There was a thread like this in the DC message boards a long time ago that was hilarious. I hate to rip off someone else's idea, but it was too funny not to have on this board. Here are some things Batman and his related characters would (hopefully) never say: Batman: I'm gonna go dive in a Poison Ivy bush. Robin: Why the hell has it taken me 14 years to go through puberty?!!! Alfred: Say Master Bruce, did you catch "Newlyweds" last night? Jim Gordon: I'm taking the day off tomorrow because I'm having a colonoscopy. Nightwing: I miss my old Robin costume. Spoiler: Just f**king kill me already!!!!! Stop hinting at it and just do it!!!! Jason Todd: Yep, I'm still dead. Leslie Tompkins: For the last time, I'm not Aunt May!!! Others?