My Brother Threatened to Kill Me

[Sofa]

Please excuse me if you were being sarcastic in your previous post. It was not apparent.

I was not being sarcastic. Thats my point entirely. I can use any adjective i choose to use to express my emotions at any given moment.

And if you dont like those adjectives...oh well.

EDIT: May i ask how you presume to know what has and has not been asked to the person in question?

 

[Outsiderzedge]

I was not being sarcastic. Thats my point entirely. I can use any adjective i choose to use to express my emotions at any given moment.

And if you dont like those adjectives...oh well.

EDIT: May i ask how you presume to know what has and has not been asked to the person in question?

Yes, I am free to dislike or disagree with anything you say and I am also free to comment about it.

As for what they have or have not asked, I assumed it.

 

[Sofa]

Dont.

 

[DOG LIPS]

I could round up my homies and we could Cryme Tyme him. Canada isn't THAT far from me.

No need to get that brutal.

 

[Master Chief]

A hardcore beating could either set him straight, or make him worse. But then again I doubt the dude's gonna sit down for a little cliche discussion about "what's the dealio b**ch?! " So. I dunno. Sign him up for a shrink. lol. Drug him and tie him to the shrink's couch.

 

[The Watchman]

****. i just want him to stop being unresonable. o at least. speak nicely. thats it. he can do whatever the **** he wants with his life as long as he doesnt **** up the lives of anyone else in our family.. id take his ass to a psychologist but im not the parents here

Here's the thing, you have to make him realize his anger towards people and getting pissed off at stupid things leads to unnecessary stress and anxiety for him. It'll end up alienating him from his family, and the person who will suffer most is him, what kind of life is that, to walk through life like that. It isn't necessarily his fault either, be could be suffering from a chemical imbalances, and there isn't any way to fix something like this without meds, avoiding the problem isn't going to make it go away. This is a common problem, but his behavior is far from acceptable.

Basically you have to approach the issue very carefully. Don't focus on how he's affecting the family, but rather that you want him to get help - for himself, because you do care about him, and want to see him get better and live a happier life.

I know where you're coming from with this, I've seen it first hand, and the hardest part is making the person realize they actually need help and how much better they'll feel after they do.

 

[Colossal Spoons]

No need to get that brutal.

What's so brutal about a boot to the face and a carjacking?

 

[Outsiderzedge]

Dont.

Do you know whether they have tried talking to him or not?

By "talking to him," I mean asking him if anything it wrong or if anything is bothering him, etc.

 

[DOG LIPS]

What's so brutal about a boot to the face and a carjacking?

Well, can I at least be the narrator while you do it?

 

[Sofa]

Do you know whether they have tried talking to him or not?

By "talking to him," I mean asking him if anything it wrong or if anything is bothering him, etc.

No, i dont. Ive been with the guy for almost two years, but i never leave my home. I live like a hermit and rarely see him, or visit him.

 

[jaguarr]

Okay, I know you're not gonna want to hear this. It's gotta be said.

You need to kick your brother's ass. And I don't mean punch him once or twice. I mean, quite possibly, put him in traction. From what I can tell, he's in a state where he thinks he's king. He's not. Someone needs to make a man out of him. He's not going to listen to reason. If you challange him, he's going to run. You need to chase him. Beat the holy **** out of him. Since you're over 18, yes, this could very well get you in a lot of legal trouble. But if your folks are not for using meds, and your brother doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground apparently, someone's gotta stand up to him. With no disrespect meant, it's pretty obvious your dad isn't going to, and it's not your mom's place. Once you show him that you [as a group] are not scared of him, then he's ess tee eff you. From there, you can take more rational paths to saving your family. Blood may be thicker than water, but it's no fun to swim in, if you get my meaning.

Pretty much the take I offered on it, too. You obviously had a brother. Anyone who's not a male who had a brother probably isn't fully going to understand this concept. It comes down to dominance in the family structure and sometimes there's only one way to put a stop to the bullying crap that comes from someone who's decided that they're the alpha male and is abusing that position (whether deserved or reflective of reality or not).

jag

 

[DOG LIPS]

A hardcore beating could either set him straight, or make him worse. But then again I doubt the dude's gonna sit down for a little cliche discussion about "what's the dealio b**ch?! " So. I dunno. Sign him up for a shrink. lol. Drug him and tie him to the shrink's couch.

I dunno about fighting. The guy will probably just call the mounties and press maple syrup charges with his moose gloves.

 

[Master Chief]

I dunno about fighting. The guy will probably just call the mounties and press maple syrup charges with his moose gloves.

Or he'd murder everybody.

 

[DOG LIPS]

Or he'd murder everybody.

With what? A sock full of loonies?

 

[Outsiderzedge]

Pretty much the take I offered on it, too. You obviously had a brother. Anyone who's not a male who had a brother probably isn't fully going to understand this concept. It comes down to dominance in the family structure and sometimes there's only one way to put a stop to the bullying crap that comes from someone who's decided that they're the alpha male and is abusing that position (whether deserved or reflective of reality or not).

jag

So his brother is trying to be the "alpha male" in the family?

Your post is condescending...

I understand fully what you are saying, but I find it stupid. If what you proposed is the case here, then these people, as well as you, are alien to me and I find it hard to care what happens to any of you.

"Dominance" in the family?

What are you? Animals?

Grow a brain and evolve. Then we'll talk.

 

[jaguarr]

So his brother is trying to be the "alpha male" in the family?

Your post is condescending...

I understand fully what you are saying, but I find it stupid. If what you proposed is the case here, then these people, as well as you, are alien to me and I find it hard to care what happens to any of you.

"Dominance" in the family?

What are you? Animals?

Grow a brain and evolve. Then we'll talk.

I don't care what you think, you saucy little tart.

jag

 

[Alpha and Omega]

From my gist of VD's initial post, advising him to engage in an physical conflict with his brother probably isn't the best thing.

It seems as if his brother is potentially searching for reasons to erupt; if he's retaliating at simple, harmless verbal remarks, challenging him could have unwanted consequences . . . incidental serious or fatal injury.

VD should probably confer with his parents before he decided to act or try something like that; if both brothers still live at home, an altercation could unfavorably complicate or escalate matters to an even worse extent. [His parents do not need additional stress or woe.]

If VD's brother isn't open to communication, I seriously doubt a physical beating would influence him. In his mind, it might even justify some opinion or secretive reasoning that he already harbors.

Just my take on it though.

 

[Venom Drool]

Here's the thing, you have to make him realize his anger towards people and getting pissed off at stupid things leads to unnecessary stress and anxiety for him. It'll end up alienating him from his family, and the person who will suffer most is him, what kind of life is that, to walk through life like that. It isn't necessarily his fault either, be could be suffering from a chemical imbalances, and there isn't any way to fix something like this without meds, avoiding the problem isn't going to make it go away. This is a common problem, but his behavior is far from acceptable.

Basically you have to approach the issue very carefully. Don't focus on how he's affecting the family, but rather that you want him to get help - for himself, because you do care about him, and want to see him get better and live a happier life.

I know where you're coming from with this, I've seen it first hand, and the hardest part is making the person realize they actually need help and how much better they'll feel after they do.

yes, well hes mentioned before that hes interested in getting help perhaps. im afraid my parents wont follow through on it. but the situation is in the works to being resolved. my dad went to go meet him to lay down some law, hopefully redraw the line that hes crossed. my parents have done what youve suggested Watch, its just a matter of them going all the way through with it.. i think this time..its serious enough that they will...cause threatening me means hes erased my line as well.

in response to outsiderz.. yes weve talked to him..the problem isnt as surface as that where some bullies at school are bothering him. its his state of mind and i feel, like Watch said... that its a mtter of taking medication in order to rectify the situation. it isnt at all that we hate him or blame him for everything, which he accuses us all of doing, its just that he has this issue where he *****es and moans about ****.. or throws him emotions and feelings (misplaced ones) at everyone and everything whether they deserve it or not. I'm going to have to see whether or not my dad is smart enough to fix this thing like it should be fixed..cause he hasnt been the best at expressing gravity and situation to his children since forever...

as far as physical stuff.. well.. perhaps that might rresolve his insulting me all te time and hitting me at his will.... but thats a route i rather not take untill things are tried on other ends.... he needs a beating... but a mental one is required cause he doesnt act this way with his friends.. hes the best friend a guy could have.. hes just an ******* to everyone who recognize that he can be as such

 

[Holly Goodhead]

Make sure he stays on the meds. You'll notice a difference.

 

[Venom Drool]

he was on ritalin as a kid... it actually worked school wise.. to a certain extent anyway...he used to be amazing at math......

 

[jaguarr]

From my gist of VD's initial post, advising him to engage in an physical conflict with his brother probably isn't the best thing.

It seems as if his brother is potentially searching for reasons to erupt; if he's retaliating at simple, harmless verbal remarks, challenging him could have unwanted consequences . . . incidental serious or fatal injury.

VD should probably confer with his parents before he decided to act or try something like that; if both brothers still live at home, an altercation could unfavorably complicate or escalate matters to an even worse extent. [His parents do not need additional stress or woe.]

If VD's brother isn't open to communication, I seriously doubt a physical beating would influence him. In his mind, it might even justify some opinion or secretive reasoning that he already harbors.

Just my take on it though.

Possibly. He may just need to be taken down a peg or two. Hard to tell unless we were involved in the situation directly, I suppose. Ultimately, VD's folks need's to step up and handle things, though. They have a son who needs some counseling and possibly some medication. They also have a responsibility to protect VD from assault by his brother, and if that means throwing him out and making him fend for himself then that might be an option as well. Sounds like VD and his brother both have a pretty nice deal set up for them while they go to school that may not be fully appreciated by his brother.

jag

 

[Outsiderzedge]

I can't say I really approve of medication, but if his therapist believes he needs it, then whom am I to disagree. I would try to help him without medication first, then as a last resort, have him take it.

When he has another one of his outbursts, ask him why he is acting the way he is and what he is thinking at that moment. Sometimes, a little patience and understanding is all it takes to fix a problem someone is having.

 

[Venom Drool]

we do have a 'sweet deal' as it stands right now.. im working my way to live on my own within the next couple of years.. just need to regulate spending actually

 

[Venom Drool]

I can't say I really approve of medication, but if his therapist believes he needs it, then whom am I to disagree. I would try to help him without medication first, then as a last resort, have him take it.

When he has another one of his outbursts, ask him why he is acting the way he is and what he is thinking at that moment. Sometimes, a little patience and understanding is all it takes to fix a problem someone is having.

again.. its past this point. grasp the idea that we have a mother who has infinite patience.... hes consumed with being right that any attempyt that suggests he is wrong in any shape or form rubs him into yelling fits

 

[jaguarr]

again.. its past this point. grasp the idea that we have a mother who has infinite patience.... hes consumed with being right that any attempyt that suggests he is wrong in any shape or form rubs him into yelling fits

Honestly, your brother just sounds like a spoiled ass.

jag