Hang in there, you're bound to find someone. Easier said than done, but if most of those theatre girls are being rude and really aren't showing any signs that they really like you as more than a friend than it's good that you're moving on.
By the way, other than girls how have you been Nell?
Other than girls, I'm doing awesome, and even the lack of girls thing isn't even a concern anymore. I'm really more making conversation than anything.
The first girl you replied about - yes I asked her out last semester. There was a party last semester for the whole theatre department, and her and I hung out a lot at the party. She was particularly drunk, and seemed to be coming on to me. She was really physical with me, and saying things like "I'm really attracted to you" She's incredibly hot, but at that time, I had heard a lot of stories about her having drug issues and stuff, so I didn't make a move to take her home with me or anything. But seeing her around on campus the next couple days and talking to her, I started getting into her a little more, so I finally asked her out. She told me no, flat out. And like the next time I saw her, she flat out told me that she wouldn't give me her # because she wasn't interested in me, and it was just a waste of time for her to give me her number when she wouldn't want to talk to me anyways. So I was like, whatever, cool, I'm not even hurt because her flat out up front blatant honesty was almost a breathe of fresh air, even if it was a bit rude. But ever since then, everytime I'm at a party that she's at, or encounter her on campus, like I said she's getting involved in my conversations to trash talk and make me look bad.
For the other 2 girls, one of them I know is not interested in me, at all. I knew that when I asked her out, and in fact I struggled with asking her out for awhile because I just knew she wasn't interested. And it wasn't an emo "She'd never want me" type deal, it was more just recognition of the situation. But I did it anyways, and when she said no I really wasn't too upset about it. And yea, since she's in the department with me, I'm totally okay with being "just friends", so I try to be civil with her since I see her on a daily basis, but it's hard even to just say "hi" to her.
The other one, I think MIGHT have liked me. When I first met her she was all over me, and always flirting and stuff. She reminded me a lot of my ex - but the good traits of my ex, not the crazy. I picked on and teased this girl a lot, and I think that's where things changed. I don't think she took my teasing as that, I think I probably said some things that really hurt her feelings, so when I asked her out she said no, and has been off and on with me since then in terms of friendliness. Sometimes, she's REALLY friendly, like when she invited me to her birthday party. She made a big deal about wanting to see me there, and her and I talked and hung out a LOT at her party, but I haven't talked to her since. Sometimes when I see her on campus, she won't even acknowledge me there, and other times she initiates the conversation with me. And there are times when we are conversating that she brings up some of the things I've said to tease her. But yea, she's really inconsistent with me when it comes to her being friendly or not.
But really, I'm writing a lot about things that really aren't an issue with me. Like I said, I'm doing great right now, and even though I'm not currently dating anyone, I'm not really too worried about it. Things are really starting to come together for me in school, I'm changing my major and minor to things that I'm really in love with doing, I'm in another theatre production this semester which is a step up from any productions I was in last semester, I'm doing a field placement at a local high school for part of my teaching certification program, and I got myself a new job that, while not being glamorous (it's still retail), it's much better than what I was doing previously. The worst thing that's happened is that my brother has decided to remove me from his family and is no longer having anything to do with me, but the silver lining is that in a weird way, it's the best thing that's ever happened to me. My brother and I have had some unspoken issues for awhile, and his actions recently have really opened up my eyes and the situation has really allowed me to take one of the biggest steps I've ever taken towards actually becoming my own person and not depending on anyone else for my happiness (whether that be family, friends, potential girlfriends, whatever). I might be feeling better about my life right now at this very moment than I've ever felt about my life at any point. For the first time ever, I think I can honestly look at myself and my situation and say that I am happy with myself, who I am, who I am becoming, and where I am and where I'm going.
So that was a really long post, lol, and half of it has nothing to do with relationships. But I've been feeling a LOT of different emotions for the past couple months, so I guess in a way this was a much needed rant, haha
