waited until the DVD release because the trailers didn't do much for me. I'm a big fan of GI Joe going back to my childhood years with Marvel and I even read the new IDW series. This movie..... wow! I guess anyone can make a film in Hollywood. I have never been someone who disses a movie for altering the original book or comic concept because it works better on film, but EVERYTHING changed in this film was for the worse.
I was skeptical going into this when I saw it at the theater. What I can say is that I've never seen a movie quite like that. That's a good thing. However, it was not what I wanted or ever even expected from a G.I. Joe live action movie. Maybe this should've been titled Action Man because it sure as hell wasn't G.I. Joe except in name only. I still need to see it on DVD but... I'm already thinking G.I. Joe deserves a more thought out remake.
DESTRO - Could they have picked a skinnier Scottish weenie to be Destro?
Meh, who gives a crap about Destro? Yeah, he wasn't what he's always been but that's the least of things people should be griping about.
GENERAL HAWK - Yeah, is there anyone more out of place as an Army General than Dennis Quaid? Didn't even give off the feeling of an experienced officer.
Didn't give off the Gen. Hawk vibe, period.
RIPCORD - Give me a break. This Wayans guy feels as military as Paris Hilton.
It's not that. Why in the blue-hell change a white character to a black character when you have a full arsenal of black joes waiting in the wings? Stalker? Roadblock? Doc? Alpine?
BARRONESS ORIGIN STORY - Okay, lady starts killing billions of people just because Duke couldn't save her brother in the Middle East. Yeah, that makes sense.
Every characters background and motives were lacking.
STORMSHADOW/SNAKEYE ORIGIN STORY - The first time they face off, we get a flashback of 5 year old ninjas fighting each other? Mkay. Didn't help at all how superhero-esque they looked in costumes.
The flashback was really oddly placed too, wasn't it? Or is it just me? Forget Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow, the entire Snake Eyes story was eliminated and that's the story that pretty much makes G.I. Joe - G.I. Joe. I mean, the entire COBRA organization is tied to HIS time in Vietnam with Storm Shadow and Stalker, further reason for Wayans to be Stalker and not Ripcord. I really didn't give a crap about the whole Snake Eyes/Storm Shadow thing and I thought the fight really failed to meet expectations. If they were hoping for Snake Eyes to be the Wolverine and get a spin-off they really better re-think that. I, at least, was intrigued by Wolverine and the
Origins movie. I would have zero interest in a Snake Eyes movie at this point.
COBRA COMMANDER ORIGIN STORY - Far and away the dumbest origin re-write. A U.S. Army soldier invades a bunker in the Middle East, sees a video about nano-bots, and decides to conquer the world? Okay. The story had already numbed me by then, so I guess I was ready for anything.
Again, the G.I. Joe/Cobra origins story is pretty much centered on Snake Eyes. He killed Baroness' brother in Vietnam by mistake, got tried in a military court of law with Destro as his defense attorney. Once discharged, his family is killed by Cobra Commander's brother in a car crash. HOW CAN THAT BE ELIMINATED AND STILL BE G.I. JOE!!!
THE TOTAL DISRESPECT FOR A MILITARY THEME - Look, GI Joe has always been about sci-fi and the outrageous, but there were so few characters in this movie who could convince me that they had served any time in our nation's armed forces. Larry Hama's military roots are what made this series a great comic book run to begin with, so I guess they went to the cartoon for inspiration. From the androgynous casting choices, to the college co-ed vibe I got with Scarlett and Ripcord, I think Duke was probably the most realistic casting choice.
A military unit the caliber of G.I. Joe is going to be cocky. It wasn't that they were unmilitarylike that ruined this, it's that there was nothing military about this to even things out. It was like
Terminator: Salvation meets
American Pie.
could go on and on about what made this movie a laugher, but I fall back on Richard Donner's original quote about the first Superman movie. He refused to make it unless the studios would allow him to take the fictional legend serious. Audiences had to respect the character as a real person. There were so many cool concepts they could have done for a GI Joe movie. From making it feel realistic instead of cartoony sci-fi, to emphasizing the recruitment of the best Green Berets, Navy Seals, etc to be members of GI Joe. And most important, making the bad guys much cooler!
Oh, there were ALOT better way to go. The best being the only way to go in my opinion. I'm not revealing it though because I know it's correct, so why let it be trashed?
really could care less if there's a sequel and I'll stick with something like the GI Joe Cobra mini-series by IDW if I want a work of fiction that actually tries not to be a three stooges fest. What a shame. This could have been a great movie in the right hands. As it is, it's destined for another Scooby-Doo run. A laughable attempt from a franchise property with a much bigger budget than its screenplay deserves.
Not as bad as Scooby-Doo, but little to no better than Fantastic Four.
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