Pick-up lines for psychos/creeps/strange people/Hypesters!!!

[knowsbleed]

IF you were a psycho/creep/strange person/normal Hypester... what kind of pick up lines would you use? Here's some classics created by yours truly:


You remind me of my sister, except I haven't slept with you yet.

Are you free tonite? No? Well, how much do you charge?

Can I touch your tummy...from the inside?

Can I lick the tartar off your teeth?

My lust for you is like diarrhea...I just can't hold it in.

Girl, if I was a squirrel in outer space, I'd nut in Uranus.

You smell heavenly, reminds me of my basement. Don't know what I'm talking about? Oh, you will tonight.

Why don't we go back to my place and do half the stuff I'll tell everyone else we did anyway

Wow... you're beautiful. Guess I won't be using the burlap bag tonite.

Hey... should I wait for you outside, or would your closet be better?

Girl, I'd like to suck your face, lay an egg in your chest and burst through it in a geyser of blood and guts... just to get to your heart

I can tell by the way you're ignoring me that I should just wait for you in the backseat of your car. OH! did I say that out loud?

I'm going home to have sex... wanna join me?

Your body is made up of 90 percent water... and I'm thirsty.

If I said you had a nice body... would you mind going to a taxidermist with me to get a price quote?

Shhh... when you speak, breathe or act alive it ruins my fantasy.

Hey, can you upload more Facebook pictures to your profile? I get bored photoshopping us together using your current ones.

Hi, I'm Sawyer


Your turn!




*This reincarnation of an awesome old thread is brought to you by moi and was originally created by Equint and DOG LIPS.

 

[Kane52630]

"How do you like yo eggs?"

 

[Spider-X]

 

[Piper Maru]

Gaze upon my chiseled abs, I no longer have the crabs!

 

[moviedoors]

Does this smell like chloroform to you?

 

[DarkSovereignty]

You. Me. Insertion. Ya dig?

 

[Sawyer]

Hi, I'm Sawyer

 

[GENERAL RAAM582]

I think I might experiment with a few of these lines.

 

[ComicChick]

why didn't you just bump the old thread by equint and doglips?

 

[enterthemadness]

I have one that tops this all.

So, um, *insert name* will you like to get coffee some time?

 

[TheDreamMaster]

I like my women like I like my coffee...on ice.

 

[knowsbleed]

why didn't you just bump the old thread by equint and doglips?

I've found that Hypesters are more inclined to participate in a new thread than a previously established thread... especially if it's more than a year old. Seasonal threads seem to be the exception...

... that being said, if I told you that I admire you for your mind, would you let me take a closer look at it?

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

My personal favourite:

I hope your wrists are thin, otherwise these manacles might chafe...

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

I'm into flagellation, necrophilia and bestiality. Do you think I am flogging a dead horse?

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

This is not my bedroom!

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

You, me and a pool full of custard, lets go!

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

So, do you like basements?

 

[Monsieur Xavier]

Your eyes stink of sex.

 

[JewishHobbit]

Can I touch your tummy...from the inside?

This one for the win.

 

[Spider-Fan83]

"you remind me of my dead wife"

girl-"omg, when did she die?"

"she can be dead by next week, if you play your cards right"

 

[NickNitro]

"Hey, nice meet you, I really loved the pajamas you wore last night to bed"

 

[Hyde]

You know, I can peel an orange using my tongue.

Wanna see?

 

[Blitzkrieg Bop]

You have a nice body. I've been staring at it for weeks.

 

[webhead9707]

I've actually used this one, she thought it was funny.
*Sees girl wearing Lord of the Rings shirt*
"Hey there girl, can you Gimli your number?"

 

[DarkSovereignty]

You're skin looks so lovely and warm and comfortable...can I wear it?