(...and now we return to more funny reasons from a writer who is oblivious to these two characters. Warning: Please don't chuckle until you've correlated key joke references with Batman/Spider-man Historian SIAT first....)
Reason #9 Spidey's outfits have more coolness and personality than Batmans.
For example, Spidey once wore a costume that was alive. None of Batman's outfits have ever even come close to coming alive, although many have become quite ripe.
(
disclaimer:
Again, please cross reference this funny claim with SIAT, since I know nothing of these characters I am joking about. I know...i know, these jokes would be even funnier if i had ever picked up a comic book over the years when i first started collecting these two titles when they first came out. I'll try and go back and actually READ my entire collection someday soon so we can all benefit from better humor, but heck, who actually READS any of their comics in their collections these days??. )
Even more, (
rumor has it) that Spider-Mans alien black outfit once got pregnant and even gave BIRTH to another costume!!

Specifically, The Black Venom costume gave birth to a kid costume that later became a reddish-brown outfit named "Car-Hart"...worn by Cletus Kassidy.
Now, pul-ease ....tell me, ...
has Batman's outfit EVER done anything as cool as this!??? Not a single DC writer has managed to work in a single story about costume pregnancy nor giving birth.
Now if Marvel would only take the next step and promote something more positive like "costume abstinance" I'd be even more impressed. JOEY Q??????
I mean, sure...Batman has a cool looking outfit, a spiffy yellow utility belt, and of course........his
cape, but Spider-man has a cape too! What superhero doesn't!??! (
sorry...i've not read any spidey comics nor have i seen any of the movies or the cartoons....so its an honest mistake!!)
Even more, Spidey has worn a paper-bag costume over his head instead of his mask. Tell me,...
Is Batman really cool enough to pull THAT off???
How about the fake, non-pregnant, (boring old cloth) version of the black outfit?? Has Batman ever dared to wear a fake outfit based on one of his original ones??
Lastly, ...what about the more recent red and gold Iron Octopus Armor outfit Iron-man made him?? (
or so I've heard...) Could Batman pull off moveable appendages on his outfit if Steele made one for him like that??
So, Spidey's History of cool outfits makes Batman's boring outfit(s) PALE in comparison. Until Batman's bat emblem gives birth to a new costume, Spidey wins this catagory too, hands down! (
unless, of course, SIAT disagrees....)
