The 'Make An Honest Confession' Thread! Part V: Rebirth

[Marx]

I confess that spending time with my best friend now feels like more of an obligation...than anything else.

 

[Kane52630]

I confess to buy it, use it, break it, fix it, trash it, change it, mail upgrade it, charge it, point it, zoom it, press it, snap it, work it, quick erase it.

 

[Manic]

I think there was a Busta Rhymes song that went like that.

 

[Immortalfire]

I confess that I like to move it, move it.

 

[Colossal Spoons]

I think there was a Busta Rhymes song that went like that.

Touch It

 

[Superman 1265]

Welcome to the party. I've been kissed only once on cheek, zero on lips.

I confess!!! I love women with red hair. Just ^_^ love.

Same here. The problem is that I'm autistic, and don't really have the best communication skills, girls just don't understand me.

 

[Secret Fawful]

My first kiss[es] was by quite a gorgeous girl I had only met just that day. I've never been kissed since. What...the.....hell?

 

[SpideyVille]

I've kissed a couple of girls on the cheek, but I've never been kissed on the lips, except for this one time where my friends held me down against my will after I refused to make out with some girl that spent most of her time drinking and doing drugs across the street while we were in school. Apparently a bunch of virgins thought it was more important that I got laid my senior year instead of they themselves.

 

[Charlie Boy]

I've kissed a couple of girls on the cheek, but I've never been kissed on the lips, except for this one time where my friends held me down against my will after I refused to make out with some girl that spent most of her time drinking and doing drugs across the street while we were in school. Apparently a bunch of virgins thought it was more important that I got laid my senior year instead of they themselves.

True friends right there.

 

[Superman 1265]

There was this time during my Sophmore year of High School that I actually had my first ever girlfriend. Once we started going out, she started to avoid me. I kept asking her what was wrong, but she kept side stepping my questions. This one morning she send me a text message that said "Don't kiss me". I sent her a text back, asking her why, and she replied with a text that said "because". I broke up with her not too long after that. I think it's pretty sad that my own girlfriend didn't want to kiss me or hang around with me.

 

[SpideyVille]

True friends right there.

I haven't spoken to them since.

There was this time during my Sophmore year of High School that I actually had my first ever girlfriend. Once we started going out, she started to avoid me. I kept asking her what was wrong, but she kept side stepping my questions. This one morning she send me a text message that said "Don't kiss me". I sent her a text back, asking her why, and she replied with a text that said "because". I broke up with her not too long after that. I think it's pretty sad that my own girlfriend didn't want to kiss me or hang around with me.

During my senior year, I was friends with some girl that was good friends with the cousin of a girl that I liked at the time. After that didn't work out, I was still friends with this girl and I started to like her a little and we got along great, but we were different in that she liked to go out to parties and get drunk, whereas I didn't and that was always the thing that kept me from even trying to hook up with her. But one night she messaged me on AIM asking me to be her boyfriend. I didn't know what to do, so I told her we haven't even dated so how could I be her boyfriend, and she told me it doesn't matter since I was now her boyfriend. I realized then, and maybe still til this day, that as much as I wanted a girlfriend, I was kinda scared of having one. So not knowing what to do, I ended up ignoring her the next day at school until I had a friend talk to her and she claimed that she was just kidding about the whole thing. We drifted apart after that and every now and think I think back to it and can't help but think what would've happened had I not been such a jerk to her that day.

 

[Charlie Boy]

I haven't spoken to them since.

How much action have you gotten since?

 

[Marx]

I confess that I like to move it, move it.

I confess that this makes me smile.

 

[bullets]

I'm a little surprised by all the "Haven't kissed a girl" stories. I confess that I'm going to hook up with my ex this weekend and there's a big part of me that doesn't want to..

 

[Superman 1265]

I haven't spoken to them since.
During my senior year, I was friends with some girl that was good friends with the cousin of a girl that I liked at the time. After that didn't work out, I was still friends with this girl and I started to like her a little and we got along great, but we were different in that she liked to go out to parties and get drunk, whereas I didn't and that was always the thing that kept me from even trying to hook up with her. But one night she messaged me on AIM asking me to be her boyfriend. I didn't know what to do, so I told her we haven't even dated so how could I be her boyfriend, and she told me it doesn't matter since I was now her boyfriend. I realized then, and maybe still til this day, that as much as I wanted a girlfriend, I was kinda scared of having one. So not knowing what to do, I ended up ignoring her the next day at school until I had a friend talk to her and she claimed that she was just kidding about the whole thing. We drifted apart after that and every now and think I think back to it and can't help but think what would've happened had I not been such a jerk to her that day.

I remember during my Freshman year, there was a girl named Simone who was in one of my classes. She was really cute and funny. This one day one of her friends told me that she liked me. Even though I liked her too, I still didn't know how to express it (yeah, I'm that pathetic). Before I could figure out what to say to her, she moved to another school.

 

[Marx]

I confess that I strongly believe some people need a good dose of reality to knock them off of their high horses.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

I've kissed a couple of girls on the cheek, but I've never been kissed on the lips, except for this one time where my friends held me down against my will after I refused to make out with some girl that spent most of her time drinking and doing drugs across the street while we were in school. Apparently a bunch of virgins thought it was more important that I got laid my senior year instead of they themselves.

And the problem was...?

 

[SpideyVille]

How much action have you gotten since?

None, but that's irrelevant!

That incident was just part of the reason why I stopped talking to them. I never felt any real respect from any of them because it was almost as if I had no say in anything. It was like they would decide what I should do and where I should go, and if I spoke out, I would get called a wuss and other things that sound similar. And usually when I did go along with what they wanted, I would end up in situations that didn't want to be in. Heck, they even had this one girl I liked that they were friends with think that I was stalking her because they would invite me to places where she was at. When I tried to explain things, she ended up cursing me out at school.

And the problem was...?

Well I always thought that if I was going to do something with anybody, i would at least like to be attracted to them. But for them, apparently it was more important for them to try to pay some girl out of nowhere to try to help me get laid. I know they were only trying to help, but then they went and humiliated me in front of my entire school by tackling me to the ground and making me do something against my will. It was definitely not my idea of how I want my first kiss to happen.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

Well I always thought that if I was going to do something with anybody, i would at least like to be attracted to them. But for them, apparently it was more important for them to try to pay some girl out of nowhere to try to help me get laid. I know they were only trying to help, but then they went and humiliated me in front of my entire school by tackling me to the ground and making me do something against my will. It was definitely not my idea of how I want my first kiss to happen.

Look man, life isn't like the movies. Think you need to get off your high-horse a bit, and realize that in their own twisted way your friends were trying to help you. Sometimes first kisses and first lays are sucky, forgettable affairs. But it's still important to go through them relatively early, so you don't develop intimacy issues with the opposite sex later on when it's important. The longer you wait for that first kiss, the more awkward and weird it will be for the other person when it finally happens (for instance if you reach your 20's and have still never been kissed it will be REALLY hard and embarrassing to explain that to your date). And that will be a real shame if you really like her.

 

[terry78]

In the train station I get off of downtown Chicago there's this stand that sells random Amish items that is run by two chicks that honestly aren't that bad looking, sans the goodwife getup they wear. I walk past them pretty much every day, but Friday I asked them in a jovial manner that we should go out sometime. Which illicted laughter from both of them basically. I'm sure hell is awaiting me for such bawdy nonsense.

 

[SpideyVille]

Look man, life isn't like the movies. Think you need to get off your high-horse a bit, and realize that in their own twisted way your friends were trying to help you. Sometimes first kisses and first lays are sucky, forgettable affairs. But it's still important to go through them relatively early, so you don't develop intimacy issues with the opposite sex later on when it's important. The longer you wait for that first kiss, the more awkward and weird it will be for the other person when it finally happens (for instance if you reach your 20's and have still never been kissed it will be REALLY hard and embarrassing to explain that to your date). And that will be a real shame if you really like her.

I don't think the case is really me being on a high horse when it comes to this particular incident. I mean, this was 4-5 years ago when I was much more young and naive, but I know now that the first time for anything is not going to memorable like they make it seem in movies. It's just that back then my thinking was, if this is going to happen, I don't want it to be this way, especially with someone who was "clean" for lack of a better word.

Like I said, I know that they were trying to help me, it's just that I feel like they crossed the bit because anyone who knows me knows that my breaking point is when someone tries to physically force me to do something I don't want to. They asked me and I was there when they made the suggestion to the girl, and I made it clear that I didn't want it to happen that way. But they didn't seem to get the message and thought it would be funny to take things a step further.

But I get what you're saying and I understand that it will get harder as I get older. I've actually had more female friends in the past couple of years, and the ones that I've opened up to more and shared such information with usually react positively my lack of experience to the point where I'm not really afraid or ashamed to admit it. But instead, now I find myself trying to convince myself mentally that I'm ready to go to a more physically level because that has been the cause of my more recent downfalls.

 

[Scourge2099]

I confess my life really sucks right now.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

SpideyVille, my suggestion would be to ask one of your female friends that you talk to, to set you up with one of her friends. There's that, or you could just get an escort, but I'm assuming you wouldn't be into that. I think maybe you're paralyzed with worries about failure (conversationally, kissing, sexually), and maybe the first couple times you make a serious effort you might fail. But you have to get out there and keep trying. That's the only way you'll overcome your fears. I'm not going to sugarcoat your situation, because if you're 22 or 23 and have never been kissed that goes well beyond being a late-bloomer and into something that could seriously damage your quality of life unless you take concrete steps to fix it soon.

 

[SpideyVille]

Yeah, I feel like I'm at a weird stage in my life. About a year ago I had an experience with a girl where I was really sure she liked me, yet somehow things fell apart and I put a lot of blame on myself to the point where I started looking at myself and realized that I had some issues that need to be worked out or else every kind of relationship I try to have will fall apart. I've spent the past year trying to fix them, while also pushing people away in my own anger and bitterness.

But it's like I'm at a point where I want to move forward but haven't had as much motivation as I've had in the past to get things done. And as far as relationships are concerned, I feel like I've learned from my mistakes and I've learned more about what it takes to be in a relationship, but I don't feel like I'd be able to make a relationship last for a long time, and that has seemed to be the main thing that has prevented me from even trying, whereas I was much more fearless in the past. But I guess my focus back then was just on getting a girl, while now I start to worry about how to keep a girl if I were to even get one.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

You're thinking too much. Girls sense insecurity and self-doubt. Right now you should just be focused on first impressions. Save all the "how to keep her" stuff for after you've been on a couple dates and kissed her. The last thing you want to do is scare her off by asking her too many questions about your relationship or her feelings about you.

Look up dating do's and don'ts online.

It might not be my place to say, but it might also help to get some professional counselling. Just to talk through some of your intimacy issues.

Anyway, good luck. It seems scary now, but if you go through with it, one day you'll wonder what the big deal was.