Stupid People Doing Stupid Things Thread - Part 1

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Teen Who Set Rare Tortoise on Fire Now Faces Underage Sex Charges

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Florida teen Jennifer Greene announced her candidacy for Worst Human of 2014 last month when she and a friend set a protected gopher tortoise on fire repeatedly, stomped it to death, and posted the video on Facebook. Now she may have established herself as the frontrunner: The 18-year-old is now facing charges for allegedly being sexually involved with an underage boy.

The boy, whose age hasn't been made public, told investigators Greene engaged in multiple sex acts with him. According to an arrest report obtained by Fox 30, their relationship started when the two were playing hide and seek behind an Orange Park, Fla. home.

The boy told police he initiated things by asking to see Greene's boobs, and she "then consented to perform various sexual acts, including oral sex," Fox 30 reported.

Because Greene was only 17 at the time, multiple sources originally reported she would be charged as a juvenile for lewd or lascivious battery—defined in Florida as engaging in sexual activity with a child older than 12 and younger than 16.

The Florida state's attorney's office now plans to prosecute her in adult court. She faces up to 15 years in prison, in addition to the five years she already faced for animal cruelty.

http://www.firstcoastnews.com/story...ortoise-torture-suspect-sex-charges/13390635/

Good, the longer we can keep this psycho off the streets the better
 
Man Jailed For Drunk Driving With 100 Chickens in His SUV

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A Nebraska man is now in jail for 108 days after being sentenced Tuesday for a DUI and livestock neglect after being pulled over for driving drunk with 100 chickens in his SUV.

Luis Motola-Palacio, of Grand Island, was pulled over during a routine traffic check on Jan. 31 of this year—authorities discovered 100 chickens, half of which were dead, crammed in the back of his car. Fifty-eight of the chickens survived, while the remaining 42 perished, crushed under the weight of their brethren.

Police arrested Motola-Palacio for assault in 2013 when he shot Michal Garcia-Rivera in the leg at close range, during an argument as they butchered a pig in a garage.

http://www.1011now.com/centralnebra...uelty-to-Chickens-247313251.html?device=phone

Seriously, wtf?
 
Man Accused of Sticking Needles in Packaged Meat "For the Hell of It"

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Ronald Avers, a 68-year old man from Belleville, Ill., is charged with allegedly placing sewing needles in packaged meat products for over a year at a local Shop'n'Save.

From the Associated Press:

The criminal complaint filed Wednesday against Ronald Avers said one buyer of boneless chuck roast at the Shop 'n Save store in Belleville just east of St. Louis later bit into one of the needles, and a needle slipped into a steak stuck another customer.

The affected meat products range from ground beef to roasts to steaks, reports the Belleville News-Democrat. An affidavit filed alongside the criminal complaint notes that Avers was identified via surveillance camera footage, allegedly "manipulating" packages of meat that he never purchased. Store security alerted the authorities Tuesday after the suspect entered the store on a motorized scooter with an oxygen tank in tow.

When approached by authorities, Avers clarified his actions, saying, "Every now and then, I would stick one in a hamburger." He explained further, stating, "Mostly hamburger, a couple of times I did it with a roast, maybe a pork chop every now and then."

Court documents state that Avers, described as a disabled veteran, concealed the needles in the holder for his oxygen tank prior to inserting it in the product.

Avers faces seven counts of tampering with consumer products, each of which holds a maximum of 10 years in prison. When presented with this fact in court on Thursday, Avers was reportedly shocked, shouting "Oh God!"

The suspect is currently jailed without bond and faces a hearing on Monday.

The hell is wrong with this old guy? Pretty demented hobby
 
Good to hear, people that abuse animals are scum as far as I'm concerned
 
Christ, man, really? Everyone's world is viewed through a damn smartphone. Put the phone down and rip the guy off her. You're getting raped publicly and everyone is crowded around you filming it. Yeah, thanks.


My thing is…what are these people going to do with it? Post it on FB…Twitter…(and get banned when it's finally noticed, reported) Why tape it to begin with? They're just as messed up for taping it…:csad:
 
Man Bites Another Man's Fingertip Off at Beyoncé-Jay Z Concert

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According to Pasadena police, 11 people were arrested at the Beyoncé-Jay Z concert at the Rose Bowl Saturday night. Among the arrested was Roberto Alcaraz-Garnica, 25, of San Diego, who allegedly bit a man's fingertip off after groping the man's girlfriend.

Pasadena police Lt. John Luna told the Pasadena Star-News that eight people were arrested Saturday night for public drunkenness and two for ticket scalping at the venue. Alcaraz-Garnica, meanwhile, was arrested on "on suspicion of sexual battery and mayhem, legally defined as disabling or disfiguring a part of a victim's body."

"The suspect sexually assaulted the female victim," Luna said. "The woman's boyfriend confronted the alleged groper, and a fight ensued."

It was during that fight that Alcaraz-Garnica bit the man's fingertip off.

http://www.pasadenastarnews.com/gen...oncert-at-rose-bowl-10-other-arrests-reported

Dude must have been getting his butt kicked pretty good if he had to resort to biting off fingertips
 
Cool Kid Trespassers Broke Into House, Baked Some Drug Brownies

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Police say that two teenagers in the Philadelphia suburbs broke into an area home in July, and weren't satisfied with just the one crime. While lurking around a house that didn't belong to them, they decided to cook up some "drug brownies" for kicks.

The two 17-year-old boys were found in a house in Perkiomen Township with over two pounds of an "unspecified drug" used to make the brownies and drug paraphernalia, as well. Police aren't sharing what exactly the drug was the teens were found with, but if we had to hazard a guess, we'd go with, you know, weed.

The teens have been charged in juvenile court for their alleged culinary prowess and trespassing.

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/storie...ROWNIES?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT

Why would you break into someone's house to do this?
 
Woman Allegedly Tries to Steal Police Car With Two Officers Inside

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A woman was arrested yesterday after allegedly trying to steal a police car while two plainclothes officers were inside, according to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

The unmarked police car was parked outside Club Xtaza in Pittsburgh, where an afterparty for a Wiz Khalifa concert was being held.

Ria Buford, 32, hopped in the driver's seat of the police car at about 2 a.m. Police report that she smelled of alcohol. Buford told the two officers—Officer Garrett Spory riding shotgun and the other officer in the backseat—that she was taking the vehicle to her car.

When Spory tried to remove Buford from the car, a man, who refused to give his age or name, intervened. They were both arrested and charged with public drunkenness.

Buford was additionally charged with disorderly conduct and robbery of the motor vehicle.

http://www.post-gazette.com/local/c...ying-to-steal-police-car/stories/201408030168

That is pretty dumb
 
Determined German Teen Drops Phone in Pond, Drains Pond to Get It Back

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Teenagers! They love their phones as if they are humans with real feelings! A German teenager, after accidentally dropping his phone into a pond on a fishing trip, decided to drain the pond in order to get it back. Not that he thought it was working or anything—he just really needed it.

The New York Daily News reports that the 16-year-old sneaked back to the pond after his phone was submerged because the fishermen he was with wouldn't let him jump in and get it right then and there.

Via the NY Daily News:

He sneaked back to the pond hours after the fishing trip ended — armed with pumps and two hoses.

He tried to direct the pond water into the club's toilet, but ended up flooding a parking lot.

This alerted police, who foiled his plan to get his iPhone back.


He was aware that the phone was dead, he says, but he really wanted to get the data back. You know, the good teenage stuff: "numbers, pictures, and videos of my friends."

The teen will be forced to pay for damages to the angling club that were caused by his attempt at draining the pond, and he still doesn't have a phone, nor any of his cool stuff, either.

http://www.nydailynews.com/teen-dra...source=***********&utm_campaign=NYDailyNewsTw

Teens are freaking stupid
 
At least he put some thought on the recovery process and came prepared, too bad the toilet was not linked to the main sewer system.
A stupid teen would have tried to retrieve it with a scuba and diver mask by night and died.
 
NBC Affiliate Spreads Dumb "Contaminated Coke" Scare

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Would you like to see an example of satire? Here is an example of satire: "ExxonMobil, Chevron Locked In Bidding War To Acquire Lucrative Pennsylvania Senator." Would like to see an example of garbage, bad faith "satire"? Here is an example of garbage, bad faith "satire": "Coca-Cola Recalls 2 Million Bottles With The Name 'Michael,' The Reason Why Will Shock You."

The latter story comes from digital trash salesmen Empire News, whose Upworthy-style headline conceals a playground-caliber food hoax about a disgruntled employee spiking sodas with dirt. The shockingly implausible article was an instant hit, amassing over 200,000 since it was published Tuesday.

But among the usual crop of dupes was one that definitely should have known better—Albany's NBC affiliate WNYT. The station ran a story covering the "recall" on Wednesday, citing no source and naming the supposed adulterant as "top soil to be exact."

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Of course, that story is completely untrue. When asked about the allegedly contaminated sodas, an FDA spokesperson directed us to their comprehensive list of firm-issued food recalls. That site dates the last recall of Cokes to 2010.

By Friday, WNYT had scrubbed all mention of the story from their website.

https://archive.today/PVfGv

Gotta love it when journalist are so desperate for a story they don't even bother checking if it's true or not
 
CNN Reporter Who Allegedly Bit Two EMTs: Sorry I Was Drunk

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Arwa Damon, a CNN reporter who's currently being sued for allegedly biting two medics in a drunken rage, apologized for the incident recently via email. The email, obtained by Page Six, begins like so many sorry-I-was-drunk-and-don't-remember-anything notes. "Hey," she writes. Hey.

Damon, who allegedly bit EMTs Tracy Lamar and Charles Simons while they were trying to treat her at the embassy in Baghdad last month, continues her apology email to embassy staff by covering all her bases: "Can you please forward this on to everyone who was involved in helping me out and subjected to my disastrous behavior?"

According to Lamar and Simons's $2 million suit, Damon threatened the two of them in the midst of her biting, claiming she was a "major reporter for CNN." The suit also alleges that CNN knew about Damon's tendency to go on drunken biting sprees when they hired her. According to Page Six, the State Department wrote up a report about the incident and sent it to CNN.

In her email, Damon says the incident was totally a one-time thing, and makes a bunch of classic excuses: "It's been an extremely stressful time, I was exhausted, I had not had proper food all day and clearly miscalculated how my body would calculate the alcohol consumed. I thought I was fine, and then suddenly, clearly, I wasn't."

As of yesterday, CNN was claiming not to know about the lawsuit.

http://pagesix.com/2014/08/04/cnn-r...ow&utm_source=P6Twitter&utm_medium=SocialFlow

I've done lots of stupid stuff while drunk but I'm fairly certain I haven't bit anyone
 
Game of Thrones Reminds Man of Child Left in Hot Car

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According to a police affidavit released today, a Wichita, Kan. foster parent was reminded of the 10-month-old girl he left in his car after seeing a crying child on an episode of Game of Thrones. The foster parent, Seth Jackson, 29, has been charged by police with first-degree murder. Jackson was smoking weed, eating pizza, and watching TV with his partner for about two hours while the child was in the car on a 90 degree day.

According to the Associated Press, Jackson apparently left the 10-month-old in the car after arriving home from picking her up from a babysitter and taking their adopted five-year-old to a doctor's appointment. After watching about one and a half episodes of Game of Thrones, Jackson remembered the 10-month-old in the car, and he and his partner rushed out to the car.

More from the Associated Press:

The partner told investigators the girl was hot and stiff when he grabbed her from the car and carried her into the house. As he called 911, Jackson attempted CPR but could not get the child's mouth open, according to the affidavit filed by Wichita police detective Ryan Schomaker.

"I left her in the car, she's dead, she's dead," police witnessed Jackson saying on the phone when they arrived at the scene.

Foster's partner, the Wichita Eagle reports, had been working in their backyard and went inside after Jackson had already returned home. Foster's partner has not been charged by police in the child's death.

The two were apparently trying to adopt the 10-month-old, and had raised her since she was two-weeks-old. The parents currently have three foster children and two adopted children.

http://bigstory.ap.org/article/police-tv-show-reminded-man-girl-was-car

What the hell? They don't check to make sure these people aren't idiots before letting them become foster parents? How do people foget children in cars?
 
I guess this would go in here.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-28662561




A man has been arrested on suspicion of making a hoax bomb threat after military jets were called to escort a passenger plane to Manchester Airport.
The Qatar Airways plane was escorted in to land by the Royal Air Force following information received by the pilot from a passenger.
Police said the pilot was handed a note about a possible device on board.
Armed police boarded the Doha to Manchester plane and arrested a 47-year-old man.
All flights in and out of the airport were suspended for about 25 minutes.
'Pretty shook up' The plane involved was an Airbus A330-30, which had 269 passengers and 13 Qatar Airways crew on board.

The RAF confirmed Typhoon aircraft were launched from RAF Coningsby in Lincolnshire as part of its "quick reaction alert role" when a pilot requested assistance.
Operations at the airport resumed at about 14:00 BST after the plane landed at a terminal.
Greater Manchester Police said the arrested man, who comes from the North West area, was being held in custody for questioning.
Passengers disembarked the plane "as normal", an airport spokesman said.
Josh Hartley, who boarded the plane at Doha in Qatar, said: "Well when the escort came it was very scary - I'm pretty shook up now."


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Hotel Threatens to Charge Guests $500 for Every Negative Review

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A hotel in Hudson, N.Y., is under fire for attempting to charge guests a $500 fee if anyone in their party left a negative online review.

The policy may not have made Union Street Guest House any money, but it did earn them a 1.5-star rating on Yelp and hundreds of reviews warning potential visitors to steer clear. So they've got that going for them, which is nice.

The relevant section has now been removed from the Union Street Guest House website, but Page Six reports it used to read:

"Please know that despite the fact that wedding couples love Hudson and our inn, your friends and families may not," reads an online policy. "If you have booked the inn for a wedding or other type of event . . . and given us a deposit of any kind . . . there will be a $500 fine that will be deducted from your deposit for every negative review . . . placed on any internet site by anyone in your party."

Owner/manager Chris Wagoner, who is also a local politician, responded that the rule was "put on our site as a tongue-in-cheek response to a wedding many years ago" and was meant to be taken down and was never enforced.

But a Yelp review from last year seems to contradict that. Updating a previous negative review about Union Street's accomodations, Rabih Z. wrote:

The management of this hotel had the gall to email us twice to threaten us financially about the negative review! Here is an excerpt from their first email:

"please note that your recent on-line review of our Inn will cost the wedding party that left us a deposit $500. This money be charged via the deposit they have left us unless/until it is removed. Any other or future reviews will also be charged to the wedding party (bride & groom) from the guarantee they have provided us. "

He didn't follow up to say whether the hotel actually went through with the coercive fee, but his 1-star review still stands, along with hundreds of new ones from people outraged about the policy.

Union Street's Facebook page has also been inundated with links to the Page Six story, and the hotel has been flagged as "permanently closed" on Google Maps, even though it's still in business.

For now, anyway. Hell hath no fury like the Yelp elite scorned.

http://pagesix.com/2014/08/04/hotel-charges-500-for-every-bad-review-posted-online/

I know they say there is no such thing as bad press but I'm not sure that is the case anymore in today's world of social media
 
13-Year-Old Charged With Murder After Allegedly Stabbing Homeless Man

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A 13-year-old Florida boy has been charged with the murder of Thomas J. Bergstrom, 51. Bergstrom was found stabbed to death at a homeless camp on Saturday near Cape Coral.

Bergstrom's friend, Anthony Cashdollar, found him. "I was so shocked, I just sat my hand on his back," he told the Fort Myers News-Press. At first, Cashdollar tried to wake him, but "then it hit me that Tommy was dead."

According to police, the teen charged in the case went missing at the beginning of July but returned home "safe and sound" shortly after. He's being represented by a public defender.

http://www.news-press.com/story/new.../13-year-old-arrested-cape-stabbing/13551691/

They need to lock this psycho up and throw away the key
 
Fourth Grader Suspended for Bringing Nerf Gun to Show and Tell

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A Georgia fourth grader was suspended from school this week after he brought a Nerf gun to class as part of a show-and-tell assignment.

To help the class get to know each other at the beginning of the school year, a teacher at Miller Elementary in Warner Robins, Ga., asked students to bring in a few of their favorite toys to talk about.

Ramsey McDonald's dad, Scott, told WMAZ he thought nothing of it until he got a call Tuesday alerting him that his son had brought "a weapon" to school.

"I asked them what it was and they said it was a plastic Nerf gun," he said.

The Nerf reactor, pictured above, shoots soft foam balls and is rated for ages 6 and up.

As fair and just punishment for doing exactly what the assignment asked of him, Ramsey was initially given a three-day suspension from school. It's since been reduced to three days of in-school suspension.

Scott says that if he'd known Ramsey was planning to take the Nerf gun, he would have told him not to.

http://www.13wmaz.com/story/news/lo...ary-warner-robins-weapon-contraband/13672973/

Zero tolerance at it's finest/dumbest
 
Texas Cheerleaders Still Begging Courts to Let Them Cheer for Jesus

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A Texas high school cheer squad is taking its two-year battle to cheer for Jesus all the way to the state Supreme Court. The Kountze High cheerleaders—go lions!—want the right to put Bible verses on their banners. They asked the state Supreme Court on Wednesday to "recognize [their] speech as private, making any ban a violation of the First Amendment."

The case started back in 2012, when the Freedom From Religion Foundation pointed out that advertising Phil 4:13 at a public school football game violates the Establishment Clause. Kountze banned the Jesus banners, and the cheerleaders then sued the district. The case has been carrying on ever since, even though most of the girls have moved on to college by now and are going through a Buddhism phase.

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Cheerleader Ashton Lawrence did underline her appreciation for other faiths in a statement to CBS News: "If it was a group that was wanting to post not scriptures, but maybe phrases from a different religion they should also be allowed to have their speech." God bless 'em all.

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/texas-cheerleaders-take-bible-banner-fight-to-state-supreme-court/

You can' represent your school much more than being a cheerleader, no religion should be promoted by any official school outing. Very simple
 
Church Canceled Funeral Because Deceased Son Was Gay, Family Says

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The day before Julion Evans' funeral was scheduled to happen at Tampa, Florida's New Hope Missionary Baptist Church, Evans' mother reportedly got a phone call from a pastor. Because the deceased was gay, he said, the church would have to cancel the funeral.

"It was devastating," Julie Atwood, the mother, told NBC. "I did feel like he was being denied the dignity of death."

According to the family, the church learned of Evans' orientation after an obituary in a local paper identified Kendall Capers, his husband and partner of 17 years, as such. Atwood said she was notified of the cancellation during his wake.

T.W. Jenkins, a pastor at the church, stood by the decision. From NBC:

Jenkins said his church preaches against gay marriage.

"Based on our preaching of the scripture, we would have been in error to allow the service in our church," Jenkins said. "I'm not trying to condemn anyone's lifestyle, but at the same time, I am a man of God, and I have to stand up for my principles."


Fortunately, Atwood was able to secure a last-minute venue for her son, who died of an illness called Amyloidosis. But some attendees who weren't aware of the change showed up at New Hope and missed the funeral.

"This is 2014, this is not the 60s or the 70s," Capers told NBC. "So at the end of the day I just want his wrong-doing to be exposed."

http://www.wfla.com/story/26213876/family-says-church-canceled-funeral-because-son-was-gay

Well if there is one thing we know about Jesus it's that he would want them to cancel a man's funeral, we all know Jesus was an outspoken person who advocated fiercely against gay marriage and love :o
 
Brooklyn Lawyer Arrested For Not Actually Being a Lawyer

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A man accused of identity theft was in a federal court today after he was exposed as having impersonated Stephen G. Dickerman, a lawyer with an office in Brighton Beach, Brooklyn that has been involved in at least 12 federal cases since 2012. At his arraignment today, the man's lawyer insisted on the charade, telling the judge, "I can clarify that the name of my client is Stephen G. Dickerman."

"The government has really no idea who the defendant is at this point," prosecutor Lan Nguyen said in court today. Not even the man's fiancé is sure who he really is. Owing to the man's unconfirmed identity, the judge denied him bail.

"I don't know who this gentleman is," Judge Ramon E. Reyes Jr. said.

According to the New York Times, the man took advantage of the lapsed law license of the actual Stephen G. Dickerman, a lawyer with a 40-year career. From the American Bar Association Journal:

In 2009, an individual claiming to be Stephen G. Dickerman showed up at the registration office and received a copy of the delinquent notice form, which included the lawyer's Social Security number, date of birth, the law school he attended and his attorney registration number.

In a section of the form allowing for changes in personal information, the man claiming to be the lawyer wrote that his name was "Shlomo G. Dickerman" and listed a new business and home address, the affidavit says. He signed the form and paid a $350 registration fee. When "Shlomo Dickerman" paid his registration fee the next year, he included a letter explaining that he was using the first name "Shlomo" because it was his Hebrew name. The name change was not made, even as "Shlomo" filed subsequent requests, because legal documentation is required.


To assume Dickerman's identity, the Times reports, the fake Dickerman also listed having received a law degree from New York University. The imposter would charge $400 an hour for his services.

"He did not appear, necessarily, to be a good lawyer; he didn't appear to be a non-lawyer," David S. Stone of Stone & Magnanini told the Times.

But the FBI was apparently suspicious early on and began investigating. From the Times:

By the summer, federal authorities had become suspicious. At a seemingly routine hearing in July on a class-action case that the suspect had filed two months earlier, agents of the Federal Bureau of Investigation quietly observed the proceedings. One of the agents had already met the real Stephen G. Dickerman, the affidavit says.

Two weeks later, two F.B.I. agents, posing as potential clients, arrived at the Brighton 11th Street address of the suspect.

Taking notes on a legal pad, that man said he would represent the clients for a $10,000 retainer and $400 an hour. He handed over his business card; it read "Shlomo G. Dickerman, JD, LLM, Esq."


According to Sheepshead Bites, authorities raided the fake Dickerman's office earlier this week and none of the other lawyers there have been charged.

Prosecutors suspect, based on the driver's license found on the suspect when he was arrested by police, that the man might be Stephen H. Dickerman, who "appears to be a disbarred attorney with a criminal history," Nguyen said. Stephen H. Dickerman has been convicted twice of grand larceny and spent three years in prison. The prosecution is awaiting results from a fingerprint analysis.

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york...ity-profession-court-papers-article-1.1894902

Once your making that lawyer money I'd imagine it would be hard to flip burgers after that
 
Woman Keeps Getting Arrested For Trying to Sneak Onto Flights

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Marilyn Hartman, described by authorities as a "serial stowaway," was arrested by police at Los Angeles International Airport for the second time this week after allegedly trying to sneak onto a flight. Hartman has been arrested by police seven times this year for making similar attempts at SFO.

Hartman, 62, had been arrested by police Wednesday at LAX for trying to hop a free flight, and was given a court order to stay away from airport. According to the San Jose Mercury News, Hartman was released from jail Wednesday after pleading no contest to a misdemeanor trespassing charge.

"It was stupid, and it is something that I don't want to repeat," Hartman told the Press Democrat as she left court yesterday. She also the paper that she is homeless, and feels safer in airports than she does on the streets.

This past Monday, Hartman successfully—after three attempts—bypassed security at San Jose International Airport and boarded a Los Angeles-bound Southwest Airlines flight by pretending to be with a family, the Associated Press reports.

"I've been in some pretty awful situations so I took desperate measures," she told reporters Wednesday.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/travel/news/2014/08/07/homeless-woman-stowaway-los-angeles/13736983/

I can understand feeling safer in airports but whats the deal with sneaking onto planes? I can't imagine being homeless in one place is that much better than another
 
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