Okay, here's where I have to disagree with you. There are a lot of pretty hardcore things that go on in the BDSM scene that I think obviously would squick you out. Biting to the point of bleeding and heavy breath play to the point of unconsciousness are some of those things. They're considered edge play, but they are a part of the scene. No matter how disgusting you might find these things to be, the reality is that those things happen between partners in a safe and CONSENSUAL manner. Rape is ANYTHING but consensual, and as a member of the leather community myself I really have to take offense to the concepts you're putting forth in your above post. Rape is a horrible crime perpetrated by someone with some serious power issues on another human being who was completely unwilling. BDSM is for the most part safe, sane, consensual, and an expression of intimacy between the parties involved. Please don't compare them.
Thank you,
jag