In short, it didn't go too badly Joe.
Jason was extremely nervous when we pulled up to the church. He was quiet all morning and didn't even eat breakfast because he said his stomach was upset (I think it's wrong that any religion has enough power to make any person sick like that). Even his hands were sweating.
Anyway, when we got there I was like, "I'll wait for you out here." But he insisted that I go with him. I told him this really wasn't my thing, but he was like please so I went into the joint with him. Interestingly enough, the place was completely devoid of any people...and to be honest it was a little creepy in there because it was so dark with the high ceilings and stain glassed windows. I didn't like the vibe I got from there at all.
Jason wanted me out of earshot as he gave his confession so I don't know how that went. But when he was ready to meet with the priest he motioned me to follow him up these steps to this office off to the side of the podium. The priest was a man in his 70s I'd say. Very friendly and certainly he has a great repore (sp?) with Jason...been knowing him since he was a little boy. Apparently Jase's family went to church a lot when he was younger and then they all just kinda...fell off. I stood by the door behind Jason as he sat down in front of the priest at his desk.
Anyway, when the priest asked Jase why he had asked to meet with him it took Jase like...a full 3 or 4 minutes to speak up. Like literally. I was like, "This guy is never gonna say it."
But then Jase took a deep breath and finally blurted out that he and I had been involved sexually and that he couldn't see himself living out the rest of his days without me involved in his life. It probably wasn't the most tactful way of putting it, but at least he kept it real. And the part about living out the rest of his days...that really got me. Jason never talks like that...I mean, he has his moments, but he stays away from the corny mushy stuff. But when he was talking to this priest it was as if he was talking to his father--and I wasn't even in the room.
The priest was noticeably serious/disturbed by what Jason was telling him. He kept looking me up and down and that made me uncomfortable. He started to reach for his Bible and I just shot him the look of death like "You better f***ing NOT damn him". He looked at me and I think he got my memo because he just patted the Bible and kept listening. The more Jason kept talking the more I realized how important this was to him. Then he started wiping back tears and he kept saying "Sorry", or "Excuse Me", but the tears just kept coming. Both the priest and I gave him kleenex at the same time, but I let the priest be the actual one to give it to him.
Jase wanted to know if God still loved him. And the priest said that He did. He then said that God hates what we're doing but that His love for us will always be unconditional. This latter part confused the...ahem, hell...out of me because if God hates what we're doing, then how can his love be without conditions?
Anyway, Jason seemed to be very relieved at the moment the priest said he was still loved by God. It was as if he blanked out and ignored the rest. He smiled a bit, almost in relief. He asked if the priest would marry us. At that point I was like "WTF!?!?!?!"
But then Jason qualified the statement by saying hypothetically. In other words, did the church believe in Gay marriage or would it perform those types of unions. The priest said no, but that if we were committed in our hearts that was all we needed.
Jason shook his hand and left, and I just walked out after him. I thought about it and poked my head back through the door and mouthed "Thank you" to the priest and he nodded back. When we came out we realized that the service would be starting soon, because people were filing in. So we stayed for the service which was boring as ever. But afterward, Jason said he felt a lot better. He said that maybe we should get back together because he couldn't think of a better person to burn in hell with than me. He laughed at this, but I was deeply insulted even though I knew he was joking.
We just got back in from taking a walk around the neighborhood and we've talked some things through. I think we might get back together, but I think he still needs some time. Nothing should be powerful to break us up aside from us ourselves--not the Church. And the fact that he can give them that kind of authority over his life deeply disturbs me.
At any rate, I'm moving out Saturday.
