Was christened as a baby, and went to a CofE school were bible stories were told in assemblies and the lords prayer said every morning.
My mum doesn't like labels, but she has always believed in God and some form of heaven and a soul.
When I was about 10 my mum got involved with a little christian spiritualist church, which I used to go along too and get readings from mediums. I've been again in later life but cannot see it through the eyes of anything but a skeptic.
I spent my teens reading a lot about paganism and wicca, even getting involved with a coven. We used to do rituals on solstaces and I even used a spell to get rid of my acne (which involved washing your face in salt water - the 'magic' part was just a bit of chanting in front of a mirror
).
Also had a bit of interest in Thelema's basic principals of following the soul's true path, and being free to do whatever it takes to do that as long as it doesn't hurt anyone.
Beyond that, considered myself agnostic mostly.
That was generally due to my own instincts. If I lost something important, I'd instinctually pray to God that I find it. And because of stuff like that, I thought 'well I do kind of believe in him then'.
But I've recently come to realise that 'instinct' is just social conditioning. Like a form of brainwashing that I just can't shake.
It doesn't mean I believe in God. Because I really really don't. It just means it's hard for me to completely severe things that are engrained in me from such a young age.
I now consider myself an atheist, and I believe there is no God.
I find religion absolutely fascinating and have many religious friends.
My best friend converted to Islam a few years ago and married her husband (also an English Muslim convert). I completely do not understand her beliefs, and have my doubts that she is actually being honest with herself about them - but I will always be supportive. I even filled in for her father at the wedding (as a heavy Roman Catholic, he didn't approve).
I even wrote my dissertation for my journalism degree on the following subject: 'How the negative depiciton of Islam in the media since 9/11 has effected public opinion of the faith', which was a big eye opener about accepting the information we are fed on face value.
I have recently been back in contact with my Dad who is an atheist buddhism (buddhist monk actually) and I have found I agree with a lot of his philosophies and would like to look further into the practice of buddhism.
But I will never understand theistic belief. It seems so illogical to me.
