Knightsaber Priss
Lone Wolf
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2002
- Messages
- 28,125
- Reaction score
- 5
- Points
- 31
I've been pretty much wound up and high strung a lot recently and I think I've figured out the reason why. Quite simply...my family is driving me insane. I think I really need a very long vacation away from them with people that share my own interests because they just take me for granted way too much. And when I refuse a request of theirs I feel guilt ridden because, well, they're my family and I feel bad when I can't make them happy. The most recent psychological lashing I gave myself was because I had to tell my parents I couldn't babysit my nephew, the reason being that I had to work that night. I just cannot stay up all day and then stay up all night anymore. As it stands right now I'm tired and should be in bed since I work again tonight but here I am typing away on my keyboard to all of you about my problems. (Damn you Hype.) But seriously I did feel a bit guilty and angry yesterday, illogically angry at myself in fact, which thanks to an old Metallica CD I've been able to get over my self pitying funk. But still, that doesn't negate the fact that I only really get calls from family members when they want me to do something for them. It's seriously starting to upset me that I'm nothing more than a service to them. No "Hi, how are you doing?" type calls, no social visits, nothing. It's like I have an incurable disease or something. The last social call I had was from my youngest sister who proceeded to ignore me for most of the non-conversation and whenever I'd ask her things about what was going on absolute silence or a reply seconds after I'd repeated what I'd said to her earlier several times. I don't even want to get started on my younger sister who's 3 years younger than I am. I already posted a thread about her. I really helped her out of a bad situation with her now ex-husband and how does she repay me? Not even a hug and a hank you but by sending me a nasty reply about my forthright email concerning my niece's neglect. It's always about "her plans" and never a thought on whether I have plans of my own. I've had to ditch too many plans because she needed a babysitter. I'm trying to figure out what to do, but the only thing that comes to my mind is putting in an ad to find myself a new family. Well, I know why the younger sister might not want me around because I don't fold when she puts on her diva act, but why is it I am always the one that has to initiate social time with my parents and siblings? Am I really that horrible of a person that they can't bear to be in my company?
Last edited: