One time I got really drunk and...

[katie_girl09]

Good man. I make vomit a habit of drinking. If I drink more than a pint of liqour I always vomit twice and drink a pint of water before I sleep it off.

Wuss.

 

[Speedball]

Not that part, the day after with the other two fellas and them fighting over you. Awkward times i'm sure...

Well... one was my ex, the other was this guy who isn't allowed back, he lives about 45 minutes north. The third guy is a friend of my ex and the guy who's birthday it was, my ex had passed out when we got home and we fooled around in the shower for about... oh... two hours or so... The guy who I'm saying is my ex was my ex at the time, just make it clear that I wasn't cheating on him.

 

[Spidey-Bat]

I've never been drunk so I will tell the story about my roommate.

I had 3 other roommate so there were 4 of us in total. It was the weekend before finals started in December. One of my roommates went home for the weekend so it was just 3 of us. It was around 1:30am and I was on my computer still while my other roommate, we'll call him "Sven" (He's from Norway) was asleep. My other roommate, "Joe", comes in. He stumbles when he enters the room, he walks to his desk and his pants start to fall off. He walks by Sven's bed to the fridge and says "What the ****'s up, Sven?" Then he starts telling us about his evening: "Me and Josh were playing beer pong and we kept winning and getting wasted. I drank one of the cups and it tasted nasty. Then we came back and went to his dorm. We had some whiskey but some chick who I know from the band saw us and we got written up." Then he climbed into his bed (top bunk) and started talking about the Yankees: "Brett Gardner is going to hit 300 and steal 50 bases next year. Robinson Cano is going to hit 30 home runs." Then he looks at his clock and says "2:09...hey that's my area code" and he's really fascinated by it. Later he has to go pee and practically falls off his bunk and then just lays there laughing. He did that about 5 times over the next hour. Me and "Sven" were laughing at him until like 3am.

 

[Wiseman]

Wuss.

 

[Aesop Rocks]

One time I got really drunk (right now) and decided it would be fun to go to a forum about Twilight and express my true feelings about the movie.

I guess I was instantly banned?

Must have been my user name...oh well.

 

[knowsbleed]

Nothing exciting ever happens to me when I'm drunk. You all are so very lucky. I wish I could have some unique and glorious tales to share as well.

 

[Aesop Rocks]

Let's get drunk together and see what happens there~

 

[Wiseman]

please post more. I want to live vicariously through you.

Fine, but I'm gonna post the good with the bad. This is a long story but worth it, and I know some people might look down on me for how I used to live my life but we all make mistakes, the past is the past.

Ok, so the summer when I was 19 I owned a Trans am, I was a manager of a store, I thought I was hot ****, I was, over the three month summer, sleeping with 6 different women. My girlfriend, her sister, her cousin, her best friend, some lesbian, and my ex girlfriend. My girlfriend knew about her best friend and the lesbian because we were having threesomes with them, she did not know about the other 3. I'm only saying all this to set up the time period. In july of that year, i got jumped and was in the hospital for a while, on August 17, me and my two best friends were drinking all day along with some girl they just met the night before that they tag teamed. We were wasted by 4pm, I decided it'd be a great idea to go to the guys house that was responsible for me getting jumped. We drove there and I started banging on his door and yelling for him to get out. Nobody answered so I took a baseball bat out of my car and started smashing his car windows with it. He came out, I hit him on the side with the bat, then grabbed the back of his head and kept slamming my knee into his face(broke his jaw, and nose and a couple teeth got knocked out) then I pulled out a knife and told him if I ever saw him again I was going to kill him.........We leave and go to Burgerking cause again, we were wasted and were still drinking in the car so we were hungry. We go in, order our food, my one friend kept taking his shirt off(cause that's just something he did when he was drunk) and we were all being really loud and obnoxious. They kept telling us to leave, we didn't, they called the cops. Then we started destroying crap inside the restaurant. We got in the car, I went around to the drive-through and did the biggest brake stand ever, like I mean the whole building was covered in smoke. At this point I began speeding, when the wrong way down a one way street, my friend in the backseat and that girl I didn't even know started having sex. I ran into somebodys small tree, kept going, and finally after fishtailing for what seemed like forever I crashed the car in a field. I wasn't wearing my seatbelt and when the car went of the road it flipped foward and then did multiple flips side to side while I was hanging on outside the car. Finally the car stopped upside down, with me trapped under the top of the car hood. My one friend had a warrent for his arrest for violating probation so he pulled me out and ran, my other friend and that girl were stuck in the back seat. I stopped breathing and my heart stopped beating....Paramedics came, brought me back to life, pulled out the two from the back seat naked, I was unconscious until I woke up in the hospital when they were x-raying my arm which I broke in 3 different spots. In the waiting room of the hospital was my girlfriend, my ex girlfriend, and a whole bunch of other people who should not be in the same room at once. There was a bunch of arguing and a couple fist fights and everyone who was there for me got kicked out of the hospital. My friend that ran away after the accident was caught 3 weeks later and spent a year in jail. At the end of the day I broke my arm in three places, my nose, 2 ribs and I had road rash all over my body that took months to heal. I was on probation for 3 years, paid 5,000 dollars worth of fines and lost my job. And I had some serious cleaning up to do with all that went on in the waiting room. So, I lived large that year, was king **** till August, and then it finally caught up with me.

 

[Bruce Banner]

Being 21 for me isn't exactly different bc I was partying before then anyway If anything I party less which is kinda sad. But I went on my first camping trip back in April and ended up staying at the cabin on stilts alongside of the mountain. The first day I was ok. But the next day around noon. Everyone wanted to play some card game called A$$hole. I don't really remember the rules to the game but I ended up drinking alot of Makers Mark and too much Beer. Anyway around 1 O'Clock during the ongoing games still at the rank of the "a$$hole" and was so drunk that I couldn't deal the cards.

Anyway everything became a blur but I ended up running down the mountain at full speed tripping up over my own feet and face planting myself into the gravel trail at high speed. I ended up passing out and didn't really wake up till 10 the next day. Its the last time I will play that game and probably the last time I'll go camping.

 

[knowsbleed]

Fine, but I'm gonna post the good with the bad. This is a long story but worth it, and I know some people might look down on me for how I used to live my life but we all make mistakes, the past is the past.

Ok, so the summer when I was 19 I owned a Trans am, I was a manager of a store, I thought I was hot ****, I was, over the three month summer, sleeping with 6 different women. My girlfriend, her sister, her cousin, her best friend, some lesbian, and my ex girlfriend. My girlfriend knew about her best friend and the lesbian because we were having threesomes with them, she did not know about the other 3. I'm only saying all this to set up the time period. In july of that year, i got jumped and was in the hospital for a while, on August 17, me and my two best friends were drinking all day along with some girl they just met the night before that they tag teamed. We were wasted by 4pm, I decided it'd be a great idea to go to the guys house that was responsible for me getting jumped. We drove there and I started banging on his door and yelling for him to get out. Nobody answered so I took a baseball bat out of my car and started smashing his car windows with it. He came out, I hit him on the side with the bat, then grabbed the back of his head and kept slamming my knee into his face(broke his jaw, and nose and a couple teeth got knocked out) then I pulled out a knife and told him if I ever saw him again I was going to kill him.........We leave and go to Burgerking cause again, we were wasted and were still drinking in the car so we were hungry. We go in, order our food, my one friend kept taking his shirt off(cause that's just something he did when he was drunk) and we were all being really loud and obnoxious. They kept telling us to leave, we didn't, they called the cops. Then we started destroying crap inside the restaurant. We got in the car, I went around to the drive-through and did the biggest brake stand ever, like I mean the whole building was covered in smoke. At this point I began speeding, when the wrong way down a one way street, my friend in the backseat and that girl I didn't even know started having sex. I ran into somebodys small tree, kept going, and finally after fishtailing for what seemed like forever I crashed the car in a field. I wasn't wearing my seatbelt and when the car went of the road it flipped foward and then did multiple flips side to side while I was hanging on outside the car. Finally the car stopped upside down, with me trapped under the top of the car hood. My one friend had a warrent for his arrest for violating probation so he pulled me out and ran, my other friend and that girl were stuck in the back seat. I stopped breathing and my heart stopped beating....Paramedics came, brought me back to life, pulled out the two from the back seat naked, I was unconscious until I woke up in the hospital when they were x-raying my arm which I broke in 3 different spots. In the waiting room of the hospital was my girlfriend, my ex girlfriend, and a whole bunch of other people who should not be in the same room at once. There was a bunch of arguing and a couple fist fights and everyone who was there for me got kicked out of the hospital. My friend that ran away after the accident was caught 3 weeks later and spent a year in jail. At the end of the day I broke my arm in three places, my nose, 2 ribs and I had road rash all over my body that took months to heal. I was on probation for 3 years, paid 5,000 dollars worth of fines and lost my job. And I had some serious cleaning up to do with all that went on in the waiting room. So, I lived large that year, was king **** till August, and then it finally caught up with me.

Well damn, how the hell can I follow that one up?

 

[Aesop Rocks]

Not survive it.

It's cool. There's respawn in RL.

 

[Wiseman]

Well damn, how the hell can I follow that one up?

You already said you didn't have any good stories, remember:

Nothing exciting ever happens to me when I'm drunk. You all are so very lucky. I wish I could have some unique and glorious tales to share as well.

 

[Aesop Rocks]

 

[knowsbleed]

Well now I don't!

You might as well close this thread now... your story is like this:

and in comparison, our stories will be like this:

 

[Wiseman]

That might be the most awesome thing anyone has ever said to me

 

[knowsbleed]

LARPing usually brings out emotions that have never been felt before.





I got really drunk and my friend body-slammed me in front of a crowd of people because I shouted to everyone that he was still a virgin. I don't remember any of it so everything worked out in the end except for him still being a virgin.

 

[Drakon]

Nothing exciting ever happens to me when I'm drunk. You all are so very lucky. I wish I could have some unique and glorious tales to share as well.

I'm sure you have ONE, at least.

 

[Prison Mike]

Fine, but I'm gonna post the good with the bad. This is a long story but worth it, and I know some people might look down on me for how I used to live my life but we all make mistakes, the past is the past.

Ok, so the summer when I was 19 I owned a Trans am, I was a manager of a store, I thought I was hot ****, I was, over the three month summer, sleeping with 6 different women. My girlfriend, her sister, her cousin, her best friend, some lesbian, and my ex girlfriend. My girlfriend knew about her best friend and the lesbian because we were having threesomes with them, she did not know about the other 3. I'm only saying all this to set up the time period. In july of that year, i got jumped and was in the hospital for a while, on August 17, me and my two best friends were drinking all day along with some girl they just met the night before that they tag teamed. We were wasted by 4pm, I decided it'd be a great idea to go to the guys house that was responsible for me getting jumped. We drove there and I started banging on his door and yelling for him to get out. Nobody answered so I took a baseball bat out of my car and started smashing his car windows with it. He came out, I hit him on the side with the bat, then grabbed the back of his head and kept slamming my knee into his face(broke his jaw, and nose and a couple teeth got knocked out) then I pulled out a knife and told him if I ever saw him again I was going to kill him.........We leave and go to Burgerking cause again, we were wasted and were still drinking in the car so we were hungry. We go in, order our food, my one friend kept taking his shirt off(cause that's just something he did when he was drunk) and we were all being really loud and obnoxious. They kept telling us to leave, we didn't, they called the cops. Then we started destroying crap inside the restaurant. We got in the car, I went around to the drive-through and did the biggest brake stand ever, like I mean the whole building was covered in smoke. At this point I began speeding, when the wrong way down a one way street, my friend in the backseat and that girl I didn't even know started having sex. I ran into somebodys small tree, kept going, and finally after fishtailing for what seemed like forever I crashed the car in a field. I wasn't wearing my seatbelt and when the car went of the road it flipped foward and then did multiple flips side to side while I was hanging on outside the car. Finally the car stopped upside down, with me trapped under the top of the car hood. My one friend had a warrent for his arrest for violating probation so he pulled me out and ran, my other friend and that girl were stuck in the back seat. I stopped breathing and my heart stopped beating....Paramedics came, brought me back to life, pulled out the two from the back seat naked, I was unconscious until I woke up in the hospital when they were x-raying my arm which I broke in 3 different spots. In the waiting room of the hospital was my girlfriend, my ex girlfriend, and a whole bunch of other people who should not be in the same room at once. There was a bunch of arguing and a couple fist fights and everyone who was there for me got kicked out of the hospital. My friend that ran away after the accident was caught 3 weeks later and spent a year in jail. At the end of the day I broke my arm in three places, my nose, 2 ribs and I had road rash all over my body that took months to heal. I was on probation for 3 years, paid 5,000 dollars worth of fines and lost my job. And I had some serious cleaning up to do with all that went on in the waiting room. So, I lived large that year, was king **** till August, and then it finally caught up with me.

is all I have to say.

 

[SpideyInATree]

In my earlier twenties things were out of control with the drinking. It was mostly just me and my friends sitting around getting plastered and playing video games like Street Fighter, etc.

The only good story I have is it was like May 2003 and it was my friend's moms' birthday. She was getting free beers for everyone and it was Coors Light. I don't really like that stuff too much but it was free. It was also the first time I ever had light beer so it was going down VERY EASY. I had about twelve beers in a three hour period.

We were all pretty plastered and, yes, we had a designated driver. The whole way to my apartment we were screaming, "DESIGNATED SHAUN! DESIGNATED SHAUN!" And, from what I remember, Metallica's Master of Puppets was on the radio was, from second hand knowledge I was banging my head out the window at people screaming "SATAN! SATAN!" Now the neighborhood I lived in during that time was very, how do you say?, GHETTO. It was a very black dominated neighborhood.

When I'm at home with a few of my friends I get a call from this girl I had been talking to and she wanted to hang out with me. Being drunk as hell I'm like, "YES!". So, I go down her house, which thankfully was only a few blocks away, and she is wanting to party. So, basically as I was slightly sobering up from my beers she pours me shot after shot of vodka. Then she smokes a joint with me. It's at this point that I don't remember CRAP! AT ALL!!! It's the only time in my life that I've blacked out and had absolutely no control of my actions.

I wake up in the morning in her bed and it felt like I had millions of people jumping up and down inside my head. Quick lesson for the newbie drinkers... "Beer before liquor, never sicker!", Remember I told you that. So, I look at my surroundings....there's the girl next to me...naked...I'm naked...and I'm like..."All right! I freakin' got laid! Great night!" Well, I keep looking around and...some quick back story...this girl lives with two other girls. Now the girl I was talking to was no supermodel or anything but she was an average looking girl. Now her roommates...now they were like disgusting hog looking creatures. The one was like 38 and had worts on her face. The second roommate was EASILY 300lbs. Well, they were in the room too. One was sprawled out on a bean bag chair and the other was just on the 300lb one was on the floor like a beached whale. She was completely naked and, yes, there were used condoms all over the floor.

It was VERY obvious what had happened to me that night. So I went to the bathroom and commenced to throw up for a long, long time. Now to this day I don't really know if it was just the alcohol consumption or just that I was disgusted by the large fat woman on the floor. But I learned a lesson that night. DON'T drink a lot around horny fat chicks!!!!!!

It was actually the last time I drank heavily and cut down immensely on alcohol consumption. I then turned to marijuana as my drug of choice and did that for a few years and it was a much better time than alcohol. Heh. Sorry for the super long story but that was the most insane thing that has ever happened to me drunk.

 

[Prison Mike]

I like these stories. They make me feel better about myself. Keep them coming!

 

[BatMatt]

I have plenty, I just don't remember them. Although I did push some lady Jets fan down a hill while tailgating at a Buffalo Bills game once, I was a season ticket holder so I had a lot of stories that fall

 

[knowsbleed]

In my earlier twenties things were out of control with the drinking. It was mostly just me and my friends sitting around getting plastered and playing video games like Street Fighter, etc.

The only good story I have is it was like May 2003 and it was my friend's moms' birthday. She was getting free beers for everyone and it was Coors Light. I don't really like that stuff too much but it was free. It was also the first time I ever had light beer so it was going down VERY EASY. I had about twelve beers in a three hour period.

We were all pretty plastered and, yes, we had a designated driver. The whole way to my apartment we were screaming, "DESIGNATED SHAUN! DESIGNATED SHAUN!" And, from what I remember, Metallica's Master of Puppets was on the radio was, from second hand knowledge I was banging my head out the window at people screaming "SATAN! SATAN!" Now the neighborhood I lived in during that time was very, how do you say?, GHETTO. It was a very black dominated neighborhood.

When I'm at home with a few of my friends I get a call from this girl I had been talking to and she wanted to hang out with me. Being drunk as hell I'm like, "YES!". So, I go down her house, which thankfully was only a few blocks away, and she is wanting to party. So, basically as I was slightly sobering up from my beers she pours me shot after shot of vodka. Then she smokes a joint with me. It's at this point that I don't remember CRAP! AT ALL!!! It's the only time in my life that I've blacked out and had absolutely no control of my actions.

I wake up in the morning in her bed and it felt like I had millions of people jumping up and down inside my head. Quick lesson for the newbie drinkers... "Beer before liquor, never sicker!", Remember I told you that. So, I look at my surroundings....there's the girl next to me...naked...I'm naked...and I'm like..."All right! I freakin' got laid! Great night!" Well, I keep looking around and...some quick back story...this girl lives with two other girls. Now the girl I was talking to was no supermodel or anything but she was an average looking girl. Now her roommates...now they were like disgusting hog looking creatures. The one was like 38 and had worts on her face. The second roommate was EASILY 300lbs. Well, they were in the room too. One was sprawled out on a bean bag chair and the other was just on the 300lb one was on the floor like a beached whale. She was completely naked and, yes, there were used condoms all over the floor.

It was VERY obvious what had happened to me that night. So I went to the bathroom and commenced to throw up for a long, long time. Now to this day I don't really know if it was just the alcohol consumption or just that I was disgusted by the large fat woman on the floor. But I learned a lesson that night. DON'T drink a lot around horny fat chicks!!!!!!

It was actually the last time I drank heavily and cut down immensely on alcohol consumption. I then turned to marijuana as my drug of choice and did that for a few years and it was a much better time than alcohol. Heh. Sorry for the super long story but that was the most insane thing that has ever happened to me drunk.

HAHA!!! I love this story. HAHhahahahahAHHAhaaha...


horny whales...


hahahahahhhahaaa...




*ahem*














AHAhahahHAHHAHAHHahahahaaaahaoaarrrr

 

[The Guard]

At least there were condomns used...

Right?

 

[SpideyInATree]

I like these stories. They make me feel better about myself. Keep them coming!

Good. Should teach you that if you're going to drink alcohol to drink it responsibly. Catch a buzz and leave it at that. Or just don't drink it at all.

 

[SpideyInATree]

At least there were condomns used...

Right?

Exactly. Probably the only positive note that happened and that I have no memory recollection of the actual events. Glad it happened though because if it didn't I probably still would have drank heavily through that summer.