The way I look at it in terms of the timeline is Tink presents her with two doors. Door 1: Wallow in hate and obsess over getting your revenge. Door 2: Move on, let it go and find love again. She says **** it, takes Door 1, spends a ****load of time trying to get a win over Snow before finally enacting the curse, taking them all to Storybrooke. She finds that revenge wasn't quite as fulfilling as she thought it would be, meets Owen, decides being a mother might yield better results and here we are. I honestly think she just brushed the very idea Tink presented with under the rug and forgot about it. Blaming Snow White for all of her misfortunes is Regina's actual true love.
She is so warped. That comment about Snow having Daniel killed? lol wut? Are you just forgetting who ACTUALLY ripped his heart out, sweetie?