This is going to suck.
I don't get it. I don't understand how Hollywood has been able to get a great story like The Three Musketeers wrong so many times. Maybe it's just one of those stories that should be left in the past. But we've already had one bad version with Kiefer Sutherland, Charlie Sheen and Chris O'Donnell, followed by a butchered Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon version starring that *****e from Grey's Anatomy.
And now we have this new version which, despite some interesting casting choices, will undoubtedly be a failure because Paul Walking Suckfest Anderson is at the helm. Why is this guy still allowed to make movies? He's what Uwe Boll would have been had he been able to kick off his career of raping video game movies a few years before Internet blogs became popular. But since Anderson was able to take a dump on things like Mortal Kombat before the Internet really caught on, he's been somehow able to escape the massive Internet backlash that he so wholeheartedly deserves. Don't get me wrong, people still b**ch up a storm about him, but they've been so blinded by the Uwe Boll's massive cloud of suck that often, Anderson gets lost in the mix.
And to make matters worse... The Three Musketurds is going to be in 3D. Well, amen to that brother! I can't tell you how often I've thought about how much I need to see muskets firing up close! And since I've never been to France, it will just kick radical ass to be able to feel like I'm actually THERE with the use of 3-D technology. Even though this movie will probably be filmed on a farm in Wisconsin. An MUSTACHES! I REALLY NEED TO SEE MUSTACHES IN 3D!!! Just imagine how much better Magnum P.I. would have been if Tom Selleck's trademark 'stache had been shoved right into your f**king face. You could almost taste the cookie crumbs.