The Official Chuck Norris Thread

[Spidey-Bat]

RIGHT NOW, Chuck Norris is killing EVERYTHING, because HE CAN.

I hope Uwe Boll is one of them.

 

[TheSumOfGod]

I hope Uwe Boll is one of them.

Uwe Boll and Chuck Norris are completely unaware of each other's existence, simply because their respective vibrationnal frequencies are too different. Once Chuck Norris literally WALKED THROUGH Uwe Boll, and neither of them noticed.

 

[TheSumOfGod]

Chuck Norris needs a power sander to shave. He sometimes uses 2 or 3 in a row.

 

[Iceman]

Chuck Norris also developed the art of acting - (he was in Dodgeball)

 

[Majin Boo]

 

[The Comedian]

http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?t=214283

 

[BAH HUMBBUG!]

Best Thing Ever


http://www.razoric.com/games/Chuck-Norris-Walker-Brokeback-Ranger

 

[BAH HUMBBUG!]

Bump, because if I don't Chuck Norris will kill me....

 

[Immortalfire]

Chuck Norris is who Dennis Green thought he was.

Chuck Norris can talk about Fight Club.

 

[wiegeabo]

God, I forgot all about this thread.


Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris is not immortal. Death's just too damn scared to ever come for him.

 

[Immortalfire]

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

When Freddy Krueger dreams, he is attacked by Chuck Norris.

Speaking of which, Wes Craven's next project is titled "A Real Nightmare On Elm Street: Don't F**k With Chuck"

 

[3dman27]

God, I forgot all about this thread.


Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris is not immortal. Death's just too damn scared to ever come for him.

LOL

 

[BAH HUMBBUG!]

"Chuck Norris doesn't sleep....he waits"

 

[BAH HUMBBUG!]

"When Bruce Banner gets angry he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets angry he turns into Chuck Norris."

 

[BAH HUMBBUG!]

"There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist."


"Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill."

 

[YsoSerious]

makes me want to pull my walker texas ranger lever

 

[3dman27]

if chuck norris had been in the marvel universe the SHRA would never had been considered one glare from chuck would' shut 'em up

 

[BAH HUMBBUG!]

Fact # 143....Chuck will **** you up

 

[Poeman]

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/page1.html

Some of my favorites

The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was an exhibition game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.

Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.

Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

 

[Hotwire]

My favorite is still...

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

 

[Majic Walrus]

Chuck Norris wants this thread to die.