Eddie Brock
Golden Domer
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Oh, this should be good.
The "Nuff' Said" Marvel Universe Application
Character you would like to play (please include the color and font you plan on using to portray the character): Daniel Rand / The Immortal Iron Fist
Brief History (provide at least two sentences): Danny Rand is the son of Wendell Rand, a millionaire industrialist who formed the Rand-Meachum Corporation. When Danny was only nine years old, Wendell took him on an expedition into the Himalayas to find the mystical city of K'un-Lun. Wendell slipped over the edge of the mountain, and his business partner, Harold Meachum, let him fall. Not long after, Danny's mother, Heather Rand, sacrificed her life to save Danny from a pack of wolves. The newly-orphaned Danny found K'un-Lun and studied martial arts under Lei Kung the Thunderer, vowing to avenge his parents. When he was old enough, Danny challenged the mystical dragon Shou-Lao the Undying and became the Iron Fist.
When the dimensional nexus opened again, as it did every decade, Danny returned to Earth. He sought vengeance on Meachum but spared the man when he discovered that Meachum had become an invalid. When Meachum was later killed by a ninja, Iron Fist had to clear his name with the help of Colleen Wing and Misty Knight, two private detectives he befriended - the latter of which became Danny's on-again, off-again girlfriend. When Misty was attacked by a brainwashed Luke Cage, Danny stopped the attack and freed Cage's mind. The two became close friends and founded Heroes for Hire, a firm that hires out the two superheroes for private work.
Group your character is aligned with (if applicable): Heroes for Hire; Avengers (reserve); New Avengers (formerly)
Explain what you plan to do with the character you've chosen and why you've chosen this character: With Byrd picking up Luke Cage, I hope to have some fun Heroes for Hire adventures with Luke and Danny. With the exception of the occasional Daredevil or Punisher, street-level crime in the Marvel universe is often underrepresented in the RPGs. Hopefully, Byrd and I can change that. I also want to explore the connection Danny has with the other Immortal Weapons.
Do you have an Instant Messenger? Which one, and what is your screen name?: MSN - [email protected]
If you know how to post pictures, please provide a picture of your character:
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Please provide a small sample post with original content in the style that you plan to write your character in (must be at least 3 paragraphs long and contain at least one line of dialogue):
The Book of the Iron Fist. It was a gift from a friend. His name was Orson Randall. He was an Iron Fist, too. I didn't even know there were other Iron Fists. I guess I just didn't think to ask. I almost feel a little silly in retrospect. Danny Rand, unknowing inheritor to the legacy of the Iron Fist. I was just a kid, in truth. I didn't know any better. I thought being Iron Fist was all about channeling your chi, meditating, practicing the martial arts. It's certainly all of that, but there's so much more.
Sixty-six Iron Fists spanning most of recorded history. From Quan Yaozu, the very first, to my friend Orson. He thought stealing this book, written on the scales of Shou-Lao the Undying, would end the cycle of the Iron Fists. Yet here I stand, so I guess he thought wrong. He also thought giving me this book would help me win the Tournament of the Heavenly Cities, but that didn't work out too well, either. But it's not all so bad. I did unite the Immortal Weapons of the Seven Heavenly Cities, who helped me discover the Eighth Capital City of Heaven. I'm sure those deeds of mine will be well recorded in this book for whoever inherits the Iron Fist legacy after me.
I wonder whether the book will talk about my time with Heroes for Hire. Luke and Colleen and Misty may not be Immortal Weapons, but they're worth ten Iron Fists as far as I'm concerned. Just don't tell them I said that because it'll go straight to their heads. Anyway, I've decided that I've had my fill of K'un-Lun and Heavenly Cities and Immortal Weapons. Earth needs champions, too. So while I study the Book of the Iron Fist in my free time, I've began channeling my energies wholeheartedly into the newest incarnation of the Heroes for Hire. And no, it's not just because I lost my company and a good chunk of my fortune. Far as I'm concerned, that's one of the best things that ever happened to me.
"I hope I'm making you proud, old man," I announce. Somewhere, I know Orson Randall is smirking. Watch who you call an 'old man,' kid, I can imagine him saying. "Thanks for the book."
I was waiting to see if anyone would apply for a certain character before I would give this one a go.
And they have.
It begins.
The "Nuff' Said" Marvel Universe Application
Character you would like to play (please include the color and font you plan on using to portray the character): Victor von Doom, aka Doctor Doom (Dark Green, Book Antiqua)
Brief History (provide at least two sentences): Cynthia and Werner von Doom lost their lives trying to protect their fellow Romani and their son Victor from the brutal subjugation of Latverias governing and armed forces. Bent on revenge, the young Victor dedicated his youth to mastering the occult and sciences, hoping to use his newfound knowledge as weapons against his oppressors.
His scientific achievements gained the attention of a visiting American professor. Victor was then invited to attend the Empire State University where he studied alongside supergenius, Reed Richards. While at the University, Victor attempted to do with science what he could not with magic and constructed a device that would allow him to travel to the netherworld and retrieve his mothers damned soul. Ignoring Richards attempts to correct his miscalculations, Doom went on with the experiment. The machine malfunctioned, exploded, and scarred Victors face.
Expelled and blaming Richards for his failure, Doom travelled the world before settling in Tibet where a suit of armor was forged for him by a mystic order of monks. Doom then returned to his homeland and seized the Latverian throne for himself.
Doom now desires nothing more than to bring the entire world to heel, get his revenge on Reed Richards, and finally end the torment of his mothers soul.
your character is aligned with (if applicable): Latveria?
Explain what you plan to do with the character you've chosen and why you've chosen this character:
Doom has always been one of, if not, my favorite comic book villains. Ive had a few passes at him in the RPGs but they were short-lived and admittedly dull. Ive recently been on a Doom/F4 kick so I decided to give him another go and hopefully do him justice.
I want to play him as more of an anti-villain than a straight-on cape swirlin, mustache twirlin bad guy. Morally ambiguous depictions of Doom were always way more interesting to me.
Do you have an Instant Messenger? Which one, and what is your screen name?:
I have an msn account but honestly Ive forgotten all my login info. If anyone wants to contact me via messenger, however, let me know and Ill either retrieve my info or just set up a new account.
If you know how to post pictures, please provide a picture of your character:
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Please provide a small sample post with original content in the style that you plan to write your character in (must be at least 3 paragraphs long and contain at least one line of dialogue):
I carefully etch the final sections of the magic circle into the stone floor. Each line must be perfectly spaced, each angle must be of the perfect width, the design of perfect symmetry. There is a certain beauty to it. A beauty that lies not only in the aesthetics of the circle but also in what the complex geometry involved in its design suggests--that like everything else in this universe, at it's very corethe very basis, the very language of magic is mathematics. It is almost a shame that such a concept will never grace the minds of inferior intellects.
It is done.
Are you certain you wish to proceed, Master?
I have never shied away from the task before, Boris. I have no intention of starting now.
Each time you attempt this, I worry you may not return, Master...
I shall return, Boris. With or without it, I shall return. This is Dooms word. Now, leave me.
As you wish, Master, the old man says with a slight bow. He slowly trudges up the long, stone staircase leading out of the darkened chamber.
And I am alone.
It is time to begin.
Sepharimus defendan mos veritus drectan
The stone walls that surround me begin to melt and drip into oblivion as the staircases twist into odd and incomprehensible shapes. A luminous, blue orb surrounds me and becomes the only source of light as the chamber is enshrouded in complete darkness. This Sphere of Sepharim will act as both my transport vessel and my temporary protection whilst crossing planes.
Infernus morudun fracari barrus nie!"
Suddenly, a burst of crackling, pinkish energy engulfs the chamber and when the brilliant flames of the mystic combustion clears, I find myself floating in the sickly yellow skies of a new world. The Sphere, still enshrouding me like one of my own force-fields, comes crashing down like a meteor into the fiery, chaotic world below.
The Sphere dissipates and already the horrid stench of sulfur and boiling blood manages to seep through my armor. I am immediately surrounded by an innumerable horde of monstrous creaturessome horned, some winged, some so wretched and hideous that no earthly words could properly describe their twisted forms. They snarl, shriek, and roar at me but I stand my ground, ready to put a quick and painful end to each and every one of their miserable livesif they can be called suchat a moments notice.
Suddenly, a massive red pillar emerges from the very center of the demon hoard. It appears to have sprouted from the very ground and continues to grow and grow until it is several stories in height. The pillar begins to morph into a more familiar shapethat of an enormous, cloaked, crimson humanoid with glowing yellow eyes and a smug, fanged grin that I wish to rip from its very face.
Returned to my domain yet again, Doom? Surely by now you realize you have no chance. Surrender now and I can unite your soul with hers. Together, forever. Here. In my realm.
Here me, Mephistono man, god, demon or cosmic being of any realm, any universe, or any dimension will ever bear witness to the surrender of Victor von Doom! Send your accursed hoards after me so that they may vanquished by my might and so you too can be brought down before Doom!
So be it.
The demon king lets out an unholy screech before transforming into a pillar of flames. The demon hoards enclose upon me.
HAVE AT ME, VERMIN!
I mean, I know they can kick ass, and most of their woes just come from lazy writing. But you've gotta admit, their theme (and their costumes) don't really give them the same aura of awe-inspiring evil of a Red Skull or a Magneto.
yep. I pre-wrote this ****!
the "nuff' said" marvel universe application
character you would like to play (please include the color and font you plan on using to portray the character): steve rogers/captain america
brief history (provide at least two sentences):
in the 40's, in the midst of the second world war, steve rogers was captain america and served with the howling commandos, and his sidekick bucky. In the closing days of the war, cap and bucky were believed dead after stopping a bomb from destroying london.
Flash forward a few decades... A block of ice was found that had perfectly preserved rogers in a cryogenic stasis. He reentered the world and became captain america... Flash forward a few more years, and now captain america is still active as a hero with the avengers, as well as helping shield and the secret avengers protect the world.
group your character is aligned with (if applicable): the avengers, shield, secret avengers.
explain what you plan to do with the character you've chosen and why you've chosen this character: i just want to play cap, do some superhero and spy **** with the avengers, the sa, and shield. I love captain america! He's one of my favorite characters period.
do you have an instant messenger? Which one, and what is your screen name?: [email protected]
if you know how to post pictures, please provide a picture of your character you wish to be used for the character roster (if you do not know how, or do not have a preference, please say so and a default picture shall be picked for you):
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please provide a small sample post with original content in the style that you plan to write your character in (must be at least 3 paragraphs long and contain at least one line of dialogue):
sofia
bulgaria
1:25 am
smog curled out the smokestacks in sofia's industrial area. Rows of factories, processing plants, and warehouses were lined on both sides of the iskar river. Steve rogers was hunkered down on a rooftop beside the river. His colorful captain america costume had been shelved, tonight he was wearing the dark jumpsuit with gadgets embedded in it. Tonight, he wasn't in bulgaria on captain america or avengers business. Tonight, it was all about the secret avengers. He watched a factory on the other side of the river with a pair of night vision goggles.
"uncle sam to sa. Sound off, people..."
"hawkeye, in position,"clint barton said from a hidden perch a block away."standing by."
"beast here,"hank mccoy said from a nearby cathedral. He was hanging upside down, his feet grappling onto a gargoyle. "i am in position and await only your word, o' star spangled leader of men."
"venom," flash thompson said from an alley way beside the factory. He was in the shadows, the symbiote providing camouflage. "in position and standing by.""i await your command," brunnhilda, the asgardian warrior known as valkyrie, said from another rooftop. She had a hand on the large sword sheathed in a hip scabbard.
"agent 13," sharon carter said from a quinjet in the sky above sofia. The aircraft was hovering a few hundred feet above the city, invisible to the naked eye. "in position, standing by."
"roger that. As soon as ant-man gives the signal, we go."
steve checked his watch and then switched comm channels, switching from the team frequency to another one, a private frequency.
"uncle sam to agent 13, you sure this intel is solid, sharon?"
"solid as can be," sharon's voice said on the other end of the line. "aim is working on something big in that warehouse. Shield's asset inside the organization confirmed it. The source hasn't failed us before."
"well, there's a first time for everything. Uncle sam out."
rogers switched back to the team channel and continued to wait. After five minutes had passed, he sighed. "alright, i'm giving him two minutes and we go in."
"ant-man to uncle sam," the comm crackled to life. "ant-man to uncle sam, i found it!"
steve looked through his binoculars at the warehouse, his brow furrowed. "found what?... Say again, found what?"
"holy crap!" ant-man screamed through the line. "it's coming out!"
boooom!
the roof of the warehouse smashed outwards, a large and metallic hand reached out of the hole in the roof and pulled its body up on top of the warehouse. A half finished sentinel robot staggered across the roof, wires spilling from its mid-section, arms, and neck.
"uncle sam to sa," rogers said on the line. "that's our cue. Sharon, lay down some covering fire with the quinjet. Keep it distracted while we move into position."
"on the way."
"venom, take the building from the ground. Find and assist ant-man. Meet us on the roof of the warehouse."
"moving now."
"beast, you're our sentinel expert, tell us what we need to know to stop it."
"if one of you happen to have an adamantium skeleton or shoot concussion beams from your eyes, now would be the time to use it."
"don't think that's going to work. See if you can figure out another way."
"dammit, man, i'm a doctor, not a-- wait, i'm thinking of the wrong doctor mccoy."
"hawkeye, valkyrie, you're with me."
"what's the plan?"
"hit it until it stops. Remember the job, folks. Run the mission, don't get seen..."
rogers pulled out a grappling gun and shot a line out into the air. The grapnel caught and he jumped into the air.
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"save the world..."
the "nuff' said" marvel universe application
character you would like to play (please include the color and font you plan on using to portray the character): moon knight (marc spector)
brief history (provide at least two sentences): marc spector is a former us marine who took a job as a mercenary when his tour was up and eventually took a job working for the mysterious raoul bushman as security for bushman's employer who was conducting an illegal archeological dig at a forgotten site in egypt. The dig is discovered by egyptian locals who warn the foreigners that they are digging in sacred ground and that they risk angering the gods. The group ignores the warning prompting the locals to threaten to inform the authorities. Bushman responds to these threats by ordering the mercenaries to kill the unarmed locals. Only spector abstains, and when he moves to stop the slaughter he is himself mortally wounded by bushman.
Unfortunately for the grave robbers the fracas alerts the local authorities who make their way onto the scene to find nothing but the bodies of the dead locals. The remaining locals, who are uneducated and superstitious having carried the dying spector through a hidden passage into a long lost shrine buried deep beneath the sands. There they offer spector up to the egyptian god of vengeance, khonsu. In doing so, they save spector's life, thus rewarding him for his efforts on their behalf, but also turn him into an unwilling instrument of khonsu's will.
Marc spector died at the feet of the statue of khonsu that night. In his place rose moon knight, fist of khonsu.
group your character is aligned with (if applicable): none
explain what you plan to do with the character you've chosen and why you've chosen this character: i intend to stabilize the character and give him his due. There will be no split personality. Just a tormented soul who is happy not to be dead but forced to seek vengeance in the name of khonsu. This will entail not only fighting crime but also a fair bit of monster hunting and killing witches and the like. Mystical stuff which fits so naturally with the character's mythos but has never been properly utilized as far as i know (heck he uses silver weapons and started out as a foe for werewolf by night). The other thing is that i've never played him.
do you have an instant messenger? Which one, and what is your screen name?: im - [email protected]
if you know how to post pictures, please provide a picture of your character:
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please provide a small sample post with original content in the style that you plan to write your character in (must be at least 3 paragraphs long and contain at least one line of dialogue):
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then
siwa is a place rich in history. Alexander the great once came here to consult the oracle of the old gods. It was here that he was proclaimed horus on earth. Here that he was declared pharaoh. But that was long ago, and the story of alexander's visit is just one in a long list of tall tales passed down from generation to generation among the people here.
The siwa of today a forgotten place by any standard, but particularly so when one considers those glorious days now centuries past. Despite having a population of 23,000, siwa still has no electricity, no running water and only one paved road.
Siwa is surrounded on all sides by hundreds of miles of unforgiving desert. This feature once contributed so much to its vibrancy, for if not for the life giving waters of the siwa oasis, traveling across egypt's eastern deserts in ancient times would have been impossible. Water in the middle of the desert. That was what made siwa important. That was why so many ancient weather worn paths came through this place. But that was before airplanes and railroads revolutionized travel and made the oasis obsolete. These days siwa is isolated, all but forgotten by the outside world and ignored by the egyptian authorities in cairo.
But there are still those for which siwa remains a vital and necessary stop. Those who cannot afford to travel by road or rail or air, not because of monetary difficulties but because they cannot allow themselves to be seen or recognized. Smugglers, poachers and thieves who use the old desert paths to avoid detection by the authorities. For such men, siwa is as important as ever. The oasis still offers water and respite from the elements. It is also a place where they can lay down their heads, gather their strength and wait out any agents of law and order that seek them them out. The men who come here may be dangerous but they come looking for a place to lay low, not a place to make trouble.
All of this combines to make a settlement that is lazy by day and quiet by night.
But siwa is not quiet this night. On this night there is no laying of heads. No gathering of strength. No respite and certainly no mercy. The night's peace has been shattered by blood curdling screams and desperate halting bursts of gunfire. Tonight those who have come to siwa for save heaven find that it is anything but and those locals who call this place home, who have some sense of what is happening in their ancient settlement, wisely shut their doors to the outsiders in their midst and huddle in their mud brick homes.
And in the narrow streets the slaughter continues and one voice rings out again and again, angrily asking the same question to every soul unfortunate enough to be selected for interrogation.
"where is bushman?!"
the question will echo long through the night, it will be repeated again and again over the hours until it is seared into the minds of the locals and added to their stories of this night. But it will not be answered. Before the morning is through the avatar of the old god will leave this place will depart unsatisfied. Leaving siwa to return to its quiet forgotten existence, albeit with one more harrowing tale to add its thousands of years of history.
***
now
moon knight makes no sound as he drops from the building in a flush of silver fabric and lands in a dark and dirty alley way. The glowing eyes of his costume narrow as he looks upon the mess of flesh and bones before him. It is has been shoved into a corner in the back of the alley and is all but invisible in the darkness, but moon knight can see every gruesome detail.
Another vagrant dead. Torn apart by....some thing. This was the fourth case in as many weeks that he knew about and the police were no closer to solving the case then they were a month ago. Marc suspected that this had something to do with where the crimes were being committed and who the victims were. The men and women of the nypd were, for the most part, dedicated and hardworking civil servants, but like all civil servants their priorities were set by the city at large and a few dead homeless people, no matter how mutilated their remains may be, were never going to be considered a matter of the utmost concern. It was an injustice that marc had to force from his mind.
one problem at a time he reminded himself as he leaned in closer to the body and began examining it.
It was a fresh kill, hadn't begun to smell yet, so he knew he killer couldn't be too far away. Like all the others it showed signs of extreme violence, the likes of which could have been caused by a rabid animal. But the animal would have to be extremely large, too big for a dog, perhaps a small bear. Whatever it was, it ripped into this man with the same viciousness as the others. But there was something else.
Marc leaned in closer and noticed for the first time the odd scrapes on the bones and the fact that there were organs missing, not just ripped out, but nowhere to be found. It was as if something had been eating this man. This was a disturbing thought and marc thought back to the other victims. Of the previous three, he had only been able to examine two, having found them before the police did. Both showed the same signs of attack and it was clear that whatever killed those men also killed this man but this was the first one who had been fed on.
Marc went over what he knew.
Something was hunting new york's homeless. It was attacking them. It was killing them. And now it was eating them too.
What he knew was frustratingly close to nothing.
A woman's scream fills the air and moon knight turns his head in the direction of the sound.
The homeless killer would have to wait. Somewhere, out there in the night, was someone alive and in need.
The "Nuff' Said" Marvel Universe Application
Character you would like to play (please include the color and font you plan on using to portray the character): Peter Benjamin Parker / The Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man
Brief History (provide at least two sentences): Peter Parker was born the only child of Richard and Mary Parker. The Parkers, who worked as CIA agents, frequently had to leave Peter in the care of Richard's older brother, Ben Parker, and his wife, May Parker. One fateful day, they were both killed in a plane crash, and Peter's aunt and uncle became his official caretakers. Peter was only six years old.
As he grew older, Peter showed signs of academic genius. Unfortunately, this - combined with Peter's social ineptitude - made him an easy target for cruelty from his peers growing up. At Midtown High School, where Peter was the star pupil, he never truly had friends. His aunt and uncle were the closest people in his life. Everything changed the day that Peter attended a public science exhibit. During one of the demonstrations, a spider was irradiated by a particle beam. The radioactive spider bit Peter on the hand, transforming his genetic code.
Peter gained all the amazing abilities of a spider - proportional strength which allowed him to lift many tons, superhuman reflexes, incredible agility making him many times faster than the average person, the uncanny ability to adhere to any surface, and a sixth "spider-sense" which alerted Peter to impending danger. Peter first tested his skills in a wrestling match against Crusher Hogan, defeating him easily and making some quick cash. Using his incredible intellect, Peter developed a synthetic web-like substance and wrist-mounted shooters to release it. He dubbed himself Spider-Man and quickly became a television sensation, using his newfound abilities to earn money for himself as well as his aunt and uncle.
When a man robbed the television station after Spider-Man had just finished filming, Peter had a chance to stop the man from escaping. However, cocky and unconcerned, Peter watched as the robber escaped. A few days later, Peter returned home to a grisly sight. His beloved Uncle Ben had been shot and killed. Spider-Man confronted the killer in an abandoned warehouse, discovering to his horror that the man was the same robber who Peter allowed to escape. Struck with grief and guilt, Peter at last began to understand Uncle Ben's famous words: "With great power comes great responsibility!"
Determined to redeem himself, Peter began to use his powers for good, and Spider-Man became New York City's friendly neighborhood superhero. Peter began selling pictures of Spider-Man to the Daily Bugle, whose editor, J. Jonah Jameson, held a relentless vendetta against the wall-crawler. Upon graduating from Midtown High, Peter enrolled at Empire State University on a science scholarship. There, he met Harry Osborn, who became Peter's best friend after rocky beginnings, and the lovely Gwen Stacy, his first true love (not counting Betty Brant). Spider-Man battled many dangerous enemies, including the megalomaniac Doctor Octopus and the mysterious Green Goblin. His responsibilities came at a cost: leading to the deaths of Captain George Stacy, one of Spider-Man's staunchest supporters, and his beloved Gwen. His own best friend, Harry Osborn, even turned against him for a time and took up his father's mantle, but none of this swayed Ol' Webhead. He fights for those who can't because it's his responsibility. There's no turning your back on it.
Group your character is aligned with (if applicable): None.
Explain what you plan to do with the character you've chosen and why you've chosen this character: Unlike the powers-that-be at Marvel, I won't mess with a working formula. The late 80's/early 90's Spider-Man is, in my opinion, the purest incarnation of the character. He has a strong supporting cast, good recurring villains, an on-again/off-again relationship with the flighty Mary Jane Watson, and he's still struggling to find his footing in the world. This is the Spider-Man I want to emulate.
Why Spider-Man? Well, that's not hard to answer, is it? Spider-Man is who we all like to think we are. He's an outcast, he's down on his luck, he never seems to catch a break. He's a superhero, but he deals with normal people problems: love, grief, guilt, financial instability. Moreover, Peter recognizes that he's not perfect. When we meet Peter Parker in Amazing Fantasy #15, he's vengeful and cocky. Spider-Man first sets out to prove the world wrong about Peter Parker. But as he grows, he learns that he has nothing to prove to anyone besides himself. Spider-Man never stops trying, no matter what life throws at him. That kind of blind optimism is inspiring. We all want to be Spider-Man because we all want to believe that we're just as good at heart as Peter Parker is.
Do you have an Instant Messenger? Which one, and what is your screen name?: MSN - [email protected]
If you know how to post pictures, please provide a picture of your character you wish to be used for the Character Roster (if you do not know how, or do not have a preference, please say so and a default picture shall be picked for you):
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Please provide a small sample post with original content in the style that you plan to write your character in (must be at least 3 paragraphs long and contain at least one line of dialogue):
"Hello, this is Edwin Jarvis, and you've reached the Avengers Mansion. How might I direct your call?"
"Hey, hi, um... I need to speak to the Avengers," I say sheepishly into the payphone. "Preferably Iron Man or Thor or something, but really any Avenger will do. I'd even take Ant-Man."
I hear a sigh on the other end of the line. "Sir, this is not a personal line. If you'd like to speak to the Avengers--"
"It's an emergency!" I bark. When I'm met with silence, I add, "Please?"
"One moment, sir." Seconds later, the British man on the other end of the phone asks, "Who might I say is calling?"
"Umm... Spider-Man."
Silence. "Goodbye."
"No, wait! I'm serious! This is Spider-Man, and there's a--" Click. Dialtone. Reaching into the concealed pocket on my costume, I take out two more quarters and flip the pages of the phone book furiously. Punching the numbers with extreme urgency, I begin tapping my foot as it begins to ring.
"Hello, this is Reed Richards--"
"Reed! Oh, thank God! Listen--"
"--and you've reached the Fantastic Four's automated phone line. If you're calling to request an interview or a talk show appearance, press 'one' now. If you're calling about an endorsement--"
I slam down the phone, and not a moment too soon. As my Spider-Sense begins to buzz, I hightail it out of there with a double back handspring. Less than a second later, a giant robotic foot stomps down on the spot where the payphone once stood. I hear the glass shatter with a crunch.Okay, Spidey. So a giant robot is rampaging through Manhattan, and you can't count on the Avengers or the Fantastic Four to help. I gulp, staring up at the massive autonomatron. It towers above the street at more than ten stories tall. Its limbs are thicker than school buses. "Sure. I'll shoot a web at it. That oughta do something, right?"
Times like these? I hate being Spider-Man. You just know that Daredevil never has to deal with this kind of stuff. Oh well. It should make a good story to tell my grandkids - assuming I live long enough to have grandkids. Because if this giant robot doesn't kill me, Mary Jane certainly will because I'm going to be late to dinner... again. I suppose I could tell her that a giant robot held me up. Yeah... that would go over well.
"Down here, Iron Giant!" I yell. The robot turns its massive glowing eyes at me. Wait a minute... I don't remember its eyes glowing. Come to think of it, they seem to be getting brighter. And redder. And... Holy crap, it has laser eyes! I leap out of the way just in time, snagging the robot's shoulder with a webline and swinging around behind it.
As I clutch to its giant, metallic back, I can't help but think of that scene in Empire Strikes Back where the Millennium Falcon hides by docking on the side of a Star Destroyer. Good movie. If I survive today, I'll have to watch it again soon. Hey! That reminds me...
Anchoring a webline against the robot's hip, I begin swinging in large arcs around its legs. After my fourth or fifth pass, the robot begins to struggle. The web begins to constrict, pulling its legs closer and closer together until... "Bingo!" The robot's knees buckle, and it begins to topple like a tree in a forest. I release my webline and land a few yards behind the fallen behemoth. "I... can't believe that actually worked." I smirk. And Aunt May said those movies were too violent and that I shouldn't be watching them.
I web the robot to the street until my web cartridges are emptied. That should hold him until someone way more qualified than me can come around and pick up this hunk of scrap metal. I switch out my empty cartridges for fresh ones and begin on my merry way towards the Upper West Side. If I make good time, I might still make it on time for dinner with Mary Jane. I just pray that the trademark Parker luck doesn't rear its ugly head because everything's going right for a change.
And that usually means that something ugly is just around the corner.
Wow. Well, that... went smoothly.Huh. No challengers.
Whaddya know.
Spider-Man is Approved!