What is the dumbest excuse given when someone turned you down?

My dumbest excuse was dumping a girl because her best friend looked like Mariah Carey when she was really hot so I slept with her instead and then I got beat up by her brother and his stupid gang and then I didn't want to park in that area of the high school anymore because I knew they'd be there waiting for me so I parked across the street at McDonald's but my ex was there with the Mariah Carey lookalike and they saw me and gave me the beatbox *psh* and I smiled and waved at them and bought a Big Mac the end.
 
You forgot the part where you yelled "Yo homes, to Bel Air".
 
I used to smile and say "no thanks, my boyfriend wouldn't like that" (*have a name ready for the obligatory followup question, girls), but now I've gotten with the times and decline by promising a facebook add :up:

I'm usually turned down by the same polite methods.
 
Just now on Facebook chat

Me: Hey, can you bring me down some Swiffer pads?
My Sister: No.
Me: Why not?
My sister: My legs turned into snakes.

:dry:
 

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