The Official Superman Reboot Caption Thread - Part 2

[KalMart]

"Heelloooo Eaarrtthhhhh....!!!!"

 

[Dark Sentinel]

SUPES: Rule number one for picking up chicks, fellas. Get a cape. Chicks love capes.

 

[KalMart]

Good thing no-one's around...they might think the 'S' stands for 'stack of dimes'. **** it's cold up here...!

 

[KalMart]

: So are you going to talk or what?

: I don't have to tell you anything...and you've got nothing on me, so...

: Right....could you excuse me for a sec...?

: You were saying?

: ...crap....

 

[super-t]

Batman- Who are you? Why are you here?

(Superman looks away.)

Batman- Wh....Hey I'm talking to you.

Superman- Oh right im sorry you were saying?

Batman- Where do...

(Supes looks away again)

Batman- HEY!!!!

Superman- Sorry!! SOrry!

 

[Dark Sentinel]

: I'm here to deliver flying knuckle sammiches and chew bubblegum. And I'm all outta bubblegum.

 

[Man of Steel]

Batman- Who are you? Why are you here?

(Superman looks away.)

Batman- Wh....Hey I'm talking to you.

Superman- Oh right im sorry you were saying?

Batman- Where do...

(Supes looks away again)

Batman- HEY!!!!

Superman- Sorry!! SOrry!

t:

 

[John Locke]

Batman: So where were you doing the whole occupation of Gotham thing?

Superman: Oh I was working on an oil rig. Doing good work. I mean people need oil man.

Batman: Yeah but people were dying man.

Superman: Yeah sorry about that but hey I'm here now. You're here. Zod's trying to take over the world or something. How bout we show him who's the World's Finest?

Batman: You mean now? I can't. I got to fly to Paris. Gonna meet Selina in a cafe and make Alfred's day but some other time maybe.

Superman: Wow these really are horrible excuses.

Batman: Yeah but I mean are they any better than the one's Marvel's going come up with to explain why Hulk's not in any of the movies in between Avengers and Avengers 2?

Superman: Hulk sorry. Hulk passed out. Hulk got totally SMASHED the night before.

Batman: After credits scene of Avengers 2 would have to be Hulk's intervention.

Superman: Ah but we kid because we love.

Batman: I mean if anything the Avengers introduced us to Shawarma.

Superman: I wonder if they bought any Shawarma shops before the movie because they knew sales would spike. I was thinking about buying a lot of chalupas stands and name dropping it in this movie.

Batman: Dude don't. Before Begins I bought so many Falafel stands. It didn't work out well. Now it's just a joke. I mean I've got some many employees begging me to switch them to something else because there's no money in Falafel. Then they try to play with my emotions by saying they got kids to feed.

Superman: They don't like Falafel?

Batman: I know right? That's what I said!

 

[KalMart]

Lois: What's with the 'S'...?

Supes: On my planet, it stands for hope.

Lois: Weelllll on Earth it's an 'S'. How about........

Lois: ........ssss-SOAP...?

Supes: .....excuse me...?

 

[The Sage]

 

[djprince]

 

[KalMart]

: ....but those birthday partys....all those kids wanting pictures and stuff...gotta be the worst...

: I hear ya'.....

 

[djprince]

Superman : "Dibs!"
Batman : "Damn!"

 

[dnno1]

Superman: "Were you ever in the film, "Twilight"."
Lois: "No, why?"
Superman: "I don't see your reflection in the mirror."

 

[Manosman]

That's amazing! I just had that moment when I saw this

 

[Panthro]

Great stuff guys

 

[Rodrigo90]

Superman: Somebody stole my powers. We have to get them back as soon as possible. I can't imagine what terrible things will happen.

Batman: Who did?

Superman: A man so terrible. ..God knows what evil things he's doing with them..

Spoiler

 

[KalMart]

Voice Of Tim Roth On The Other Side Of The Room: Okay everybody freeze, this is a robbery...!!!

Supes: .....are you kidding me...?

Batman: No-no, let him come....I need this.

 

[Jack Bauer]

BATMAN: You took longer then expected, Clark. This isn't like you.

SUPERMAN: Yeah, sorry. When I got the call from you, I spotted a blue Police Box and-

(BATMAN just stares at him.)

SUPERMAN: Damn it.

 

[moviefreak]

Former Barbra Streisand hairstylist, Jon Peters after the abortion of Superman Lives, looking glum...

Nearly two days ago...
"I don’t want to see him in that suit. It’s too faggy." "Ah hell!"
"No flying." "Oh Sheeeet!!!!"

"He has to fight a giant spider in the third act." "It's in, yippeeee!"

 

[Micromind]

"With or without you .."

 

[Micromind]

"Borrn in the USA.."

 

[elgaz]

Batman : "I called you here because we need to talk. The Earth is in peril. People's lives are in danger. Humanity is losing hope. And there's not long left before we reach the point of no return. I've done all I can, but I'm only a man. We need you."

Superman : "I knew this day would come. My father told me that I was here for a reason; that I had a purpose, a destiny. And now............. it's time to fulfill that destiny."

Batman : "We're agreed then. The Justice League will stand shoulder-to-shoulder with you . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Bieber must be stopped, at any cost."

 

[KalMart]

"Borrn in the USA.."

I was trying to think of something for that...that's a good one.

"............sssssSSSHHHHHPROCKKEETTTTTTSSSSS....!!!"

 

[elgaz]

Superman : "So ....uh ............. how's tricks?"
Batman : *stares*
Superman : "Weather's nice, huh?"
Batman : *stares*
Superman : "You don't talk much, do you?"
Batman : *stares*
Superman : ".................... ever seen a grown man naked?"