The Last Crusade of Relationships

[hopefuldreamer]

I don't know why I'm still argueing about this either!

I think I just tend to stick up for someone if everyone is siding against them. Especially if I see they have a fair case that deserves defending

EDIT: 4ft drop? okay, it's getting a bit harder to defend you!

I thought you meant you just bopped him one in the jaw and then gave a good blow to the chest for good measure to make sure he stayed down.

Tackling him into a 4ft drop could have killed him if he'd hit his head, and THEN you punched him a few times... When he was down?

I'd say it was probably fair to call it excessive force

 

[SpideyVille]

Be careful.

It -can- work. It can also end very, very badly.

I had a huge crush on this girl. She had a boyfriend, so I never made a move. Like you, I'm in the theatre department with her. She directed a show I was in, and we spent a lot of time together with the show, as well as outside the show, with cast dinners and stuff. Her and I became good friends.

She did say to me at one point that if she wasn't with her boyfriend, she'd probably like me too. She was a legit friend to me, so I was able to be "just friends" with her despite having a huge crush on her. It was the one instance in my life where having a crush on her didn't interfere with the friendship.

It doesn't happen very often tho. So just beware.

Yeah, that sounds like me and my best friend right now. I think she's very attractive, but never made a move when I first met her because she had a boyfriend. She's single now, but I still wouldn't make a move because she's the closest female friend that I've ever had, and realistically, we both want different things from a relationship and live different types of lifestyles, so I know it wouldn't work out so I don't even bother.

Plus the last time I was good friends with a girl I liked, she found out and stopped talking to me because she thought it was awkward. That sucked, but it showed me just how much of a friend she was.

Glad you got it cleared up. At least now you know for sure

Thanks. It's funny because after the talk, people saw me with a big smile and thought we were going out. But I told them that even though I didn't get great news, I was still happy with the result because it was like all of that pressure was lifted from me.

Really glad to hear that you sorted that out mate.

Look, if she doesn't feel the same way it really doesn't matter does it? As you said, you can now move on. You can still be friends with her, again if she's willing and all, but you don't have to be like best friends with her or anything.

The thing about those feelings is that they do tend to linger. And it's best if you can spend them somewhere else.

Yeah, realistically I don't have high hopes of us really being friends for too long, or at all after this. But I figure its at least worth a try. If there's one thing I've learned, its that everyone at least deserves a chance. She says she wants to be friends, then let's see what kind of effort she puts in now. But whatever happens happens and I won't sweat it.

Okay, good!

How did your show go btw?

It was great. Honestly, I think the show could've been a lot better than it was in terms of things like the set design and lighting and sound, but we made the most with what we had and I know that the people who went really enjoyed themselves and the show and that's all that matters. It was a fun experience and I can't wait for the next show.

 

[Anita18]

You sound like the guys attorney. Man, I love Lawyers.

No, I said "LESS THAN" 30 seconds. Just to make the point it was not like I had a lot of time to go over every action that carefully.

I tackled him off my deck, and hit him in the face a few times. I don't know how many, I was not keeping count.

His ribs broke from the force of landing on his back from a 4ft drop with a heavy man on top of him.

Part of the reason I had to pay a chunk of his medical bills was because of my income level. Discrimination if I've ever seen it.

I don't know why I'm still argueing about this either!

I think I just tend to stick up for someone if everyone is siding against them. Especially if I see they have a fair case that deserves defending

EDIT: 4ft drop? okay, it's getting a bit harder to defend you!

I thought you meant you just bopped him one in the jaw and then gave a good blow to the chest for good measure to make sure he stayed down.

Tackling him into a 4ft drop could have killed him if he'd hit his head, and THEN you punched him a few times... When he was down?

I'd say it was probably fair to call it excessive force

I actually know or am related to more lawyers than doctors (which is unusual because I'm Asian ), but because of that, I have a better idea of why the law is than people who just assume lawyers are slimeballs.

If an individual was slapped with someone else's $15,000 medical bill, there's usually a good reason why. And class discrimination is usually not the main answer. Especially given how richer people can afford better lawyers.

Yeah, realistically I don't have high hopes of us really being friends for too long, or at all after this. But I figure its at least worth a try. If there's one thing I've learned, its that everyone at least deserves a chance. She says she wants to be friends, then let's see what kind of effort she puts in now. But whatever happens happens and I won't sweat it.

Not sweating it is definitely good. That means you're emotionally free to pursue other opportunities.

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

I don't know why I'm still argueing about this either!

I think I just tend to stick up for someone if everyone is siding against them. Especially if I see they have a fair case that deserves defending

EDIT: 4ft drop? okay, it's getting a bit harder to defend you!

I thought you meant you just bopped him one in the jaw and then gave a good blow to the chest for good measure to make sure he stayed down.

Tackling him into a 4ft drop could have killed him if he'd hit his head, and THEN you punched him a few times... When he was down?

I'd say it was probably fair to call it excessive force

It's not often someone will come right out and say that they changed their mind due to facts becoming known to them. Even more so when that is on a public forum.

 

[SuperMike335!!]

I don't know why I'm still argueing about this either!

I think I just tend to stick up for someone if everyone is siding against them. Especially if I see they have a fair case that deserves defending

EDIT: 4ft drop? okay, it's getting a bit harder to defend you!

I thought you meant you just bopped him one in the jaw and then gave a good blow to the chest for good measure to make sure he stayed down.

Tackling him into a 4ft drop could have killed him if he'd hit his head, and THEN you punched him a few times... When he was down?

I'd say it was probably fair to call it excessive force

Well now it looks like I’m the one on an Island!

When you’re bent over, and someone is standing over you, tackling them is the fastest and most convenient thing to do. The deck is only 4ft long, and 4ft tall, and there is no railing. Its not like a took a running start. He didn’t hit his head, he was still trying to fight back, so I punched him a few times. Granted it was more out of anger in the moment, which I don't feel bad about.

I was not convicted of excessive force. The guy had several priors for other violent offenses himself, and he admitted to hitting me in the groin, which is considered assault of creative organ, and actually can get you prison time if you cause any real damage.

The law, as far as criminal law was on my side.

In the USA there are two forms of legal action.

There is also civil law. That is where people sue each other and such.

That is where a case can be dismissed under criminal law and you don't see any jail or prison time, but that guy can still turn around and sue you for liable damages. Even if you were not found guilty of a crime.

Great laws we got here.

 

[SuperMike335!!]

I actually know or am related to more lawyers than doctors (which is unusual because I'm Asian ), but because of that, I have a better idea of why the law is than people who just assume lawyers are slimeballs.

If an individual was slapped with someone else's $15,000 medical bill, there's usually a good reason why. And class discrimination is usually not the main answer. Especially given how richer people can afford better lawyers.

You're Asian? I tend to make an image of someone in my mind, when I read their writing, and I certainly had not thought you looked Asian.

Thing is a could have appealed that decision, but that could have cost me 20,000$ when all is said and done, and it was less expensive to just pay the 15,000$ and be done with it.

 

[Anita18]

You're Asian? I tend to make an image of someone in my mind, when I read their writing, and I certainly had not thought you looked Asian.

Thing is a could have appealed that decision, but that could have cost me 20,000$ when all is said and done, and it was less expensive to just pay the 15,000$ and be done with it.

I get that sometimes. What did you expect?

And yeah, sometimes it's between a rock and a hard place when it comes to civil and criminal law. IMO at least you got off without a criminal conviction cause yeah, the guy shouldn't have hit you in the first place. Your tackling him off the deck and punching him after all that was likely the reason of losing the civil suit. You put him in the hospital when you didn't have to.

Now if we had universal healthcare like where hopefulsuicide is (although granted, the UK's NHS gets a really bad rap for other reasons ), we wouldn't have the need to sue each other for sky-high medical expenses. My dad always lectured me, when I was learning to drive, about the story of one of his friends who caused a car accident and had to pay out the nose for the victim's medical bills. Tough break, but the accident was deemed his fault so they're allowed to do that. If the victim can't afford their medical bills because they were hurt by someone else, that really sucks too.

 

[Lily Adler]

Well, I expected you to be Anita Van Buren from Law & Order.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

It's not often someone will come right out and say that they changed their mind due to facts becoming known to them. Even more so when that is on a public forum.

I change my mind all the time about stuff, just cause of my mood or a fresh perspective!

Well now it looks like I’m the one on an Island!

Sorry

At least I made a few good points for your case

When you’re bent over, and someone is standing over you, tackling them is the fastest and most convenient thing to do. The deck is only 4ft long, and 4ft tall, and there is no railing. Its not like a took a running start. He didn’t hit his head, he was still trying to fight back, so I punched him a few times. Granted it was more out of anger in the moment, which I don't feel bad about.

I was not convicted of excessive force. The guy had several priors for other violent offenses himself, and he admitted to hitting me in the groin, which is considered assault of creative organ, and actually can get you prison time if you cause any real damage.

The law, as far as criminal law was on my side.

In the USA there are two forms of legal action.

There is also civil law. That is where people sue each other and such.

That is where a case can be dismissed under criminal law and you don't see any jail or prison time, but that guy can still turn around and sue you for liable damages. Even if you were not found guilty of a crime.

Great laws we got here.

I get that sometimes. What did you expect?

And yeah, sometimes it's between a rock and a hard place when it comes to civil and criminal law. IMO at least you got off without a criminal conviction cause yeah, the guy shouldn't have hit you in the first place. Your tackling him off the deck and punching him after all that was likely the reason of losing the civil suit. You put him in the hospital when you didn't have to.

Now if we had universal healthcare like where hopefulsuicide is (although granted, the UK's NHS gets a really bad rap for other reasons ), we wouldn't have the need to sue each other for sky-high medical expenses. My dad always lectured me, when I was learning to drive, about the story of one of his friends who caused a car accident and had to pay out the nose for the victim's medical bills. Tough break, but the accident was deemed his fault so they're allowed to do that. If the victim can't afford their medical bills because they were hurt by someone else, that really sucks too.

Yeah, I'm officially lost.

It's just so different over here!

If someone caused a major traffic accident over here, each of the injured parties would get their injuries treated for free at hospitals that are all funded by the government (our taxes).

And then each driver could claim through their individual insurance companies (it is illegal to drive without insurance over here) for the cost of damages to their vehicles. The person responsible also has an insurance company, who would then have to pay out for all those damages. Assuming the person responsible was every allowed to drive again, their insurance cost would be through the roof as they would now be considered high risk.

But it's a system i'm beginning to be quite grateful for.

P.S. Do you guys get absolutely no free health care? I've never been too clear on that.

 

[Anita18]

Yeah, I'm officially lost.

It's just so different over here!

If someone caused a major traffic accident over here, each of the injured parties would get their injuries treated for free at hospitals that are all funded by the government (our taxes).

And then each driver could claim through their individual insurance companies (it is illegal to drive without insurance over here) for the cost of damages to their vehicles. The person responsible also has an insurance company, who would then have to pay out for all those damages. Assuming the person responsible was every allowed to drive again, their insurance cost would be through the roof as they would now be considered high risk.

But it's a system i'm beginning to be quite grateful for.

P.S. Do you guys get absolutely no free health care? I've never been too clear on that.

Some kids and elderly folks do, under Medicare. What's funny is that there's an ongoing joke among Democrats, where crazy uneducated Republicans (like the talking heads of Fox News) spout off about against keeping government out of our lives...except when it comes to Medicare, SS, women's rights, and gay people. "Keep government out of my Medicare!"

Otherwise we have to buy insurance from our employers. It's a bit of a joke, since some employers are associated with better insurance providers than others, and most of the time you can't choose. If anyone could choose the health insurance providers they wanted, it would be more of a free market, but as it is, it's a bit of a monopoly depending on where you are. (And getting a health plan when you're unemployed or freelance is RIDICULOUSLY expensive. For a while my dad was only working because of the health insurance. I bet it's pretty common.) And then, there are levels. Like you pay more out of pocket to see a specialist directly, or choose your doctors (what's called a PPO), but I'm young and I do the HMO, which is cheaper but you have to get a referral to see a specialist and you get a smaller pool of doctors to choose from.

And everyone here knows someone who got denied an insurance claim. In which case you're on the hook for everything, and healthcare here is EXPENSIVE. My cousin's in med school and he says it's expensive because hospitals don't actually expect to get paid fully, so they just jack up the price for everyone to scare them into paying some of it. It's another reason why people here are so hesitant about genetic testing. If you know you have a higher risk of developing say, breast cancer, insurance companies have the right to limit or deny you coverage for "pre-existing conditions." So in that case, it's better not to know, which is very sad.

Despite Fox News's insistence that people get bankrupt from their own fault, most cases of bankruptcy are caused from inability to pay medical expenses. It is absolutely scary, considering that I could come down with a chronic ailment and it will bankrupt me despite me saving diligently for my entire working life.

 

[Anita18]

Oh, and even if you have insurance, you still have to pay out of pocket for SOMETHING. Like, 30% or so. So no, for most people here, healthcare is never free.

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

Well now it looks like I’m the one on an Island!

When you’re bent over, and someone is standing over you, tackling them is the fastest and most convenient thing to do. The deck is only 4ft long, and 4ft tall, and there is no railing. Its not like a took a running start. He didn’t hit his head, he was still trying to fight back, so I punched him a few times. Granted it was more out of anger in the moment, which I don't feel bad about.

I was not convicted of excessive force. The guy had several priors for other violent offenses himself, and he admitted to hitting me in the groin, which is considered assault of creative organ, and actually can get you prison time if you cause any real damage.

The law, as far as criminal law was on my side.

In the USA there are two forms of legal action.

There is also civil law. That is where people sue each other and such.

That is where a case can be dismissed under criminal law and you don't see any jail or prison time, but that guy can still turn around and sue you for liable damages. Even if you were not found guilty of a crime.

Great laws we got here.

Ok, the only reason I got involved in the discussion was because people were still debating about the rights and wrongs, and from what I could see, no-one had any clear idea of what actually happened, they were debating over what they imagined happened, based on skant info.

I am not gonna judge you, that is not why I came in here, I was just wanting to hear what actually happened, just in case you were treating something lightly that could get you into serious trouble if you did it again.

Now, the only thing I am not sure about in your telling, is whether he was still trying to hit you after that initial nut punch, and that was why you felt the need to lift him up from that position.
Because, from your description, he was still trying to hit you, in your words 'fight back', only after you grabbed him in that way in order to drop him, hence your description, 'fight back'. So perhaps the drop option was not necesarry if he had only wanted to give you that one punch.

Everyone else is giving their opinion, so the onyl reason I am wondering about that point was because I would have a slightly different viewpoint if he was still hitting you after that nut punch, and that was why you felt you had to tackle him that way, or whether the drop was just in retaliation for the nut punch, and the guy had only planned on giving you the nut punch and that was all.
edit: but still, if you dwarfed him, there would be other options than to drop him in a dangerous way like that, even if he was still hitting you. I mean, i guess that is why he hit you in the nuts, because he knew his other normal punches would have no effect on you.
edit: But, y'know, if you were doubled over in extreme pain, and he was still hitting you around somewhere vulnerable like the eye, maybe that drop option is one i could sympathise with.

Yeah, as the full story emerges, we get a different picture, this guy was a fighter looking for a fight (given what you were saying about his previous convictions, he was not just some guy who was in a moment of temporary insanity because it concerned his daughter), and he picked on someone who could mash him but good. It's good if he is taught a lesson, but not so good if you go overboard in such a way that you could have done him in, and wrecked your life as a result.

I guess the reason people are still talking about it is because they just wanted to make sure you weren't going to do something in the future like this, if indeed you did go overboard in your reaction.

 

[terry78]

Free health care? Never heard'a such.

 

[SuperMike335!!]

Ok, the only reason I got involved in the discussion was because people were still debating about the rights and wrongs, and from what I could see, no-one had any clear idea of what actually happened, they were debating over what they imagined happened, based on skant info.

I am not gonna judge you, that is not why I came in here, I was just wanting to hear what actually happened, just in case you were treating something lightly that could get you into serious trouble if you did it again.

Now, the only thing I am not sure about in your telling, is whether he was still trying to hit you after that initial nut punch, and that was why you felt the need to lift him up from that position.
Because, from your description, he was still trying to hit you, in your words 'fight back', only after you grabbed him in that way in order to drop him, hence your description, 'fight back'. So perhaps the drop option was not necesarry if he had only wanted to give you that one punch.

Everyone else is giving their opinion, so the onyl reason I am wondering about that point was because I would have a slightly different viewpoint if he was still hitting you after that nut punch, and that was why you felt you had to tackle him that way, or whether the drop was just in retaliation for the nut punch, and the guy had only planned on giving you the nut punch and that was all.
edit: but still, if you dwarfed him, there would be other options than to drop him in a dangerous way like that, even if he was still hitting you. I mean, i guess that is why he hit you in the nuts, because he knew his other normal punches would have no effect on you.
edit: But, y'know, if you were doubled over in extreme pain, and he was still hitting you around somewhere vulnerable like the eye, maybe that drop option is one i could sympathise with.

Yeah, as the full story emerges, we get a different picture, this guy was a fighter looking for a fight (given what you were saying about his previous convictions, he was not just some guy who was in a moment of temporary insanity because it concerned his daughter), and he picked on someone who could mash him but good. It's good if he is taught a lesson, but not so good if you go overboard in such a way that you could have done him in, and wrecked your life as a result.

I guess the reason people are still talking about it is because they just wanted to make sure you weren't going to do something in the future like this, if indeed you did go overboard in your reaction.

No need to be concerned there.

If I'm in a violent situation I need to go full force, and make damn sure its ended quickly. I still hit very hard, BUT with a bad back I simply am not as able to fight, especially on the ground. I went from a guy who was a very good wrestler, to not being able to grapple for ****. I don’t have the same body I used to 10 years ago.

I've got two crushed discs in my lower back, and separated cartilage in both knees, bad hearing, and have had a severe enough concussion to have mild brain damage. All while working for our wonderful USA Gov. I live in some pain and legally I am a partially disabled veteran. One of the reasons I didn't get convicted of excessive self defense when I beat daddy Rocky into hamburger.

The bottom line is I don't go out looking for a fight, EVER. I strongly prefer to avoid them, as anyone with permanent physical damage does.

 

[SuperMike335!!]

Free health care? Never heard'a such.

Nothing in this world is free.

You got to pay some way or another.

Got no universal Gov health care? Have to pay out of pocket or have a debt, or pay for an insurance plan.

Got universal government health care? Have to pay higher taxes, and then you got the government making health care decisions for you and a lot less freedom in treatment options.

Take your pick. There is no way to have it perfect.

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

No need to be concerned there.

If I'm in a violent situation I need to go full force, and make damn sure its ended quickly. I still hit very hard, BUT with a bad back I simply am not as able to fight, especially on the ground. I went from a guy who was a very good wrestler, to not being able to grapple for ****. I don’t have the same body I used to 10 years ago.

I've got two crushed discs in my lower back, and separated cartilage in both knees, bad hearing, and have had a severe enough concussion to have mild brain damage. All while working for our wonderful USA Gov. I live in some pain and legally I am a partially disabled veteran. One of the reasons I didn't get convicted of excessive self defense when I beat daddy Rocky into hamburger.

The bottom line is I don't go out looking for a fight, EVER. I strongly prefer to avoid them, as anyone with permanent physical damage does.

Ok, thanks for the response, this is what the discussion needed, some perspective on what happened, the circumstances, because people were just imagining all sorts.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

Despite Fox News's insistence that people get bankrupt from their own fault, most cases of bankruptcy are caused from inability to pay medical expenses. It is absolutely scary, considering that I could come down with a chronic ailment and it will bankrupt me despite me saving diligently for my entire working life.

As someone on minimum wage, working two jobs just to pay a little bit of rent, and already in enough debt with university stuff... it sounds terrifying! It's hard enough paying for dental treatment, let alone any general health care!

Nothing in this world is free.

You got to pay some way or another.

Got no universal Gov health care? Have to pay out of pocket or have a debt, or pay for an insurance plan.

Got universal government health care? Have to pay higher taxes, and then you got the government making health care decisions for you and a lot less freedom in treatment options.

Take your pick. There is no way to have it perfect.

I'd rather pay the taxes... at least you know where you stand

How much does health insurance cost you? I wonder how much more it is than the amount you get taxed in this country for health care... and I wonder how much better the standard of care is...

Just looking at a guide estimate of how much tax you pay if you earn £15k (which is more than what I earn in my main job ), it'd be £493 a year... that's a little under £10 a week.

I certainly do not mind paying that for the peace of mind of having health care at my finger tips. Heck, we pay like double that for the combined cost of all benefits (job seekers, income support, disability etc) and pensions!

One thing I will admit, there's probably be a heck of a lot less alchohol related admissions if you had to pay to be treated

In this country, people end up in the A&E all the time cause their too drunk, or got in a drunken fight. I think there was actually talks recently of fining people who do that too often cause they are wasting NHS resources.

Anyway... sooo... relationships eh?

 

[enterthemadness]

oh oh...it's that tiiiiiime.

SuperMike!!! When you tackled him...was it like a WCW Goldberg Spear or what?

Yes...I seriously just asked that. Chill Hype...it's more of a joke question.

 

[terry78]

Nah, he was like The Miz.

 

[DV8]

Alrighty then. Fair enough.

Well, I’m in the middle of having sex with a girl, NSA type with a girl not looking for any relationship, and I get a knock at my door. It does not stop and turns into loud pounding. This was ruining it for me, and so we stopped, and I put on my jeans and answered the door.

Outside is a portly looking fellow, middle aged, and I never saw him before. He has his fists clenched and that I want to hit you look on his face.
He asks me "what are you doing with my daughter?!"

Now at this point I’m terrified. Being a sex offender in my state means knocking on neighbors doors, and telling them such, and not being able to own a firearm etc… I’m beat red in the face, and all I can think of is calling my dad's attorney. I’m pissed too, because she told me she was 22 years old.

So, I yell for her in the angry man voice, and she comes out of my room with her clothes a mess.

I turn to her and I tell her to get me her ID I want to see how you she is.
Her dad (the angry guy in my doorway) interrupts me with "Don’t bother, she’s 22 years old".

So I’m like "WTF?!?!? Is the matter with you she’s a legal adult, not your property, this is not your business".

I turn to her and as I’m asking her if she needs to leave I feel a horrible pain in my crotch and cannot breath. The old bastard had punched me in the balls.

As I’m doubled over he screams in my ear "**** you, you piece of **** she still lives under my roof".

I might not a heavyweight MMA guy or anything, but I’m still a 240 pound combat veteran, who both used to competitively powerlift and boxed while in the Army. I do make the short list of the kind of guy not to get into a fight with, and he crossed the line in more than one way.

So I tackled him off my deck, and pounded him into hamburger, right in front of his 22 year old daughter and I was already on the phone with my dad’s attorney before the police and ambulance got there. I’m ****ing happy the little turd had to eat with a straw for a long time. Yeah, the only part about that which pisses me off is having to pay a chunk of his medical bills, which given the context was out of line.

I may be late here, but uhhh . . . I don't think you were in the wrong ONE ****ing bit, Mike . . . if she lived under his roof or not, he has no ****ing business going to another grown man's house and sucker-punching him in the nuts . . . once his daughter turns 18, she has the right to make her own decisions; if he was going to inflict "punishment" it should've been on his daughter, not you . . . maybe you didn't have to beat him to a pulp, but I really don't think you were in the wrong at all; teach that ******* a lesson

 

[DV8]

PS, did you bone that dude's daughter anymore, SuperMike? LOL no, but seriously, did you?

 

[terry78]

I think it's because in fiction and in random media, the guy is always supposed to be scared of the chick's dad for some reason. And then we all talk about what we'd do to a guy that tried to bang our daughter if we ever have one, and if we encounter a Supermike, it throws our **** all off.

 

[SuperMike335!!]

PS, did you bone that dude's daughter anymore, SuperMike? LOL no, but seriously, did you?

Yes I did, few more times actually.

She felt bad and wanted to make sure my gear still worked.

I think some women are really turned on by violence. It was not a self esteem issue either. This was a girl who knew she was good looking, and did not want to get tied down, was into partying, and had a lot of male attention and options. So, the only thing I can assume, is she is attracted to violent men.

 

[SuperMike335!!]

oh oh...it's that tiiiiiime.

SuperMike!!! When you tackled him...was it like a WCW Goldberg Spear or what?

Yes...I seriously just asked that. Chill Hype...it's more of a joke question.

Nah, he was like The Miz.

I don't think I tackled him that hard, it was more the 4 foot fall, as I did not get a running start.

Funny you say that, as some people think I look like Goldberg a little.

Maybe cuz I'm a Jew with big traps?

 

[Anita18]

Yes I did, few more times actually.

She felt bad and wanted to make sure my gear still worked.

I think some women are really turned on by violence. It was not a self esteem issue either. This was a girl who knew she was good looking, and did not want to get tied down, was into partying, and had a lot of male attention and options. So, the only thing I can assume, is she is attracted to violent men.

OTOH, all that goes out the window if it's violence on THEM. I can't think of a single reason why any self-respecting woman would like to get a frying pan to her face or some other physical violence that sends her to the hospital.

Sadomasochism is one thing, but capability for extreme debilitating violence is another.