Corrupt A Wish

[BlueLightning]

You will have a fun night, but when it ends you will become so depressed that you will try to make that night happen again. So you try to re-enact every action that led to have that fun night. In doing so you become obsessed with the details, every time trying to get right everything. You reprogram clocks, reaccomodate calendars, and in the end you try to convince every person you had an interaction that day to act the same way they did before that night (you even write scripts for them). Your friends and family become worried about you, so they intern you in an Asylum. You get trapped inside your imagination, remembering in your mind that fun night with a smile on your face, forgetting time and space, being happy with your memories forever.

I wish I could be more organized.

 

[Anubis]

Aliens take over the planet and you're sent to a Work Camp, where your life is now organized for you, in the form of grueling back breaking work in the salt mines.

I wish I could think of a good wish.

 

[Sensi]

You will think of a good wish but you would have made it for me.

I wish I was in a nice warm bath.

 

[Anubis]

Done, but you have to take it with this guy.

I wish for 3 incorruptible wishes.

 

[Bruce Banner]

You will get 3 incorruptible wishes...out of 10. Those 3 wishes will be after 7 horrifically corrupted ones.


I wish I was not burning out with college.

 

[Sensi]

You won't be after you discover a pretty young lady cares for you deeply but then she has to leave and you are left with a choice of which you love the most school or the girl.

I wish I could be magically ready for this weekend.

 

[Bruce Banner]

^yikes that was mean


You will be ready for the weekend. The price you pay is that you are never prepared for anything again after that.


I wish that I had a loft in New York City

 

[lou2099]

Granted. But it is not rent free, and you know how much rent is in NYC.

I wish Bret Favre would retire for good.

 

[Sensi]

He will and he will move in with you so you can take care of him after he loses all his money.

I wish Hugh Grant would make another movie.

 

[Anubis]

He does , but it's a sex tape with a transvestite hooker named Bubbles.


I wish I could do whatever I wanted without any consequences for me or my family & friends.

 

[Bruce Banner]

You will, your family and friends will be safe. Eventually your family and friends are going to do stuff to you. You will try and get back at them but you remembered whatever you do will have no consequence you, family or friends and you'll do this


I wish I had a muse

 

[Anubis]

Granted. But all it does is inspire you to write How I Met your Mother Slash Fiction.



I wish for a Zombie Invasion

 

[SuperFerret]

I wish for a Zombie Invasion

You're living in one. Welcome to Romero's Consumer Zombie Apocalypse.


I wish I wasn't so spiritually lost.

 

[Bruce Banner]

I wish I wasn't so spiritually lost.

^
Same for me actually


Anyway you will not be spiritually lost, the Westboro baptist church is gonna take you under their wing.

Spoiler

Hopefully you'll escape from there before you lose mental clarity as well

I wish that I could trust more people.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but they're totally gonna screw you over. You probably shouldn't have trusted them so much.


I wish I could get a redo on my life.

 

[SuperFerret]

You do, and you make worse mistakes the second time around.

I wish I had a photographic memory.

 

[Bruce Banner]

FOR ANUBIS, Ferret beat me today.

Your wish is granted you will get a redo on your life. You will also retain the memories of your old life. While trying to live the new one you constantly harp on things that made you want to redo all this in the first place. You have a mental breakdown, unable to enjoy your new life or comes to terms with your past. You drive head on into a semi while listening to Elton John's "Rocket Man"

For Ferret

You will have a photographic memory, but your memory will be wiped while your in a coma and all you will remember is the Two girls in a cup video.


I wish I knew the girls that had a crush on me when I didn't realise it.

 

[SuperFerret]

You'll know when they date rape you.

Also, I've never seen Two Girls, One Cup.

I wish I had a sandwich.

 

[Anubis]

Done. Do you like it? It was made by the girls from 2 Girls 1 Cup.



I wish I had never seen that Pain Olympics video.

 

[Bruce Banner]

Anubis you beat me

For Ferret
You will get a sandwich, and you find out it was made of Ferret. After you already digested it.



For Anubis
You didn't see the video, you got stuck watching a snuff film.



I wish that I could not be so cynical.

 

[SuperFerret]

You become such an optimist that someone kills you.

I wish I could think of an incorruptible wish.

 

[Bruce Banner]

You could think on a incorruptible wish. The very second before a wrecking ball goes flying through your house....taking you with it.



I wish to steal someones girlfriend

 

[Anubis]

Done, but you're arrested for kidnapping.


I wish I had a Wes Anderson Box sex with all his movies.

 

[Bruce Banner]

You do, but you look inside to find Richard Simmons workout videos


I wish that I didn't hate my hometown.

 

[Anubis]

Done, but you can never go back.


I wish I could teleport my bodily functions into the toilet.