*Official* Relationship Advice Thread Strikes Back

[AndThePickles]

I think I never went in the old relationship advice thread cuz relationships have been nonexistent for so long.

Glad to see I'm not the only one who works a ton billy, now spoons can pick on someone else.

I have two jobs, one in sales and the other working for the bands during their concerts here.
I know for a fact a guy I work with likes me, but I don't want to date people I work with, and at the concert gig, the vuys who talk you up are trying to get discounts or free stuff or are so drunk that they're flirting with everyone

I'm not against dating at all, I guess I've just been 'lazy' for lack of a better phrase.

It's so important to make time for yourself and for social fun,though! It doesn't have to be a relationship, but just going out on a few dates would probably be a lot of fun for you.

 

[Aesop Rocks]

I don't know what I can tell ya. Although, the whole "never will" is a bit on the dramatic side.

I LIKE LINKIN PARK!

 

[BillyZaned]

Well, I mean, if the girl is hot let's say, chances are she doesn't have just you on her mind. So if you want said hot girl, she's going to want a little proof you're worth the time.

However, about not catching vibes? You gotta work at it. Or look up from your drink. o.o

Sometimes you gotta put them out yourself.

I've always found girl's are alot less shallow then men.. meaning, just because a guy is good looking, doesn't mean she's interested...

so, knowing that, you need to make yourself stand out... be funny, confident, unimpossing, approachable, all that good stuff

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

Yeah, dating would probably be something you'd enjoy quite a bit.

I'm not a big fan though.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

I've always found girl's are alot less shallow then men.. meaning, just because a guy is good looking, doesn't mean she's interested...

so, knowing that, you need to make yourself stand out... be funny, confident, unimpossing, approachable, all that good stuff

I'm not sure if girls are more shallow, but we definitely seem to come off that way. So yeah, I agree. Gotta do something to distinguish yourself.

 

[BillyZaned]

I'm not sure if girls are more shallow, but we definitely seem to come off that way. So yeah, I agree. Gotta do something to distinguish yourself.

less shallow

 

[Hound55]

ha, my girl is the same way... she say's i just take a really bad picture... and when I even have one drink, I get that shiny face thing going because even one beer makes me sweet for some reason... lol...

You know the effect just one drink has on you..?

In my country that would be enough basis to have you extradited...

Also, I don't understand the "I want to approach her but I can't think of anything to say."

I'm possibly the most socially awkward human being on the planet, probably because I'm never at a loss for words, the issue's not "having nothing to say" in my perspective its making that crossover from making small talk to subtley informing the other person that I'm interested without having them look for the emergency exits...

My own secret is not to look and assume no female would ever want to go out with me and just talk with everyone on those terms... because on those terms I can actually HAVE some semblance of confidence. Just talking with people and being me.

I'm a pretty funny guy and some women can often confuse that with being more important than other things, by the time they realise that I've got major self-confidence issues and despise myself almost as much as everyone else on the planet they're already on board the SS Hound.

 

[amazingfantasy15]

Yeah, I agree with Surley, or Shully, or Suremaster, that women need to grow a spine and approach men. Why do us men always have to do it? Let's say if I did have confidence and ****...and I see a hot woman in public...doesn't mean I should make the first move.

Maybe you could do with a little spine growing as well. You've really just gotta look for the body language, signals she's not even really aware she's sending, playing with her hair, leaning in closer when talking to you, mimicking movements, subtle stuff, but things you can notice, it you're looking.

I did ask her out.

We were both done with classes (her for the day, me for a couple hours), she mentioned that she was going to go get lunch, and I asked her if she'd like to grab lunch together, her and I.

She said that she didn't really have too much time to grab lunch together that day. So I resigned myself to the fact that she was just saying that because she wasn't interested. But as we continued our conversation, she told me that she was going to be free on Monday or Tuesday, and that we should get together for lunch on one of those 2 days instead. But I couldn't get ahold of her when I needed to find out just what time and where to meet, basically set it all up.

You asked her out for lunch, on the spot, when she had plans already. That's not rejection, that's having plans, the second asking, wasn't really asking since you didn't make specific plans. How did you try to get a hold of her, do you have her number? Or just planning on talking after class first, you've got to make a specific plan a couple days in advance. Monday or Tuesday, somewhere is not a plan, when you see her next ask when she's free and suggest a place to go. From what you're writing you're showing no confidence and believe you've already failed and acting like that you will. Also, you've gotta know how to adapt, have a back up idea, if you're original won't work, before I call a girl up for a first date I come up with 2-3 ideas for what to do, so if plan A doesn't work for her, I've got plans B and C to fall back on.

A). Not hung up on her.
B). Never will.
C). Not anymore.

You will, you just haven't yet, went out on probably 6-7 first dates over the summer, all of them seemed to go well enough, but didn't really click, there wasn't that spark. Didn't get discouraged though, then met the girl I'm seeing now and felt that spark and things are going great. You just gotta keep looking.

 

[BillyZaned]

Aesop... your obviously gay... so, just accept it and move on

 

[Aesop Rocks]

Aesop... your obviously gay... so, just accept it and move on

I own gay? It's mine? Why haven't I started suing for money yet?!



your=possession
you're= you're= you are.

learn2spell.

Example

Wrong: your an idiot
Correct: You're an idiot.

 

[BillyZaned]

I own gay? It's mine? Why haven't I started suing for money yet?!



your=possession
you're= you're= you are.

learn2spell.

Example

Wrong: your an idiot
Correct: You're an idiot.

wow, way to be a *****e... I'm sure you have never spelt anything wrong on here ever, huh? No wonder you can't get a freaking date, or even get your cherry popped... have fun looking at your 1982 Sears catalog tonight in your cold bed... jackass

 

[Aesop Rocks]

wow, way to be a *****e... I'm sure you have never spelt anything wrong on here ever, huh? No wonder you can't get a freaking date, or even get your cherry popped... have fun looking at your 1982 Sears catalog tonight in your cold bed... jackass

You have a lot of repressed anger.

Why is that?

Edit:

Oh and no, I just know the difference between your and you're. Simple elementary school knowledge. Come big man, you learnt you and education real goodz, amirite?

 

[BillyZaned]

I'm cool man... no anger here at all....

 

[Aesop Rocks]

I'm cool man... no anger here at all....

It's not your fault.

 

[Nell2ThaIzzay]

You asked her out for lunch, on the spot, when she had plans already. That's not rejection, that's having plans, the second asking, wasn't really asking since you didn't make specific plans. How did you try to get a hold of her, do you have her number? Or just planning on talking after class first, you've got to make a specific plan a couple days in advance. Monday or Tuesday, somewhere is not a plan, when you see her next ask when she's free and suggest a place to go. From what you're writing you're showing no confidence and believe you've already failed and acting like that you will. Also, you've gotta know how to adapt, have a back up idea, if you're original won't work, before I call a girl up for a first date I come up with 2-3 ideas for what to do, so if plan A doesn't work for her, I've got plans B and C to fall back on.

You're right.

No, I didn't get her number, I was supposed to meet with her on campus (not in class), but I haven't even seen her in class since then either, so unless she's skipping class to avoid me (unlikely, right???? lol), there's probably another reason why I didn't see her when I was supposed to.

So when she does come to class again, and I see her, I'll be sure to get her number this time.

 

[Anita18]

It's so important to make time for yourself and for social fun,though! It doesn't have to be a relationship, but just going out on a few dates would probably be a lot of fun for you.

Dating casually actually makes me anxious. I'm not good at first impressions and I get nervous meeting new people. Heck, I'm lucky if I make a scheduled plan to go out once a month. And if it's multiple people involved in said casual dating, forget it.

But I'm pretty chillax and extremely introverted. If ComicChick is taking the effort to work two jobs, one of them in a fairly social setting, then dating could be fun for that kind of personality.

Maybe you could do with a little spine growing as well. You've really just gotta look for the body language, signals she's not even really aware she's sending, playing with her hair, leaning in closer when talking to you, mimicking movements, subtle stuff, but things you can notice, it you're looking.

I don't know any girls who play with their hair. It comes off really ditzy to me.

But yeah, if a girl's interested, there will be at least some smiling and laughing involved.

No, I didn't get her number, I was supposed to meet with her on campus (not in class), but I haven't even seen her in class since then either, so unless she's skipping class to avoid me (unlikely, right???? lol), there's probably another reason why I didn't see her when I was supposed to.

Maybe she's sick or had some family emergency. If you're not already close to her, there are a bunch of reasons why she hasn't been around.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

I'm going to go with some form of emergency (sick/family), because she also isn't around campus, nor showing up to class.

Unless she's an odd one, and totally rearranges her life to avoid you.

You're not some creepy stalker type, are you Nell?

 

[ComicChick]

It's so important to make time for yourself and for social fun,though! It doesn't have to be a relationship, but just going out on a few dates would probably be a lot of fun for you.

I do need to do more social stuff. Sometimes I'm too tired to go out after work and fortunately I'm one of those people who can have a night to myself. Lately I've been a little self conscious since the surgery cuz of my stitches

Today was the first day I've gone out without my hair covered up, I did an updo and it felt good to not worry about it.

A couple of us are doing dinner, drinks (maybe) and a movie friday, which we usually do twice a month.
As for a real date, its been a long time since I've been on one

 

[Nell2ThaIzzay]

I'm going to go with some form of emergency (sick/family), because she also isn't around campus, nor showing up to class.

Unless she's an odd one, and totally rearranges her life to avoid you.

You're not some creepy stalker type, are you Nell?

lol no, im nostalker haha. but um, is it safeassume that the moral of the story here is that i over reacted (something i need to stop doing) and that my next course of action is to simply reschedule, with plans that are a ait more concrete?

 

[Nell2ThaIzzay]

I'm going to go with some form of emergency (sick/family), because she also isn't around campus, nor showing up to class.

Unless she's an odd one, and totally rearranges her life to avoid you.

You're not some creepy stalker type, are you Nell?

lol no, im nostalker haha. but um, is it safeassume that the moral of the story here is that i over reacted (something i need to stop doing) and that my next course of action is to simply reschedule, with plans that are a ait more concrete?

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

lol no, im nostalker haha. but um, is it safeassume that the moral of the story here is that i over reacted (something i need to stop doing) and that my next course of action is to simply reschedule, with plans that are a ait more concrete?

lol Yah. Just seek her out, ask what's up. That shizzle. You'll probably be fine.

 

[terry78]

I'm going to go with some form of emergency (sick/family), because she also isn't around campus, nor showing up to class.

Unless she's an odd one, and totally rearranges her life to avoid you.

You're not some creepy stalker type, are you Nell?

Asking vice versa on this board would probably garner a higher percentile.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

I somehow doubt she's the creepy stalker. =l

 

[Vort]

lol no, im nostalker haha. but um, is it safeassume that the moral of the story here is that i over reacted (something i need to stop doing) and that my next course of action is to simply reschedule, with plans that are a ait more concrete?

Let me give you Vort's "how to get a date" 101.

Be confident.


That's it. I do not like generalizations, but in my experience girls do not like guys who are not confident in themselves. They are turned off by it.

But if you are confident in yourself and/or act that way it will be a big difference.

Take it from someone who had no confidence while in school, I can say that it was very hard for me dating.

Once out of school I gained confidence in myself, and the difference was huge. Even after being married and going bald (something which does not bother me at all..again confidence) I have been asked on many a date or "hook up" by women, not that I have taken up any offers since marriage.

A friend of mine a few years back asked me how women were so interested in me, and I gave him this answer. He later asked around our office about "which guy in the office would you like to date" and it seems the majority said me. When asked why they all said it was how I carried myself, confidence or something similar.

I only put this here because you seem rather unconfident in yourself with this girl.

Remember, doing this doesn't mean that you will get a date everytime, but remember to be confident even when turned down. Other girls look at this and seem to be impressed.

Again, I hate generalizations and I am sure there are women who may be different, but this works via personal experience.

 

[enterthemadness]

I own gay? It's mine? Why haven't I started suing for money yet?!



your=possession
you're= you're= you are.

learn2spell.

Example

Wrong: your an idiot
Correct: You're an idiot.

wow, way to be a *****e... I'm sure you have never spelt anything wrong on here ever, huh? No wonder you can't get a freaking date, or even get your cherry popped... have fun looking at your 1982 Sears catalog tonight in your cold bed... jackass

*****e's are funny. like Dane Cook.


Why would someone in 2009 have a Sears 1982 catalog? this comeback makes no sense. Was it a awesome issue? Should I google it?