A Discussion on Self Harm.

[webhead9707]

Many of you have probably seen, through instagram or the news, something going around called the Lines Project. The Lines Project is an effort to help those who self harm, and reach out to them.

What are your thoughts on self harm?
Personally, I have sympathy for them, I would never do it, I'm lucky enough to have perspective and realize how good I actually have it. Unfortunately, a lot of people don't seem to have the perspective of the grand picture, which is sad to me. Also, maybe parents should be a little more responsible about their kids getting razors/knives, just a thought. What do you guys and gals think?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

My baby mama was a cutter when she was in her teens/late teens. She was kinda screwed up in the head, luckily once she had our daughter she really took on the role of a good mom and knocked off most of her stupid BS, MOST of it not all

 

[Figs]

I also have sympathy towards a lot of them. I've actually known a few people who would cut themselves when we were younger. They say the physical pain is a bit of a release from whatever emotional problems they are going through.

Of course you'll get those jumping in this thread just like when it comes to someone who killed themselve judging away as if they know for a fact that they have worse problems or upbringing then the people doing this and they didn't cause themselves harm so they are superior. Lulz...

 

[Superwoman Prime]

Is it fairly common among teenagers? Unbalanced hormones may have a lot to do with it.

I did when I was thirteen and fourteen. I can't explain why, other than it was cathartic somehow.

 

[webhead9707]

My baby mama was a cutter when she was in her teens/late teens. She was kinda screwed up in the head, luckily once she had our daughter she really took on the role of a good mom and knocked off most of her stupid BS, MOST of it not all

Maybe the kid was a good distraction. Often times that's what these people need, something to live for. To know that someone out there needs them.

I also have sympathy towards a lot of them. I've actually known a few people who would cut themselves when we were younger. They say the physical pain is a bit of a release from whatever emotional problems they are going through.

Of course you'll get those jumping in this thread just like when it comes to someone who killed themselve judging away as if they know for a fact that they have worse problems or upbringing then the people doing this and they didn't cause themselves harm so they are superior. Lulz...

Yeah, there's always those people. And I get what they're saying, yeah, most of the kids are over dramatic and they should just be thankful to have a roof over their heads and meals to eat at night, and to an extent I agree, but I consider myself to be a loving person and that won't help these people get better. Most of these (Normally) kids are just lonely. They need someone to be there.

Is it fairly common among teenagers? Unbalanced hormones may have a lot to do with it.

I did when I was thirteen and fourteen. I can't explain why, other than it was cathartic somehow.

I don't even go to public school but I know at least 5 people that have told me that they've done it at some point. All teenage girls, actually. Although one of them claimed One Direction got her through it, at which point I stopped taking her seriously. Let's be honest, harming herself was probably an involuntary reaction to listening to One Direction.

That was probably insensitive...Sorry.:P

 

[enterthemadness]

Adults self harm as well. A number of things cause it. Anger issues, being lonely as in not having a GF/BF. Feeling all hope is lost, frustration, stress. Speaking from experience it's just a bad coping method/tool.

 

[Figs]

Yeah, there's always those people. And I get what they're saying, yeah, most of the kids are over dramatic and they should just be thankful to have a roof over their heads and meals to eat at night, and to an extent I agree, but I consider myself to be a loving person and that won't help these people get better. Most of these (Normally) kids are just lonely. They need someone to be there.

It's always possible that some of the kids hurting themselves are overreacting over something that's not too bad. Like you said, life isn't always all that bad if you have a roof over your head and aren't starving. With that being said though, you never know what some kids have to deal with in their home. Possibly overly abusive parents or even dealing with getting molested. Who knows, I try not to judge people that might have it 10X worse than I do in some way or another.

 

[webhead9707]

Adults self harm as well. A number of things cause it. Anger issues, being lonely as in not having a GF/BF. Feeling all hope is lost, frustration, stress. Speaking from experience it's just a bad coping method/tool.

Yeah, I get that. Personally, when I need to cope, I normally either play guitar or run a mile or two. Or skateboard. I feel like there are better coping methods out there if people could just be introduced to them.

It's always possible that some of the kids hurting themselves are overreacting over something that's not too bad. Like you said, life isn't always all that bad if you have a roof over your head and aren't starving. With that being said though, you never know what some kids have to deal with in their home. Possibly overly abusive parents or even dealing with getting molested. Who knows, I try not to judge people that might have it 10X worse than I do in some way or another.

Exactly. I've said this before, but whether you believe in Jesus as a savior or not, I think most people would agree that the guy had the right ideas. We (as a society) need to stop being so quick to judge and be a little faster to extend a helping hand. Never look down on someone unless you're helping him/her up.

 

[NickNitro]

Some people do it for attention which I hate.

 

[Hyde]

I have several friends who have self-harmed or do self-harm and whenever I see scars on their wrist, well, it makes me feel bad. I think only one person I know did it for attention, but she's kinda ****ed up anyway.

There's only so much you can do to help the people who do when they're so convinced that their life is ****.

 

[NickNitro]

My co worker has scars all up and down his arms, long ones. We never really brought it up or asked but work is he says he woke up one night in an alley with the cuts. We think he used to self harm and is embarrassed by it.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

I have sympathy for them, sure. But I'll never understand WHY someone does it. What I mean by that, is I understand why depressed people turn towards hedonistic escapist pleasures such as drinking and drugs to feel better, but I'll never understand how driving a knife through one's skin provides relief. It seems if you cut yourself you're even more messed up than if you drink or do drugs to forget your pain, because there's so much self-hatred involved in mutilating yourself like that. I do have a lot of sympathy for them like I said though, because it seems like it's mostly younger kids who have had pretty tough upbringings.

 

[NickNitro]

It's because you're nto a self harmer JJJ. usually its a mental illness accompanied with deep depression.

People who self harm don't necessarily just cut, alcoholics are self harmers as well. All drug addicts are too. I can definitely see it as being a chemical imbalance.

 

[zeroapoc]

My co worker has scars all up and down his arms, long ones. We never really brought it up or asked but work is he says he woke up one night in an alley with the cuts. We think he used to self harm and is embarrassed by it.

I have scars that I lie about too. It's not really that I'm embarrassed, it's just nobody's business.

 

[NickNitro]

It just is beyond me to hurt myself....I could never see myself doing it. Also these kids who hurt animals...cats and dogs....torture them....These types of character types are soo foreign to me.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

It's because you're nto a self harmer JJJ. usually its a mental illness accompanied with deep depression.

People who self harm don't necessarily just cut, alcoholics are self harmers as well. All drug addicts are too. I can definitely see it as being a chemical imbalance.

Sure, I understand that. But do you get my point, that there's a difference between turning to booze or drugs that's bad in the long run but make you feel good in the now, and physically cutting yourself with a kitchen utensil? You are right. They're both self-harm. But I understand the point of the former, I don't get what the latter achieves. I used to binge-drink to forget bad stuff in my life, but getting cut has never made me feel better. So I can't understand it for the life of me.

 

[NickNitro]

Yeah I see where you're coming from. Some people find a sense of self release, a sense of feeling something....anything.....pain is a very weird sensation. People accompany pain with pleasure all the time....especially in the bedroom.......there is a parallel with pain and a release of pleasure.....

 

[zeroapoc]

Well it's been 20 years since I did anything like this so my memory has faded a bit. But I can tell you that's it's not a matter of associating pleasure and pain. More like something to focus on. Hard to explain.

 

[NickNitro]

I'm not trying to associate all cutters pains with pleasure, but trying to bridge a gap between pain as in "ouch" with pain as a release of emotion.

 

[BestGirl]

I have sympathy for them, sure. But I'll never understand WHY someone does it. What I mean by that, is I understand why depressed people turn towards hedonistic escapist pleasures such as drinking and drugs to feel better, but I'll never understand how driving a knife through one's skin provides relief. It seems if you cut yourself you're even more messed up than if you drink or do drugs to forget your pain, because there's so much self-hatred involved in mutilating yourself like that. I do have a lot of sympathy for them like I said though, because it seems like it's mostly younger kids who have had pretty tough upbringings.

I read a post by a woman online who said that, when she was a teen, she used to go on these long crying jags, which sounds like depression to me. Anyway, after she was done, she would cut herself. She said it made her feel so good and gave her a rush, like being on a drug.

 

[redhawk23]

What I have often wondered is how so many people settle upon the same act. Is it because it is a known option in our culture?

 

[hopefuldreamer]

When I was a young teen people used to self harm for fun. Things like sticking pins through their skin, getting other people to cut them.

There used to be this trend called 'smilies' which was when you got a clipper lighter really hot and burned your skin so it'd leave a mark like a smiley face.

I think people did it to look 'hardcore' or something. I never really got into it then (just a bit of a pain wimp ).

It wasn't until we started getting a bit older that I noticed the odd person was doing it a lot more seriously. I knew this one girl who was so bad her scars were all the way up her neck and chest... it was pretty scary to me. And i've had a friend actually try to kill himself that way, with a vertical cut.

Then when I was about 24, I went through a period of extreme depression for about a year or so, and it was at this point that I started secretly self harming (the tops of my legs because I didn't want anyone to see).

It is difficult to explain why it makes you feel better.

I know at the time, every single second of every day was painful. It was like torture. I was daydreaming about suicide all the time, and I was just going to the park after work with a bottle of cider and laying in the grass crying and drinking and wishing I didn't have people who loved me so that I could just die without hurting anyone. Nothing brought me happiness, not drink or drugs or friends or family. I felt nothing but this crushing ache in my chest.

So I guess the hot stinging feeling of a cut was comforting because it was just a different kind of pain from what I was feeling inside. And I so badly wanted an escape from that pain.

It's bizzare thinking back on it now, because that whole period of my life is pretty far behind me, and thankfully I came back from it without having to be medicated.

But I definitely think that's what it was for me.

 

[The Guard]

I've had people tell me they do it to remind them of what is real, like during a severe flashback.

 

[jaymes_e06]

Does anyone (who cares to say) actually suffer or did suffer from this at one point explain why they did it?

 

[moviedoors]

I have sympathy for them, sure. But I'll never understand WHY someone does it. What I mean by that, is I understand why depressed people turn towards hedonistic escapist pleasures such as drinking and drugs to feel better, but I'll never understand how driving a knife through one's skin provides relief. It seems if you cut yourself you're even more messed up than if you drink or do drugs to forget your pain, because there's so much self-hatred involved in mutilating yourself like that. I do have a lot of sympathy for them like I said though, because it seems like it's mostly younger kids who have had pretty tough upbringings.

Because believe it or not, it does make you feel better in the moment. I did it a bit in the past and when you have a fresh, stinging, bloody cut, it gives you a reprieve from feeling consumed and overwhelmed by whatever emotional distress is flooding your brain. There's also a hell of an endorphin rush as well. I could be crying and crying or be fuming with angry frustration over something that was ailing me and it would relent if I just let some blood out. I also used to smack myself in the head in moments of extreme frustration. It had a way of snapping me out of it.