Comics Wolverine Vs. Homophobia

[Zev]

Wolverine has adamantium claws, realistic healing factor (no surviving nuclear explosions!), and his choice of costume. And I'm talking about full-blown "God hates ****!" homophobia here. Go!

 

[Big Dirty Ogre]

lol.

 

[SuperFerret]

I voted for Wolverine, because a vote for Homophobia is a vote for Hitler!

 

[Herr Logan]

Wolverine would open up a can o' whoop-ass to share with homophobia, take it to Claw City on the trauma train, and then bring it back home on the meat wagon. Wolverine would hunt homophobes down like the dogs they are, scare them until they develop instantaneous enuresis, and then beat them until they're tolerant of those different from them.

 

[Almighty Pejo]

No even Wolverine can stop the stupidity of the human race. Those Homophobes whould rip his leather and spandex wearing self to shreds...poor Wolverine. Not even his superpower to conjur all 30 of the hims that run around every book would be enough. Sniff...sad day, indeed.

 

[Herr Logan]

As long as they only attacked him in groups of people no more than 20 people, he could handle it.

 

[Cyclops]

Huh?

 

[Herr Logan]

Yeah, that's right.

 

[Zev]

Originally posted by Herr Logan
As long as they only attacked him in groups of people no more than 20 people, he could handle it.

Well, Wolverine does has animal cunning and is a natural hunter. I'm sure he could make the homophobes split up to track him, then pick them off at his leisure.

No, the only REAL problem Wolverine faces is avoiding 'swish' jokes from Cyclops once he gets back. No one is going to believe that Logan just decided to help out the gay and lesbian population out of the goodness of his heart. After a great deal of finger-pointing and accusation, it will come out that Jean experimented in college... with Emma Frost.

 

[Herr Logan]

Cyclops is a learned tactician. I assume that with that comes the wisdom to choose his battles wisely. Cyclops wouldn't be the one to make those kind of jokes, since he would only want to risk getting Wolverine angry with him over something that was important. Iceman's kind of an idiot, so maybe he'd test his luck that way.

 

[Big Dirty Ogre]

EEEWWWW!!!! WOLVUREEN LOKS LIEK SUCH A *** HEAR!!!!!!!


(homophobia wins)

 

[Zev]

Originally posted by Herr Logan
Cyclops is a learned tactician. I assume that with that comes the wisdom to choose his battles wisely. Cyclops wouldn't be the one to make those kind of jokes, since he would only want to risk getting Wolverine angry with him over something that was important. Iceman's kind of an idiot, so maybe he'd test his luck that way.

BUT! Cyclops is also good friends with Beast. It's quite possible that he and Hank will devise gay insults that go right over Wolverine's head (admittedly, this is very easy ). Of course, Jean, as a telepath, will be able to discover these jokes from the source.

Additionally, Cyclops can TOTALLY burn Wolverine just by buying the entire team tickets to see The Boy From Oz. Remember when he got back the leadership of the X-Men from Storm by threatening to take the team to see Swordfish? Same thing.

 

[Doobie88]

Originally posted by Zev
Well, Wolverine does has animal cunning and is a natural hunter. I'm sure he could make the homophobes split up to track him, then pick them off at his leisure.

No, the only REAL problem Wolverine faces is avoiding 'swish' jokes from Cyclops once he gets back. No one is going to believe that Logan just decided to help out the gay and lesbian population out of the goodness of his heart. After a great deal of finger-pointing and accusation, it will come out that Jean experimented in college... with Emma Frost.

Damn, is that coming out in TPB???

 

[DareDemon]

Wolverine wins. Maybe. I dunno.

 

[Zev]

Originally posted by Doobie88
Damn, is that coming out in TPB???

No, it was a one-shot during Age of Apocalypse that Marvel will never speak of again. But it's canon, just like Turner D. Century.

 

[Zev]

Not really, though.

Although I wouldn't put it past John Bryne...

 

[Cyclops]

Is WHAT coming out in TPB? All that is is a link to a thread about Emma in X3.

 

[Zev]

Originally posted by Cyclops
Is WHAT coming out in TPB? All that is is a link to a thread about Emma in X3.

It's elegant in its simplicity, tres?

 

[Herr Logan]

Haw!!

 

[mightiest_mortal]

This poll is umm... different.
I think its about time we had a Stupidest thread in this forum poll. I dont know if thisd beat Slipstreams apology though.

 

[Herr Logan]

This thread isn't stupid, unless you have very little or no imagination and a less-than-twisted sense of humor. How about instead of wasting cyber-space by putting down threads or pointing out how it shakes boring people's sense of what's "normal," people actually contribute to the insanity and fun Zev has seen fit to share with us?

 

[Doobie88]

Why don't you save it for the Threadophobia thread.

 

[DogInTheSand]

Incidentally I once read an erotic tale were Wolverine was infect… a homophobe. He raped Kitty Pryde and when Phoenix found out, they tied him down and every X-Men male repeatedly raped Wolverine and we gotta remember the healing the factor here.

 

[mightiest_mortal]

Originally posted by Herr Logan
This thread isn't stupid, unless you have very little or no imagination and a less-than-twisted sense of humor. How about instead of wasting cyber-space by putting down threads or pointing out how it shakes boring people's sense of what's "normal," people actually contribute to the insanity and fun Zev has seen fit to share with us?

fine il start my own thread then

 

[Herr Logan]

Originally posted by DogInTheSand
Incidentally I once read an erotic tale were Wolverine was infect… a homophobe. He raped Kitty Pryde and when Phoenix found out, they tied him down and every X-Men male repeatedly raped Wolverine and we gotta remember the healing the factor here.

This is a family friendly Internet forum, God dammit. We don't speak of fan fiction here.

I think I read that one when I was searching for X-porn. That was pretty twisted. Dark Phoenix indeed.