How do you get a friend laid?

[Kevin]

He totally missed an opportunity last night. She was drunk too.

Shadow, you're gonna have to go step by step about your friend for us to really help you. Let me see, how long have you known him?

(every question has a reason, btw)

 

[jaguarr]

Yes and eventually he'll accept help from friends in about 15 years. But for now you may need to force it on him for his own good. You see this person may very well be suffering from the same psychosis as a friend of mine. He hasn't gotten laid in almost 20 years. The only reason why he even got laid in the first place was because he was lucky enough to have a girl ask him out and force sex on him. He'll never initiate a conversation about wanting to have sex with women or some hot chick on the street. Nor will he even hang out one on one with friends. They have to pressure him as a group before he'll go outside of his mom's home just to do something. This is simply not normal in any sense of the word. My friend is too far gone now but maybe there's still a chance for this guy to have a normal life.

Lessee....in order for this plan to work, Shadow, you're going to need a couple of Viagra, a pistol, seven lengths of rope around three feet long apiece, a ballgag, a couple condoms and a really loose sorority girl. PM me when you get all the items together and I'll tell you next steps.


(But seriously....terrible advice, zanos.)


jag

 

[Kevin]

Lessee....in order for this plan to work, Shadow, you're going to need a couple of Viagra, a pistol, seven lengths of rope around three feet long apiece, a ballgag, a couple condoms and a really loose sorority girl. PM me when you get all the items together and I'll tell you next steps.


(But seriously....terrible advice, zanos.)


jag

Wow, that's quite a list. Even done it before?

 

[Mr Sparkle]

AHAHAHAHA! "force it on him" LMAO

 

[ShadowBoxing]

Shadow, you're gonna have to go step by step about your friend for us to really help you. Let me see, how long have you known him?

(every question has a reason, btw)

2 or maybe 2 and 1/2 years. Took Japanese with him his Freshman year.

 

[Erzengel]

Domo domo.....domo domo....

 

[jaguarr]

Wow, that's quite a list. Even done it before?

Not for real. I've done some pretty hot rape and kidnap scenes from a kink standpoint but those are always consensual and never the real thing.

jag

 

[Fran]

Not for real. I've done some pretty hot rape and kidnap scenes from a kink standpoint but those are always consensual and never the real thing.

jag

Be sure there's a musical soundtrack. Because if there isn't that's just perverted.

 

[jaguarr]

Be sure there's a musical soundtrack. Because if there isn't that's just perverted.

Kink is always better when it's set to music.

jag

 

[Fran]

Kink is always better when it's set to music.

jag

Hawt. :meow:

 

[Kevin]

2 or maybe 2 and 1/2 years. Took Japanese with him his Freshman year.

How close are the two of you? Does he open up to you?

 

[Kevin]

Not for real. I've done some pretty hot rape and kidnap scenes from a kink standpoint but those are always consensual and never the real thing.

jag

That sounds fun... seriously.

 

[Eddie Brock]

How close are the two of you? Does he open up to you?

oh my....you're not suggesting that...SHADOW take his virginity are you?

kidding

 

[Kevin]

oh my....you're not suggesting that...SHADOW take his virginity are you?

kidding

*sigh* The one time i'm not trying to be gay...

 

[Fran]

Own3d

 

[Kevin]

Own3d

I was owned? Damn.

 

[jaguarr]

That sounds fun... seriously.

It is. My wife knows plenty of leather daddies in your area that I'm sure would be glad to show you the ropes.

jag

 

[Kevin]

It is. My wife knows plenty of leather daddies in your area that I'm sure would be glad to show you the ropes.

jag

...

 

[zanos]

Lessee....in order for this plan to work, Shadow, you're going to need a couple of Viagra, a pistol, seven lengths of rope around three feet long apiece, a ballgag, a couple condoms and a really loose sorority girl. PM me when you get all the items together and I'll tell you next steps.


(But seriously....terrible advice, zanos.)


jag

Not really. How many ppl out there are afraid to take a drink for whatever reason until you actually take them to a bar, order one for them and put it into their hand? This could of course apply to anything. Stick around you might learn something.

 

[jaguarr]

Not really. How many ppl out there are afraid to take a drink for whatever reason until you actually take them to a bar, order one for them and put it into their hand? This could of course apply to anything. Stick around you might learn something.

You can't force anyone into anything. You can put them in situations where they have opportunity but unless you drug them into a hard-on and accompany them into the bedroom, take their dick in your hand and insert it right into the vagina and then start pumping their hips you really can't make them have sex. Those steps are a bit beyond my limits in helping a friend, but if you have gone there then more power to you.

jag

 

[Arkady Rossovich]

He totally missed an opportunity last night. She was drunk too.

Again,let me repeat myself. RAPE.How else are you going to get your friend to have sex?I do not think he is of the social type,and from what you say..he has a hard time getting along with people.Its called "Anti-Social" where people can not,or have a hard time doing anything with people around.He could be shy,that would make sence also.

 

[mightiest_mortal]

Again,let me repeat myself. RAPE.How else are you going to get your friend to have sex?I do not think he is of the social type,and from what you say..he has a hard time getting along with people.Its called "Anti-Social" where people can not,or have a hard time doing anything with people around.He could be shy,that would make sence also.

So wait... ar you saying he should get his friend to rape someone? or they should all group together and rape his friend?

 

[JLBats]

Again,let me repeat myself. RAPE.How else are you going to get your friend to have sex?I do not think he is of the social type,and from what you say..he has a hard time getting along with people.Its called "Anti-Social" where people can not,or have a hard time doing anything with people around.He could be shy,that would make sence also.

Dude, for the last time, you're odd and alienating and this is a terrible suggestion

 

[tzarinna]

Don't forget crazy.

 

[JLBats]

Don't forget crazy.

I've already told him it's a ******ed, hideous, misogynistic, dehumanizing idea.

I seriously want to know what country this guy lives in, since he seems to honestly believe that in Europe men just point at the women they want and proceed to rape them