Finally forcing myself to catch up on this (watching Glee used to make me happy, and now it just feels like an obligation).
I'm just gonna compile all my thoughts here rather than doing my usual of spamming the thread with my play-by-play.
Could the renewed ego contest between Rachel and Mercedes be any more contrived?
Kristen Chenoweth is still nails on a chalkboard and needs to eat a sandwich. Gwyneth Paltrow's looking a little rough these days too. Holly was fun her first appearance, but I'm kind of over Paltrow just acting randomly kooky. There's really no point to either of them being back except a desperate grab for ratings, and does any non-Broadway aficionado really care about Chenoweth, and does anybody really care about Paltrow anymore? Glee is always like a decade late with whoever they think is gonna be a huge super-exciting guest star (Ricky Martin, lol, yea that would have been exciting Glee, if it was the '90s).
I totally don't buy Puck and Quinn being shoehorned together. I totally don't buy Quinn would be with Puck at this point in her life. I totally don't buy Puck has somehow secretly been in love with Quinn all along. I bought he had feelings for her in Season 1 that were unresolved at season's end, but then the writers did nothing with it and forgot all about it, and now four seasons later, it's way too late to bring it back up and pretend it was still there all along.
What is the point of Will assigning New Directions to....cover itself (and the Warblers, apparently, though it's a wonder the writers even remember "Raise Your Glass" was a Warbler song)? Are they this desperate and idea-deprived that they think they can drum up some ratings and iTunes sales with inferior retreads of songs Glee's already done years ago?
Ugh. Chenoweth is more annoying--and haggard-- than ever and she and Will's "Raise Your Glass" is awful.
Heather Morris has never been exactly Meryl Streep, but is it just me or is she really just officially checked out of Glee? She seems like she's totally phoning it in this episode (which given how blank Brittany is anyway, it's saying something that Morris' "I don't want to be here" is so obvious).
The meta about how Rachel can somehow spend a week in Lima despite Broadway/NYADA/job and the Dancing With the Stars Amber Riley in-joke about Mercedes secretly being a good dancer were mildly amusing.
Oh, they finally remember that April Rhodes bought the auditorium for New Directions. And how many times between then and now have they forgotten this with hand-wringing about where ND is going to rehearse? Last season Finn had them meet outside in the snow for pete's sake! It's just too late to pretend these plot points are still relevant just because you need them for a contrived "surprise twist" when you've obviously forgotten about them a hundred times.
If "Defying Gravity" is a diva-off between Rachel and Mercedes, why the hell is Kurt shoehorned in there too? I know it's because it was originally he and Rachel's song, but he singing here in the context of this scene doesn't make any sense.
Okay, I admit to being amused by Brittany playing against her phone in a chess game with extras in chess costumes, but that might be just because I have a weird sense of humor. This is the sort of thing I might do to pass the time on a slow day if I was some all-powerful Emperor who could just command my servants to do stuff like this.
Naya Rivera used to be too skinny, then she gained a little weight and looked really good, and now she's back to being too skinny again. Food is your friend, Naya (and Chenoweth). Looking bony is not attractive (despite what Hollywood thinks for whatever reason).
Considering they're setting up Brittana to ride off into the sunset, I'm guessing the writers forgot Demi Lovato was on this show, as they haven't even mentioned her or act like Santana's already in a relationship. Not that they did anything with her anyway.
Between Brittany mentioning scissoring for the umpteenth time, Tina saying April taught her to shoplift meat in her vagina, and April's comment about Klaine's "wedding night sodomy" (yea, pretty sure that's been going on since Season 3, April), this episode was a bit more risque than usual. Kind of unnecessarily so.
So far "Valerie" is the first I haven't skipped through, mostly because it's Santana covering herself...covering Amy Winehouse. Damn, them scrawny legs though, Naya. FOOD IS YOUR FRIEND. I don't know what possesses people to think bony=attractive.
Santana's rant at Rachel was mean (not to mention abrupt and random), but kind of true. Although Santana calling out Rachel not knowing Ryder's name was kind of pointless. She has no particular reason to know his name and he was never her teammate. And as always Will just stands uselessly and lets people go on vicious personal tirades against each other in his classroom.
I am glad Mercedes was appalled by Santana's rant, and went to comfort Rachel in the restroom. However obnoxious a diva she's been herself on occasion, Mercedes has never been as flat-out mean as Santana (or Rachel for that matter).
Sue throwing shade at New Directions' ridiculously elaborate numbers was the best part of the episode so far. But what was the point of dredging up a contrived, long-forgotten loophole to save New Directions, only to thwart it 20 minutes later with an equally contrived....double loophole?
How does Holly know to pick Jake for her dance partner? She's never seen him before. Her song was the most enjoyable though, mostly because it's the only one that wasn't an inferior retread of an old Glee number.
Quinn's "we saved him" about Finn....a little self-congratulatory there. But this is Quinn we're talking about. Narcissism is kind of par for the course. And Quinn chasing after Puck, and the kiss, and the corny romantic slow-motion twirl....yea I can't buy these two ending up together at all. They're nothing alike (aside from morally dubious, but that's everyone on Glee).
The end was the really only affecting scene, mostly because of Finn's picture (am I cynical for thinking they pimp this out to get an emotional reaction? also the oh-so-coincidental camera zoom on Rachel and/or Lea looking teary). It still seems weird that Finn isn't there. Sometimes when the whole group's assembled, especially the originals, it still seems like he should be standing there awkwardly looming over everyone.
