Jourmugand vs. America

Discussion in 'SHH Community Forum' started by Wilhelm-Scream, Nov 1, 2007.

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  1. Wilhelm-Scream

    Wilhelm-Scream Registered

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    There's a poster who could see a rose, in the park, on a summer day, and be reminded of how corrupt, fat and arrogant all of America is.





    There's a poster who could post in a thread about Vegan recipes, or collecting stamps, and somehow turn it into a passive aggressive little anti-American screed.
    His name is Jourmugand, and he's hilarious/sad.

    We all have topics of which we're fond, but he is so wounded by America, so jealous, so indignant, that he seems consumed by a desire to see it fail, to say "I told you so.", to point out how inferior it is, daily.

    Some of these observations are totally true and on-topic ( such as when he's in "America, the Thread", talking about how Bush has mismanaged the indefensible war.:up: )
    But some of his bat-s*** crazy segues into Anti-Americanism are freaking hilariously senseless.
    Enjoy................




    ( because not enough Americans enjoy broadband :whatever: )




    Can we think of any other countries where there's a pressure to succeed, or where people have no say and blend into "the crowd"?




    (*regarding the fact that if there was a homosexuality gene, parents would have it removed*
    America is hardly the only place where homosexuality is considered to be bad (huLLO, the Middle East? WTH did he see the need to differentiate?
    I love how he tries to sound open-minded and fair, but his odd focus on AMERICA gives him away. The poster he was responding to didn't say a word about America.)




    These are hilarious, where the arrogant guy condemns a whole nation for it's arrogance. lol




    Hahaha, this prejudiced, sad creature knows nothing about the fitness obsessed Americans, and the gluttonous, food-worshiping French.




    Yeah! :huh:
    "Gutter" is one of his favorite words of derision btw.
    He's always saying, "The Bionic Woman's ratings are in THE GUTTER."
    Or "Fantastic Four 2: The Rise of the Silver Surfer should be thrown in THE GUTTER."
    He should learn a new one, like "kicked to the curb" or something.




    Yes, we simple-minded Americans fell under Bush's diabolical spell, because we have such a low standard of living and never get vacations. Yes.




    Bring it on!




    I've, uh, got some GREAT Italian, Japanese, British, French and Indian gore movies to show you, guy.




    This is my favorite. Tzarinna made a thread because she likes soup. She made the mistake of letting her uncultured, oafish Americaness hang out by saying that she associates eating hot soup with the colder weather of Fall/Winter.
    Well, European soups are not so LIMITED in scope!




    wow




    From a thread about the "ethnic cleansing" of dark skinned people in L.A., by gangs.




    (God, that one CUTS!
    Yeah, thank God neither is Germany, or the U.K., or France, or Japan, or Russia, or..........)




    Yep, Global Warming.....the cause?
    America.
    China has nothing to do with it.
    The ignorance and prejudice is RICH.




    (an American doesn't enjoy watching his girlfriend make out with another woman, like everyone does in Europe.I know that's a uniquely American trait....feeling uncomfortable watching your girlfriend make out with someone else.)




    In Europe, no rain means gold, puppies and rainbows for the children of the unemployed!




    What.....the.....f***?
    I.....assure you, everyone I know is thin and many of our meals incorporate cheese.




    Oh, the humanity. Who "flips the bill" for everyone's health care in other countries?




    This one is great. He's tired of beating around the bush.
    Oh YES! He can almost TASTE it! It will be SO glorious! *twist moustache*




    (the bees disappear, plants become scarce, people die)
    Yeah, thank god for that.




    ...eat babies, or rape babies...




    Hahaha, what a simplistic view.
    My boss is a Black woman and makes 10 times what I, a White man make.
    Love the generalizations.




    (a thread about cutting yourself, a worldwide problem/past-time. Again, why does he hear "people cut themselves." and think, "America"?)




    (This was in a thread about a boy who killed himself when his parents forbade him to play video games. The boy was Russian. Bizarre. Guess it's time to let go of your bigotry and picture this happening in Russia, so you can get in line with reality. *shrug*)




    A guy said he didn't enjoy Rugby, so, knowing that Americans are drawn to violence like no other scum on Earth, he tries to entice the person, with a promise of something even MORE violent than American Football. Hahahahaha




    (No wonder he is so angry with the greedy, corrupt Americans!)




    (because Marion Jones admitted to cheating. Just stunning.)




    More awesome generalizations and Doomsaying. BTW, I'm American and, I'm not stressed. I'm quite relaxed here.




    That's weird, then why are so many of us fighting to establish it?




    Filthy, Lazy Americans!
    I wonder how these Americans work so hard to be "the best", to the point that they are constantly stressed, while.....sitting on their lazy butts.




    Yes, we keep dark-skinned people in holding tanks in New York, to make soup out of their bones, which we only, daftly eat in October. Yes.




    FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T BUY A HOUSE IN AMERICA! IT WILL EAT YOU!!!!WITHOUT CHEESE, BECAUSE IT'S A FAT, LAZY, ARROGANT HOUSE, THAT IS A WORKAHOLIC!




    God Bless You, Jourmugand......and God Bless America
     
  2. The Lizard

    The Lizard Didn't eat Billy

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    You'd think that a poster named after the giant serpent wrapped around the whole world in Norse mythology would have a more globally balanced viewpoint.


    Oh, and....in before the lock! :D
     
  3. jaguarr

    jaguarr Be Your Own Hero

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    Haha! This thread was inevitable.

    jag
     
  4. rdh007

    rdh007 Brit Wannabe

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    Thou speakest the truth again, Goodman Wil.

    Though I have to say as an American, that he's not always wrong.
     
  5. Darthphere

    Darthphere Kneel before 'Drox!

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    Yeah, but his demeanor and timing is.
     
  6. Wilhelm-Scream

    Wilhelm-Scream Registered

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    The stuff that's funny is like how European soup habits aren't as constrictive as American ones, lol.
     
  7. chamber-music

    chamber-music Infinity Ammo

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    what country is Jourmugand from?
     
  8. Immortalfire

    Immortalfire The Pain of Fast Air

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    Latveria
     
  9. Wilhelm-Scream

    Wilhelm-Scream Registered

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    The one that's superior to America in every way where there is no injustice or crime, everyone is physically and mentally healthy and life is lived in perfect balance.
     
  10. Fran

    Fran Banned User

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    Brilliant!!!
     
  11. Arkady Rossovich

    Arkady Rossovich Registered

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  12. DBella

    DBella Seducente/Mortale

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    Utopia.
     
  13. StorminNorman

    StorminNorman Registered

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    This thread is brilliant, :up:
     
  14. hippie_hunter

    hippie_hunter The King is Back!

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    And just what does that have to do with anything :huh:

    The threads about your very obvious and ignorant hatred and often wrong generalizations of the United States. Not war.

    And just what country do you come from? :huh:
     
  15. SoulManX

    SoulManX The Inspector!

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    This thread gives me a funny feeling in my tummy[​IMG]
     
  16. union_jak

    union_jak Licky licky

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    Jourmugand enjoys letting me know I "Pronounced" Union Jack wrong every so often :whatever:
     
  17. PWN3R

    PWN3R Instagram:@Mannie_Bothans

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    HAhahaha this is the best quote ever.
     
  18. Addendum

    Addendum Registered

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    Uncle Sam killed Jourmugand's puppy. He was driving an SUV, listening to gangsta rap while eating McDonald's and smoking Lucky Strikes, while in the backseat Uncle Sam's girlfriend was burning coal while spraying old aerosol cans with CFC in them out the windows, and on the back was a ribbon magnet that read "Support our troops"
     
  19. Fran

    Fran Banned User

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    When are you getting your 360 back?

    I miss you. I miss us. :o

    :csad:
     
  20. PWN3R

    PWN3R Instagram:@Mannie_Bothans

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    Another 2 or 3 weeks.:cmad: All because of the evilness of America.
     
  21. rdh007

    rdh007 Brit Wannabe

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    How has this not closed yet? I really am surprised.
     
  22. Fran

    Fran Banned User

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    They don't close threads that are true.
     
  23. Dew k. Mosi

    Dew k. Mosi Hype Award Winner

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    I'm closing this, because no matter how funny the first post is (I am crying from laughing right now), we can't attack other posters
     
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