS OF OKAARA watch from nearby. Suddenly, Komand'r stabs Kory through the stomach.

    KORY: No! The training is supposed to be as real as war, but you do not go for the kill!

    KOMAND'R: I do! You see, Tamaran? You know now who should lead you!

    Energy flows into Kory's hands.

    KORY: I am not dead! You cannot kill me, I WILL NOT ALLOW IT!

    She blasts Komand'r, setting her on fire. Komand'r falls off her mount.

    KORY: You have tried to destroy me the way you destroyed our world!

    Like a woman possessed, Kory pulls the warlance out of herself. Her hand tightens around it. She holds it high over her head... then, coldly, deliberately, she throws it into Komand'r. Blood spurts from between her clenched teeth. A VOICE booms down from the heavens.

    PHOBIA: (V.O.) Excellent. Vicious, but wonderfully honest for a change. What delightful emotions ensue when you defeat one you have long despised. Most of us recoil from acting on our thoughts, we ear ourselves up in frustration over our impotence. But you, my dear, you acted on your desires. I roundly applaud you. But I don't think everyone feels the same way I do...

    With a flash of thunder, Grayson is standing in the pool of Komand'r's blood. Blood slowly drips down on Kory, covering her.

    KORY: Why do you look at me like that? She cerrtainly deserved to die for everything she's done.

    NIGHTWING: You have a bloodlust I cannot accept.

    KORY: It is part of my world.

    NIGHTWING: And I am from a different world.

    KORY: Turning away from me will not change things! You have to accept me the way I am!

    NIGHTWING: But I do not... and I never will. On your world you are a warrior, one of the best. But here you are just a murderer. Why do you not go home, Kory? Why can you not go home?


    Kory is on her knees, sobbing.


    Phobia smiles.

    PHOBIA: An alien mind. How novel. Let's play a little...

    She continues her torture as Wonder Girl soars above her, knocked back by a blow from Mammoth. Donna twists in the air, coiling her legs beneath her, and kicks off the wall, flying back towards Mammoth. She delivers a smashing backpalm to his nose. Wonder Girl lands and sends a series of blows into his gut. He laughs it off and brings his fists down in a massive SMASH. Wonder Girl jumps out of the way as the blow lands, creating a massive cascade of cracks in the marble floor. She slips in and delivers a knee to the man's ribs. Suddenly, Nightwing swings in on a de-cel line, delivering a dropkick to the back of Mammoth's head.

    Nightwing swings BACK towards Brain, but bounces off a FORCEFIELD generated by the robot body. He lands in a heap and Brain blasts him with a psi-bolt. Nightwing lands next to Starfire. He jumps to his feet, facing Phobia.

    NIGHTWING: What are you doing to her!?

    PHOBIA: This.

    She points at Nightwing.


    Nightwing hangs from a trapeze by his knees.

    MARY GRAYSON: Dick, sweetie, take my hands...

    Nightwing looks up. JOHN AND MARY GRAYSON

    NIGHTWING: Mom? Dad?

    Nightwing's line snaps. He FALLS.

    JOHN GRAYSON: Goodbye, Dick...

    Close on Nightwing's face. With a supreme act of will, he SHUTS HIS EYES.


    And OPENS THEM to Phobia's disbelieving face.

    PHOBIA: Impossible!

    NIGHTWING: For that, I break three of your ribs.

    He punches her out with an audible SNAP. Runs to the nearly catatonic Starfire. He cradles her in his arms.

    NIGHTWING: Star, what is it? What'd she show you? Say something!

    STARFIRE: Graub kinti ras.

    NIGHTWING: ...something in English.

    A shadow falls over them. MALLAH, about to crush them. Nightwing tackles Starfire out of the way just as Mallah brings his fists down. Nightwing sets Starfire down and LEAPS with an inhuman scream. He sails through the air towards Mallah, one leg extended... which Mallah grabs and swings him around by, bashing him against a pillar. He holds Nightwing upside-down, blood trickling from a cut on the hero's forehead.

    NIGHTWING: Get your hands off me, you damn, dirty ape!

    MALLAH: I'd prefer to rend you limb from limb! Any last words?

    NIGHTWING: Just two: suit taser.

    An ELECTRICAL CHARGE runs through Nightwing's suit and into Mallah, ELECTROCUTING him. Mallah staggers back. Nightwing attacks him with a series of kung-fu moves, skillfully evading the weakened gorilla's clumsy attacks.

    NIGHTWING: Stop this! You can't win!

    MALLAH: I was born a predator! Even with my brain enlarged, I am still a creature of instinct. I cannot stop killing anymore than you humans can!

    Suddenly, he feels Raven's fingers against his scalp.

    RAVEN: A human with a soul can control his baser instincts. But you... you deserve only pity... which you will not receive from me!

    With a sudden lurch, Mallah flies straight up and slams against the ceiling.

    NIGHTWING: You... you saved me.

    RAVEN: Why would I do that?

    NIGHTWING: Help Starfire!

    RAVEN: I cannot. Her scars run to where I cannot reach.

    NIGHTWING: Damnit! (beat) Cyborg, help Flash! Manuever A-22, just like we practiced!

    CYBORG: Got it.

    His robot eye GLOWS as he looks at Flash and Warp.

    A digitized electronic scan of the room, overlaid with alphanumeric readouts which change faster than the human eye can follow. We see an overlay of everywhere Warp has teleported. A PATTERN-RECOGNITION program plays, running down where Warp is going to transport next.

    WARP notices Cyborg watching him.

    WARP: What the hell is this!?

    Cyborg raises an arm.

    CYBORG: This?

    His arm transforms into a SONIC CANNON for the first time.

    CYBORG: This is my boomstick.

    Warp TELEPORTS away. With machine speed, Cyborg jerks his arm to the side and FIRES. Warp teleports right in the path of the blast.

    WARP: Merde.

    He's BLASTED BACKWARDS, slamming against a wall. Flash gives Cyborg a brief nod.

    FLASH: Domo arigoto, Mr. Roboto.

    He turns away just as PLASMUS slams into Cyborg. Flash rushes over to the dazed Warp, grabs him by the collar.

    FLASH: Let's see you jump around now, you cheese-eating surrender monkey.

    WARP: Alright.

    He teleports next to a wall... leaving Flash ENTOMBED in it! He begins trying to work on Flash's death grip on his collar... when the fingers TIGHTEN.

    WARP: What?

    Flash VIBRATES out of the wall.

    FLASH: My turn. This is for mimes!

    He *****-SLAPS Warp.

    FLASH: This is for berets!

    He BACKHANDS Warp.

    FLASH: This is for the Statue of Liberty!

    He gently slaps Warp.

    FLASH: And this is for AMERICA!

    He punches Warp hard on the chin. Warp curses at him in French.

    FLASH: Sorry, don't speak French. But I do kiss that way.

    They teleport elsewhere again, revealing Plasmus struggling with Cyborg. His pseudopods seek out Cyborg's exposed skin, causing it to BLISTER under his touch.

    PLASMUS: (German accent) Zis fool shall feel my terrible power! The very touch of Plasmus means a burning, agonizing end. You vill be reduced to a protoplasmic blob even as I am... only you are devoid of life!

    CYBORG: Maybe some other time.

    With the arm that's not holding Plasmus at bay, he rips into his shoulder and breaks open a COOLANT TUBE. Liquid nitrogen sprays out of it and into Plasmus, FREEZING HIM SOLID. With one hammer blow, Cyborg breaks Plasmus apart. Then a LASER shoots out, slicing off an arm at the elbow. Cyborg gasps in pain, turning around to see the BRAIN rolling towards him. The Brain fires again, just as Wonder Girl jumps in front of Cyborg and deflects the attack with her gauntlets!

    Mammoth comes out of nowhere, sending Wonder Girl flying with a hard right. He fe-fi-fo-fums towards her, sweeping Cyborg out of the way with a backhand. He lifts up one big boot to crush Donna underfoot...

    When STARFIRE grabs him from behind, putting him in a full nelson, and flying him upwards through every floor in the building.

    STARFIRE: Don't!


    STARFIRE: Hurt!




    STARFIRE: Friends!


    Starfire has flown Mammoth up into the upper reaches of the atmosphere. She holds him up with one hand, draws her other back in a fist. The punch sends him cartwheeling into space.

    STARFIRE: Take THAT to the bank and smoke it!


    Phobia, coming to, sees the sunlight streaking down from the hole in the ceiling. She sneers.

    PHOBIA: Time for Plan B.

    She slides into a work pit, in front of the two SADMs. She steps towards the first, when RAVEN appears, blocking her.

    RAVEN: I cannot allow this.

    PHOBIA: Spare me.

    Her hand shoots out, wrapping around Raven's throat.

    PHOBIA: What a pathetic case. Your fears are so RIFE. The problem with you is not so much finding your weakness as choosing which one to exploit. Your father, perhaps? No? Maybe your ludricious shyness... shall I plunge you into the center of a million souls? Wait, I have it! So delicious... You are an empath, you thrive on the emotions of others...

    RAVEN: No, Phobia! For Azar's sake, don't! You do not know what you could unleash!

    PHOBIA: Wrong. I do not care.


    Raven's standing on a PLAIN OF BONES AND SKULLS stretching as far as the eye can see, rolling hills on the horizon. The low sky BOILS, a SEETHING BUBBLING REDNESS She SCREAMS as first tens, then hundreds, then thousands, then millions and more surround her. At first they are small, no larger than dolls, but they quickly grow in size, burying her beneath their numbers. They all plead with her, grab at her, pull at her, scream at her, begging her to cure them. They pick at her flesh and rip at her dress. Naked, arms wrapped around herself, desperately trying to block it all out, she sees Cyborg lurching towards her, his rotting flesh being pecked away by crows.

    CYBORG: Raven, why? Why did you let him do this to me? Why did you help your father kill us? We loved you. I loved you. Is this how you pay us back? By killing us? Is it, Raven? IS IT?

    She reaches out to him as his flesh sloughs off his robotic form.

    RAVEN: Take my hand! My life will be passed on to you. You will live!

    CYBORG: And you'll die, Raven? Is that it?

    RAVEN: Yes, yes! Take my hand!

    Cyborg pulls away from her as his steel body, the only thing left of him, rusts away.

    CYBORG: No! You're death! You're evil! You're everything that is wrong! I'd rather die before letting you cure me! You're JUST LIKE YOUR FATHER!

    And as he fully disintegrates, for the first time... Raven allows herself to hate.


    Phobia finishes programming the timer on the SADM. She walks away, leaving Raven huddled in a fetal position on the floor. On the other side of the SADM, Flash and Warp teleport in. Flash gasps as he sees the warhead counting down.

    WARP: Welcome to my nuclear family, you boorish, crude, unenlightened... AMERICAN.

    FLASH: Big words from a man who's country's biggest contribution to world culture in the last century is a horny skunk.

    He punches Warp, hard. The Frenchman's head reverbs off the concrete floor and he's out cold.

    FLASH: But what should I expect from a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against Big Macs than against the Nazis?

    He rushes to the SADM.

    FLASH: Uhhh... anybody know how to disarm a nuclear weapon?

    MALLAH grabs Flash from behind. Throws him into a wall. We hear bones break. Flash slides down the wall, landing on his ass. His legs are broken. Mallah tramples towards him.

    FLASH: Grodd?

    MALLAH: Mallah.

    FLASH: Ah. Critical distinction. Don't I get any last words?

    MALLAH: No. I've learned that if you're going to kill someone, you never hesitate.

    BEAST BOY charges into Mallah as a RHINO, his horn goring into Mallah's stomach.

    FLASH: Good advice.

    Mallah reaches for Beast Boy, who changes into a PORCUPINE. Mallah pulls his hand back, now full of quills. Beast Boy-as-an-ANACONDA slithers up Mallah and wraps around his neck, begins SQUEEZING him into unconsciousness.

    WONDER GIRL: Mind if I cut it?

    BEAST BOY: Be my guest.

    The last thing Mallah sees is a nicely-manicured fist coming right at him...

    MALLAH: My Adam's apple...

    WONDER GIRL: Applesauce.

    BRAIN: (O.S.) Stand down...

    The Titans turn to see that Brain has a PINCER CLAW around Cyborg's throat.

    BRAIN: Or I will kill him.

    BEAST BOY: Vic!

    Nightwing melts out of the shadows behind Brain.

    BRAIN: Get down on your stomachs and interlace your hands behind your head. And Mr. Nightwing... die.

    Brain fires a laser backwards. Nightwing jumps over it. Brain fires more laser bolts, which Nightwing dodges in mid-air with impressive acrobatics. He lands on Brain, planting a small DEVICE on Brain's glass headcase.

    NIGHTWING: Nobody likes a scatterbrain.

    He jumps away as an ultrasonic PULSE shatters the headcase. The Brain topples over, releasing Cyborg. Flash helps him up.

    FLASH: You okay?

    CYBORG: Yeah.

    FLASH: Good. Hate to have to make another affirmative action hire.

    CYBORG: Yeah, I can see how it'd be easier to find another dumb white boy.

    FLASH: (to Nightwing) You going to take that from him? Don't suppose you know how to disarm a nuclear warhead.

    They start towards the workpit.

    NIGHTWING: Learned it on my fifth day.

    FLASH: Oh yeah, smart guy? What's the capital of Bolivia?

    NIGHTWING: La Paz.

    FLASH: I hate you.

    Nightwing jumps down to the SADM. The timer reads 2:00.

    NIGHTWING: (into wrist mike) Oracle, you getting all this?

    BARBARA: (filtered) Loud and clear. Files say it's a standard B-12 configuration. You could do that in your sleep.

    Nightwing pulls out a MULTI-TOOL, begins unscrewing a panel on the bomb. He pulls it off

    NIGHTWING: These things are built to be easy to defuse. All you have to do is cut the red wire.

    He rustles through the nest of multi-colored wires and comes up with... TWO, count 'em, two red wires.

    NIGHTWING: Fifty/fifty shot of blowing us all to hell.

    FLASH: (reaching for wire) I'm willing to take those odds...

    NIGHTWING: I'm not!

    He looks around, sees Warp knocked out on the floor. Runs up to him and rips open his shirt. We see an elaborate harness.

    NIGHTWING: Flash, put this on.

    FLASH: What? No! We both know Frenchmen don't use deodorant!

    NIGHTWING: No time to argue! Do it!

    In a moment, Flash is wearing the harness.

    NIGHTWING: If Warp's dossier is right, that's his teleportation system. Test out all the coordinates you can and come back here when you find someplace safe to teleport the bomb.

    FLASH: In one minute?

    NIGHTWING: Then you'd better get started.

    Flash jams in a set of coordinates and teleports away.

    BEAST BOY: So... now what?

    NIGHTWING: Now we play the waiting game.

    Ten seconds pass. 00:50 left...

    BEAST BOY: I'm bored of the waiting game, let's play Hungry Hungry Hippo!


    WONDER GIRL: Shouldn't we be running or something?

    CYBORG: Doesn't matter. We'd never get out of the blast radius in time.


    NIGHTWING: Wonder if Kory's okay.


    CYBORG: He's not coming back, is he?


    NIGHTWING: That's it, I'm cutting it.

    He prepares to clip one of the red wires when Flash REAPPEARS, now wearing a coolie hat. He whips it off as he strides up to the bomb.

    FLASH: Man, you visit China, fifteen minutes later it's like you were never there.

    He grabs onto the bomb and TELEPORTS out.


    Flash blinks into existence far outside earth's atmosphere. He kicks away from the bomb and hits the teleport button.

    Nothing. It's conked out!


    Ice forms on Flash's body. His veins bulge. He presses the button again and again.


    At superspeed, Flash disassembles the harness and puts it back together. Blood fountains from his noise and mouth, forming a red icicle over his face.


    Flash presses the button one last time. And DISAPPEARS as the SADM blows.
  20. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Flash teleports in. He staggers down, clutching his leg. The harness bursts into flames. Flash rips it off and throws it aside.

    NIGHTWING: You found a safe place to transport it?

    FLASH: Sure. None of you guys have family in Tucson, right?

    Then Flash SCREAMS as he's teleported into...


    Wally lies in a bodybag as two CORONERS stand over him.

    CORONER 1: Who was he?

    CORONER 2: John Doe. Found him on the streets. Nobody important.

    WALLY: No! I'm not dead! I'm the Flash!

    CORONER 1: Start the autopsy.

    They zip up the bodybag...


    Phobia stands by the second SADM. Wonder Girl is already on the ground, tossing and turning.

    WONDER GIRL: Terry, no! NO!

    Beast Boy steps towards her until Phobia points at him. We hear into his NIGHTMARES as he falls to his knees...

    MAN: (V.O.) Little green freak! No son of mine!

    BEAST BOY: Quiet, quiet... quiet as a mouse...


    Beast Boy and Donna stand at the window into the nursery. No, not Beast Boy. GAR LOGAN. His skin has a normal Caucasian pigment. Phobia approaches them, dressed in a candy-striper outfit with white stockings, white nurse's uniform, and a little white cap.

    GAR: Nurse, which one is ours?

    PHOBIA: That one, in the corner...

    Searching through all the adorable infants to a howling GREEN ONE.

    PHOBIA: (V.O.) The FREAK.


    Cyborg steps towards Phobia.

    CYBORG: Leave him alone! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?

    PHOBIA: Like you?


    Cyborg, DISASSEMBLED, sits on the shelves behind the counter. PHOBIA is the proprietor.

    PHOBIA: (to "us") You are interested in used body parts? Then you have come to the right place. Hands, two of them, prime and ready. Interchangeable, too. Two arms, two legs. Torso. One head. Do we match your needs, ma'am?

    CYBORG: Don't listen to him, they're my parts! They belong to me!

    PHOBIA: Uppity sort, he was... before his dismemberment. Never quite learned to forgive and forget. Perhaps part of a part will do? Nose? Eye? Only one, unfortunately. Ahh, I know... larynx!

    Phobia picks up Cyborg's head.

    CYBORG: What are you doing? Put me back together!

    PHOBIA: Shut up, boy. You people always jabber away so. You're a prime specimen, despite your origins. Big. Strong. Your parts are fit for heavy labor. You were once quite a manly specimen. Pity you're no longer in mint condition. So, do we have a deal?

    REVERSE ANGLE shows us that Phobia is talking to RAVEN.

    RAVEN: I'll take him.


    Nightwing forces his way towards her. Barring his way is HIS YOUNGER SELF as Robin.

    ROBIN: He doesn't stop loving you because you fail. He just stops trusting you.

    Nightwing pushes past him.

    PHOBIA: Give it up. No one's going to save you now.

    Behind her, Raven rises. TWO RED EYES glow from the shadows cast over her forehead by her hood.


    PHOBIA: Please. We both operate from emotions. You feel them all. Love, hate, pain, and my personal favorite... fear. You see, dear Raven, we are matched as empaths, we both feel all emotions... but I control fear.

    Raven's head rocks to the side as Phobia's power hits her. Raven slowly turns back to face Phobia.

    RAVEN: No. I can control my emotions. And I will not be controlled again, not by my father and not by YOU. Perhaps it is time to taste your own medicine.

    Her four eyes flash red. Phobia jerks back. Raven stalks towards her, cloak flowing behind her.

    RAVEN: I take other pains and funnel them into myself. I absorb the emotions of others, but I can now release those pains, those emotions, those horrors. FEEL them, know inside you what is is to suffer! What it is to die!

    PHOBIA: Keep away from me!

    She throws out her powers once more, Raven deflects them without a second thought.

    RAVEN: Foolish mortal, you truly think you can keep me out? Should I wish to, I can feed you with the collective fears of all mankind! You want pain now, mortal? Reach into your memory... know the pains that twists and cut through your victims. Feel those pains now, suffer them as you never have before.

    Her hand wraps around Phobia's face. Phobia SCREAMS.

    NIGHTWING: Raven, stop it! You're killing her!

    PHOBIA: Richard Grayson, DO NOT TOUCH ME!

    Nightwing flies backwards, landing in a heap on the floor. Raven turns her attention back to Phobia, who's collapsed on the ground. Her fingernails grow out into CLAWS. She rises her hand to strike when Starfire GRABS HER.

    STARFIRE: She is beaten! Raven, you don't know what you are doing!

    RAVEN: Get away from me, Tamaranian! Away before I destroy you!

    Starfire takes Raven's head in her hands, forcing Raven to look at her.

    STARFIRE: No, I want Raven back! Raven, please, hear me! Deep in your soul, hear me, listen to me! Whatever this is, you can fight it!

    Starfire rips off Raven's hood, is horrified by what she sees.

    STARFIRE: X'Hal...

    RAVEN: I will not be... be... Azar protect me, what have I done?

    She shoves Starfire aside.

    RAVEN: I will not kill! I will not kill! I will not kill!

    She collapses. Nightwing rushes to them.

    STARFIRE: Nightwing, can you feel the heat coming off her? It is awful...

    RAVEN: No! I won't let you touch me, won't let you take me over... away from me, away! Azar, help me, AZAR!

    She grows still and silent.

    NIGHTWING: She tried to kill us, didn't she?

    STARFIRE: No. X'Hal pity her and help her... she tried to kill herself. But you're with your friends now, Raven. Everything will be alright. Everything will be alright.

    In a shock moment, Raven CONVULSES off the floor in a final spasm.


    VOICE: (V.O.) Only for now, daughter. Only for now.

    NIGHTWING: Raven, are you...?

    RAVEN: I am... well, Nightwing.

    Long beat as they take it all in. A serious "what the hell was that?" moment. Starfire turns to Nightwing.

    STARFIRE: (brightly) So, what did I miss?

    NIGHTWING: The battle's done and we kind of won. What happened to Mammoth?

    The other Titans, recovering, approach the trio.

    BEAST BOY: Umm, Starfire... you kill him?

    STARFIRE: I do not think so, Beast Boy. But if he is dead, I really could not care less. There is only one way to fight, my friends. You fight to WIN. Anything else is senseless!

    FLASH: Now you're speaking my language.

    STARFIRE: I thought I already was. Will I have to reenact physical contact?

    FLASH: Not in front of the kids, Kory. Hoo-ah!

    NIGHTWING: (pissed) Hey, Flash, just wondering... when Phobia zapped you, what did you see?

    FLASH: (fake tears) Michael Moore... on every channel... even Playboy! What about you, Gar?

    BEAST BOY: Well, now there's TWO things I'm afraid of.

    FLASH: What's the first?

    BEAST BOY: Transgenders. (off Flash's reaction) What? Like they don't give you the heebies-jeebies!

    FLASH: Gar, you turn into ANIMALS.

    BEAST BOY: But only MALE ones.

    CYBORG: Come on, let's blow this popsicle stand.

    They walk towards the entrance, Flash hanging back. He leans against a pillar, a moment of weakness...

    RAVEN: Your legs are broken.

    FLASH: No way I'm going to be carried out of here in front of the whole country, not while HE'S walking out. So either patch me up or break his legs.

    Raven leans down and touches his legs.

    RAVEN: Azarath metrion zinthos.

    As his legs heal, her eyes widen in surprise. She looks at him.

    FLASH: Yeah, I know.

    She walks off as Flash gets to his feet. Clandestinely, Flash pulls up his sleeve. HIS ENTIRE FOREARM IS MADE OF LIGHTNING. He gingerly touches it. Electricity arcs between his forearm and his finger, shocking him. He wills himself back, his forearm transforming back into flesh. We get the sense that he's running out of time. Nightwing taps him around. Flash turns. Did he see anything?

    Nightwing holds up a small wooden circle with a green Chinese character on it.

    NIGHTWING: Any idea what this is?

    Flash examines it, using his gloved hand, hoping Nightwing doesn't notice he's got one glove off.

    FLASH: It's a jiang.

    NIGHTWING: What?

    FLASH: A xiangqi piece. Where'd you find it?

    NIGHTWING: Brain had it on him. What's xiangqi?

    FLASH: It means "elephant game." Chinese chess. Those two pieces represent the opposing kings of two warring armies trying to destroy one another.

    NIGHTWING: Any idea what that means?

    FLASH: Not a clue. Maybe he just thought it looked cool.

    NIGHTWING: Maybe.


    The Titans exit the building to a throng of reporters. The flashing cameras give them a cool strobe effect.

    BEAST BOY: No pictures, no pictures... alright, take your pictures!

    He strikes a series of cheesy poses. Flash waves him aside to speak into a mass of microphones.

    FLASH: Thanks to the tireless efforts of our leader, Nightwing, the Titans have averted this crisis.

    Nightwing registers surprise. That's unexpected.

    FLASH: Now he would like to say a few words. Nightwing?

    Flash, and everyone else, turns to Nightwing. Performance anxiety times a thousand. Nightwing steps up to the plate.

    NIGHTWING: Wherever there is crime, wherever there is injustice, wherever there is tyranny... the Teen Titans will be there.

    FLASH: And wherever there are free drinks, lucrative merchandising opportunies, and, of course, smoking hotties... the Teen Titans will also be there! Let's roll!

    Kim Wilde's "Kids In America" plays as they push through the press and into the parked Star Slider. A tricked-out PIMPMOBILE (rims, groovy paintjob, rap music, "crew") is next to them. The driver BOUNCES the Pimpmobile on its hydraulics. Nightwing smirks at him, then uses the hover-jets to shoot the Star Slider straight up.

    DRIVER: (goggling) I gotta get me one of those.

    Next: Follow-up
  21. bored One Sexy Lemur

    Sep 18, 2003
    Likes Received:
    Okay, I suppose I don't actually read a lot of DC, but what about how Raven looks is so terrifying?

    Also, is Green Arrow an ass, too?
  22. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:
    It's a surprise.

    And I don't know about Green Arrow being an ass, but he does like to go around calling people fascists and punching them for no reason, often while cheating on his long-time romantic couple.

    So, basically he's a leftist Wally West.
  23. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Wally is laid up on the couch, his legs swollen and bloodied. He's on his cell-phone.

    WALLY: Hey, if someone can sue McDonald's for spilling hot coffee on their crotch, we can make this lawsuit happen. Yeah? Well, no one ever said Jimmy Carter was a premature ejaculator. Although that would explain a lot...

    Linda comes in, hands him a tall glass of milk.

    WALLY: I'll call you back, Ben.

    He hangs up, takes the glass.

    WALLY: What's this?

    LINDA: For your legs. Calcium. Figure your body needs something to reknit them out of.

    WALLY: Why didn't I think of that?

    LINDA: Well, this gives us an excuse for some quality time. And I know just what we're going to do with it.

    Wally raises an eyebrow.

    WALLY: I like where your head's at.

    Linda walks to the TV... and puts on Pretty Women.

    WALLY: Oh, call the Titans back, I just found the seventh member of the Society.

    LINDA: It's not that bad.

    She sits next to him.

    WALLY: I'm walking wounded. I should have veto privilege on any TV programming.

    LINDA: Doesn't look to me like you're walking anywhere.

    WALLY: C'mon, give me the remote.

    LINDA: (suggestively) And what will you give me in exchange?

    WALLY: I'm sure I'll think of something.

    He makes out with her for a while. She sets the remote down and he supersonic-snatches it up.

    WALLY: Frawress victory! (flipping through channels) We are the champions, my friends...

    LINDA: Give that back!

    WALLY: No, no, I have to find something we'll both agree on. How about Terminator? That's an epic love story.

    He stops on a news program.

    WALLY: Wait a minute...

    On the TV, Snow's talk show SNOWSTORM has started. RACINE is gesturing animatedly.

    WALLY: (grim) Unmute it.

    RACINE: What we've witnessed today isn't an act of terror, but a glorious uprising against the oppression of the American military-industry complex and their international financier compatriots. Only their brave act of defiance was stomped flat under the boots of the Eichmanns and Goerings and Mengeles of the fascist police state we have allowed our country to become. The noble heroes of this revolution are being unfairly punished, but mark my words, they will one day be vindicated as modern-day George Washingtons. In fact, I'll wager that we will see their faces on dollar bills in the near future.

    Wally simmers for a moment.

    LINDA: Wally, don't let him get to you.

    WALLY: I put my blood and sweat into putting scum like the Society behind bars and then THIS GUY vindicates them as the people's heroes! (to TV) Racine... you ignorant ****. Zandia is a boil that needs to be lanced, and I'm gonna lance it! So why don't you and your little European pals just run along and have a garden party! Eat your sandwiches with the crust cut off, and watercress salad for dessert! Put on your tiny little swimsuits, frolic on the lawn! Throw a beach ball like a girl, explore the different aspects of your sexuality! Just step aside and let the real men take care of...

    He pauses.

    LINDA: Business?

    WALLY: Business... it's all a business... Something about that mission doesn't make sense.

    LINDA: Well, let's start with the perps. This Society, they're thieves, right?

    WALLY: No, dossier says they're mercenaries.

    LINDA: Freelance?

    WALLY: Don't know.

    LINDA: Then maybe someone hired them to detonate the nukes.

    WALLY: No, detonating the nukes couldn't have been Plan A. If it was, they would've done it before we got there. They had another objective...

    LINDA: Someone hired them to steal the nukes?

    WALLY: Stands to reason. But who...?


    Brother Blood watches the news on a bank of televisions. He changes the channel away from Snowstorm. Stops. CNN is showing a replay of the Titans' exit.

    NIGHTWING: (filtered) Wherever there is crime, wherever there is injustice, wherever there is tyranny...

    Brother Blood pauses the Tivo. Reaches out to the screen and touches Raven's face. Smiles.

    BROTHER BLOOD: Cardinal Syn, call everyone in. Cancel the attacks. We've just been handed the keys to the kingdom.


    Raven sits on a zafu in a full-lotus, her hands folded together in a mudra over her belly, her eyelids half-lowered.

    RAVEN: Why have you done this to me, noble Azar? Surely before you perished you had to know the suffering I would endure. You had to know the changes that would befall me. Azar... I feel hate now. Azar, I feel the urge to kill, to murder! You taught me that pacifism was strength, not weakness... but you were wrong, Azar, wrong! I feel the evil growing within me and I am frightened by my new thoughts. Thoughts of death. Thoughts of decay. Thoughts of power! And I am frightened by these thoughts not because I have them, but because I relish them. Help me, Azar... give me comfort or damn me now to hell! I cannot abide what I have become!


    Raven strides towards the city walls, which remain determinedly closed. She is repelled backwards by an unseen force as the High Priest's face is projected in front of her.

    HIGH PRIEST: No! Raven, you cannot return! The evil is too strong in you. We cannot be corrupted by your pretense.

    RAVEN: For Azar's sake, you must not turn me away! The darkness within me can only be expunged in Azarath.

    HIGH PRIEST: We must not let your evil contaminate us. You have made your choice. When you left us, you forsook our ways and forfeited our protection. We cannot allow you near us now.

    RAVEN: You can't do this to me! You must know what will happen! You know the terror you will unleash unless you take me back! Please, I beg you... help me!

    HIGH PRIEST: Leave us, Raven... leave and go with Azar's prayers.

    RAVEN: Damn you and damn your prayers!

    HIGH PRIEST: Do not try to attack us, Raven... although we ourselves are peace-lovers, our city's defenses are merciless!

    RAVEN: Do not worry about that, dear leader. The punishment I dictate to you is the worst I can conceive... you will reap the consequences of your own actions. Goodbye and may hell take you all the sooner!


    Establishing shot. The sun rises.


    Beast Boy and Cyborg play videogames on the plasma TV. Cyborg's arm has been repaired.

    BEAST BOY: So, how's the arm?

    CYBORG: Good as new. Important thing is the sonic cannon works.

    BEAST BOY: Yeah, that was awesome! (beat) So, you and Raven, huh?

    CYBORG: Yeah.

    BEAST BOY: That's cool.

    CYBORG: Look, man, I'm sure as soon as you ask Donna out...

    BEAST BOY: Hey, no problems on that front. Today is the day, my man. Just as soon as we finish this...

    Cyborg reaches forward and turns the game system off.

    BEAST BOY: ...conversation.

    Cyborg glares at Beast Boy.

    BEAST BOY: So, how 'bout them Yankees?

    CYBORG: Must be enjoying themselves now that the season's over.

    BEAST BOY: Right right right right... wonder what Dick's up to...


    Grayson, Kory, and Donna walk through a small wooded area.

    DONNA: And we'll have privacy?

    GRAYSON: Of course. Holograph system is programmed to project an empty landscape to anyone outside the field. Extends all the way to the rooftop.

    KORY: Are you sure this is alright with you? Both of us at once?

    GRAYSON: Trust me. Me and Bruce ran through all these scenarios before. I know what I'm doing.

    KORY: Maybe we'd better start out tiny. Just you and me, with Donna watching.

    GRAYSON: Alright. Donna, you okay with that?

    DONNA: It's fine, I had a headache anyway.

    Donna sits on a boulder. Grayson stretches his back.

    GRAYSON: Alright Kory... come at me.

    Reluctantly, she fires a STARBOLT at him. He rolls out of the way.

    KORY: Again?

    GRAYSON: This time better, Kory. Faster. You gave me too wide an opening.

    KORY: I could hurt you.

    GRAYSON: So could the enemy. Do it!

    Kory fires again, using both hands. Grayson jumps up and spins around on a branch, perching on it.

    GRAYSON: Not quick enough, Kory. You aimed too low, didn't anticipate my movement.

    KORY: I am trying.

    Grayson jumps down off the branch, tackling her to the ground. He pins her hands at her sides.

    GRAYSON: If you were succeeding, I wouldn't be able to do this.

    They lie there like that for a moment. It would be so easy to move another couple of inches, to kiss her. Kory seems to be thinking the same thing.

    GRAYSON: Think it through. Can't throw me off, you've got no leverage. So... how do you want to play this?

    Kory suddenly HEADBUTTS him. He rears back instinctively and she fires a starbolt upwards. He leans back, barely ducking under it, and somersaults backwards.

    KORY: You want my full power? You have it!

    GRAYSON: Better! Much better!

    Grayson jumps from tree to tree, keeping one step ahead of the starbolts. Then with one hang, Kory fires behind him, while with the other she "leads" him with a shot. The second shot wings him, clipping him in mid-air. He drops to the ground as Kory prepares a final starbolt...

    DONNA: No!

    Donna yanks Kory down to earth by the hair.

    DONNA: What was that? You were going to kill him! It was as if you lost control.

    KORY: No. Not control. I fell back to my training... my original training. On Okaara.

    Grayson limps over to them.

    KORY: I was bred as a warrior. All my instincts are for killing. You kept challenging me... egging me on until the block against killing vanished.

    GRAYSON: Kory, I didn't mean...

    KORY: Dick, do you not see what's happening? You've been retraining me not to use my full power., but everything inside me is fighting that. You're trying to change me into something I am not.

    GRAYSON: We're talk about it later. Hit the showers.

    KORY: Forgive me?

    GRAYSON: You have to ask?

    She gives him a quick peck on the cheek and flies off. Grayson rubs at the spot where she kissed him, lost in thought.

    DONNA: What was that all about, Dick? You were deliberately provoking her. It's almost like you wanted to get hurt.

    GRAYSON: I just wanted to see how far she'd go.

    DONNA: Dick, I don't know what's going on with you. But if this keeps up, you'll be in no condition to lead this team. And don't think for a second that just because of our friendship, I'll hesitate to replace you if your issues endanger yourself or anyone else.

    GRAYSON: Maybe you should be leading the team.

    DONNA: Who said anything about me? I'll put Flash in charge if you don't shape up.

    Off Grayson's reaction we cut to...


    In the background, Grayson's Nightwing suit recharges on a clothesline along with some other clothing. Grayson hangs up the phone.

    GRAYSON: Just got word from the Justice League. They picked up Mammoth in central Asia. He'll be fine.

    Kory steps under the clothesline, parting the clothes in front of her.

    KORY: I'm glad to hear it.

    GRAYSON: No you're not. I've seen you in the training sessions, you've become more brutal...

    KORY: No Dick, I've always been this way, you have just never wanted to see that side of me. I'm not you, Dick. For frell's sake, I'm not even an Earthling! And it was wrong to try to act like one. Dick, my people believe in love, but we are trained to fight as warriors! It is what I grew up to believe and I do believe it!

    She turns to the window, looking out at the stars, her words striking a chord deep within Grayson.

    KORY: When I was a slave, I was tortured, hurt in so many ways. Only my training - my knowledge that when I could fight back, I would - kept me alive. Dick, it took everything I had not to break down and give in. But I survived and I escaped and I found you. You have to accept me the way I am... the way I accept you. Dick... did you hear what I said?

    GRAYSON: I heard, Koriand'r, I heard. But I'm not like you. I just don't think I can do what you want. I can't get involved with a killer, not again.

    KORY: What do you mean, "again"?

    GRAYSON: Nothing, it's not important.

    KORY: It is important or you would not have mentioned it.

    GRAYSON: Forget I mentioned it.

    KORY: Tell me the truth.

    GRAYSON: (snaps) Then you tell me what Phobia showed you! We all saw things, but you were affected the most. Why? What did she show you?

    KORY: I can't...

    GRAYSON: What did she show you, Kory?

    KORY: Don't ask me that.

    GRAYSON: Tell me what you saw!


    Long beat.

    GRAYSON: You're afraid of me?

    KORY: No. I'm afraid of the way you make me feel.

    GRAYSON: I'm scared too.

    They kiss, slowly and tremulously, and then with building passion. Even when it's over, Kory clings tightly to him, as if afraid he'll slip away.

    KORY: On Tamaran we don't... the royal family makes certain sacrifices. We're not meant to know love, we're supposed to do what's for the good of the commonwealth. I've never... and after I was sent into slavery, I never thought I'd have these kinds of feelings again. But the... the dalliances before were... diluted compared to this. This makes me afraid that I won't be able to control myself, that I won't be able to live without you. And I need to know if you feel the same way.

    Grayson shoves her back, HARD.


    Kory runs out of the room. Grayson paces anxiously, looks like he's on the verge of tears. He rips the clothesline out of the wall with his bare hands.

    GRAYSON: Damnit!


    Grayson tries Kory's door. It's locked.

    GRAYSON: Kory, unlock the door. Let me explain...

    No response. Grayson pounds on it repeatedly, finally collapsing against it.

    GRAYSON: Kory!

    Grayson looks up to see Raven staring at him. He points a finger at her.

    GRAYSON: Don't start.

    RAVEN: Don't have to.

    She points past Grayson. Behind him, Wally throws his arms wide.

    WALLY: (singing) I don't know how to love him,
    What to do, how to move him.
    I've been changed, yes, really changed.
    In these past few days when I've seen myself
    I seem like someone else.
    I don't know how to take this
    I don't see why he moves me.
    He's a man, he's just a man.
    And I've had so many men before
    In very many ways:
    He's just one more
    Should I bring him down? Should I scream and shout?
    Should I speak of love - let my feelings out?
    I never thought I'd come to this - what's it all about?

    Grayson claps sarcastically.

    GRAYSON: Andrew Lloyd Webber? You're slipping, West.

    WALLY: Yeah, well... they can't all be winners. (beat, points to Starfire's room) Of course, THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!

    Grayson walks away, checking Wally as he passes.

    WALLY: (in disbelief, to Raven) Did you see that? He totally body-checked me! What a dick!

    RAVEN: Your crusade will end in fire. You do know that, I trust?

    WALLY: So, why do you help me?

    RAVEN: Restitution.

    WALLY: For what?

    RAVEN: I haven't done it yet.

    WALLY: Then why not just... not do it? Can't you just... choose not to?

    RAVEN: You'd think so, wouldn't you? (beat) One day you and I shall fight.

    WALLY: Lookin' forward to that.

    Next: Clique clique boom
  24. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Barbara works at the console, Wally hovering over her. She doesn't seem to mind.

    WALLY: You know, you didn't have to come all the way down here. I could've just gone to the Clocktower.

    BARBARA: No. Clocktower's my... sanctuary.

    WALLY: Must get awful lonely.

    BARBARA: It does.

    WALLY: What?

    BARBARA: I said it does.

    WALLY: Can this be? Is a member of the Bat-clan actually talking about her feelings? Funny, you think they would've mentioned Hell freezing over on the news.

    BARBARA: I guess that Oprah thing beat it out. So, what can Velma do for you today, Shaggy?

    WALLY: Nothing much. I just need you to hack the Society's bank accounts and check who's made recent payments to it.

    BARBARA: It'll be difficult.

    WALLY: Good, that'll give you a break from doing the impossible for a while.

    BARBARA: That wouldn't be a reference to my relationship with Dick, would it?

    WALLY: You said it, not me.

    He cups her chin, turning her to face him.

    WALLY: Hey. I need this.

    BARBARA: I know.

    She turns back to the computer.

    BARBARA: Come back in fifteen minutes.

    Wally smirks and walks towards the door.

    WALLY: (singing) Baby, look at me
    And tell me what you see
    You ain't seen the best of me yet.
    Give me time,
    I'll make you forget the rest.
    I got more in me,
    And you can set it free
    I can catch the moon in my hand
    Don't you know who I am?

    Barbara looks somewhat amused.


    Wally walks around the atrium, singing to himself.

    WALLY: Remember my name. Fame!
    I'm gonna live forever
    I'm gonna learn how to fly--high!
    I feel it comin' together
    People will see me and cry. Fame!
    I'm gonna make it to heaven
    Light up the sky like a flame. Fame!
    I'm gonna live forever
    Baby, remember my name
    Remember, remember, remember, remember,

    Beast Boy runs up to him.

    BEAST BOY: Wally, you've got to help me!

    WALLY: Dude, I haven't even reached the big finish yet.

    BEAST BOY: Sorry.

    WALLY: Remember, remember... great, now I've lost the harmony. What do you want?

    BEAST BOY: Well, it's about Donna...

    WALLY: Uh-huh?

    BEAST BOY: Well, I want to ask her out, but... well... you know how it is.

    WALLY: Still a virgin?

    BEAST BOY: No! ...yes.

    WALLY: Right, this is going to be harder than I thought. But don't fret, little padawan, you've just been drafted into the battle of the sexes. Now, first things first. You talk to her, your first instinct is gonna be to open up, okay, to tell the truth. FIGHT IT!

    BEAST BOY: Fight it, yeah, got it.

    Wally and Beast Boy look over. Donna is at the other side of the atrium.

    WALLY: Still nervous?

    BEAST BOY: As hell.

    WALLY: Only reason to be nervous is if there's something at stake. There's nothing at stake. Maybe if you have a pig's chance in hell of scoring with her, then there'd be something at stake, but as it is...

    BEAST BOY: Wait, you don't think I can bag someone like Donna?

    WALLY: Gar, someday I'm sure you'll meet a nice girl who's favorite color is green and you'll have lots of little beast tots. Consider this a warm-up. (beat) But why Donna? You're a celebrity, there are millions of women in this city, do the math.

    BEAST BOY: But Donna's just really special. I would climb a mountain just to see her smile! She's the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about at night! I think I lo...

    WALLY: NO. Don't ever say that. Not ever, not even in your own head. Not until you have rode the ***** hard and put her to bed wet do you even begin to think about thinking about saying that. That is how they get you, alright? If I were you I'd set my sights a little lower, go for someone a little loose...

    BEAST BOY: What, you saying Donna's some kind of prude? You saying she isn't loose?

    WALLY: Loose? Loose? She is the opposite of loose. She is so unloose that if you shoved a lump of coal up her ass in two weeks you'd have a diamond. She is loose's antonym.

    BEAST BOY: ...I'd really prefer if you didn't call her a *****.

    WALLY: Sorry, didn't know it bothered you.

    BEAST BOY: Look, can you at least put in a good word for me? So when I'm ready, I'll have a leg up.

    WALLY: Anything for a pal. Be right back.

    He speeds over to Donna, says something to her, then speeds away again. Beast Boy is pleased until he sees Donna walking towards him.

    DONNA: Wally said you had something you wanted to say to me? He said it would blow my mind.

    BEAST BOY: Oh... he did now... Look, I'm not real good at talking to women... at all... hence the me talking to you right now but I'm being awkward and now I'm coming off as a total idiot and oh **** I'm screwing this up...

    DONNA: You wanna go out sometime?


    Nearby, Wally and Cyborg are watching. Wally shakes his head, scoffing.

    WALLY: Feminists.

    CYBORG: What, you got a problem with feminists?

    WALLY: Too easy. She made it too goddamn easy. Hasn't that... (can't say the word he wants to use) LADY ever heard of playing hard-to-get? If it's too easy, he won't put any value on it. Man never values what he can get easy.

    CYBORG: That why you wanna lead the team?

    WALLY: (beat) Screw you.


    Wally straddles a chair next to Barbara.

    WALLY: What've we got?

    BARBARA: Bank used 64-bit encryption. Might as well have left the door open. I culled down the list of deposits to those who had funded all the members.

    WALLY: And?

    With a keystroke, the screen fills up with names. Wally lets out a low, impressed whistle.

    BARBARA: My thoughts exactly. One name kinda stuck out, though.

    She highlights Julian Racine.

    WALLY: Aww, you've been keeping track of my feuds.

    BARBARA: I do keep up with the news, Wally. Why do you think everything revolves around you?

    WALLY: Because it does. What about these other yahoos?

    BARBARA: That's where things get interesting. There's only one thing they all have in common. All their names are on an initative to give the Brotherhood a religious tax-exempt status. Know how I did that?

    WALLY: Your feminine intuition?

    BARBARA: Yes, only I like to call it basic reasoning skills. Racine and these other cronies are a front for Zandia.

    WALLY: Finally, we've got hard proof to nail those bastards to the wall.

    BARBARA: Then it looks like this is goodbye.

    WALLY: Huh?

    BARBARA: Remember? You joined my little posse to expose the men who sponsored the attack on Keystone City. Well, now you have.

    WALLY: I didn't get into the Outsiders for selfish reasons. I agree with what you're trying to do. The Justice League's out of control. They love having the power of God at their fingertips, they get off on it.

    BARBARA: And you don't?

    WALLY: I eat humble pie now and then.

    BARBARA: You know, I actually thought for a moment... never mind.

    WALLY: You thought I joined to get close to you.

    BARBARA: And now I feel like an idiot.

    WALLY: Why? Is it embarrassing to be honest?

    BARBARA: I don't like things getting too personal. I've read your file, but I have no idea who you are.

    WALLY: Lot of that going around these days. But if it makes you feel more comfortable, I've got a secret too. A good one.

    BARBARA: Oh really?

    WALLY: I found out a few months ago that the Justice League had been monitoring me. They had cameras hidden in my home, my girlfriend's house... even my shower. Hacker like you, wouldn't be too hard to get your hands on those.

    BARBARA: I don't know what you're talking about, but I'll be happy to look into...

    WALLY: Did you like watching me? Because I know you've been keep an eye on me. So the question is, was it business or pleasure? What did you do while you were watching me?

    Using his finger, Wally traces a looping oval around Barbara's right breast, starting at the neck, working down to the midriff, and back up her left side.

    BARBARA: This is... borderline inappropriate.

    Wally traces another circle inside the first one. He draws a narrowing spiral around Barbara's breast.

    BARBARA: Okay, and you're crossing the border.

    WALLY: Do you want me to stop?

    BARBARA: Yes.

    Wally leans in close to her, replacing his hand on her wheelchair's armrest.

    WALLY: You don't mean that.

    BARBARA: What about your wife?

    WALLY: What about her? How is this hurting her? Am I going to have less love to give her because of what we're doing?

    BARBARA: You think you've got it all figured out, don't you?

    WALLY: There is one thing that eludes me... why you hate him.

    BARBARA: I don't...

    Wally shoots her a "give me a break" look.

    BARBARA: Because when he looks at me, he sees the woman I used to be. And he loves her, not me.

    Wally takes off her glasses.

    WALLY: You really are quite beautiful, you know.

    BARBARA: I think you should go.

    WALLY: Kiss me.

    BARBARA: What?

    WALLY: Just once. Then I'll go. Word of advice, all-knowing one. Make the most of it. You don't have an excuse for next...

    She kisses him. Wally scoops her up, pressing her to him. He kisses her passionately as the wheelchair does a graceful turn from the momentum of her rising. They back against a wall as he goes to work on her shirt, unbuttoning it. After a moment, she stops pushing against him and starts pulling him into her, her arms wrapping around her neck.

    BARBARA: He's going to find out about us, you know.

    WALLY: Please. Grayson couldn't catch a cold. He's an *******.

    He pulls her shirt open, revealing her bra. His fingers trace down her shoulder.

    BARBARA: He's a detective. A damn good one.

    WALLY: Then let him find out. Maybe then he'll stop taking you for granted.

    He cups her breast. Her breathing becomes harder, more labored.

    WALLY: You think he and Kory are doing the exact same thing we'll doing right now? Would that turn you on?

    BARBARA: I don't know whether to hate you or fall in love with you.

    WALLY: Let me help you make up your mind...

    He unbuckles her belt... then stops.

    WALLY: I can't do this.

    BARBARA: What?

    WALLY: You're right. It's not fair to Dick.

    BARBARA: Wally, this is no time to be growing a conscience.

    WALLY: I can't see you anymore. It hurts too much.

    He sniffles a little and then dramatically turns away from her, walking out the door without looking back.


    Safely outside, Wally allows himself a sly, sneaky smile.

    WALLY: It's a very good thing there's nobody around to see my crafty little grin, because I am utterly failing to conceal it.

    And indeed, Barbara doesn't see it... but from the shadows, KORY does.


    Barbara broods. CASSANDRA CAIN, Asian, teens, possibly a robot, walks to the fridge and gets a water bottle. Gulps it all down in one go as Barbara watches.

    BARBARA: Cass, have you ever been in love with a guy, I mean really in love? But you don't know if he cares about you since so much has changed since you first started seeing each other, you don't even know if he's the man you love anymore. And then this other guy comes along and he's funny and charming and sweet and he's there and he's everything you used to love about the first man, but he's not him. He's... him. And so you have this new guy you can't help but fall in love with and the old one who you still have feelings for and for some damn reason the world won't go back to making sense.

    CASS: No. That's never happened to me.

    She walks off.

    BARBARA: Why do I even bother?


    Flash sits across from SECRETARY OF DEFENSE ROCK.

    FLASH: Come off it, Rock. Everyone knows that all Zandia wants for Christmas is to be a nuclear power.

    ROCK: They weren't trying to steal the bombs, they were trying to set them off.

    FLASH: What?

    ROCK: The bombs' memory banks show they were primed long before you got underway. That's how they were able to arm them so quickly.

    FLASH: No, I was there. Detonating them was their back-up plan, they were going to move them out!

    ROCK: Priming the bombs would only make them more dangerous to transport, it makes no sense to do that unless they were going to be set off.

    FLASH: That makes no sense, the Society's mercenaries, not suicide bombers. Even if they were, why use two bombs? That's just overki... Son of a *****, we did exactly what they were going to do! We interrupted them before they had a chance to teleport the bombs to their targets!

    ROCK: What?

    FLASH: Rock, I need to talk to the Brain. Alone.


    Flash and James Jesse walk through the metahuman wing of the prison. Flash carries a duffel bag.

    JAMES: Only way Waller signed off on this was letting Brain have his lawyer present, so play nice, alright?

    FLASH: I'll be on my best behavior.

    JAMES: Are you sick or something? Your face looks a little puffy.

    Indeed it does.

    FLASH: Probably something I ate. Forget about it.

    CAPTAIN COLD: (O.S.) Well, well. Look who's back.

    Flash turns. CAPTAIN COLD is locked up in a glass cell.

    CAPTAIN COLD: Always remember, Flash m'boy... all that separates us from you is a pane of glass... and someday even that'll be gone.

    FLASH: Too bad you won't live to see it, cap'n. Don't drop the soap.


    The BRAIN is stripped of his devices, sitting alone in a pan. Flash and James walk in, running into MARVIN WOLFE, sleazy lawyer extraordinaire.

    JAMES: This is Marvin Wolfe, lawyer for Amnesty International.

    WOLFE: I'm here to ensure none of my client's rights are violated.

    Without hesitation, Flash punches him full-on in the face. The lawyer slams against the wall and slumps to the floor in a heap.

    FLASH: Nice to meet you.

    JAMES: Was that really necessary?

    FLASH: Necessary? No. It was fun. Now don't you have a job to do?

    Sourly, James exits. Flash throws the duffel bag onto the table where Brain is lying.

    FLASH: Mind if I pick your brain?

    From the duffel bag, Flash takes out a laptop, an acupuncture needle, a car battery. On the laptop, he brings up a JPEG of the human brain. He drives the needle like a stake into a carefully chosen section of the Brain.

    FLASH: This is a six-inch stainless steel needle. I have just inserted one end into the pain center of your brain. Now, you and I both know that the brain works through tiny electrical impulses running through all the little nooks and crannies.

    He holds up the car battery's jumper cables.

    FLASH: See where I'm going with this?

    BRAIN: You won't torture me. You're a hero. There are rules for heroes.

    FLASH: Yeah. That's what the League keeps telling me.

    He applies the cables to the needle. The Brain's vocalizer SHRIEKS STATIC in an attempt to capture what the Brain is trying to express in response.


    MALLAH is chained to the wall. James walks in, carrying a laptop. He sets it down on the floor and opens it. It shows a LIVE FEED of Flash interrogating the Brain.

    MALLAH: My beloved! Leave him alone! What do you want to know, you vicious brute!?


    Flash removes the jumper cables.

    BRAIN: I'll never talk.

    FLASH: You don't have to.

    James walks in.

    FLASH: And how about a round of applause for my lovely assistant?

    JAMES: We got it, Flash. Everything.

    BRAIN: You played me!

    FLASH: Get over it.


    Flash and James walk out of the prison.

    JAMES: Your hunch paid off. Mallah did care about Brain. As more than a friend, in fact.

    FLASH: ...I am suddenly a firm believer in the sanctity of marriage. What were the targets?

    JAMES: You're never going to believe this. Jerusalem and Vatican City.

    FLASH: That makes no sense. They're not strategic targets, they're not even American. What possible point could be in... aside from the obvious. My God, I've been looking at this all wrong...

    JAMES: What?

    FLASH: Zandia was never the problem. Brother Blood is the one calling the shots. And with the dearly departed General Zahl as a scapegoat, there are no obstacles to him becoming an official religion here in the good ol' US of A. Jerusalem and the Holy See wiped out in one day. Every major Western religion thrown into turmoil, just like that. And in the ensuing power vacuum, Brother Blood steps up to the plate.

    JAMES: That's thin.

    FLASH: Practically anorexic.

    JAMES: But if you're right.

    FLASH: If I'm right...

    JAMES: I have to report this to my superiors.

    FLASH: You do that.

    Next: Saving the world
  25. Zev Registered

    Oct 21, 2003
    Likes Received:

    Close on a cigarette being stubbed out in an ashtray. The FLASH. James Jesse gestures to a speaker phone.

    JAMES: You're on with the President, the Secretary of Defense, and the Joint Chiefs.

    FLASH: Think I should start with a joke? Ease the tension?


    Lex's office has a spectacular view of the Metropolis skyline (it should, it's the tallest part of it). LEX LUTHOR, bald, suave, commanding, sits behind his glass desk. On his computer, we see a sound file. He's LISTENING IN.

    FLASH: (filtered) Last year, approximately thirty-eight bombing attacks were made against the United States, both domestically and aboard. And although in all cases they were carried out by local terror groups, I have come to believe that these domestic terrorists were supplied, financed, and otherwise enabled by Zandian resources


    On a screen, General Rock speaks.

    ROCK: And do you have any proof?

    FLASH: My suspisions have been verified by agents working under the NSA, CIA, CBI, and Checkmate. Zandia's dirty as it gets.

    On another monitor, we see the President on Air Force One. He wears the Teen Titan circle-T symbol on his lapel.

    PRESIDENT: But they've only acted through intermediaries, correct? No different from the Soviets supplying Cuba back in the bad old days... or hell, us helping the South Vietnamese.

    FLASH: It goes a bit deeper than that, Mr. President.

    PRESIDENT: We're all friends here, Flash... call me Prez.

    A few chuckles.

    FLASH: I'm sure by now you've been briefed on the attempt to steal two nuclear devices from a decommissioning center in Central City.

    PRESIDENT: (re: Teen Titans lapel pin) I don't wear this for nothing.

    FLASH: Four of those involved have confessed to receiving intel directly from the Zandian government.

    ROCK: And how were these confessions gathered?

    FLASH: The usual interrogation. Sensory deprivation, drugged food, sleep interruptions... nothing that would rattle your average inmate.

    Damn, he's smooth.

    PRESIDENT: Just to be clear... are you implying that Zandia represents a clear and present danger to the United States of America?

    FLASH: Yes sir. Absolutely.

    PRESIDENT: ...I'll need time to make a decision on this.

    The monitors turn off, leaving the Flash in darkness. He puffs on his cigarette contemplatively.

    JAMES: You just lied to the President of the United States!

    FLASH: I won't tell if you won't.

    He gets up.

    FLASH: Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some urgent business to attend to.

    JAMES: Saving the world again?

    FLASH: Something like that.


    Wally hands a condom to Beast Boy.

    WALLY: For when the time comes. I assume you know how to use that and I'm not going to have to bust out the banana?

    BEAST BOY: No man, I saw the banana.

    WALLY: Good, alright. Beast Boy, open your shirt. Cyborg, you wanna help me with this?

    Cyborg walks over as Beast Boy looks anxious.

    BEAST BOY: Ummm... what are you doing?

    WALLY: Just a little insurance.

    Cyborg begins attaching electrodes to Beast Boy's chest, like a wire.

    WALLY: I'm just going to give you a teensy electric shock every time you say something that might offend Donna.

    BEAST BOY: You really think that's necessary?

    WALLY: Always is when you're around a woman who puts the "Yowza!" in your "Trowzaz!" Alright, let's test it.

    He presses a small button, not unlike a garage door opener. Beast Boy JOLTS.

    WALLY: And once more to be sure.

    He BZZTS Beast Boy again.

    WALLY: And one last time...

    Cyborg grabs the buzzer from Wally.

    CYBORG: I think I'll hold onto this.

    WALLY: Spoilsport.


    Grayson sits at the table, silently and methodically slicing up an apple with a knife. Wally walks by, gets a long-neck from the fridge. Grayson's eyes follow him emotionlessly.

    WALLY: Want one?

    GRAYSON: No, thanks.

    We know that Grayson would like nothing more than to take that knife and stick it in Wally's chest. And we know Wally wouldn't be adverse to smashing that bottle open and jabbing it into Grayson's face. But neither of them will do it.

    Will they?

    GRAYSON: So, hear you're helping out Beast Boy now.

    WALLY: I do what I can.

    GRAYSON: Helping him land a girl. That's a bit above and beyond, isn't it?

    WALLY: Anything for my boys.

    GRAYSON: Cyborg, too. You three are always sneaking off together...

    WALLY: You, of all people, are going to accuse me of running a clique?

    GRAYSON: What's that supposed to mean?

    WALLY: All we ever hear is how you and Donna used to do it in the old days. And Kory, well, she's Xena: Warrior Alien. Some of us remember what it was like to be normal.

    GRAYSON: I am normal.

    WALLY: Sure you are.

    GRAYSON: So, what is it you do on your little trips?

    WALLY: Oh, nothing much. Shoot some pool, do a little training. Nothing for you to worry your pretty little head about.

    GRAYSON: So no reason I shouldn't sit in?

    WALLY: Knock yourself out.


    Wally is browsing through a large REFRIDGERATOR full of flower bouquets.

    WALLY: First date, first date, first date... ah, here we are!

    He hands Beast Boy a tastefully understated bouquet.

    WALLY: That'll have her... you know what, give me a minute and I'll think up a non-sexual euphemism for how much she'll like it.

    BEAST BOY: You don't think it's a little... small?

    WALLY: No, no, it's understated. You don't want to come off as desperate.

    BEAST BOY: I don't think I can do this. Maybe we can call her and tell her I'm sick...

    WALLY: Gar, a great man once did something for me that I'm going to do for you.

    He pulls out a PISTOL from the icebox on the fridge.

    WALLY: Thirty, twenty-nine, twenty-eight...

    BEAST BOY: Wally, what are you doing?

    WALLY: Twenty-seven, twenty-six... START COURTING!... twenty-five, twenty-four...

    He aims at Beast Boy, who runs out of the room.

    WALLY: Is there any problem that can't be solved by the threat of gunplay? I think not.


    Gar wears a purple tuxedo, Donna wears a black cocktail dress with a starscape pattern, sips a gin and tonic. The restaurant is rather high-end and Gar looks incredibly out of place. He holds a menu over his face, licks his hand and tries to slick back his wild hair.

    WAITER: Are you ready to order?

    Beast Boy looks at the menu. All in French.

    BEAST BOY: I'll have what she's having.

    DONNA: I'll have a swordfish meatloaf with onion marmalade and he'll have a rare-roasted partridge breast in raspberry coulis with a sorrel timbale... Oh, I'm sorry, is that kosher?

    BEAST BOY: ...I have no idea.


    Grayson, Wally, and Cyborg are cramped together in the back of the van. It's covered in surveillance equipment; they all wear headphones. A single microphone is keyed into the console. Grayson speaks into it.

    GRAYSON: Compliment her hair.

    WALLY: Give me that! Her eyes, Gar, compliment the eyes.

    GRAYSON: The eyes are a cliche, every woman hears that one. Long hair is one of the hallmark differences between femininity and masculinity.


    BEAST BOY: Uhhh... your hair is very... long.

    DONNA: Why, thank you... I think.

    The Waiter brings them salad as an appetizer.

    BEAST BOY: Oh! My! What a lovely salad!

    GRAYSON: (filtered) Third fork on your left.

    Beast Boy picks it up, digs in.

    CYBORG: (filtered) Small bites, and for God's sake don't chew with your mouth open.

    DONNA: So, how you feel about the team? Any good gossip I haven't caught up on?

    BEAST BOY: Not really. Everything seems to be on the surface, out in the open.

    CYBORG: (filtered) You tell her, old buddy.

    DONNA: Little worried about Raven, thought. She's so anti-social.

    BEAST BOY: I know! I can't believe she doesn't have a boyfriend.

    BZZZT! Beast Boy does a minor spasm as he's shocked.

    FLASH: (filtered) Beast Boy, that is girl-code for "I would bang her first chance I get."

    DONNA: Are you alright?

    BEAST BOY: I'm fine... just stretching. Had a kink in my back.

    DONNA: I can't believe we never did this before...


    Wally holds up the microphone.

    WALLY: Tell her... tell her that you were afraid you couldn't trust yourself around her. Tell her that she's so independent, that's what drew you to her, but you were afraid you'd try to dominate her and that's the last thing you want to do. You want to meet her on her own terms, not some arbitary social one.

    GRAYSON: Oh, you are really loving this, aren't you?

    WALLY: Yeah, I do enjoy helping out a friend.

    GRAYSON: Not that. Married man gets to prove he's still got it. You're living vicariously through Gar!

    At superspeed, Wally picks up a dictionary and looks up "vicarious." Puts it down and returns to his old position.

    FLASH: I am not living vicariously through Beast Boy! (beat) I don't HAVE to.


    Huge white porcelain plates descend on very pale pink linen table cloths. Each of the entrees is a rectangle about four inches square and look exactly alike. Beast Boy looks at the haute cuisine. It looks Lovecraftian.

    DONNA: Not very appetizing, is it?

    BEAST BOY: But when I'm with you, I feel like I don't need food. I feel as if I could dine on your radiance.

    WALLY: (filtered) Dial it down a little.


    GRAYSON: So, this is pretty much it?

    WALLY: Well, last night we deleted the records of black voters in Florida, so... that was pretty exciting.

    CYBORG: Not cool, dude.

    WALLY: What?

    CYBORG: Don't even joke about that.

    WALLY: Oh, how can you still play the race card? You're more Black & Decker than black.

    CYBORG: Why are you giving me a hard time for that?

    WALLY: Oh, you're black? I didn't notice!

    He makes a big show of side-stepping to Cyborg's left side to see the human part of his face.

    WALLY: Oh, now I see it!

    CYBORG: Kiss my shiny metal ass!

    WALLY: Of course I make fun of you for being black. Just like I make fun of Kory for being an alien, Raven for being a goth, Donna for being an Amazon, and Gar for being... whatever. Oh, and Dick for being Batman's secret lover...

    GRAYSON: I am NOT Batman's secret lover.

    WALLY: So you've finally decided to come out of the closet? Good for you! Remember: You're here, you're queer, now it's time for the world to get used to it. (back to Cyborg) Why should you be any different? Who am I? Why are we gathered here together to get through this thing called…life?


    WALLY: (filtered) Alright, now tell her...

    BARBARA: (filtered) Dr. Light is attacking!

    BEAST BOY: Dr. Light is attacking!

    DONNA: What?

    BEAST BOY: When I'm with you... it feels like Dr. Light is attacking... my heart!

    DONNA: That's so sweet... in a nonsensical sort of way.


    WALLY: What was that?

    GRAYSON: Barbara, get off the line!

    BARBARA: (filtered) You're on my line!

    WALLY: No, you're on our line!

    BARBARA: (filtered) Dinah, watch out!


    BEAST BOY: Dinah, watch out!

    DONNA: Watch out for what?

    BEAST BOY: ...breaking my heart.

    DONNA: And why'd you call me Dinah?


    GRAYSON: Barbara, we are in the middle of a sensitive mission. Switch to another frequency!

    BARBARA: (filtered) This is my frequency! What are you doing?

    STEPH: (filtered) Uh, Oracle, who are you talking to?

    ROBIN: (filtered) Oracle, I need that bio on Killer Croc before I, you know, DIE.


    BEAST BOY: Killer Croc's skin has hardened to the point where it is invulnerable to most forms of abrasion.

    DONNA: What does that even mean?

    BEAST BOY: I'm not like Killer Croc. My skin is soft and vulnerable. I'm afraid you'll hurt me!

    DONNA: You don't have anything to be afraid of.


    BARBARA: (filtered) What are you guys talking about? What's going on here? Hello?

    Wally and Grayson struggle over the microphone.

    WALLY: Listen! Tell her... that I don't know if this is love, but when I'm with you I hope this is how love feels like, because if it's not, love would be a disappointment.

    Grayson wrestles the microphone away from him.

    GRAYSON: And I know we've had our fights, but letting that get in the way of what we have would be the biggest mistake in my life. I care about you, a lot, even though I don't know how to show it sometimes.


    Beast Boy looks down, avoiding Donna's eyes.

    BEAST BOY: I feel like I'm remembering something important when I'm with you, something that I forgot... but I don't want to forget it again. You make me feel so much, but I'm not afraid of it. And I wish I could be everything you deserve and I know that I never will, but I want to try anyway. I want to give it my best shot.


    Barbara stares at the computer, crying.

    VOICE: (filtered) And that's how I've felt all along. I wish I could look into your eyes and tell you this, but I'm not that brave. Even with your strength behind me, I'm not that brave, because I'm afraid what I would find there wouldn't be your love... and that would destroy me.


    Wally, Grayson, and Cyborg look at each other, stunned. Wally picks up the fallen microphone.

    WALLY: At least... that's what it seems like to me.


    Immediately, Beast Boy takes a drink.

    DONNA: Your erudition amazes me.

    BEAST BOY: Really? You can see it through my clothes?

    DONNA: If I asked you to turn into a horse and have sex with me, would you do it?

    Beast Boy does a spit-take.

    DONNA: I'm intimdating you, aren't I?

    BEAST BOY: Little bit, yeah.

    DONNA: Hardly surprising, me looking the way I do. It'd be kinda like a film student talking to Federico Fellini.

    BEAST BOY: Or an art student talking to Vincent Van Gogh.

    DONNA: Which is exactly what I've been trying to tell everyone. There's all this bull**** on the outside and no one... no one cares anymore what's on the inside.

    BEAST BOY: So what is on the inside?

    DONNA: It's a secret.


    WALLY: By Jove, I think he's got it.

    He takes off his headphones.

    WALLY: Well, my work here is done.

    CYBORG: But you didn't do anything!

    WALLY: Didn't I, Vic? Didn't I?

    He walks off into the sunset


    Beast Boy walks Donna home.

    BEAST BOY: (would-be suave) So, should I buy a toothbrush?

    DONNA: Actually... you really should.

    She lays one on him. At first surprised, Gar then holds her there and kisses her in return.


    Beast Boy and Donna walk in.

    BEAST BOY: So... nice place you've got here.

    Donna stares at him, a little scary.

    BEAST BOY: Whaddaya wanna go?

    Donna tugs at his pants. Awkwardly, he starts to help her. She tilts him backward onto the bed. They kiss feverishly, her
    hand pulling off her shoes, then her pants. They begin to make love. About fifteen seconds later, Gar climaxes. They are both quiet for a moment, as if unsure what to do next. He is embarrassed, a little confused...
    DONNA: This was your first time, wasn't it?

    BEAST BOY: No... not if you believe in reincarnation.

    DONNA: Probably not what you imagined, huh? No scented candles, no soft jazz...

    BEAST BOY: Actually, I never thought about it much.

    Donna laughs.

    DONNA: Yeah, right.

    BEAST BOY: No, really. I just never gave it much thought.

    DONNA: Just so you know, I'm up here.

    BEAST BOY: Sorry, it's just I've never had a chance to examine them... up-close before.

    DONNA: That's a nipple, in case you were wondering.

    BEAST BOY: Can you just...

    Gar doesn't know how to say this without sounding stupid, but somwhow she understands what he's asking of her... and she embraces him. For quite some time he lies there in her arms... and she runs her fingers through his hair... and for a moment it appears as if he is about to cry.


    Wally walks out of the showers, towel around his waist. He sees Gar and Donna, dressed in the same clothes as yesterday and with just-rolled-out-of-bed hair, standing in Donna's doorway.

    WALLY: Wait a minute... did you two have sex?

    DONNA: No

    BEAST BOY: (simultaneously) Yes.

    They look at each other.

    DONNA: Yes.

    BEAST BOY: (simultaneously) No.

    WALLY: Riiiiiiight... Gar, walk with me. Don't worry, Donna, I'll bring him right back. Just need to talk with him, man-to-man.

    DONNA: Sure.

    Wally puts an arm around Beast Boy's shoulders, leading him away from Donna. As soon as they're out of eyeshot...

    WALLY: (gives a noogie) Alright, man! I knew you had it in you!

    BEAST BOY: Hey, cut it out!

    WALLY: High five! Down low!

    Beast Boy goes for it. Wally moves his hand out of the way at super-speed.

    WALLY: Too slow! You used the condom, right?

    BEAST BOY: Yeah, I used the condom.

    WALLY: Good, good... you know why I want to talk with you, right?

    BEAST BOY: Not really, no.

    WALLY: Just want to make sure you know where your loyalties lie.

    BEAST BOY: Loyalties?

    WALLY: Who's been looking out for you, Gar?

    BEAST BOY: You have.

    WALLY: Who's been teaching you everything you know?

    BEAST BOY: You have.

    WALLY: And who set you up with Donna?

    BEAST BOY: You did.

    WALLY: That's right. But Donna... well, she's squarely in Nightwing's camp.

    BEAST BOY: Hold on, you don't know anything about her...

    WALLY: I know enough. I just need to know that, when push comes to shove, you're not going to let a woman come between us. Bros before hos, right?

    BEAST BOY: ...right, yeah, sure, whatever.

    WALLY: (smiles) Alright.

    Wally takes another condom out of his wallet, hands it to Beast Boy.

    WALLY: Now get back in there and give her one for me.

    Beast Boy runs off as Cyborg bumps into Wally

    CYBORG: Hey, what's going on?

    WALLY: Donna and Gar just got done not having sex. Schrodinger's screw.

    Next: Undercover

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