Stupid People Doing Stupid Things Thread - Part 2

[CaptainWagner]

I've had several teachers like that, though niether of them ever said anything quite to that level.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

He called one kid Shrek haha some of these kids are going to have to go see a therapist after this guy haha

 

[XtremelyBaneful]

 

[Monsieur Xavier]

8-Year-Old Calls Out "S***hole" Editor for Cutting Cartoons from Paper


http://www.heraldtimesonline.com/fr...cle_4640b010-c0f3-11e4-a778-c3ad6eaa038c.html


You can listen to the hilarious voicemail at the link. That is some quality parenting right there

A 8 y/o using such language and attitude is sad. As you said DJ, quality parenting.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Police Find First Thing You'd Expect in Container Marked "Not Weed"

After you go to the trouble of labeling a container "not weed," there's almost no wrong way to use it. You could fill it with loose change, monkey teeth—even heroin! In fact, there's only one thing that doesn't belong in a "not weed" container, which is reportedly just what a Nebraska man had in his on Saturday.

After arresting 21-year-old Jordan Meier for suspected DUI, police say they found the purportedly drug-free container seen above. Possessing a keener law enforcement instinct than you or I, officers looked in the container anyway, finding, yes, weed. Via The Smoking Gun:

[D]uring an inventory search of the vehicle, a 16 oz plastic Land O Lakes sour cream container labeled 'Not Weed' was found under the passenger seat containing 11.4g of marijuana. Jordan claimed ownership of the marijuana and was cited and released for the possession of marijuana less than one ounce.​

Asked why he so brazenly mislabeled the container, Meier told The Smoking Gun, "I don't know… I thought I was being funny. Inside joke with myself, I suppose."

http://journalstar.com/news/local/9...cle_72366ab9-766b-5964-b482-4773ecdc5062.html

Some brilliant police work right there, kudos gentleman

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Ben Carson: Prison Proves Being Gay Is "Absolutely" A Choice

http://forums.superherohype.com/showpost.php?p=30810339&postcount=459

I loathe that idiot

 

[Victarion]

I think people whining about the body types on cartoon characters are stupid. Any parent could just sit their kid down and point out the difference between fiction and reality, wouldn't you think?

 

[KevanG]

Ben Carson: Prison Proves Being Gay Is "Absolutely" A Choice

http://forums.superherohype.com/showpost.php?p=30810339&postcount=459

I loathe that idiot

Because everyone knows Oz was a reality TV show.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Man Taunts Cops on Facebook. Man Is Arrested. Man Cries.

Andrew Dale Marcum was featured on the Butler County Sheriff's Office Facebook as wanted for multiple charges. Marcum, an unwise man, commented, "I ain't tripping half of them don't even know me." No one knows what he meant.

But what Marcum's comment did do, the Cincinnati Enquirer reports, is send tipsters in droves to the police to narc on his whereabouts. Butler County Sheriff Richard Jones also trolled back on Twitter.

@butlersheriff tweeted "Hey Andrew Marcum we've got your room ready"

Less than 24 hours after the Facebook post, Marcum, 21, turned himself in to police, and apparently cried while standing for his mugshot. He was wanted for assault, abduction, domestic violence, and safe cracking.

http://www.cincinnati.com/story/new...er-co-defending-himself-on-facebook/24297941/

That is too damn funny, what a punk

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

League of Legends Fan Tries to Bring Five-Inch Spiked Blade on Plane

The latest entry in the Transportation Security Authority's Instagram catalog of heavy artillery: the five-inch, eight-spiked death blade above, which some hapless traveler tried to bring onto a flight from Baltimore-Washington International Airport. But worry not: it was only his trusty spinning axe, straight out of League of Legends.

TSA posted the photo yesterday along with the following caption:

#TSAGoodCatch - We don't actually know what this is, but it was discovered in a carry-on bag at the #Baltimore – #Washington (#BWI) International Thurgood Marshall Airport. Any ideas?​

Gamers quickly obliged. Some representative Instagram comments: "LMAO DRAVENS AXE HAHAHA," "ROFL NICE CATCH TSA," "LMAOOOO DRAVEN," "DRAAAVEN LMAO," "DRAAAAAAAAVEN," "DRRRAAAVVVEEENNNNNNN," "DRAAAAAAAAVVVVVEEEEENNNNNNN."

Draven, I learned after googling, is the name of a character in the computer game League of Legends, who is also known as "The Glorious Executioner." Judging by the little ring at the top, the TSA's booty is probably a replica keychain. Still, that thing looks dangerous. How are you supposed to hold it without poking your hand?

https://instagram.com/p/zyUJ5_l9_S

What world does that guy live in where you could bring something like that on a plane?

 

[Hobgoblin]

I guess that Ted Nugent story is fake, guys. Probably the Robertson one, too.


Sorry.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Frostbitten Frat Pledge May Lose Four Fingers After Idiotic Hazing Stunt

Fraternity pledges are often asked to give up everything for the sake of the brotherhood during initiation. At Syracuse University, that includes appendages. One Nu Alpha Phi pledge is currently in the hospital with frostbite, preparing to lose four of his fingers, because his bros allegedly made him do push-ups in the snow without gloves.

The Syracuse Post-Standard reports that two Nu Alpha Phi brothers were picked up by police yesterday and charged with misdemeanor first-degree hazing for forcing three pledges to do push-ups, sit-ups, and crawling exercises for 30 minutes in the snow without gloves. The brothers were reportedly punishing the pledges for "not doing their chores properly." Per the Post-Standard:

The victim said he went home [after the exercises] and ran his hands under warm water, but they still hurt. He went to Crouse Hospital the next day when the pain didn't stop. He was told he has severe frostbite and could lose four fingers—his ring and pinkie fingers on both hands.​

Police say the two pledges who did not incur frostbite "refused to cooperate with the investigation." Clearly, the warmth of lifelong friendship sustains them.

http://www.syracuse.com/crime/index...ternity_hazing_three_pledging_members_of.html

I'll never understand why people would want to join these dumb ass frats

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Couple Caught on Camera Banging in Sex Museum's Fifty Shades Exhibit

A couple hid out inside Las Vegas's Erotic Heritage Museum until after closing on Valentine's Day and, once all the employees had left, proceeded to have sex in every room they could. The best part is that the museum was featuring a tribute to kink and Fifty Shades of Grey at the time.

No, the best part is that they were caught on surveillance video, which was later obtained by TMZ.

Actually, the best part is that security staff saw the couple on the video feed and called staff members, who came back and chased the couple out of the museum. They exited through a back door.

The best part is all of it, really.

http://www.tmz.com/2015/03/04/las-vegas-erotic-museum-sex-surveillance-camera-50-shades-of-grey/

That is funny

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

McDonald's Has "No Budget" to Pay Artists at SXSW Showcase

SXSW, Austin's annual sticky-floored music industry sport coat and jeans cocaine marathon, wherein bands willingly exhaust themselves playing garbage sets for little or no money, deriving sustenance from tacos and the hope of "exposure," features a McDonald's showcase this year. And, no doy, they aren't paying.

This isn't the first year SXSW has played host to a corporation you regularly see advertising during the Super Bowl. Last year, for example, there was a Doritos thing that featured Lady Gaga. However, Doritos paid Lady Gaga $2.5 million dollars for that thing. What of the future Lady Gagas (music industry compliment) McDonald's is courting to perform at their 2015 showcase? The $90 billion corporation, powered by poverty-stricken workers, does not—hmm, let's see, ahhh, maybe if we...ah nope, sorry—have a budget, unfortunately.

Brian Harding of the band Ex Cops wrote about the company's pitch in a post on Facebook:

Their selling point was that this was "a great opportunity for additional exposure," and that "McDonald's will have their global digital team on site to meet with the bands, help with cross promotion, etc"

I don't, and doubt that they know what this means either.

Getting past that rhetoric, at the very least a big corporation like McDonald's can at least pay their talent a little. Right?

"There isn't a budget for an artist fee (unfortunately)"​

Unfortunate! Perhaps the budget was blown exchanging McNuggets for hugs or offering "free food to all audience members" of the showcase, a fact included in the pitch. Harding goes on to note that McDonald's promises the bands will "be featured on screens throughout the event, as well as POSSIBLY mentioned on McDonald's social media accounts like Facebook (57MM likes!)" Neat, and also exciting.

Of course, if you are a band, you are free to turn down such a showcase. Similarly, and less complicatedly, if you are McDonald's, you are free to freaking pay people.

https://www.facebook.com/excopsband/posts/892840547444887:0

Mickey D's is always a class act

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Local FOX Reporter's Home Invasion Story Got More Dramatic Over Time

A new report in the Washington Post indicates that a well-known gun proponent and local DC FOX reporter lied about a home invasion that ended in a face-off with 15 supposed drug addicts.

Emily Miller, a reporter for WTTG-TV, likes to tell the story of the 2010 New Year's Day home invasion that led her to purchase a gun for the first time. As the Post points out, it's been immortalized on paper, in her book, "Emily Gets Her Gun . . . But Obama Wants to Take Yours," and on film, in a dramatic reenactment produced by the NRA:

[YT]1tb_FbVYmnU[/YT]

The story she tells is terrifying—she says she came home to discover a man inside her home and followed him outside where 15 other men started running at her.

"It was the first time in my life I thought, I just wish I had a gun by my night table. Then I could defend myself if those men come in," she'd later tell the NRA.

But the official police report is much more mundane, the Post reports. Back when she reported it, she apparently told police she saw a guy by the side of the house and got a business card from him before he left.

"[Miller] stated that she left out to walk the dog at 1515hrs and when she returned at 1525hrs she observed [the suspect] exiting from behind the fence which leads to the side of the house. [Miller] asked [suspect] 'What are you doing here' and [suspect] stated 'I am delivering firewood,'" according to a supplemental D.C. police report.

[Miller] stated that she went into the house and felt that something was not right, so she exited the house to take a photo of [suspect's] vehicle. [Suspect] approached [Miller] and gave her a business card that stated [a tree service] and [suspect] left the scene. [Miller] stated that [suspect] was operating a silver pick up truck with landscaping on the side of it.​

Miller's parlayed the story into a successful speaking tour—the Post notes she's appeared at several guns rights conferences—and published a book based on her popular Washington Times series about getting her gun license.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs...doubt-on-home-invasion-of-local-fox-reporter/

Gee, a FOX reporter that is full of s***. Who would have ever thought such a thing could happen? And everyone watch out, Obama wants your guns! He actually hasn't done anything to support that theory but don't let that fool you! He is def coming for your guns so stock up now before he instates martial law!!!!

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Man Who Burned Face Praying Over Sizzling Fajitas Can't Sue Applebee's

On Wednesday, an appellate court ruled that a man who burned his face while praying over a plate of fajitas could not sue the New Jersey Applebee's where the face-burning reportedly took place.
The Courier-Post reports that Hiram Jimenez seared his face at the Westampton, N.J., chain restaurant in March 2010 after he bowed his head over the table—on which a plate of hot meat had just been placed—to pray. According to court documents, Jimenez heard "a loud sizzling noise, followed by 'a pop noise' and then felt a burning sensation in his left eye and on his face."

Jimenez claimed he suffered "serious and permanent" injuries "solely as a result of (Applebee's) negligence when he came in contact with a dangerous and hazardous condition, specifically, 'a plate of hot food'."

A trial judge disagreed, as did a two-judge panel who heard Jimenez's appeal of the initial ruling.

The restaurant, the ruling stated, did not need to warn Jimenez "against a danger that is open and obvious."

"A danger that is open and obvious" is a good way to describe most food at Applebee's. Be careful praying there.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/...urned-by-fajitas-cant-sue-applebees/24403053/

If this were still the 90's he probably would have won

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Local Newscaster Wants to Know if Waluigi Is Behind Crash Landing

Local news has been speaking "truth to power" since the invention of towns, and there's no better example of why we need regional newscasters than today's LaGuardia plane accident. It's unclear if a fictional villain from the Mario franchise is responsible, but watchdogs at Atlanta's CBS 46 are on it.

Whenever a semi filled with bees flips over, a school explodes, or some dumbass falls into a burning fireworks factory, local rubberneckers immediately upload photos to Twitter. Then, triggered by infinitesimal vibrations in the air, local news station staffers swarm this onlooker and/or victim to request permission to use their blurry image, which then gets used regardless. Local Twitter guy @Leyawn decided to test just how credulous these people are. Would a guy who claims to have been on the crashed plane by using someone else's photo from the scene with a superimposed Nintendo character be taken seriously? It's worth a shot:

The answer is yes! Nice. I guess this is what happens when all of the staff photographers have been laid off.

http://gawker.com/local-newscaster-wants-to-know-if-waluigi-is-behind-cra-1689689831

Man reporters have been looking stupid lately

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

A Bogus Concert Promoter Reportedly Scheduled an Entire Fake Drake Tour

Fans have already bought tickets for a Drake show in Houston that's never going to happen, ABC13 reports. Drizzy was billed as performing at the Arena Theatre May 13, but it turns out the show isn't legit, and the venue—and a handful of others around the U.S.—may have been scammed by a fake promoter pushing a fake tour.

The Arena is offering refunds to fans who shelled out for pre-sale tickets, and Drake's spokesperson is asking anyone who fell for the scam to let the authorities know:

"Drake has never been scheduled to appear at the Arena Theatre venue. When we learned of this situation we immediately encouraged the venue and promoter to contact law enforcement to initiate an investigation. We are horrified that someone would use Drake's name to take advantage of his fans. For any individuals who may have fallen victim to this, please contact your local authorities."​

The venue says it's working with Drake's people at OVO Sound to try to get a legitimate concert on the calendar, and people who purchase the pre-sale tickets for the fake show will get first priority. (People who bought the tickets secondhand on Craigslist might just be out of luck.)

According to Gossip Cop, "an unidentified phony promotion company" has also tricked venues and fans in seven other cities, including Miami.

Back in 2010, the Miami New Times reported that people posing as members of Drake's team and booking fake shows was already "a trend."

Here's the statement Drake's people put out at the time:

It has come to light that an individual or groups of individuals have been contracting and advertising false bookings of Aspire/Cash Money/Young Money recording artist Drake for financial gain. These individuals misrepresent themselves as management affiliates of Drake in order to secure and pocket deposits for false bookings and club appearances.​

No word on who the scammers are, or whether the 2010 incidents are related to the game being run this year.

In the meantime, be aware that the only real shows currently on Drake's schedule are either at music festivals or outside the U.S.

http://abc13.com/entertainment/drake-fans-to-get-refunds-amid-houston-concert-confusion/544440/

Well it's their own damn fault for having horrible taste in music and actually being willing to pay to see that hack

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Man Brings Dead Body to Lawyer's Office, "Didn't Know Who Else to Trust"

A Florida man who confessed to shooting and killing his neighbor after an alleged struggle brought the dead man's body to his lawyer's office in his pickup truck Wednesday. According to the Fort Myers News-Press, the man "didn't know who else to trust."

John Marshall, 52, reportedly showed up bleeding with broken thumbs and teeth, and told his attorney, Robert Harris, that he had acted in self-defense. He said he'd wrestled a gun away from his neighbor during a scuffle.

Marshall and his late neighbor, later identified as Ted Hubbell, had apparently argued about "some property work" days earlier. Marshall called his attorney, saying he thought his life was in danger.

Harris said he advised Marshall to get a restraining order.

After spending all of Wednesday in the lawyer's office, Marshall left for the hospital around 10 p.m, the News-Press reported. The Lee County Sheriff's Office hasn't said whether he'll be arrested.

Harris told the paper that although bringing a dead body into the office was certainly unusual, it wasn't the worst thing his client could have done.

"They don't teach you about this in law school. That's for sure," he said. "I believe we've handled ourselves correctly, but I'm a little in shock myself. This is not something that happens every day."

Neighbors later told the News-Press that they knew Hubbell as a Buddhist pacifist who was never loud or aggressive, while Marshall was "very threatening and aggressive." The two were apparently in a dispute about a portable outhouse that Marshall had set up near Hubbell's property.

http://www.news-press.com/story/news/crime/2015/03/04/police-fort-myers-bokeelia-law-firm/24398177/

Sounds like he thought his lawyer was Saul Goodman

 

[TheDreamMaster]

Scottish Teacher Fired For Telling Kid, "Shut Up, I Shagged Your Maw"

http://news.stv.tv/west-central/312...il-i-shagged-your-maw-is-struck-off-register/

That is awesomely hilarious. We sure could use a few teachers like that for some of these smart mouthed brats here in the states

Most of it is funny, but come on, unless the kid was really awful I don't see the hilarity in just randomly making fun of the fat kid.

 

[XtremelyBaneful]

jihadi john. enough said.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Woman Busted Running Online Sex Shows Out of Canadian Library

For the second time this year, a young woman is in trouble for being naked in a library in exchange for money.

According to an Ottawa Sun report, a 21-year-old woman from Ontario—known only by her webcam handle Lilsecrett—just turned herself into local police:

She turned herself in Friday morning and was released with a promise to appear, police said.

Investigators said they received information about the identity of the suspect on Thursday and attempted to locate her.​

Not only is she facing criminal charges of an "indecent act" in public, she's been booted from MyFreeCams.com, the company that hosted her paid routines. So, now she's in trouble with the law and out of a well-paying job, so that's great. But in the defense of the law, it probably wasn't great to be *********ing on a webcam with little kids walking around behind you:

http://www.ottawasun.com/2015/03/06/woman-21-charged-for-windsor-ont-library-sex-show-police

That is so incredibly stupid

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

"Cute Mugshot Girl" Got Arrested Again—Here's Her New Mugshot

Remember the attractive teen who got arrested last November for allegedly dealing prescription drugs? (F*** what you heard: her mugshot was cute.) Well, "mugshot dime" Alysa Bathrick was picked up for a second time last week.

Bathrick, 18, was charged Friday with shoplifting in Raleigh, N.C., ABC 11 reports. The alleged theft occurred January 26. Her new mugshot, above, is still cute, and conveys the same insouciant charm and don't-give-a-**** eyebrow game as her previous work.

Cute Mugshot Girl was cocky about her last arrest, tweeting her own booking photo and telling people on Twitter she'd been busted for "Xanax, homie." This time, Bathrick hasn't said anything about her arrest online.

http://abc11.com/society/cute-mugshot-girl-arrested-again/540876/

Ya she is cute now but lets see what she looks like in 10 years if she keeps partying

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Will.i.am Really Wants You to Stop and Think Before You 3D-Print a Human

In an interview with Dezeen, perhaps that best interview that I have ever read, Will.i.am boldly pushes a new agenda calling for new laws to stop an uprising of 3D printing humans from sowing the seeds of our society's moral collapse.

Yes, Will.i.am—pop star, once and future hologram, Intel employee, hyperlink pioneer, purveyor of terrible wearables, Chief Creative Officer of a 3D printing company—is now also Bombastic Soothsayer of the Coming 3D-Printed-Human Anarchy:

"Eventually 3D printing will print people," said Will.i.am. "I'm not saying I agree with it, I'm just saying what's fact based on plausible growth in technology."​

He's not saying he agrees with it. Smart move. Best not to agree with a hypothetical artificial human production scheme. At least until the details emerge. He did not, however, reveal the Lesser Peas' opinions on the matter, leaving us woefully uninformed about whether apl.de.ap maybe yearns for an uprising of 3D printed life forms, or whether Fergie would support 3D printing a version of herself that doesn't pee its pants.

I.am says he expects this to happen "in our lifetime."

Will.i.am is currently 39 years young, so even if he lives to 119 years old, this means he anticipates this development within 80 years. This is an impressively optimistic estimate of the time-frame in which 3D printers will progress enough to conjure human life wholesale and upset the delicate balance between man, Gods, and i.ams:

"If you can print a liver or a kidney, god dang it, you're going to be able to print a whole freaking person," said Will.i.am. "Now we're getting into a whole new territory. Moses comes down with the 10 commandments and says 'Thou shalt not...'. He didn't say **** about 3D printing."

"When you have god-like tools, who's governing me? I don't know. I could create life. So new codes and morals – beyond laws – something has to be instilled into us. Before, when it was time to reproduce you had to mate. But now..."​

Will.i.am is 100% correct that Moses did not say mention anything on the record about 3D printing. And his musings on the ultimate governability of man are trenchant.

But then there's this, where he outlines a path of logic about the enormous potential of 3D printers and how they willaccomplish feats on technology that, as of yet, no 3D printers nor any other technology can do:

"You're starting with beef, and leathers, and body parts. Eventually it will get more complex. It's basically beam-me-up Scotty, a 3D printer that disintegrates the source. Star Trek is pretty cool, because they had things like iPhones, and the internet. They also had 3D printers, that was beam-me-up Scotty. Teleportation."​

Just to summarize: Will.i.am has Will.i.asserted that 3D printers could one day (within the next 80 years) create human life, serve as conduits for teleportation, AND operate as a catalyst for the disintegration of society's implicit and explicit legal and moral regulations. Boom boom pow!

This is Jaden-and-Willow levels of cosmically, gloriously wacky, so much so that I'd assume that Will.i.am contacted the youngest Smith offspring, if it was not for my lingering suspicion that Will.i.am greatly begrudges Will Smith for cornering the phrase "Willennium."

http://www.dezeen.com/2015/03/06/will-i-am-interview-future-3d-printing-people/

What a moron

 

[Marvolo]

"Cute Mugshot Girl" Got Arrested Again—Here's Her New Mugshot

http://abc11.com/society/cute-mugshot-girl-arrested-again/540876/

Ya she is cute now but lets see what she looks like in 10 years if she keeps partying

Hmm I've been wanting to take another trip to Raleigh. t: